2022-07-22: Love and Pride
- Log: 2022-07-22 Love and Pride
- Cast: Asuka Shikinami Langley, Kaworu Nagisa
- Where: Near Tokyo-3 Municipal Middle School
- OOC - IC Date: July 22, 0096 (2022)
- Summary: You can't forget love and pride. Because of that, it's killing me inside.
<Pose Tracker> Asuka Shikinami Langley has posed.
It's not as if Blue Cosmos actively pursues individual Coordinators, Half-Zentradi and Meltrandi. That's not how they work. Their methods are a bit more insidious. For the past few days rumors have been circulating that Kaworu is a Coordinator. Of the student body, the boys might hate him, but the pervasive attitude is more one of fear. Fear that being in his orbit will get them harmed too.
Rumors spread. They spread to upperclassmen, to big brothers and little sisters at home. 'Stay away from him.'
They spread to parents, Guardians and some of them grumble about how unfair it is that their kids are having to compete against a Genetic Freak in the class rankings. What's the world coming to? It enters casual conversation in Tokyo-3 establishments. Bars. Other areas.
And eventually it reaches the wrong ears. When you think of Blue Cosmos, you think of finely coiffed Britannian men in perfect suits speaking eloquently for a Blue and Pure World at some press conference in Pendragon. It's the dominant political power in the entire world. These Bosozoku at the bar aren't card carrying party members, furthest thing from it. If asked they'd even claim to hate Britannia, just they'd acknowledge that Blue Cosmos has a point.
One of them has a Cousin in the REA hurt by the ZAFT conflict. Another 'lost their job' to someone they suspected to be a Coordinator once upon a time, glossing over their highly negative performance reviews. Another just doesn't want to their little Niece in Elementary School to accidentally walk near the guy when sniper's bullets are coming his way at train stations.
Eventually they get a description. It's a shame Kaworu looks so unique. It unfortunately runs the risk of putting Rei in danger too one day by proxy, doesn't it? Then eventually Asuka, who looks less unique, but there's sure rumors of her physical prowess running around.
None even have the context they're NERV, that they're Eva pilots, that they protect them. That's not how this telephone game works.
They're all casually just waiting, watching the entrance of the school... waiting for Kaworu to come out. Each of them concealing some kind of weapon. Looking like a bunch of gang of five in their late teens to mid twenties loitering... just strangely on foot. When they see Kaworu, whichever way they goes... they all wait for him to pass, then one of them cants their head. Silently they all move out onto the sidewalk, filing behind, hands in their pockets.
Hikari and Asuka are leaving the school at about the same time. They're not going in the same direction. Hikari just sighs, "I hope this won't be a frequent thing."
"What?" Asuka asks her.
"Them, hanging around our school. It's not a good influence on the boys."
Asuka finally looks in the same direction, her gaze sharp as they're about to disappear from view... "Change of plans. You head home on your own."
As Asuka started to fast walk after them, "I'm not leaving--"
Asuka snaps at Hikari in interruption, "Then stay here!"
Hikari stays put, watching her go, and slowly withdraws her phone...
... wondering if she's going to have to call Misato for her again.
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
It really is fine to Kaworu that many of his classmates--at least some of whom formerly enjoyed his company--now avoid him. Before, the rumors of his being a Coordinator were treated more like a running joke. Sure, he looks otherworldly, and sure, he's good at basically everything, but he's just so friendly and welcoming! And isn't the idea of it so exotic~? It's like he's a bad boy with a heart of gold, only he acts golden all the time! ...that was the logic, anyway. Now it's a little more real. A lot more frightening. Someone was shot in the middle of the city. Who knows if the bullet will find the correct target next time?
Maybe once summer vacation has passed, those feelings will die down. Maybe they won't. Many of the girls might have liked Kaworu, but many of the boys were less fond by far. And so that rumor starts to spread with a deeper, more insidious malice, until it reaches the ears of those who want a target...
It's the last day of school, but that doesn't mean that cleaning duties aren't a thing. After helping him gather his things, Rei is required to stay behind with a few others to clean the classroom one last time before summer break. As he sits by one of the windows, waiting for her, Kaworu spies the ground of young men loitering near the gates. He reflects on this for a moment; then he announces that he's going to leave early and Rei doesn't need to worry about him for today.
A short time later, he passes through the school gates, passes the loitering group of young men, takes a turn in a certain direction, and waits. Sure enough, they follow.
It's a bit saddening, he reflects. But best to get this out of the way. He continues on at an even pace, walking cane and briefcase bag both in his left hand, waiting for them to make a move as he moves deeper into the city and away from the school.
<Pose Tracker> Asuka Shikinami Langley has posed.
Asuka's approaching at a stormy, violent gait, footsteps stabbing the concrete and arms swinging wide. She's got a gun in her bag, but that's not intended for this kind of situation. She's encountered this kind of gang in Nouvelle Tokyo before, the low level street thugs and biker's gangs who find Coordinators an easy scapegoat for life's problems.
When she catches up, she sees Kaworu just moving along at a steady pace, obviously oblivious in her eyes. 'Idiot' she thinks.
It's not like she minds the idea of him getting roughed up again. It's just she sees a problem in the making. An act that can become a pattern. A pattern that will eventually reach her, if she doesn't get ahead of it. Several of them are slowly drawing weapons from inside their motorcycle jackets. A pipe. A chain. Two of them with brass knuckles. And the last pulls out a knife.
She understands how badly she needs to get ahead of this immediately.
"Hey assholes!" Several of them whirl around, and seeing its a middle school girl with that angry expression, all of them don't take it seriously. "Walk away little girl, this is none of your business--"
"What are you, stupid?" Asuka storms right up to the one with the chain before he can even respond, grabs him by the jacket sweeping his foot with a simple trip and using that sudden loss of balance to shoulder throw him. "I'm the Coordinator you need to worry about, morons."
As he lands on the concrete. She stomps savagely on his crotch. "You think you're the first Blue Cosmos worshipping pricks I've taken--" Then again on the hand holding the chain, with a crack of bone his shout of agony cut off by the blinding haze of pain that just leaves him gasping on the ground. "--apart! I'm going to make an example of you losers that your Grandkids will feel!"
As the other four turn on her, one of them shouting, "Bitch!" "You must have a deathwish!?"
"Grandkids might be giving you all too much credit." She makes a sound like a feral animal as she starts backing up again, trying to prevent herself from getting surrounded in the rush, her eyes on the one with the knife and pipes as the most particularly dangerous target. "Don't think any of you are going to be knowing the touch of a woman again after today."
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
That murderous intent at his back only grows as he walks along. Kaworu keeps close track of it as he moves further and further into a more desolate part of the city. He can sense Asuka's presence too, but he pays it little mind; he assumes, at best, she just happens to have business in the direction, and at worst, is looking to bear witness to his next assault for her own amusement. He turns a corner into a broad alleyway, open on both ends. About halfway down it, chaos begins.
But that chaos comes from Asuka, as she confronts them at the mouth of the alleyway, just before they would have moved in for the attack. They all whirl around to face her, and she simply immediately moves in to crush them.
Kaworu turns, red eyes wide with surprise. She's trying to defend him...? 'I'm the Coordinator you need to worry about'--is she insisting on that narrative even now? But why? Does living up to the rumor that she's a Coordinator truly mean that much to her?
...All that said, even she might have a little trouble. She did well in her initial surprise attack, but there's still four left, two with serious weapons. His lips thin a bit as he considers the tableau. What should he do...? Normally he would assume that she would rankle at getting helped by him, but he also would never have assumed that she'd come to his rescue. Would it be best to act, or to let her do as she please?
For now, he sets his briefcase carefully against a nearby wall, then watches quietly as the fight unfolds. If nothing else, he can ensure he's able to act as necessary. Right now, he's willing to let her vent her hostility on these men--as long as she doesn't kill them, anyway.
...Though to Asuka, it probably looks like he's the one gearing up to enjoy a show at her expense.
<Pose Tracker> Asuka Shikinami Langley has posed.
It's much more simple really. If she thought Kaworu was actually in a life or death scenario, she might actually defend him. She doesn't. Most of these gangs don't go that far. Even the knife doesn't convince her. They might just carve up his pretty face or something. Whatever.
It's not her identity as a 'Coordinator' that matters. It's the fact that she's suffered for it, suffered for it enough to hate people like this. Enough that she wants to destroy people like this, to vent her anger on people that aren't soft targets.
To prove to all of them she's not some kid taking beatings in locker rooms anymore.
Still, easier said than done, she's won fights with greater odds, but usually she takes out more in the initial surprise attack. The others get rattled, make early mistakes, or some of them run. These ones aren't - yet.
"Gonna mess you up so bad that you won't be able to get married any more you patchwork freak." The one with the knife comes at her first. She brings her bag up as his knife digs its point into the leather. She promptly pushes forward as if to get inside his guard. "Yeah? If you're all that's out there-" Her other hand hand lashes out to clip his neck, as she brings it down to knee him in the Solar Plexus. The wind gets knocked out of him with a 'Whoof' of breath, but he's not quite down. "-who would want to?"
And a pipe swinging near her head prevents her from finishing the job. Ducking down abruptly, it swishes through her red hair. Even as one with the knuckles comes to her right side. He launches a haymaker that she turns her shoulder into to partially block. But the brass knuckles hit with bruising impact against flesh.
Feeling that pain surge through her arm, she snarls like some kind of feral cat. Rather than turn on him though, she suddenly pivots and launches her elbow backwards, striking the one raising a pipe overhead in the sternum with the elbow. This time the blow hits with a sickening crack and he wheezes as the pipe clatters to the ground. The one with another set of brass knuckles however has circled around to the side, and aims a blow right at her back.
This one strikes one of her kidneys with a rabbit punch, reinforced by metal.
Asuka bites down, trying her best not to shout out. The blow has at least staggered her though. And the one with the knife has recovered. As he moves around in her blind spot to... well... it's pretty obvious what he's going to try to do isn't it, Kaworu? Does she see it? Doesn't she? Will she recover in time to deal with it? Hard to say with four against one...
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
Really, if they did carve up his pretty face, so much the better for her. It would be much harder for him to sway Shinji's heart over to him if he weren't so handsome, wouldn't it? ...But the idea that Asuka might just hate people like this, who harm others for petty differences, who seeks to harm them first to prove she's no longer a victim, just doesn't occur to him--and for all his significant abilities, Kaworu can't actually read minds. He can sense her rage, but how is that any different from her usual?
For now, he watches quietly. She continues to handle herself well at first as she downs the one with the knife, but she's quickly overtaken by the next two. Even that isn't enough, as she simply snarls out her fury like a wild beast and lashes out anew, taking a third man down--but then the fourth hits her in the kidneys from behind.
It's a significant blow. Kaworu can tell this easily. What's worse, the man with the knife is recovering, aiming to make more significant work of Asuka. With enough time, she'd surely recover from that hit--but she won't be given that time. If he doesn't interfere, she will be significantly injured.
Which, in another world, still might not be enough to motivate him. But in this one, he is technically her superior, even if she isn't one of his direct subordinates. He has a responsibility to her safety.
Normally, when Kaworu walks with his cane, there is a bit of a 'tup tup tup' from the cane's metal end as it strikes the ground. Right now, it lands so softly that it makes no noticeable noise at all as he approaches, silent as an owl. He comes up behind the one who'd had the pipe and, while he's off-balance, pushes him forward with his left hand; as the man stumbles, slow and awkward, Kaworu sweeps his cane forward, its length sliding up and out his palm, so that the arced metal handle smashes into the knife-wielder's hand, forcing him to drop it just before his pipe-wielding friend rams into him. They're both sent sprawling, neither of them injured from the knife as they might have been with it still in hand.
The knife itself, Kaworu smacks down the alleyway well out of anyone's reach with the end of his cane. Then, pivoting on his uninjured right leg, he swings it around and smashes it forward into Brass Knuckles's throat, just hard enough to floor him without outright crushing his windpipe.
That still leaves one left, but as he pulls the cane back and twirls it around to set back down on the concrete, he looks around at the group with impassive elegance before zeroing in on the one left.
"You should leave, and bring your companions along," he tells him with cool politeness, "before she does worse to you."
<Pose Tracker> Asuka Shikinami Langley has posed.
Asuka's still recovering, from the shock to her side. Kidney punches hurt. They're organs that are quite sensitive and not meant to bruise. It's why the human body puts them there. It does nothing to dim her rage, only to delay it.
The knife wielder comes up around her - she barely blocks a punch from another of the thugs with the side of her arm. A blow which thumps her arm against her ear.
The shadow of the knife wielder falls over her and she pivots - too late.
That blow would have landed, save for the fact that Kaworu's silent tup-tup-tup of the cane is quiet as a mouse.
The Pipe Wielder who was already hurting from numerous cracked ribs, gets struck down, off-balance. The knife-wielder who is aiming at Asuka, has the knife fall from his abruptly bludgeoned wrist. The man yells as Kaworu likely breaks his wrist. And Asuka watches as the man who's blow she just blocked gets struck in the windpipe - and starts to gag.
It's certainly a more elegant contrast than Asuka's savagery, even hobbled. His politeness would certainly be appreciated by most. "You son of a-" The knife wielder aims a bare fisted blow at Kaworu, which almost certainly misses.
However... dodging that brings him right into the reach of another's brass knuckles, who aims a blow opportunistically at Kaworu's head, almost certainly ringing his bell. More than enough to floor most people, perhaps to break the skin, or leave a lump - certainly a bad concussion. The worst case scenario would be a bad bleed, or a skull fracture, but he's probably not in danger of that.
The man immediately tries to follow through again, whether he's still on his feet or on the ground. However, Asuka suddenly leaps into the air. She can get significant air, so this man's six foot height is no hurdle at all. Her foot comes down brutally in a blow to the base of his skull.
And he topples over senselessly.
Then with a casual fling while not even looking at the man with the broken wrist... the pipe that she now has in her hand hurls end over end towards him. Striking his head with a clang, as he topples- then hurriedly gets up and tries to run off.
Those who can soon follow. They don't even say anything to try to save face. Because they're trying to save their actual faces.
In the aftermath though, Asuka is holding her side, her injured kidney, breathing hard. And just staring at Kaworu... taking one breath after another... the only thing at all that breaks the silence in this moment.
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
Kaworu might fight with grace and speed, but he is still injured--in the leg, in the arm... and, though it doesn't look like it anymore, in the head. While he's able to easily sidestep the punch thrown at his face, his healing hamstring in his left leg mean that he can't move fast enough to avoid the follow-up punch aimed for his head. It strikes, and his head rings from the blow when it strikes very close to where he'd been shot. Advanced medical techniques mean SEELE's labs were able to fill in the cracks with a quick-healing material, but it's still sensitive, and the shot wasn't too long ago. Kaworu stumbles and lands hard against a brick wall--thankfully, with his good arm. However, it exposes his other arm, and as it's in a sling, it's very obviously a weak point.
But before anyone can try to wreck his shoulder even worse than it was, Asuka leaps. Before long, all their assailants are left scrambling for their lives, running off now that it's clear that while five on one might have worked out, five on two is out of their league.
It probably does little to dispel the notion that either of them are Coordinators, but it's a little late for that anyway.
For a few moments, silence reigns. Asuka pants as she clutches her injured side; Kaworu turns himself slowly to press his back to the wall and slowly sinks to the dirty ground. Cane hooked on the inside of his arm, he clutches the side of his head. As she stares at him, he stares back at her in turn, eyes hooded.
Then, quietly: "So, what brings you here?"
...as casually as if they'd happened to run into each other at the grocery store.
<Pose Tracker> Asuka Shikinami Langley has posed.
For a while she just stares, then without answering, makes it over there. Asuka eventually limps over to the wall. Sucking in oxygen, one breath after another. Even for someone like her, a quick and brutal fight still takes the breath out of her. There's no flow of LCL entering her lungs, just normal oxygen. Propping up her uninjured side against it, she just leans against it.
"Do I... need an excuse to take out the trash?"
Is her easy response. Though after a moment she tilts her head back and leans it against the wall too, looking up, and actually gives a more honest answer, "If they had beat the hell out of you today... just means they'll think they can get away with it... they'll brag about it to their trash heap friends... come back in greater numbers... so it's best to put them in their place, now."
A beat.
"And I enjoy it. That answer your question?" As she rolls the back of her head against the brick, to send one eye his way, framed by her sweat covered brow and bangs.
"Why'd you even join in?"
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
"It does," Kaworu says simply. From start to finish, it's a very 'her' response. It's natural that Asuka would respond to something that displeases her with violence. That said:
"I also enjoy fighting. There's a thrill in being able to make use of your strength freely," he replies with his usual calm--so calm that it might sound like he's lying, but as usual, he's not. "I usually prefer not to fight the weak, but they came in numbers today, and I'm recovering from my injuries. I thought it best to drive them away quickly." He pauses, considering the asphalt street and the concrete sky. "...Also, as administrator, I'm at least partially responsible for your safety. I couldn't very well ignore you being injured right in front of me."
She may be thinking it too; she may not. But he does remember what she told him once about getting ganged up on by other pilots in the AEU. He doubts she'd appreciate hearing that, though.
"But... I see. So you weren't trying to help me; you simply saw a problem for yourself in the making and decided to take preventative measures." He considers standing; he decides that, for the sake of his aching head, it would be best to remain stationary for a while longer. "That makes," he concludes, "much more sense."
<Pose Tracker> Asuka Shikinami Langley has posed.
There's this look of confusion as Kaworu notes that he actually enjoys fighting. It's not the expected response due to how calm, and placid he is... that he likes it. However at the same time it makes perfect sense. If you're an Eva pilot and you don't like fighting, you're certainly living a miserable existence aren't you? Though there's a twitch of her eyebrow as he says he's responsible for her safety.
"What are you, stupid? In what world would I ever need you to protect me?"
At the same time though, she remembers how she once thought he was setting her up for a beating like this, with NERV Personnel, with the other pilots. The moment they'd had enough with her, they'd come. They always do in her eyes. That hasn't happened though, and he could have just sat back and watched her get beaten up. That she didn't want him to interfere, still doesn't erase the fact that he did.
Maybe she was being paranoid all along. That fact doesn't sit well with her, admitting it to herself feels something like... humility.
However, she's not so humble that she'd admit it out loud.
Her acting in self interest, certainly does make a lot of sense.
There's a long exhalation of breath, as her breathing finally settles down, and she peels herself off the wall, still at a bit of a limp, limping over to him. And actually extending a hand his way as if she were to help him up.
"Come on." She says as she stares down at him with her blue eyes and sweat stained face, "Not gonna get in trouble with Misato for leaving you here."
Again self-interest, at least on her lips. The avoidance of punishment. She still hates him, so much, with every fiber of her being. However, it's still in her own grudging way, an apology, even if he won't understand it...
... for misjudging him.
"I'll take you far enough that you can get it looked at, at least."
That blow hit him where he got shot before, she knows that much at least from what information was made available to them. Thus... she knows at least that he needs to.
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
"I didn't say you needed me. I said I'm responsible for you," Kaworu counters, unruffled. That was, after all, the expected reaction. "Had you routed them on your own before I had a chance to fight, I'd also need to ensure that you didn't kill any of them."
So it other words, it goes both ways. But that's probably expected to her, too.
Confusion flickers in his eyes when she comes over to offer him a hand as if to help him up. When she explains that she doesn't want to get in trouble with Misato, it clears, and he nods once. He could probably refuse, but... there isn't really a reason to this time. If it helps settle her pride, it's fine.
He accepts her help, easing himself upward with his good leg as he rises. Once he's back on his feet, he slides his cane down his arm by its handle, grips it, and sets it down. He wobbles a bit, but he stays on his feet.
"Very well. I'd rather not gather another crowd that thinks I'll be an easy target," he concedes. It's true of both of them, really. Strength in numbers isn't just for the weak.
And so they make their way out of the alleyway, over to... a waiting car with tinted windows, and a man in a suit giving them both a stony stare behind dark shades. The badge on his chest identifies him as a member of Section 2. Looks like Kaworu and Asuka chased off those thugs before their minders could intervene.
"Inside, please," the man says curtly, opening a door for them. It looks like the back is sectioned off, so they'll continue to have privacy, at least.
Kaworu nods once to him. Then he looks over at Asuka expectantly. "After you."
She was injured too, after all.
<Pose Tracker> Asuka Shikinami Langley has posed.
There's a cluck of her tongue, that sounds dismissive as he notes that he's responsible for her. "Tck." It sounds like she might snap at him, or leave it at that. However...
"I wouldn't have killed them. Unless there was no choice. It's the duty of the elite to protect the ignorant masses." As she casts a scathing glance at one of them, "Even masses as ignorant as them."
Pulling him up, she slides an arm around his shoulders, on the opposite side of the cane to support him on the other side. As he notes he doesn't want a crowd to think he's an easy target. "Why are you just walking around alone town in your condition anyway? Do you want to get shot again?" She asks bluntly, like even if she wasn't doing this for him, she at least recognizes that he's an easier target than usual right now.
And the two start walking to the end of the alleyway as she spies the car in the distance. It hurts actually, supporting him this way, step by step, every time the added weight comes down on her shoulders, there's a soft grunt from her, due to the pressure it puts on her wounded side.
The Section 2 agent is present, and for a while it seems like she's just going to let him off there. However, 'After you.' As she gives him a frustrated glare. She was going to try to chalk up the agent bidding them inside as being solely about Kaworu, but now it means she can't play it off.
And Asuka for how often she rails against authority knows better than to defy Section 2.
Stepping up near the door frame so Kaworu can grab ahold, she moves inside, her face spasming as she scootches over to the other end of the back. Whether she'd like to admit it or not, she needs this looked at. The chances of internal bleeding are not small.
Eventually she's in position and puts on the seatbelt, staring out the window on the other side. Once he's inside, and the car starts to move...
"Baka Shinji seemed relieved to see you back."
It's just an idle comment, however it's also a pointedly accurate observation.
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
"It's the duty of the elite to protect the ignorant masses, yet you went out of your way to pick a fight with them?" Kaworu notes. He doesn't press further than that, though. It's a largely rhetorical observation.
He tenses when she moves in closer to slide an arm around him, something she'll feel easily along his shoulder blades. However, he doesn't stop her or protest. Instead, he replies, "No. But if I'm alone, no one else will need to get involved." Considering that Rei has been accompanying him a lot this past week, helping him out as Asuka is right now, it might make sense that he'd worry about her well-being.
For now, though, Section 2 makes its move--and while there's just this one agent and just this one car in front of them, Kaworu has no doubt that there's more in the area, watching them from afar. Asuka moves inside; he takes the seat next to her, moving gingerly to avoid jostling his injuries. Soon he too is buckled in, and the door is closed, and they're on their way.
He expects the car ride to be silent. It's just a trip to the nearest hospital for both of them to get checked out. It's not like either of them did any of this because they like the other. But...
'Baka Shinji seemed relieved to see you back.'
Something in Kaworu's chest squeezes tight. It's a strange feeling, and one he can't quite name. He glances her way, but she's staring out the other window. He chooses to do the same on his side.
"Yes. He's a kind soul who hates to see others get hurt," he says quietly. "The report didn't specify this, but he was the first on scene when I was shot."
<Pose Tracker> Asuka Shikinami Langley has posed.
"You think they wouldn't have had other victims, after you?" Asuka retorts, at what she perceives is an accusation of hypocrisy. Asuka eyes him, for a moment - then longer. It's not like she didn't notice that Rei was hanging around him a lot after school. And, there's this soft accusation in turn, "... You knew you were going to be attacked today, didn't you?"
Once inside the car though, and it starts moving.
Two souls looking out opposite windows. If they can see each other its only the faintest reflection, more a smear of light.
"Yeah he mentioned." Asuka notes, distantly, "On the radio, after. He was upset when we didn't get more than that first update."
There's no need for her to be prideful over that. It's just the truth about someone else. She could bring up the lunch the other day, but that would acknowledge that she noticed it. Perhaps he noticed her or Hikari, but she still won't admit it.
Asuka lapses into silence for a while, perhaps waiting on his answer, then...
"Something about falling on his knife too, I think. Sounds like he did his best to defend you."
It's still abstracted, she's thinking about after Africa, when Kaworu said Shinji would jump into hell to save her...
... but it's not just her is it? He risked death more there than he would in an Eva for Kaworu.
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
The lunch was delicious. Kaworu doesn't need to eat, and as a result usually doesn't bother, but he savored every bite of that bento later that day, at home, for dinner. It's said that cooking is a way to convey one's love, and he wanted to relish every morsel of it. It was, truthfully, his entire evening. When he was done, he even felt simultaneously empty and complete. Satisfied and filled with longing.
But he's not going to discuss that with Asuka.
"I suspected," he replies. "I happened to catch sight of them from the window, and given recent tensions at school, I thought it likely they were there for me. When they started following me, that confirmed it." He pauses a beat. "I didn't expect you to follow too, though."
Even if they do see each other's reflections, it's only of the other turned away, looking outwards at the passing street signs. It's not late, and in summer the sun's out for a long time, so it'll be bright for a good while longer, but the tinted windows bring significant darkness to the world all the same.
But... so Shinji was upset, hm. "I see," he murmurs, imagining it. He doesn't need to imagine Shinji falling on his knife, though; he'd seen it for himself. His chest continues to ache... He chuckles faintly. "I told you. That's the kind of person he is. His kindness fuels his strength."
The fondness and affection in his voice is as unmistakable as the flat resignation. "But when it comes to daily life, he's far fonder of you. All you have to do is give his cooking the faintest of praise, and he comes alight with joy." He pauses. Though his tone remains calm and even, there's a note of agony buried within as he concedes, "...It seems you make him happy."
Another pause, longer than the first.
And: "How do you feel about him?" he wonders, now carefully controlled into neutrality.
<Pose Tracker> Asuka Shikinami Langley has posed.
"I almost didn't." Asuka says after a moment, admitting at least that she hadn't seen them, "Hikari spotted them. She was worried about a gang hanging around the school. The influence it'd have on the boys."
Honestly she doesn't care about the influence it'd have on the boys. She does care though about what Hikari thinks... though. Even if she doesn't say as much, the two had started to bond in ways that Asuka hadn't yet with any other girl.
That isn't to say she hasn't bonded with Mari as that's far from the truth, in fact her few moments of vulnerability have been witnessed by her. It's just... Mari is so Mari. And Hikari is so normal. It's a different kind of relationship with another girl.
Asuka listens to what he says about Shinji though, something twisting in her stomach. She still hates Kaworu. Nothing about today has changed that. She just realizes that she's misjudged him. And Asuka for all of her faults, at least tries to hate him fairly. Her view of him is updating in real time.
"You did."
She says, rather than saying he's right or wrong. Just acknowledging that it was in fact said. It's a sort of neutrality which is remarkable only for the fact that Asuka is rarely so neutral. It might as well be an admission.
He talks about how fond Shinji is of her, how little she has to do in order to make him happy.
That she makes him happy.
And that's a strange notion for her, the idea that she can make people happy. She doesn't even know what happiness is.
How does she feel about him?
"I don't call him Daddy's Boy anymore. And I gave her permission to call me Asuka." She notes, perhaps it's obvious. Everyone should have noticed that by now. "I didn't used to let make me lunch. He wanted to do it so much though... so now it's fine."
This doesn't really say how she feels though?
Eventually however... she lets her pride go on one thing, and admits her views have changed on one thing.
"... I don't want him to leave anymore. He has nowhere to go. Back to that place? It wouldn't be better for him at all. I guess... I've grown a little used to living around him."
She could ask him how he feels. However, that's not for her, not yet. She's misjudged Kaworu one too many times today. And she wants to be sure she has an accurate assessment of how he feels about Shinji, how much effort he puts into him, before... asking.
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
"I see... So that's why." Asuka always does get close to Hikari, time and timeline again. She might not have realized that they'd been following Kaworu at all at first. The idea that she might have come to his aid purely by coincidence is genuinely funny to him. But it really does make the most sense that way. They've never gotten along. But it's only logical to do something to ease the worries of someone you care about.
...So she has someone she cares about, too. Enough to go out of her way to take care of it. She might have benefited too, but the one who noticed first was Hikari. She's a kind girl, too, though she tends to be tough on boys. Kaworu doesn't consider himself a 'boy' per se, but he does take the form of one, and he doesn't mind if others see him as one accordingly. Even the pronouns he uses, he uses because it's simpler that way.
But the main topic isn't Hikari, it's Shinji. Asuka acknowledges what Kaworu had said about him without argument. Neutrality doesn't suit her any more than happiness does, but here they are anyway. And it's not as though it's her happiness he's concerned with.
She tells him several things he already knew or noticed. He waits; he's very good at waiting. Eventually, Asuka admits that she no longer wants to drive him away. That she's grown used to him. For someone who so viciously shoves others away, it's a huge admission. Especially since her reasoning is because that place in Middle Hakone wouldn't be better for him. In other words, in her own way, she's thinking about what would make him happy too.
Kaworu shuts his eyes.
"...You're more capable of seeing others than I thought," he observes softly. "Perhaps it's because you're incomplete."
A neutrally-delivered statement. He doesn't elaborate on it; from his tone, it might have been more to himself than to her. Instead, he falls into the silence of thought. Finally, he speaks up again: "Are you going to be gentler with him going forward, then?"
<Pose Tracker> Asuka Shikinami Langley has posed.
Asuka gives him a dark glare as he says she's incomplete. As if he's bringing up the Shikinami Series again. It's definitely an off limits topic for her, however, she's not certain he is right now. It's not as if she isn't aware of some facets of her creation.
Not all perhaps, but some. Enough that the word 'incomplete' could be such an awful insult for her.
One in which her gaze tries to warn him to tread lightly.
Eventually her eyes return to the window. As Kaworu asks if she's going to be gentler with Shinji. There's a soft lidding of her eyes, as she thinks about how to answer that. Eventually she decides, there's no point hiding it. So many saw it.
"... I helped rescue that Kaiju you know. The munchkin. STORAGE wanted him for study but I handed him to the Shuffle Alliance. They're the experts on making sure he's clear of D.G. Cells. Gotta make sure nothing like that gets loose again."
However... it goes deeper than that doesn't it?
"I realized he saw me like his big sister." Her voice takes on this, edge, "That girl. Realized it a while back, actually."
There's a lengthy pause, as she watches the scenery go by, her side hurts, "I'd already decided I didn't want him to see me like that going forward."
...
...
...
"Even before you called me out."
It's perhaps a surreal moment for Kaworu, like she's actually admitting blame for once. It's not apologizing, but it is saying she was wrong.
It's such a roundabout way to say 'Yes I intend to be gentler with Shinji.' but perhaps it demonstrates it better than anything she could say about him.
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
'Incomplete' isn't meant to be an insult, at least. To Kaworu, it's merely a statement of fact... specifically, about the state of her soul. But she probably wouldn't know that much, and she doesn't ask or comment--only glares, something he sees in the reflection in the window--so he says nothing further on it.
Instead, he waits for Asuka's answer, and listens when she gives it. He hadn't been present to actually watch the battle, and by the time he'd emerged from the maintenance tunnel, the battle was already over... but it's true that Anti was in Unit-02's hands by the time that happened. It's also true that Asuka knew explicitly that he was a kaiju, and that she could have handed him over to NERV and STORAGE but instead gave him to the Shuffle Alliance. While Kaworu doesn't think that Yuka would have hurt Anti, she's ultimately just one scientist in a much larger overall organization, and NERV has only been softened by its partner groups. Gendo Ikari still stands at its head. And, as Asuka points out, the Shuffles are the experts on DG Cells; they're the ones who can best see to Anti's health.
And that would be enough of an answer. It's a great kindness, a thoughtfulness, that she's demonstrated. But then she goes on to discuss Anti's 'sister'--Akane, he realizes a moment later. Akane, who is his friend, but who has always struggled with treating Anti kindly.
Akane, who Asuka says she doesn't want to be like... and hasn't since even before Kaworu became angry with her.
Kaworu turns to stare at her. He keeps staring for a long moment. It is a roundabout way of saying yes, but he understands it all the same. Because he understands it, his heart breaks. Because...
"I see.
"He really will be happy with you, then."
He smiles as he looks away back out the window, but it's suffused with the melancholy of resignation. This isn't the result he desired, but he already vowed to stop being so selfish--or at least, keep his selfishness more in check. Being here, staying here, is already unforgivably selfish. So if this is what's best for Shinji... so be it.
<Pose Tracker> Asuka Shikinami Langley has posed.
Asuka's not looking his way, but she can feel his eyes on her. It's definitely a change for her. A difference than her usual, that sometimes she can actually have these moments of more honest communication, brief as they are.
Ouka completely misunderstood her intentions, and it resulted in the worst case scenario. Anti, her intentions were misunderstood, and thus she was publically humiliated.
It's not a great feeling, to try to reach out one's hand in their own way, and have it rejected, misunderstood, or betrayed. It made her question whether it was right to change at all, to accept the presence of other people in her life.
So these moments can happen, from time to time.
Eventually he acknowledges that he'll be happy with her.
What is happiness though? She's not certain. She doesn't think she's ever felt it herself. She knows other people can feel it, she can observe moments where they're happy objectively. She saw the way Shinji smiled at her the other day.
She knows that she... doesn't mind it, the idea that she might make someone happy.
Is it fair to them though if she's something she might never know in return? That they try again and again to make her happy, and what if she never feels it?
She doesn't know... maybe she should at least let them try, though.
Worst case scenario, she ends up no less inhuman than she is right now.
She doesn't answer Kaworu as she ruminates over the subject... though eventually...
... her thoughts change, back to the term 'incomplete'. Those connotations make her think of the two people who know and have told her they know. Kaworu, and Alouette.
"What were you trying to do, ordering Tako-Atama to apologize?"
She breaks the silence again, by changing the subject.
"What kind of weird game were the two of you playing at there?"
It doesn't make sense to her now. The thought that Kaworu was trying to entrap her. It doesn't make sense anymore.
... so she asks.
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
It must be painful to be misunderstood, just as she's trying to change into a better person. But Asuka is also someone who goes out of her way to make sure she'll be misunderstood. Kaworu is willing to believe her now, but she's also a person who gives constant mixed signals. Dealing with her is aggravating to say the least, and only one of many reasons why he hates her in turn.
But...
Those are the parts of her that are still like Asuka Souryuu Langley. The parts of her that are uniquely her... aren't as bad, he's coming to find.
They're not great. She's still violent and hostile and stabs thorns out from her heart to defend herself. But he can't imagine that Souryuu would have ever looked at herself and seen anything she thought needed changing. The blessing and curse of confidence, one supposes.
More importantly, how to gently push her and Shinji together...? Is such even necessary? If Shinji is attracted to her, and she's attracted to him in return, is it inevitably that they might join together? They do spend a significant time together--far more than Kaworu does with either of them. Interfering might only make things worse. (Hasn't his interference always made things worse?)
Beyond that, he's not sure he can stomach it. Perhaps it would be best to take a step back and watch over them from afar, as he's already committed to doing... Now that he has confirmation of how she feels about him, he can rest easy. ...easier. Ah, but both of them are such awkward beings, Shinji in his charming way, Asuka in her aggravating way... would it be better if he at least gave them a nudge...? If not on her side, then his... Oh, but...
It's hard. He wants so much to do something for Shinji, to bring him happiness. But what can one do when it's best for one to stay away?
Asuka speaks up then, breaking him from his spiraling thoughts. He blinks over at her; he hadn't anticipated that she'd try to resume the conversation, though when he absorbs the actual questions, it makes a little more sense. But only a little.
"Game?" he echoes. He shakes his head. "Alouette violated you." (An extreme way of putting it, but then, Kaworu knows about the Geass.) "That wasn't appropriate. I explained this to her and told her she should apologize and accept your judgment." He looks back out the window. "I understand it went poorly."
What was he trying to do, though? That takes a little more consideration. "...Alouette, in a word, adores you. She tried to imitate you for a time because she looks at how you behave and sees several who also adore you despite it, and mistook that as because of it. I personally think you're a bad influence on her and would rather you two stay away from each other, but I--understand what it feels like."
To feel so strongly for someone that you can't stay away. No matter how much wiser it would be if you did.
He falls silent for a moment. Then he breathes out a soundless sigh. "...but I digress. When she kissed you, she was in the wrong. Once I found out about it, I wanted to do my job as administrator and correct it. At the same time, she insisted she wanted a relationship with you, so I didn't want to interfere overly much." He shakes his head slowly. "I didn't think she would end up assaulting you again... I do apologize for that. I would have apologized earlier, but you never submitted a complaint, so I thought you probably wanted to pretend it never happened."
After all, the whole reason he ever learned about it at all was because Asuka brought it up out of suspicion, then tried to shove it away as a non-issue. "Either way, I gave her a sterner talk after that, so I hope she has a better understanding now of how she hurt you. Has she left you alone since then?"
<Pose Tracker> Asuka Shikinami Langley has posed.
Asuka is at a crossroads of sort in her life. Wherein she could return to how she was, stay on the same path, or try to change further. So many things were certain for her before, now nearly nothing is. She's certain she hates Kaworu, but it does in fact matter to her that she's misjudged certain aspects of his behavior. Interpreting them in the worst possible light, through the lens of her past experiences, painting him with the same broad brush as people who hurt her before, do everything in their power to make certain she fails just so they look good.
Which is why when he begins, she's inclined to believe him at least, that he wasn't trying to set her up. Otherwise, why would he have helped her back there at all??? "'Poorly' is a word for it." She grits it out, looking back out the window, not yet interrupting him.
However the more he speaks about Alouette adoring her it causes her to peel her elbow off the window and give Kaworu a look like he'd sprouted another head. "Adores me? 'Imitates' me? And that's what she thought was a good impression of me?" It makes a certain amount of sense she supposes. That whole moment and the day before was surreal that 180 in behavior. She'd swear it started in that weird dream she had before...
... but it was just a dream...
It makes a certain amount of sense to her that Alouette misunderstood her, because who does understand her? Back then she was only just toeing into the realm of wanting people in her life at all. Kaworu though speaks through what happened, his own impressions of being in the wrong. Knowing she wants a 'relationship' with her, causes her to arch an eyebrow strangely... in this 'really???' kind of way. As he apologizes again, and again. Sincerely.
It's so different from Alouette who thought she was imitating Asuka by giving a dismissive apology, when the reality is that Asuka would allow her fingernails to be ripped off one by one before she would ever apologize. Rather than answer his question. "The reason I didn't submit a complaint is because I like to handle my problems on my own."
That's no surprise on its face that she'd take that attitude. However she then stares at Kaworu, blue eyes reflecting in his red in ephemeral purple, "And the reason I thought you were playing games is because she called me by my serial number - and because she said you 'required' her to apologize."
She ordinarily wouldn't break her silence on that, however it's impossible to understand why she thought this was some scheme on his part without it, "You're one of the few people that knows that - she didn't know a thing about me when she transferred over. Naturally, I thought you sent your friend to entrap me. Provoke me into hitting her. Or she hits first, I hit back - you take her side. That's all you need."
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
'Poorly' is certainly a word for it. Asuka can probably tell by now that Kaworu has a tendency to understate things, though. While she may hate him, and the feeling may be mutual, at least they can hate each other for actual reasons rather than misunderstandings.
He shrugs at her incredulence about Alouette. "I wasn't there for it, so I can't remark on the details. But yes. Whatever she said or did to you, she thought that was the sort of thing you would say or do. She thought that was the way to make a bond with you." His unenthusiastic tone probably conveys plenty about what he thinks about that.
Then Asuka stares at him in a 'really???' sort of way. "Yes," he says to the unspoken question. "She truly does. I don't understand it, either. I asked her to explain it to me, but she wasn't able to in a way that made sense to me. If I had to stake a guess, I suspect she has the idea that you are loved, and thinks that if she can get closer to you, she'll be loved as well. But I'm not sure that's correct. If it were, then anyone popular would do. However, she's made it clear to me that it has to be you." He turns to meet her stare. "She likes you. She wants to be closer to you."
He doesn't know if stating these things plainly will make things better for Asuka and Alouette. But if this is something he can do for her, then at least Asuka can have a clear understanding of Alouette's desires. Startlement takes flight on his expression like a little bird when she brings up the serial number and the 'requirement.' "...I didn't tell her your serial number. I haven't told anyone. You made it clear that's not something you want shared," he says softly, neutrality returning. He didn't tell Alouette her serial number, but... so that's what memories of hers Alouette saw. Alouette's attachment makes somewhat more sense to him now. "And I didn't 'require' her to apologize, but I did tell her she 'should' if she wants a genuine relationship with you. To her, it must have sounded like the same thing."
The concept that Kaworu might have been trying to use Alouette to hurt Asuka, though, makes him peer at her, upper lip lightly scrunched--not a sneer, but perhaps the beginnings of one. It settles a moment later. "I have no interest in entrapping you or provoking you. I just don't want you abusing Shinji," he tells her bluntly. It does occur to him why she might have thought that, though, so he continues, "That's the only reason I challenged you for the right to pilot Unit-02 the day I arrived at headquarters. If I hadn't, you would have struck him. Preventing that was the only reason I bothered. That's the same reason why I dropped it so easily.
"Furthermore, when we discussed Shinji later, you were so hostile to the idea of not mistreating him that I thought if I made it about him alone, you wouldn't listen. That's why I told you not to strike any other NERV pilots in general--" an extra critical note enters his voice, "since it was certainly too much to expect you to stop berating them for no reason."
<Pose Tracker> Asuka Shikinami Langley has posed.
Asuka begins briefly to wonder if she's been transferred to another realm where nothing makes sense just because the truth is stranger than the fiction she made up in her head. The idea that Alouette??? Likes??? Her??? After she challenged her in the sims, and she refused to acknowledge her skills? It does make the kiss make more sense at least, though... what is it? Is she just attracted to her physically? Does she like her as some 'dangerous' individual that she hears many girls like in guys?
Her eyes slide to the upholstery as she contemplates the idea of another girl like - liking her like that despite her treating her that way.
However Kaworu catches her eyes again as he makes it clear that she wants to become closer to her. "Tck."
Asuka tears her eyes away and she looks out the window to hide the flustered shade of pink that's bloomed on her face. This wasn't a possibility she's ever thought about!
Asuka has mixed feelings though when he notes that he did not in fact bring her serial number up. Nor did he order her to apologize. Where'd Alouette get it then? Why'd she lie? However, she doesn't think he's lying here either. It's an unusual circumstance where she'd have been inclined to believe him about very little before, and most things now.
It becomes even more surreal as he explains that all of his actions back when he first met were about Shinji. That he challenged her to prevent her from striking Shinji. Her eyes turn back on him, as she gives him a contemplative look. There's a certain intensity within it, but it's not an angry intensity, despite the subject being all about her behavior towards Shinji.
Because there's a pattern. Shinji. Shinji. Shinji.
"How long have you been in love with him?" It's a blunt question, and perhaps unexpected that Asuka would ask that after a conversation so thoroughly about her bad behavior that one might think she was being upbraided. It's so easy with her volatility that one would think she'd explode just from that thorough description of his own motives being just to obstruct her towards Shinji.
That's not what happened though. And for Kaworu it might be especially surreal that any version of Asuka Langley would be able to determine that without someone telling her outright. That she might just be that observant, rather than absorbed on herself.
"Wasn't that the first day the two of you had met? What are you actually telling me here, that it was love at first sight for you?"
However, the barrage doesn't stop coming, "You were willing to go to bat and compete with me for his sake that day, but now you're giving up without a fight when it's higher stakes than that? Is it because you're worried he's not into guys or something?" Unfortunately, being Asuka, she doesn't know when to quit. There's no cruelty in it, not this time, but there's also no mercy either. "Or-? What's going through your head here?"
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
Truth sometimes is stranger than fiction. But sometimes it's also due to the assumptions people make. Things seem out of place, things don't fit, because people have an idea of the way things are that isn't actually correct. That's true for Asuka. And it's true for Kaworu, too. He hasn't really ever thought of her as someone who cares enough about other people to notice things about them. She's not stupid; she's not inobservant; she just only values herself. That's the Asuka Langley that exists within Kaworu Nagisa, incomplete or otherwise. When she dismisses the topic of Alouette (and again there is an assumption; for Asuka, that she lied, and for Kaworu, that she misunderstood) with a noise of irritation and falls into silence, he expects that to be the end of the conversation.
He certainly doesn't expect her to ask so directly about his love for Shinji. His entire body tenses. It's slow to un-tense, too, as Asuka points out that it should have been their first meeting that day. There's no ill intent behind her words--he can feel that much--but at the same time, she isn't going to let his little ideosyncracies go.
What's going through his head here?
For a moment, he doesn't respond. Then, gradually, he lets out a sigh. Asuka is the last person he would ever want to confide to about his most precious, most vulnerable feelings, but... in a way, it's a relief to be able to discuss them. To acknowledge they exist, to someone who knows exactly who it is he loves.
"...Long before I was assigned to NERV HQ, I was given files on all the other Children. I was acquainted with your personalities, your backgrounds, and the wounds that fray your hearts well before we met in person," he says quietly. This is true. It's even true this timeline; he needed to be updated on in-universe changes, after all. "I've felt a kindred soul in Shinji Ikari for a long time. It's not exactly correct to say it was love at first sight. But it's not exactly incorrect either."
He pauses. Voice straining, he continues, "As for the stakes... I'm already well aware that Shinji doesn't--he doesn't have feelings like that for me." He turns his face away further, hiding it even from the pale reflection in the glass. "I just want him to be happy. Even if his happiness... rests with you."
<Pose Tracker> Asuka Shikinami Langley has posed.
Asuka's watching Kaworu now, head still propped up against her auburn hair, body still turned sideways to keep her injured flank from throbbing more than it already does. She's not looking at him with anger, or hatred - even if she feels the latter. Right now it's just if anything a queer sort of interest in what in fact makes him tick.
After misjudging him for so long, she at least wants to get him right from now on.
He speaks of how he was given files on the other children, how he became acquainted with them. And how he felt a kindred soul in Shinji Ikari. Love at first sight, both no, and yes. The truth is somewhere in the shades of in-between.
Kaworu though immediately confirms that Shinji doesn't have feelings like that for him. And that he just wants him to be happy. Even if it rests with someone he feels only hatred for - or at least that's what she believes by the way he emphasizes you.
She doesn't... really understand happiness... the idea that Kaworu might sacrifice his disdain for Shinji's happiness. However, she's begun to feel at least like, even if she doesn't understand it, she wants other people in her life to feel it.
"So it's almost like he was a fictional character in a novel for you at first. You read about him and he became your favorite of all of us." Asuka can't know the context that Kaworu loves nearly all Lilim, and loves Shinji most of all of the Lilim. Her blue eyes look upon him, "And then the moment you met, it was like you already loved him, since before you were face to face."
It makes a certain amount of sense to her certainly. She might have held the idea in contempt in the past, called him some kind of fanboy in the same way she called Yoko a fangirl. However...
... Asuka pauses, thinks about it for a time, turns it over in her head. And thinks there's at least some ground she can offer him, because she misjudged him that badly. "Alright. Tell you what. If it's like that, and you're standing aside... then there's no reason for me to twist the knife. I don't like you, and you don't like me... but I won't rub it in your face... and I won't tell anyone either."
Perhaps it's not going to alleviate the hurt at all, after all, all she's offering is not to make things worse for him. However, it's something she can do, because she at least knows...
... that everyone expects the worst of her.
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
It's not an inaccurate interpretation. Kaworu can accept a lot, but Shinji being with Asuka romantically has always strained his ability to handle. Still, he does accept it. If he couldn't, he wouldn't simply be standing aside like this.
He doesn't contradict her reinterpretation. It isn't really like that--Shinji's file made him intrigued by him, prompted him to approach him--but it was only after they actually met that his feelings matured. But there's no way that Kaworu can explain that. Asuka's take is... fine.
He blinks over at her when she makes a frankly quite charitable gesture. An Asuka who doesn't feel a need to be needlessly cruel? ...Did Anti really affect her by that much? He truly is an incredible kaiju. ...but it's probably not just that either.
It doesn't especially matter. Kaworu doesn't want to be close to Asuka regardless. But he nods once at her compromise. It truly is astounding; after all, she's already 'won.' There's no need for her to make any concessions to him save out of a sense of kindness. (And as much as he still hates her, that at least officially puts her over the likes of Alexis Kerib.) For Shinji's sake... that does make him feel a little better.
"...All right," he says quietly. A beat. Then: "Was there anything else you wanted to discuss?"
<Pose Tracker> Asuka Shikinami Langley has posed.
'All right.' 'Was there anything else you wanted to discuss?'
Asuka's eyes half-lid as she considers Kaworu. She sees him in a new light perhaps, but her curiosity about him ends only so much as the context of things relevant to her experiences with him. She doesn't like him. And he doesn't like her. Small talk to try and learn more about him wouldn't be a pleasant experience for either of them.
"Not really in the mood... my side hurts too much."
Asuka turns away, and is quiet for the rest of the car ride unless Kaworu breaks the silence.
(Spoiler alert: he does not.)