2023-09-07: Consequences
- Cast: Sayla Mass, Rita Bernal
- Where: Side 6: The Ra Mari II
- Date: U.C. 0097 09 07
- Summary: After the battle to stop the Neo Zeong II and save Jona Basta, Sayla Mass seeks out the Phenex in the Ra Mari II's hangar. She would have words with the spirit within -- and Rita Bernal will not deny her.
<Pose Tracker> Rita Bernal has posed.
I'm so sorry, Jona...
Resting in a medical bed before her, Jona Basta sleeps. Rita isn't sure when he'll wake up. If she wished, Rita could simply enter his dreams, but he deserves privacy. Especially from her.
Very few could see Rita in this state. She's not actively trying to manifest herself, and so she hovers invisibly to the side of Jona's bed, watching over him.
So much has gone wrong. I can't even promise that you'll be safe after this. With the amalgamation taking the monster...
She shakes her head. If Rita wasn't so fearful of the Phenex being controlled by the tortured spirits of Denver Colony, she would go out and destroy it now. Should she go try to take control of Gryps-II? Would even /that/ be enough, now that the amalgamation has the Neo Zeong II?
Time passes. Rita silently watches over Jona.
...until something prickles at the edge of her awareness. Someone is approaching the Phenex with purpose, unlike the technicians and engineers of the Ra Mari II simply walking around to do their jobs. Someone means to speak with her.
I'll be back, Jona. No matter what, I'll make sure you and Michele survive this. Whatever it takes.
Fading from the med bay, Rita's spirit returns to the heart of the Phenex. Though the machine is powered down, her cockpit opens, extending downward in an open invitation. If someone wishes to speak, it would be easiest for them both to do so here, where Rita's abilities are strongest. Even the weakest Newtype could see and hear her while within the golden Gundam.
<Pose Tracker> Sayla Mass has posed.
The Hi-Nu's reactor was still being worked back to life after it had been pushed too far.
The first thing Sayla had done after she'd gotten out of the cockpit was rush to Leina- confirming she was still there. That they were both still alive, still there.
But now, after taking her medication, Leina was asleep, and Sayla left her to rest. For now, Sayla something she had to resolve for herself. Someone she had to speak to.
She had made her way to the Phenex's place in the hangar. The golden full psychoframe suit was stood in front her. The body of the ghost that had brought them to this fight.
She stared at it silently for a fewmoments, as she searched for the presence within. To feel her. Eventually, she spoke up.
"Rita Bernal. I want a word."
Her voice sounds hard, cold, angry- even as she masks the worst of it.
<Pose Tracker> Rita Bernal has posed.
Sayla Mass. Rita doesn't need to reach out to feel the other woman's anger, it's clear in the lines of her face and the harshness of her voice.
I'm here.
Rita answers. She /does/ put effort into manifesting, now, standing just within the Phenex's cockpit. Today, she appears to Sayla as a young woman in her early 20's, wearing a simple white dress. It reaches down to her mid-thigh, embroidered with tiny flowers at the end of the skirt. Rita's skin is perfect, unmarked and radiant, and her hair falls around her shoulders like a golden cloud.
This is going to be painful. She may as well look the part she's been playing.
You may enter the Phenex, if you wish. It'll be easier for you to hear me. If you don't trust her, I understand.
Rita takes in Sayla's appearance. This is a woman so involved in the flow of Possibility, present in so many expressions of it. Who will she be upon this path, Rita wonders, vaguely.
Which name do you prefer, here? I've seen so many versions of you. So many different choices.
<Pose Tracker> Sayla Mass has posed.
Sayla's eyes flick up to Rita, 'standing' in the cockpit of the Phenex. Her eyes narrow. An invitation into the Phenex...
"I can hear you fine from here." Eve as she takes a few steps forward. It means the conversation might be overheard but at this point... so be it.
She's spent enough time in the cockpit of an RX-0 for now.
"Sayla Mass. Dr Mass if you'd rather use a title." If she had been speaking to Rita, another time, she might have been curious about those other versions of her she had seen. For someone who had lived a life like hers, made the decisions she did, how could she not?
But she hadn't met Rita earlier. She was speakiing to her after everything she had done.
The first question comes to her lips, unbidden. "Are you satisfied?" There's more venom in it than Sayla had expected, more anger. "Was it worth everything you left in your wake? All the suffering?"
<Pose Tracker> Rita Bernal has posed.
Rita inclines her head. So be it. Leina was already open about what Rita has done. Anyone here in the Ra Mari II could know about Rita's sins already.
As if in an effort to meet Sayla halfway, Rita raises her hand. The Phenex responds, bringing her own armored hand to the cockpit's entrance, palm-up. Rita steps onto it, letting herself be carried before Sayla. Rita sits at the edge of the Gundam's hand, legs hanging off the side.
Sayla, then. I'm afraid I have a grudge against the word 'doctor'. I'm satisfied with being called 'Rita'. Any title I earned in life was a sham to try and keep me complacent.
Not that it was ever needed.
Sayla's words strike Rita with enough fury to make the spirit's image flicker. It's difficult, as a being of pure connection and emotion, to weather such negativity on her own. In truth, Rita expected to be far away by now, never to face the consequences of her actions.
Alas, the path has changed beneath her feet. Rita looks to Sayla, a slight, perfect smile on her face.
Was it worth it?
Rita thinks back to Jona, sleeping safe in the med bay. Michele, alive and well in her own quarters. Shelby, Zoltan, Yuliana -- all alive. All able to go forward. Both Rita's sisters have accomplished their mission.
I cannot be satisfied until the monster has been destroyed. Humanity isn't ready for that kind of power.
Rita's voice is soft, breathy, and sweet. There's something hopeful in it. If Sayla were to let her guard down, perhaps she could feel the warmth of the Heart of the Phenex -- perhaps this Goddess among Newtypes could offer her peace.
Or so Rita would like to believe. After a moment's silence, she speaks again.
Yes. It was worth it.
<Pose Tracker> Sayla Mass has posed.
Sayla doesn't move as the Phenex lowers Rita down to her level. That momentary flicker doesn't seem to earn any reprieve from the emotions on display. The smile doesn't seem to calm her, either. If anything, the furrows in Sayla's brow deepen.
She cannot be satisfied until the II Neo Zeong is destroyed. The 'monster'. Well, they don't have a choice on dealing with that. It was just a matter of time until they were all deploying out again.
But when Rita says it was worth it, Sayla's anger flares. It boils there, for a few seconds, as Sayla finds the words.
"So you got what you wanted, then." Sayla says, that anger flowing through her words. "I don't appreciate being made part of your scheme. I don't appreciate the Yumi Foundation used as a part of your fight, of being made to sacrifice so many that we could have helped."
Her voice turns ice cold, the anger reaching it's Zenith. "But most of all, I will never, ever forgive for using my daughter for your damned 'prophecy'. For what you tried to make Leina do. Is that clear, Rita?"
<Pose Tracker> Rita Bernal has posed.
I am sorry. There was no better path, Sayla.
Again, Rita raises a hand, her shimmering, luminous form glowing a bit more brightly. Above her palm, it's as though reality... cracks. Miraculous light seeps into this plane from whatever is beyond it, and slowly, the crack expands. Rita nods once as it forms into a window.
A sea of stars can be seen, along with a familiar sight. The ruins that would become Magallanica.
Would you like to see what would have happened if Leina had not been within the Banshee on that day?
Sayla was there when this happened. She knows how it /should/ go. Distant, horrific light scorches across the sky, racing to impact with the dead Industrial 7, before the Princess can speak. As before, there are ships present, and mobile suits. Perhaps a few differ from what Sayla knew. Instead of a Nemo, a derivative of the High-Nu. The Eternal, instead of the Ra Mari II.
None of them matter. Not really.
Look carefully.
There's only one difference that concerns the firebird. Instead of the Banshee, the MP ZZ stands in line resolutely next to the Unicorn. The second sister is nowhere to be seen.
Gryps-II's laser reaches the heroes of the living, and...
The crack in reality splits. Another windows opens near Rita's palm. In one, the blue light obliterates everyone present. Before the Unicorn can begin her Miracle, she is wiped from existence. Nothing remains.
In the other, as the laser bears down on the assorted machines, the Unicorn begins to glow. Crystalline structures form, but too slowly. She's being destroyed faster than she's evolving. As if in an effort to buy her time, the MP ZZ rockets in front of the Beast of Possibility. In a matter of seconds, the machine vanishes. The Unicorn screams, transforms, and the Miracle plays out -- but weakly. The Perfected Newtype saves those nearest him, but cannot extend his grace to anyone else.
Or perhaps, you think, I could have found another to sacrifice. Anyone but her.
More windows open. As the first two play out the aftermath of the laser firing, these new cracks in reality start from the beginning. In one, Marida Cruz (not Zinnerman, not here), pilots the Banshee. The Gundam is wiped away in the face of the Colony Laser, Marida unable to embrace the Light of Possibility in life.
Another. Captain Lilith Aiden pilots the Gundam, and again, the Banshee fails. Lilith's heart didn't have enough love for the pilot of the Unicorn, and their connection failed when it was needed most. Everyone perishes.
More windows. More. More. They open around Sayla, half-curling around her in a patchwork quilt of death, destruction, and failure. In one, the Phenex herself attempts to intervene in the place of the Banshee, but her presence during the Miracle drags the Unicorn through her Ascension too quickly, and the would-be Magallanica is destroyed, along with the rest of the heroes.
There was one path. Only one.
Rita looks absently at the visions. Her gaze is inhuman -- her green pupils eclipsed by miraculous, prismatic light.
Tell me which Leina would have preferred, Sayla. As her mother, you should know, shouldn't you?
Windows of possibility splinter into sub-windows. Endless paths. Infinite possibility. Rita has navigated them all.
I won't ask you to forgive me. But I was not acting out of malice. You would have saved these sacrifices only for them to die in terror and agony weeks later.
<Pose Tracker> Sayla Mass has posed.
There was no better path, Sayla.
The words ignite Sayla again- but before she can speak again, before she can answer, Rita exposes her to what could have been.
To a moment when Leina could have died. She shows her failure after failure, death after death. The destruction, as Rita forces her visions into Sayla's mind.
But before Rita finishes her display, something happens. Sayla's walls slam into place like bulkheads- an act of effort and force- as she closes herself from that space. From Rita's world of possibilities.
She can still hear her, faintly, more distant. Sayla breathes heavily, the act of sealing her heart from the ascended newtype requires exertion. She stumbles backward, sweat beading across her brow. She has to maintain the walls actively to keep herself out. To keep herself in the real world. She glares at the space where she knew Rita was, sitting on the Phenex's hand.
"How *dare* you!?" She yells, and it echoes around the hangar. "It doesn't matter why you did it! You *knew* Leina was Puru-1 and you hid it! You chose to put Leina through all that suffering, when you could have stopped it! You could have told *anyone* the truth, we could have stopped Murasame making things worse! We could have stopped them taking Akane and Rikka! Alouette, Banagher, Mineva, none of them would have had to go through that!" She's shaking with rage, as she yells, not entirely sure Rita would hear it.
"You came to Leina when she couldn't say no! When she was being /tortured and brainwashed/ because the Banshee 'had to be there'! You tried to make her commit suicide so that she could be like you, and you did the same to Banagher! Just because you say there was no other way doesn't make it right!"
There's so much pain there, rage at the woman who could knew, who could have acted- and didn't. "Even Yuliana tried to save her, but you- you took advantage of what Murasame did to her, and told her she had to do this! You took away any choice she had in the matter! And the fact that you think that's acceptable, that that's right..."
Sayla stares balefully at the haze where she thinks Rita is. "Your motivations don't mean a damn thing compared to the actions you took! You talk to me about possibility- but you picked your path when you accepted that these were acceptable sacrifices. After that... anything would be worth it, wouldn't it?"
<Pose Tracker> Rita Bernal has posed.
Sayla's walls go up. Rita looks surprised, closing her palm and banishing the visions of alternate possibilities. Why did Sayla shut her out? If she would've asked, Rita would've sent the visions away. The living are so sensitive about this sort of thing... It's confusing.
...that confusion only grows as Sayla begins to yell. Rita, still present, even if she cannot be seen, slowly tilts her head to one side. Why is Sayla reacting this way..? Rita just showed her there was no other way. If Rita had told someone about Leina, the Banshee would've been lost. Isn't it obvious?
Sayla trembles in her fury. Rita stays still. She can at least hear the other woman out. Slowly, the spirit lowers her hand, pressing it against the Phenex's palm. It's comforting, feeling the slight warmth Rita shares with her Gundam. A fluttering feeling, like a heartbeat, like beating wings...
Rita's eyes close. Sayla /is/ right. Rita's choices, her actions, when viewed from a singular perspective, are entirely unforgivable. Even Rita herself nearly fell into despair over where her path led, and the sacrifices required. Still, now, she can't bring herself to face Leina. Rita knows she doesn't deserve that friendship or sisterhood.
I know.
Sayla probably can't hear her. It doesn't matter -- Rita's words wouldn't reach Sayla now, anyway. That luminous light emanating from the spirit's eyes dims until Rita's green irises can be seen again.
There's nothing that can be done to make this right. I know that. And I'm so sorry.
Actions, motivations, possibilities. Sayla separates the three. Rita has long moved past that ability -- existing in this place where everything swirls into one. Her hand presses a little more onto the Phenex's, holding tight to her manifestation in the face of such overwhelming fury.
What else was there?
Of course Rita accepted these sacrifices. There was only one path. Alone, freshly dead, in the depths of space -- she hardly had others to check her decisions with. Bringing her other hand to her heart, the Heart of the Phenex thinks back to what she witnessed of Leina's time with Murasame.
I went to her when I could. I wish it could have been different, Sayla. But you saw, the same as I did, long ago.
Distantly, Rita's control of her image slips, ever so slightly. Her legs, dangling off the hand of her Gundam, cease their radiant glow, taking on a texture of scars and burned skin. As much as she can't understand Sayla's way of thinking, Rita can't deny the other woman's emotion.
<Pose Tracker> Sayla Mass has posed.
Sayla's walls aren't as perfect as they once were. Even fully closed, she can still hear Rita. Just barely, like it was when she would overhear the conversations in Amuro's dreams. But she's still there.
Her eyes harden again. "Isn't there? Or are you just a coward who refuses to try!?" Every time it feels like Sayla's anger has reached it peak, somehow she finds more. It oozes through the gaps in those mental walls. "You're not sorry- if you were, you'd at least try. Not just throw up your hands and say 'there's nothing I can do!'"
Sayla falls silent. What else was there? "Why didn't you just go to Michele, when she was old enough? Why did you go through everything at Metis? Without the Ra Mari II, so many more lives would have been have lost." Sayla's voice is not as loud. "Why was that battle necessary, when you could have prevented them fielding the Neo Zeong at all? Or did you not see it coming?"
If Rita's visions are infallible... then why were there these... mistakes?
"I don't accept that!" Sayla snaps, before Rita's finished speaking. "Everything you've shown me, you've shown me through your eyes! The same way Full Frontal only showed us the darkest parts of our history, flavoured through his vision, through Triple Zero! If you already decided the sacrifices were necessary- you wouldn't even be able to recognize a future where they weren't."
Fate is not something Sayla has ever believed in. "you're playing god with people's futures, trying to create miracles. That's not your damn right! You don't get to decide the costs of other people's lives, just because you gave up yours!"
She's still burning, as she glares at the spot where Rita still might be. "Leina nearly died to keep you fighting in that battle, and you say 'there's nothing I can do'? You're pathetic." Sayla turns, and starts to walk away. "Stay the hell away from my family, Bernal. Stay away from the people I love. We'll decide our own fates, not pick and choose from the possibilities you decide to show us."
<Pose Tracker> Rita Bernal has posed.
What is there to do?
Rita does sound, at lest, genuinely baffled. Sayla's anger strikes her, and the spirit winces -- losing more of her perfected image. Rita's arms are the next to go, the fair brilliance of her skin burning away to revel a terrible patina of scars.
Michele isn't a Newtype. Her heart was closed to me. And I wasn't dead, then. I was so limited as a living being. Metis...
Despair, genuine and corrupting, gnaws at Rita from within her soul. She shakes her head, as if to banish the feeling, as she has so many times before. It leaves her. But every time it gets a little harder. Cooling embers remain, reminding Rita of the fear she witnessed at the Banshee's launch, at the Narrative's embrace of the Neo Zeong II...
Metis didn't happen the way I saw it would. It was... always going to be a slaughter, but it wasn't meant to be /that/ way.
Rita's hair catches fire, burning away to a short ponytail. Anger, failure, grief... Rita can't let herself exist in this way. She isn't finished yet. As long as the Neo Zeong II exists, she must keep going, until it can be taken away. Until /she/ can take it away.
Sayla snaps, and Rita's green eyes lower. The older woman's words reveal a truth so few have realized -- one even Rita herself refused to believe, at first. Her manifestation is fully broken now, a spirit whose majesty has been seen for the illusion it is. Rita Bernal sits atop the Phenex's hand, scarred and exhausted, skin aflame with dancing, spiritual fire.
But it's too soon. She cannot accept this truth, or she'll lose herself. Rita stays quiet, gazing at Sayla with an unreadable look on her face. Rita must weather this. She's endured worse. This pain is only a temporary emotion.
I've only ever been after one Miracle. And it's almost time. Then, all of this can finally, finally, come to an end.
This is the way it has to be. Rita reassures herself of this, again and again. There was no other path. If she had to play as a god, so be it. If she had to decide the worth and cost of other lives, so be it.
Sayla needs to hate her. There isn't any other way. Rita brings her hands together in her lap, gazing hard at the living woman.
Thank you, Sayla Mass, for saving Michele from that place. I will always be grateful for that. Maybe, in another life--
It doesn't matter. It never could've been. Green eyes watch Sayla begin to leave. Rita has nothing to offer her now. Perhaps she never has had anything. Sayla has never been one for Miracles, after all.
If you do not wish it, you will not see me again. Goodbye.
Rita watches, long after Sayla has left the hangar.
Eventually, the Phenex returns to its standby position. Rita floats up to the Gundam's head, pressing her forehead against the facial armor of her partner. They're not wrong. They're not. They had no other choice. It's easy for someone to judge now that they're on the other side of the Unicorn's Miracle, now that everyone has been saved. If Sayla was put in Rita's place, she would've done the same thing.
Flickering blue flame trails down Rita's cheeks. She vanishes from the Phenex, reappearing next to an unconscious Jona once more.
I don't care. I don't. I'd do it again, so I could keep you alive. So I could protect this world.
Jona's hand rests outside the blanket, close to the edge of the bed. Rita can't bring herself to reach out to it. Burning tears scorch a path down her face, leaving the illusion of cracks in Rita's spiritual form.
I'd do it all again. Whatever it takes.