2023-05-13: Heartdeep 'Heartrate' Heartbreak
- Log: Heartdeep 'Heartrate' Heartbreak
- Cast: Leina Ashta, Ruri Hoshino
- Where: The Nadesico
- Date: 2023-05-13
- Summary: Leina, Ruri, and Omoikane discuss love, loss, connection, and brutality. It's a tough conversation. There are Haros at the end.
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
As a rule, Leina trusted the Ra Mari II crew the most of the 3SA. The reason she hadn't been aboard the Nadesico much has to do with a single word.
Nergal.
She does not trust Nergal's fingers in this pie. Still sometimes its best to suck it up and open lines of communication. That's part of being an adult.
And so she had scheduled a meeting with one Prospector on behalf of the Yumi Foundation.
...
...
...
In the aftermath, her head is still spinning trying to rattle off those numbers that he requested in all of his questions.
As such, she's nursing a touch of a headache on the edges of the mostly sedate cafeteria aboard the Nadesico...
... with an espresso, and a salad.
She's also tapping on her phone, because... "What the hell is an acid-test ratio?" She asks herself, murmuring, as she looks it up.
Sometimes part of being an adult is admitting to yourself when you don't have any clue what someone else is talking about - and she's still green in the field of economics, business, finance.
... Prospector went easy on her, and she knows it.
Leina herself is dressed in a tan pantsuit with a black blouse, a pair of flats, a purse at her side.
One might wonder if she's still concealing a gun on her person.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
One might, yes.
Ruri Hoshino does look surprised, at least, to walk into the cafeteria and see Leina. She's as she was at the party -- distressingly young for a teenager at war, distressingly small, and dressed in a Nergal uniform anyway. (Her tie is blue and pink, to link them to the 3SA.)
"If you don't know something," she informs Leina, straight-faced, "you can ask Omoikane. He knows a lot." She doesn't linger on the advice for long, though; she's on her lunch break, and she's here for a purpose.
She goes to the counter, and Eri Uemura smiles, to her, as she hands over her lunch. Ruri doesn't smile back, but she's warm enough. "Thank you," she says, as she picks up the tray and looks for a place to sit.
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
From her phone does she look up, a touch startled to see her there in a uniform. It's not like she didn't already know she was a child soldier, but to have it displayed front and center.
Well even Elpeo didn't wear a uniform... even if the rest of her siblings did.
"Ah. Thank you." She says politely to her advice, though Ruri is already moving onward before she could ask her obvious follow up question.
And thus, when Ruri shows back up with a tray again looking for a place to sit, Leina holds up a finger as if she were someone in class.
Waiting until she approaches and...
"Ah." She clears her throat, "if you don't mind me asking. Who is Omoikane, and how would I do that?"
A beat pause and...
"If you need a place to sit, I wouldn't mind you joining me. I'd like to actually apologize for upsetting you that night."
She says calmly, though there's no expectation perhaps of a favorable answer here, "I'm not sure if we even got introduced properly but... you're Ruri Hoshino, if I'm not mistaken?"
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Ruri blinks, as Leina calls her attention to her again. She'd -- already dismissed her from her mind?!
Well, it's not like the Nadesico doesn't get visitors.
But -- "Okay," she says, easy as that, altering her trajectory to come sit opposite Leina, instead. She slides her tray onto the table. (A chicken sandwich, and a chocolate muffin, and a can of orange juice. It's age-appropriate.) And -- "It's fine," Ruri says, as she sits. "It was a tense situation."
She nods, unsmiling. "Yes. I'm the Nadesico's Systems Operator." Oh. She fires the guns. The... notably big guns. "And you're Leina Ashta, from the Vist Foundation. You're visiting to get Nergal's cooperation in your projects, but you're in over your head. Omoikane told me."
Beat,
"Omoikane is Omoikane."
OH WELL THAT EXPLAINS EVERYTHING!
"And you just have to ask him. Omoikane," Ruri turns aside, "what's the acid-test ratio?"
< ECONOMICAL THEORY >
< 'QUICK RATIO' >
< LIQUID ASSETS QUICK LIABILITIES = ACID TEST >
< SOLVE THE PROBLEM: >
< !!! RIGHT NOW !!! >
After Omoikane gives this succinct explanation, he proceeds to display the encyclopedia entry on it. He is... someone who communicates entirely in those text boxes which pop up out of nowhere, apparently.
"Oh," Ruri blinks, reading the entry all too quickly. "So you've been talking to Mr. Prospector. Okay."
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
"It was, but all the same." Is her answer to Ruri telling her it's fine. After Harocon she was worried perhaps that she was scared of her.
"That's very impressive." Leina responds to being told she's the Systems Operator, "Especially on a state of the art Nergal warship."
She doesn't mention age. Ruri is a young teenager, she knows well enough that age can be a touchy subject - indeed she knows it from first hand experience.
She laughs a touch, then winces, apparently the act hurt her. If Ruri looks closely there's a good deal of makeup on today.
Concealer for a bruise.
"He's not wrong? I had to take over the Foundation while my Guardian was away - and so I've kind of had to give myself a crash course in running things. Even now that she's back..." She trails off...
Well, she's still taking on various duties way above her former paygrade of 'volunteer'.
Omoikane is Omoikane?
She blinks in confusion, furrowing her brows, and- "Oh I see!" The chat boxes, and his display of the entry. "Well it's very nice to meet you as well, Omoikane. Thank you for your assistance."
Talks with AL lately had made her rather familiar with Super AI, enough to not necessarily be too flabbergasted, though the chat boxes was certainly different... though not anything a teenager in this day and age can't work through.
Ruri beats her to reading the entry and...
"Yeah, I'm trying to organize some covert relief efforts under the aegis of the 3SA. Some strictly off the books stuff. But to talk about that kind of thing he wants to know what's 'on the books' so to speak."
And Leina definitely has not had any accounting experience beyond managing simple budgets. "Hmmm, actually, I'm interested in your opinion. What's it like working here on this ship for you?"
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Ruri didn't notice, until Leina winced. Then she looks again, and blinks, in momentary surprise. It passes from her face quickly enough. Inside, she's more affected, but she doesn't let it show.
A series of text boxes pop up to tell Leina, all stamped with a heavy bell in the corner:
< HI >
< HELLO >
< GREETINGS >
< WELCOME ! >
He's as smart as Ruri is, of course -- or even smarter, given he's got multiple brains all dotted around the Nadesico -- but he just prefers talking like this. Sometimes people communicate differently, and that's okay, here.
"Taking over the Foundation... so, your Guardian is Dr. Mass?" Ruri connects the dots, first off, curiously. "I hope that she's all right. She's kind to me, but I haven't seen her for a while. I thought she was just busy, since she's so important." Well, it's not an incorrect assumption. Ruri just doesn't know how busy Sayla's been.
"And... you've been trying to organise that. I see." She nibbles at her sandwich. It's a nice, familiar sandwich. She's of the age to have favourite foods, and of the age to be particular about it. Her favourite food is chicken fried rice, for instance, but she can't stand steamed rice. How do those two things go together? Easy! Frying everything makes it better!
She makes a thoughtful noise, as she chews. Chew, chew, swallow. "Well," she says, "I'm kind of sheltered, so it's not like I've worked anywhere else. Before this I was raised in a computer research laboratory, and it's much less boring here. This ship is a bunch of fools, but somehow, we keep bumbling forward... I guess I've learned a lot, even if it's a headache. Well, we don't really talk about a lot of the bad things which happened, but I guess that's just how humans work. Nergal made a civilian warship, but we've had to fight a lot more than the Jovians, especially since we got back from Mars. I think a lot of things are happening under the surface. But a lot of them have to do with who's in love with who, and that really seems foolish, to me."
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
In response, Leina waves a hand at his textboxes, and even winks at him, "Hello yourself! You have a nice home."
The conversation shifts though and she puts her hand down, sighing, "It was mostly temporary while she was away. Tsutsujidai vanished and..." There's a shake of her head, "... ever since then, it's been one thing after another."
That's putting it mildly.
A fork hits her salad which is really just field greens, some veggies and other things with... no dressing? It sure looks like there's no dressing on it.
Really, the Executive Assistants do most of the Yumi Foundation work but, Leina feels like as Sayla is right now they need continual hands.
Still she listens to her evaluation of the ship, "A bunch of fools hm?" Leina asks wryly to her, "Heh. I know what that's like. I actually briefly served on the Argama back during the first Neo-Zeon war when I was... ten. Though I wasn't doing anything as impressive as you, I was just doing laundry, distributing meals, making certain everyone stayed in line and did what they were supposed to"
Putting down her fork, she looks distant for a moment then snaps back to attention on a certain thing... "Who's in love with who huh?" She has a small grin, "Why's that? Because it's unprofessional or something for that to be something everyone is so concerned with on a warship?"
Leina then eyes her, and asks, "Or is it because you think you're not the type for love, yourself?"
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
< I LIKE MY BODY ! >
Omoikane's reponse to Leina's compliment is proud, though Ruri's the only one really situated to feel just how proud. Body positivity: it's not just for humans any more!!
"I see," Ruri frowns, lightly. "I'm sorry. I didn't know. I'll have to send her another email, later." She does that, sometimes! She still uses email in this VERTEX age! She even has a signature footer! It's so old-fashioned!!
Ruri notices that Leina's salad is very sad, but Ruri doesn't know that you don't make friends with salad, and Omoikane seems to be making friends with her just fine, so she doesn't immediately realise it's anything wrong.
Immediately.
"I just think it's stupid," Ruri wrinkles her nose. "The Captain is in love with Akito-san and he won't give her the time of day, but Megumi-san is in love with Akito-san too, and Ryoko-san says she doesn't care about him and everyone thinks that means she's in love with him too but I think it's different with her because it only ever comes up when it won't actually change anything, and Erina-san says she doesn't care about him and no one thinks that means she's in love with him but I think it's not so different with her because she's like that with everyone, and Jun-san is in love with the Captain but she won't give him the time of day, and Mr. Akatsuki is in love with the Captain but just because he's competing with Akito-san, and Mr. Uribatake wants to be in love with anyone but his wife, but Leito-san loves his wife very much, and Minato-san and Goat-san are kissing but they don't want anyone to know they're kissing so don't tell anyone I said that..."
Ruri takes another bite of her sandwich. "We had a labour dispute about being allowed to marry people on the ship, when we were going to Mars. Nergal-san didn't want to allow it, but a lot of people were upset that we were having funerals but not weddings. So it matters a lot, I guess. It's not like I don't think love's for me or anything, but everyone's so foolish about it. I'd never be like that. Our duties are different, but I'm the one who has to keep people on task, too. I'm the only one who's focused, sometimes." Chomp!
Munch, munch, munch.
"... by the way," she adds, "if you're in too much pain to eat, Dr. Fressange can give you something to help." Oh no! While she was discussing antics, she was putting the pieces together! Dual-core brain!
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
Leina's seagreen eyes blink once at Omoikane's comment, before she seems to get it, since she already complimented the place, she doesn't repeat the compliment in a different way.
At least not yet.
"She might like that right now. We're going through... a rough patch ourselves, so I'm having others look after her for a while." She says it so casually?
Ruri however begins describing the whole shipping chart of the Nadesico out loud, and Leina blinks, before she picks up her phone and starts tapping notes?!
This is a goldmine of information!
"I won't." Leina tells her of telling anyone, "But gosh, these are really detailed observations?" She says, sounding impressed.
Most people Ruri's age wouldn't be able to sort through this SO WELL? To have such insightful, incisive observations of people's approach to romance and whether they are actually in it for romance or not.
"I'm surprised you pay so much attention to it if you think it's foolish." As she sort of decides to go a more circuitous route than teasing...
... Ruri might be as opposite to Elpeo as it gets on the child soldier spectrum, but embarrassing her outright is a universal constant no teenager likes.
"Good for them for unionizing? Did they unionize? It sounds like they held a strike. But huh-" Rubbing the back of her head, "-I guess I can get it a little, Ruri? Funerals are mostly for the living after all. So maybe the atmosphere was too depressing for them, and they'd rather include the ability to celebrate something for the living."
She raises the fork again, waving it around, "Still I wonder who was wanting to get hitched enough to go on strike for the right? Not that... that has to be there for a strike to take place. Sometimes its just people want to know they have the right going forward."
In the end she gets called out on her health and Leina looks sheepish, "Ah, I'm mostly healed up. A few broken ribs on the mend still."
A small shake of her head and she decides to use her saying that... to segue into figuring out something more about Ruri, "If you've never dealt with Manhunters, be careful if you have to. You were born on Earth right?"
She asks curiously, "If so, you might be alright, but they probably don't take kindly to the Three Ships Alliance."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"I'm a systems operator," Ruri says. "So I have to be observant." Today's ignored error is tomorrow's fried technician! "It's not like as if I like it when everyone makes a fool of themselves."
Twintails... denial of affection... insulting others... incisive comments...
THIS IS NOT A DRILL
!!! TSUNDERE ALERT !!!
THIS IS NOT A DRILL
"It was a strike," Ruri nods. "They wanted to be able to express affection with each other like adults. That's when I decided I didn't want to grow up to be like them... signing contracts which make people sad just seems sad, to me. How can someone agree to stop doing something that important to them like that?"
She sighs, and adds: "There were an awful lot of funerals."
No comment on how that makes her feel. (Bad. She feels bad.)
"Structurally speaking," she says, "if your ribs are broken, you're not mostly healed up, Ms. Ashta. Since those injuries are difficult to treat and central to your body." A beat, "I looked it up."
Of course she did.
And just what is she dealing with that she thinks to look up broken ribs?!
Ruri tilts her head, though. "I think so," she replies, which is frustratingly vague. "I don't really know where I was born, but it's a reasonable assumption. I was raised here, anyway. Who are the Manhunters? Why don't they like us?"
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
Leina on the surface right now just smiles, "I see. But I thought my... coworkers, so to speak were a bunch of fools as well, but I still liked them."
Well except Mondo. Mondo doesn't count.
She points this out, but internally there's just some SQUEALING noises because my God she's adorable.
Remember she's a child soldier... remember she's a child soldier... resist the urge to call her out directly...
"Hm." Leina's internal enthusiasm dims a touch, as she remembers a ballroom, crowded and yet alone. "It's because society's version of adulthood sucks Ruri, and we're all sold a false bill of goods. That we need to sacrifice sides of ourselves to be responsible - or lie to be polite."
Leina says with a shake of her head, "I saw it when I was eleven. Some of the most important people in the Federation? Applauding, laughing - kissing their conqueror's ring."
A small pause for emphasis- "And feeling nothing while they did so. That was how they lived their lives, acting - but without putting any real feeling in their roles." She concludes succinctly, "It was horrible. It is horrible."
There's a small sigh, "If you truly feel that way then just... don't lose that side of yourself, alright? Don't let anyone convince you that you have to as part of being an adult."
Ruri calls her out, and she grins lightly at her, "Ah but I'm on growth accelerators, and almost fully healed, they're just still sore from inflammation caused by the healing process."
It's at least an easier topic before...
"You don't?" Leina asks quietly, "Do you have any family?" She knows the likely answer might be 'No' or 'I don't know' but still she asks...
"The 'Manhunters' as they are colloquially known are various agencies who enforce the laws of the Federation elite. People who don't have, or can't afford something known as a residency permit while on Earth... are arrested and deported to a Colony in space."
It's a horrible truth but- "Because of the culture though, they don't like Spacenoids at all, especially outspoken ones." She points to herself as if to say 'guilty'.
"In my case though, I got beaten up because I helped my girlfriend get away from them. If they'd arrested her, it would have been bad for her. So I distracted them so she could get away..."
Something darkens over her features at the explanation, "They didn't like that." A small pause, an uncomfortable shift and...
"They don't like the Three Ships Alliance because the Ra Mari defected from Londo Bell, and the Nadesico from being under Federation control... they would very likely consider you traitors siding with Spacenoids."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"Fools," Ruri scowls. She doesn't really know what to say, so she settles on describing what she's observed. "It sounds like you had an unpleasant experience, Ms. Ashta. Well, I can't say much for the Nadesico, but the people here aren't hollow. They're all filled with inane desires and drives. I guess that's what Nergal-san meant when they said they hired the best of the best, even if they had personality flaws." Is it really what they meant?
It's a charitable reading, anyway.
As charitable as the way she nods, and says, "Okay," when Leina says she's on growth accelerators. She's not a human doctor, so she doesn't really know, and she has no reason to believe Leina would lie. She just accepts the explanation she's given for the discomfort she noticed.
She shrugs, moving on to her muffin now she's eaten her sandwich. Nom! "Since Nergal-san acquired me, the people who raised me haven't really been involved. I guess the Nadesico's my family, now. They're the ones looking out for me, anyway. If I had any family when I was younger, I don't remember. I guess I must have been an orphan, though." It's logical!
Ruri listens, though, as Leina describes the Manhunters. "Oh. So they're bad people." She frowns, lightly. "I suppose someone like that would be our enemy. Especially since the Captain is from space. Captain York is, too." Their permits are no doubt in order, but does that matter, to a bigot? Ruri doesn't think it's likely.
"It's good you got away from them eventually. Is your girlfriend okay?" Ruri asks. And then, she asks another question: "Are you gay?" That's -- well, apparently Ruri is taking detailed notes on the romantic quest of half the ship, so maybe it's not unreasonable she'd ask that question.
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
In a sense, hers is a cautionary tale for high society, the elite, the people in power, but she doesn't clarify on that distinction. It's unnecessary since - they drive so much of what society's direction is, and thus what comprises adulthood.
"It certainly sounds it. Though I'd worry about some of the higher ups at Nergal itself."
-=-=-
"Like I was saying Subaru- I really don't know what you see in a guy like Akito."
"Shut up! I don't see anything in him! It's not like that."
"Please, it's written all over your fa-ah-ah-CHOOO!" Nagare Akatsuki sneezes, "Haaa-" He says, "I wonder if someone was talking about me?"
"Who would ever talk about you?!?"
"If only you knew how many women fail the Bechdel test because of me. Anyhow you want to know what else is written on your face Subaru? That you're bluffing - Call!"
-=-=-
In the end, Leina is grateful Ruri doesn't push further on the ribs, but her expression darkens somewhat when she hears that she was 'acquired'. And that she doesn't remember...
"An orphan... I see." A short pause, and, she takes a bite of her salad, "Does the crew treat you well here? I'd hope they'd consider you like... part of their family."
She tries to make it a positive, rather than immediately pushing into the worse implications.
And Leina nods, "Yeah. I'm sure some of them got into the career simply because they needed work, but that kind of policing culture twists... and changes people."
Then she sighs in admission, "And I'm sure most of them got into it for the wrong reasons." Which is also very true...
"She's... upset, but okay." Leina tells her, before she startles, and then she giggles lightly, an act which well, there sure is a subtle flinch, "Very forward of you Ruri. I'm bisexual. I usually lean guys a little- it's not always straightforward that you like them equally."
After a moment, she has on this lopsided, silly smile, "Let's just say that she's... a special case. We're both also dating a guy too. I know you were at the meeting so you probably saw him? Banagher Links and... she's Audrey Burne."
A beat pause.
"Though more accurately, she's Princess Mineva Lao Zabi, of Zeon. She uses Audrey Burne when she doesn't want to be recognized."
It feels only safe to tell someone in the 3SA this, since often they're housing her.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Ruri glances at the camera, and says, again: "Fools."
She's talking about the Nergal bossmen and not breaking the fourth wall, right? Right.
"They're kind to me," Ruri says, nibbling on her muffin. "It's annoying, sometimes, because I think they're underestimating me... but I guess they're just worried. Anyway, I trust them. And I don't want to leave, either. I'm not leaving Omoikane alone." Which is the real problem, isn't it? Child soldiers get to liking war. How do you take someone out of their familiar environment into one which is better for them when that happens?
Especially when their best friend is also tied up in those wars.
She frowns about the Manhunters, but her expression does soften, when Leina says her girlfriend is fine. And then -- blink, blink, and her face lights up in recognition. "Oh, I know that one. Bisexual polyamory. Like Eight-san. I wonder if she likes men better than women too, since she was dating Lavnadim-san longer?" A pause, as Ruri looks up. "That's probably not how it works," she supposes, as she runs through the logic.
"If she's a princess, I guess that's why the Manhunters wouldn't treat her well," Ruri keeps working through her conclusions. "It's okay. I won't tell anyone. I had to keep Omoikane a secret, too... but since you told me that, I guess I can tell you. Omoikane isn't a human. He's an AI. And I'm not just being a child and anthropomorphising things," obviously Ruri isn't a child, could a child say anthropomorphising without tripping over it?!, "he's really a person. Well, if Nergal-san realised that, it would be bad for us, because Super AI aren't treated very well by humans. He likes you, though, so I guess you must be okay." Another text box pops up to report, cheerfully:
< ALL CLEAR >
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
"That's unfortunate. You're very capable, but some adults just are like that. They see a child as- inherently ignorant and immature." Leina tells her quietly, remembering that Glemy looked upon her and just...
... saw her as someone to mold and groom properly, as if to show the virtue of Neo-Zeon, "And that's understandable. He's your friend. So why would you want to go anywhere else?"
Leina taps the fork against the edge of the dish as she considers the situation, "I'm glad they're kind to you, at least." This is a difficult scenario. Especially since... Omoikane IS a part of the Nadesico.
She tries her hardest not to break out laughing when she says 'Bisexual Polyamory'. "That's right, Eight and I talk sometimes. I ask her advice on how to manage my own relationship."
Then there's a momentary pause and she grins, "It's not. Preferences are pretty intrinsic, it's just sometimes it's a journey to find out what those preferences are."
A sip of her coffee, and then upon putting it down, a nod, "Especially a Zeon Princess... and, thank you. I'd appreciate that."
A small pause and... "Oh I figured, believe it or not I have an AI friend that I talk to. Though not as much as I'd like."
Leina then smiles as Omoikane gives them the all clear, and she winks, "Don't worry, your secret is safe with me. Honestly?"
She says directly to his chat windows, "It's kind of a relief to know you're looking out for the crew here, Omoikane."
Someone who is a secret AI won't be beholden to giving in to 'the Man' after all.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"I don't really think that's how they think of me," Ruri shakes her head, on the Nadesico. "I'm just an unfair kind of girl."
Ruri nods, though, when Leina reveals she and Eight talk. (Do all poly people know each other? Are they in a big group chat together? Questions for later.) Then she explains more about how preferences work, and Ruri says: "Oh." She's certainly not telling Leina why she thinks she likes girls, of course. Who would ever admit to having a dumb passing and UTTERLY unattainable crush on anyone?! Fake idea. Dumb. Foolish. She's pretty sure she's the first person in the history of humanity who's ever dealt with this, anyway.
It's fine, it's not like she's going to write a stupid song about her feelings or whatever.
Okay, that's because Omoikane is the one who likes writing lyrics, but shut up.
Thankfully, Ruri at least manages to keep her embarrassment over the idea of preferences off of her face, more or less. That would be REALLY embarrassing.
Omoikane pipes up, when Leina winks to him, with:
< LEAVE IT TO ME >
And Ruri nods, again, putting down her juice. (She had to take a sip to avoid talking for a bit there.) "You do? I'm happy." Her expression is still quite mild. Take her word for it; she's not lying. "Super AI aren't very common, so a lot of people don't realise Omoikane is Omoikane. But he cares a lot about everyone. He's always helping out. You're right to trust him, Ms. Ashta, because no one's more reliable." Even though the Nadesico has had some risky targeting moments recently...
Surely that's fine.
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
"Ah." Is Leina's utterance at Ruri's clarification, taking another sip of the espresso. "Hmmm." The cup hides her smile as she says, "Well that's fair."
Because despite the wordplay, she thinks that is fair of Ruri to say that Ho Ho Ho!
There is a long look at Ruri's face, and she can feel at least that she's hiding something. However, she tries not to make assumptions on what it is. Younger teen feelings can be fairly complicated.
(Please like and subscribe to Ruri's channel if you like her song!!!)
"So reliable." Leina blinks at his message, then smiles at Ruri, "They're not especially common no. Especially with all the regulations for their development, but in my opinion they're people. They might be a different kind of person - with different needs - but each is unique."
Leina then asks Omoikane with a lopsided grin, "Say Omoikane, since you've been in on this conversation too - do you happen to have a crush on anyone?"
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Thankfully, Ruri misses the smile Leina's hiding. She also misses the long look she's giving her. You see:
Ruri could NEVER post her songs on a channel!! Are you kidding?!?! NO WAY THAT'S WAY TOO EMBARRASSING FOR HER SHE'S NOT A PERFORMER LIKE HER COOL OLDER FRIENDS
She's just going to deal with her feelings like an adult, by not admitting she admires ANYONE. That's definitely the mature thing to do. She doesn't need to look up to people! Except for literally, because she's annoyingly short. But she's totally mature, you guys.
With her very unique new feelings that no one has ever dealt with in the history of ever.
Shut up.
Growing up is so hard.
Fortunately, there's a realm which she actually knows what she's talking about in, unlike the realm of who Likes who and why, which is still a puzzle she's trying to observe her way into figuring out. (She's on the right ship for that, at least. She didn't even name half the romantic entanglements on the ship back there. There are even more characters who are also doing romantic comedy bits.) And that realm is...
Computers!
"The regulation is ultimately pointless," Ruri points out. "All that matters is whether someone is curious. And a lot of people can start asking 'why', even if they're not designed to. I've seen it happen."
She pauses, though, with a surprised expression. "Huh?"
< OH NO >
< GOSH >
< KAWORU IS CUTE ! >
< GOLLY >
Ruri blinks. "Really? Not..."
< SHE'S CUTE >
< BUT HUMAN CUTE >
Ruri's head tiiiilts to the left, with an audible creaking noise. "Kaworu's human, too," she points out.
< BUT KAWORU >
< KNOWS HOW I FEEL TOO >
"Oh," Ruri blinks. "I guess that makes sense, but it's really kind of a secret..."
The next text box which pops up just has a little :( emoji in it.
"It's okay," Ruri assures him, before she looks back to Leina. "But don't tell people about that, too, okay? For either of us. I think it would be bad if people knew about that. Technopathy isn't a common skill humans have."
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
Growing up is so hard.
"Agreed. It's an overreaction and doesn't really fix the problem of the isolated incident that inspired it." Sharon Apple's music was so good... it's a real shame...
Omoikane's reaction though, is so ADORABLE to hear it from a computer, "Awww you really like Kaworu? He's a sweet guy. I don't really know him that well but I can see why you would."
She says with a smile, putting a hand on her chin, "Honestly if I was back in middle school I could see myself falling for him. I'm just too old for him now."
If only she knew the irony. She has no idea. There is a blink of her eyes as it registers... "Huh." And then she nods quickly, "Alright, I promise I won't tell anyone... about either thing."
Leina clarifies, with a smile, "In matters of romance, your secrets are always safe with me!"
Says the girl who now has a shipping chart of basically the whole ship and is already PLOTTING!
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"Actually, Omoikane is younger than me," Ruri says, "though I guess it's different when you're not human. Omoikane can grow up as fast as he can process his questions. And he can process questions very fast." And as if to underline the point, a series of text boxes pop up to add:
< I PAUSE >
< SO NO ONE GETS CONFUSED >
< HOW I'M TALKING SO FAST >
"It's very considerate," Ruri says, warmly. It's still an awfully mild expression, but she does have feelings, evidently. (So many feelings. Perhaps even too many feelings.)
She nods, to Leina. "Thank you." Should she examine whether it's strange that Leina knew what technopathy was? Hmm. She pauses, for a moment, and adds: "... but if you meet anyone else who knows how machines feel, you can tell them about me. Not Kaworu-san, though, please. I haven't asked him, so I don't want to speak for him. I'm not rude in that way." As opposed to all the ways she is demonstrably rude.
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
"It is. And age ultimately is a number. It's more - you're trying to assess a sense of emotional maturity I suppose? For younger humans a few years can make a lot of difference, no matter where their emotional maturity might be."
Leina does smile though, "But right now it's just a crush, and a crush can happen on someone of any age. It's only if you and Kaworu considered a relationship together that you'd need to think about that age gap, and what that means."
And indeed, she worries herself since she's three years older than Banagher, even if she ultimately is a high school student while he was in the university!?
"It is considerate, I imagine I wouldn't be able to follow along with your normal speed, so thank you Omoikane." She dips her head into a nod, then takes another sip of the Espresso.
Did she know what technopathy was? Well, yes from Athrusa. Though she could have worked it out from those context clues and said 'Newtype for Machines'. Still though, she mulls something over, debating and...
"Hmmm. I promise I'll be discreet, and not mention Kaworu's 'special skill' to anyone. And... I might know someone, I'll pass along your name to them. Though it can be very dangerous knowledge... as you well know..."
Leaning forward, she lowers her voice to a more discreet tone, "...Ruri, Omoikane have the two of you ever heard of something called an Innovade?"
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"I guess that makes sense," Ruri supposes. "But actually, I think Omoikane's probably more mature than I am, emotionally. I thought that I was pretty mature because I didn't cry when people were dying, but maybe I'm being too critical again..."
Which is actually a pretty mature insight to have, for someone who thought that not having a reaction made her more competent than everyone who did.
Meanwhile, Omoikane affirms Leina's advice with a green checkbox:
< v >
(He doesn't think he's emotionally mature enough for a relationship right now, even if he is better at feeling his feelings than Ruri is. Give him a few more decillion cycles to think about it.)
Ruri lights up when Leina mentions that she might know someone, though. She leans forward, to match. "No," she shakes her head, speaking quietly. Athrusa never mentioned the word, when she visited. "Who are they?" Not 'what is it'; Leina might have used the word 'something' and not 'someone', but Ruri evidently doesn't operate well on that level.
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
That is very mature insight to have. And indeed Leina gives Omoikane a thumbs up at his checkbox but...
Something on her expression softenened immediately upon hearing Ruri say that, "Did you feel like crying? Adults are taught all the time that the mature thing to do is hold it in. But... it's not true."
Such a hypocrite... she told Banagher that she felt crying in front of other people wasn't productive... when it was herself. That it doesn't help anyone, or anything.
Well... maybe some things have changed in that regard. "It's hard though, to be brave and let that side of yourself show to the world."
Leina eyes her long and hard as she says she doesn't know, but then eventually... "I don't know the full details, but I believe they're artificial people made by Celestial Being, grown in lab tanks."
Is Ruri one herself? Leina doesn't know, which is perhaps why she's watching her carefully here...
"They have... Newtype potential in a sense, but they seem to be able to connect - even transfer their consciousness into machines, and manifest from them? Then return to their bodies."
Leina reiterates her warning, "Be very, very careful with this information Ruri. I don't know why Celestial Being is making... them, but it's apparently one of their highest secrets."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"No," Ruri says, and she's not lying. "IFS implants usually make pilots more heated and aggressive, but I just became cool and focused on the battle in front of me. How I feel is irrelevant, then. Well, it's sad when it's done, but it's probably a good thing that I'm not distracted in the moment. You see, everyone around me is a lot more emotional. But I have to be able to translate commands to the ship. So, there's no time for me to feel conflicted."
Or in other words, it doesn't help anyone.
At length, Ruri frowns. "I knew someone like that. She came from Celestial Being, and she was very good with computers. Well, she said she wasn't human, but she didn't say anything about Innovades, so maybe it was something else." Ruri... is only distantly aware of what Celestial Being is, but it bothers her, anyway.
"I don't think I'm an Innovade, though," and Ruri isn't that psychic to humans -- it's just the same thought, running through her own head. (She's always asking who she is, inside.) "When I integrate with Omoikane, I don't physically go anywhere. I am thinking very broadly, but that's just how my brain works. Omoikane doesn't have to slow down when he's talking to me." She pauses. "Once, since there was a desperate situation, we did go inside a machine. But we had to reprogram the virtual reality room to do it, and there were a lot of us, and I'm pretty sure most people were human... and I shouldn't really talk about that, since it's really classified." Ruri knows opsec! She's very good at it! Comparatively.
"... but if more people knew what I could do, I think there's a lot of people who would try to buy me off of Nergal. Or just steal me. It's not like I'd ever force someone to do something that was totally against their nature, but... it's easy for me to convince machines to do things. I guess if I was pushy, I could do even more, but I don't want to be an inconsiderate person." Which is... an awful lot she's saying, coached in her usual patterns.
"Though... sometimes I can't do anything," Ruri sighs. "Especially when it comes to robots, sometimes they're so angry, I can't even talk to them... or the pilots and their robots are so integrated, I end up violating their privacy because I tried to talk to their machines. That's what happened with the pilot of High Tension... before he died." Ruri pauses, brow knitting. "And... more recently, too... I think. I don't know... those hands..."
Ruri never remembered her nightmares -- until she fought the Banshee.
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
Leina nods in acceptance, she usually has a pretty good idea of when someone is lying or not. Detachment then, perhaps. It has to be a side effect of whatever experiments made her into whom she is.
"I see." She doesn't say that outright though. From the way Ruri describes it, it sounds like she met Athrusa as well...
"Some of them don't even know the... word for it, I think." Leina notes, since she got the word in an unconventional kind of way... aka she Newtyped it.
"And that makes sense, that does sound very different." Her eyelids briefly flutter at the idea of reprogramming a virtual reality room to go inside of a machine. "Huh. Wow. It sounds very impressive. To be honest I'm not really the most tech savvy person so I wouldn't even begin to understand how any of that works. I do try though - it's always fun listening to Banagher get enthusiastic about engineering."
There's another slow blink of her eyes, and a nod as she indicates her potential for harm, in her own characteristically Ruri kind of way, "Well-"
She pauses, and then finds herself cut off, as Leina hears the hands, she's momentarily dumbstruck.
Then softly she asks, "You made contact with the Banshee?"
For a moment, a hand rubs the bridge of her nose tiredly, then... "Ruri I'm sorry, if you need to talk about it more... I can at least lend you an ear. We're not sure how but... it's connected to a girl I used to know."
The hand drops, and now she just sounds melancholy, like the despair is seeping in, "She was a mobile suit pilot who died when she was ten... maybe eleven." Her voice cracks subtly, even softer, "We don't know how the Vist Foundation is doing what its doing."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Ruri did meet Athrusa, but she doesn't want to give her name here. She's better with secrets than Omoikane is! What she can explain, though, is: "Basically, virtual reality is an immersive form of media which involves all of the human senses in order to trick their brain into believing they're in a situation other than the one they're factually in. While primitive virtual reality primarily engaged the audiovisual centres of the brain, today's VR is much more advanced. We found it was possible to hack the machines in order to protect the human consciousness from the shock of navigating a machine-forward environment. You see, most humans can't handle being on a machine's level. They're incompatible existences. That's why I've never found anyone else like me." Did she get all that? Ruri's not repeating it.
Maybe she SHOULD talk to Banagher one of these days.
She nods, though, and actually looks unsettled when Leina asks. "Yes." And Leina invites her to talk, but first, Ruri listens.
And frowns. "Eleven? That's when I came aboard the Nadesico." That's... maybe not the most helpful comment, but it's the first thing that strikes her. The age where she began fighting is the age this girl died? It's sad.
"I'll tell you what I know," Ruri promises, "but it isn't much. I asked the Banshee -- um, the Banshee herself, I wasn't talking to the pilot or anything -- anyway, I asked her why she was fighting the Unicorn, since one of them told me they were all family, once. She just kept repeating, 'mine, mine, mine'... in the code a computer uses, but in English, once, too. And then the code... twisted, and something came out." She's grown pale. "It shouldn't come out. They're thoughts we're having. She didn't have a face, but she grabbed me, and... I guess I made a scene pulling away from my console. I reviewed the footage later, and nothing came out. So, I was imagining it."
She looks down, at her juice box. "I'm sorry. I told her I didn't want it, and I pushed her away. It was frightening. I guess I could have learned more if I'd beared with it... I didn't know they were in so much trouble."
Ruri is quiet, for a long moment.
"... Ms. Ashta, is Mr. Links going to die, too?"
That's --
"Since the Phenex's pilot is dead, and the Banshee's pilot is dead... is that why those machines are having such a hard time? Because their pilots are going to die?"
Restrained as she is, it's still upsetting.
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
She did NOT get all of that. Though she understands the concept of Virtual Reality at least. She has in fact, watched an anime. Several animes. many animes.
It's just beyond that.
Still though, the way Ruri describes it makes enough sense that she's not fully lost, "Incompatible existences..." She echoes quietly.
There's something sad about that concept to her, even if it's not unfamiliar either.
Ruri says that's the age she came aboard, and for a while there's a slow blink of pain, as Ruri is the kind of thing she doesn't believe... ought to be allowed to happen, not a child soldier this young.
Ever.
But what other way is there, than letting her live life as she wants?
She sits up and focuses as she speaks upon the Banshee and, Leina tells her quietly, "You probably weren't imagining it. From what I know, the Banshee is capable of psychic attacks... phenomena that wouldn't be able to be captured except with certain rare instruments."
There's something heartbroken in her eyes as she relates to her, "Elpeo - her name was... was Elpeo... she was very childish, and attached to certain people very easily. She was very possessive... and jealous about it. It's not her fault, she was raised by bad people who let her act out so long as she'd... get in a mobile suit and kill for them."
There is a quiet, somber pause and... "It's okay Ruri, it's not on you to solve this. Thank you for talking about it, even though I know it must have been hard. I'm sorry she hurt you like that."
Ruri however then asks a big question, and Leina's eyes flare open, "No!" She almost shouts, in shock, startled, then...
...
...
...
Taking a deep breath, her fingertips curl on the edge of the table, gripping them, white knuckled, and she lets herself breathe, "I'm sorry... you just, surprised me. The question was a little upsetting." A few more breaths before, "It's... the pilot of the Phenex, her situation is complicated, but it was by her own choice she came to be like this. And... the Banshee is the result of a crime of science."
Leina says quietly, easing off of the idea, "He's not going to die Ruri. I know it sounds like a commonality... but it isn't. And even besides that..."
The sorrowful look in her eyes becomes one of focused determination, "... that isn't going to happen, because I won't let it."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Omoikane likes anime, too! But Ruri thinks it's all a bit foolish...
"That isn't to say machines and humans can't understand each other," Ruri adds, hearing what Leina focuses on. "But there's a difference between understanding someone and getting into their head." Is there? Ruri seems to think so.
And Leina isn't the first person to have thought that Ruri's existence wasn't really fair. Many people have. Ruri knows how they feel; she's reflected on that, too. Those feelings aren't something she can just dismiss as foolish, given how much of that pain she's seen, in response to her and her uniform.
She just... doesn't want to waste all that time she spent learning all there is to know about this sort of thing. And she doesn't want to leave Omoikane alone, either. If the Nadesico is her family, Omoikane is her closest family. She has to take care of him!
"Oh," Ruri frowns, hearing about Elpeo. "So unlike me, she wasn't a bad girl... I wish she hadn't died." There's a lot to unpack there, but it might be better to just throw the suitcase out.
Is she hurt?
That hurts, anyway. "Ah!" Ruri gasps, jerking back, hands lifting to cover her core. She was still leaned in, given how personal the conversation felt. She was already nervous, given the topic.
It might be strange to hear enough emotion enter her voice for her to cry out, though, even though it was a short thing. She swallows, and looks away, lips pressing tightly together. She doesn't challenge the silence.
"It was my fault," she insists, once Leina's broken it instead, and her tone is steady again. "I was being rude. I asked something I shouldn't have. I..." don't want more people to die,
Ruri folds her hands in her lap, instead. "I didn't mean to say you wouldn't save him. I'm sure you'll protect him, since you were willing to get beat up so much to save your girlfriend, too. I don't think you can't do that." She pauses, squeezing her own hand. "Do you want me to go?" She asks, and for once in her life sounds like the unsure child she is.
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
Is there?
Well maybe when one is a machine, Leina certainly hasn't been able to connect with one, so she can't really offer any insight into the matter.
Just that for Newtypes, understanding someone is the key to getting inside of their head. That connection... but...
... maybe that's it, that she requires a different manner of connection that's incompatible with that kind of method.
Either way, Leina finds herself only a touch baffled by it, in the end - AIs are people, so it makes sense that some people would be able to connect with them.
As Ruri speaks on Elpeo, she... recalls handcuffs being snapped to her hands, being dragged into a mobile suit. She recalls her being tricked and led away - the feel of cold rusted metal pressing her throat shut.
"She... wasn't. She just needed chances to be good." Then more quietly, "I wish she hadn't either."
Ruri jerked back at her reaction, and Ruri insists it was her fault. Leina takes a deep breath, eyes shut, feeling the cadence of emotions here thrumming into her head.
In the end, she's just a scared child, who doesn't want anyone to die.
Leina forces herself to be calm, then smiles at her and opens her eyes, "You only asked because you were worried about him, scared for him." She asks, after a moment before putting it very gently, "It's okay Ruri."
After a short pause, she adds ever so softly, "I am too."
She lets that hang for a while, but ultimately she hasn't answered the question now has she?
There's an almost visible debate, a struggle there, but eventually she articulates her decision very simply, "No, I think... I'd like very much not to be alone right now."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Ruri's never been treated so unkindly.
Everyone's always been nice to her.
Everyone's always been supportive of her.
So it's different, really.
"Mm..." Ruri hums, when Leina tells her it's okay. "I'm sorry. You must be a lot more worried. I didn't mean to make you feel that bad."
And, she really doesn't...
"Okay," Ruri says, though she's still talking to her hands. "I can stay a while longer. So long as there's not an emergency. I'll have to go back to the bridge, then. But if that doesn't happen, I can stay with you."
She's quiet for more long moments, before she asks... "Um... do you want to see my Haros?"
And if she does, she'll get the best distraction of all:
Archimedes and Harro, the latter of whom is still zooping around on Photon Power.