2023-02-28: The Excruciating Ordeal of Being Known
- Cast: Marida Cruz, Leina Ashta
- Where: Ra Mari
- Date: U.C. 0097 02 28
- Summary: Leina finally meets the twelfth Puru, and Marida learns more about the first and second.
<Pose Tracker> Marida Cruz has posed.
The mess hall of the Ra Mari was typically pretty empty this time of day, which made it the perfect time for Miss Marida Cruz to eat. She didn't enjoy small talk in general, let alone while she was eating, so she tended to dine alone whenever possible. The rations on the Ra Mari were better than the ones served on the Garincieres, but the taste was of little concern to her. As long as it filled her stomach.
As she got halfway through her meal, a sudden thought crossed her mind. I wonder what Elpeo liked to eat. She squints her eyes and shakes her head, trying to chase those thoughts out of her head. Banagher's news yesterday had brought several such unpleasant ideas to the forefront. She had never had to deal with the reality of Elpeo Puru before now. It...troubled her. After a second, she returns to her silent meal.
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
Her mobile suit was under maintenance by Shuffle and Leina needed to get to Japan, quickly. Stubborn to a fault, she didn't ask her numerous friends for a favor.
Instead she has a shuttle from Orb to Fujinomiya leaving later in the day.
Swinging by the Ra Mari II had its benefits though. Exhausted, and faintly haggard looking despite her best efforts to cover it up with makeup, she's dressed in a cream colored sweater, some skinny jeans, and a pair of worn trainers. She's got a bag over her shoulder, and her hair is accessorized by a Haro chara barrette.
Swinging by the Ra Mari cafeteria for a bite to eat, she looks unfocused as she grabs a simple burger and fries from their grill.
Rubbing her eyes she smiles and murmurs, "Thanks." She says to the short order cook they have before taking the tray and grabbing just some water and ice out of a dispenser.
The girl turns around, and nearly walks on by Marida straight away. However, this faint tug of connection pulls her to stop a few paces past her. Then look over her shoulder and...
... her hands go nerveless, as memory floods her.
-=-=-
BGM Start - Regression (Instrumental) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1xZ81Z-Dj4g
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A much younger Leina, no older than ten or eleven, walks with Glemy Toto in his officer's uniform through an Axis Palace.
Then suddenly its heard, distant but steadily coming closer. A girl with orange hair and still dripping wet, in a state of only partial dress.
"PuruPuruPuruPuruPuruPuruPuru!"
-=-=-
The streets of Axis detonate and melt, beamfire from funnels scattering what's left of people to lay unmoving in the torn streets a handcuffed Leina shakes a screaming child in a cockpit, "You have to stop! Please! If more people die for your selfishness, then my brother will hate you!"
"He'll... he'll hate me?"
All at once that awful sense of pressure fades.
-=-=-
Two children grapple on a beach, one in a formal dress soaked in blood. Eventually Elpeo gets the upper hand on Leina, putting a rusted pipe to her neck.
Elpeo tells her apologetically, "Sorry but-!" She pulls the pipe tighter to her neck, "It's my turn to be happy now!"
A masculine voice interrupts with, "Puru-!"
-=-=-
It hasn't even been a fraction of a second that she's caught in her own memories when the tray hits the floor, cup clattering and spilling water, the food falling on the ground. She doesn't even make a move to pick it up. To clean up in this moment.
Her eyes water, as she blinks them rapidly, looking for a moment, then closing her eyes as if to recompose herself. It's only then that she grabs some napkins from her tray, and bends over, quickly trying to dab it up, and put everything back on the tray, to clean the small puddle she caused, then gripping what now needs to be bussed, she sets it aside for now on a table.
Putting on a smile like a sticker, she walks up to Marida and...
"Hello there. I'm Leina Ashta." Before she then shifts to asking, "You're Marida right? I've..."
Hesitantly she puts up a hand, as if to shake her own smile growing shakier, "... I've been waiting a very long time to finally meet you."
<Pose Tracker> Marida Cruz has posed.
Marida looks up at Leina as her cup falls. One downside of being on this new ship was not knowing everyone who came and went. Something about this one looked...strangely familiar to her, though. It seemed the feeling was mutual as the girl walked up to her and offered her name. Ashta...
"Ashta? You're Judau's sister, then. Yes, I'm Marida Cruz. Pleasure." The voice was deeper, more mature, and less energetic, but...that was unmistakably Elpeo Puru. She wipes her hands with her napkin and takes the one Leina offers, giving a firm handshake. Leina was probably the only person alive who had interacted with both the first Puru and and twelfth Puru, and could probably tell better than anyone else the difference between the two. Her steely gaze meets Leina's, almost staring into her soul.
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
All thoughts of eating lunch are abandoned, as Leina shakes her hand, "It's lovely to meet you. And yes, that's right." She says and her tone sounds sincere, "Do you mind if I join you?"
Leina's smile dims, "I'd really like to know more about you. I talk to your f- to Captain Zinnerman, when I can. I've been doing my best to offer support, given the circumstances you've all found yourselves in."
Leina doesn't say why she hasn't been aboard the Garencieres at first, it's a tough talk but, as a one time hostage of Neo-Zeon, and the ward of Sayla Mass... she couldn't bet her life on the idea that Full Frontal wouldn't override the Captain.
Marida might see her staring back, but there's, a contrast of sadness and happiness in her eyes. She knows its not her. She knows. They're all individuals, but...
"I'm also familiar with your sister, Callisto. I've been, trying to align circumstances so you two can meet properly. I can't imagine it'll be too long, given..."
A small motion of her hand, as if to indicate 'because you're on the Ra Mari.'
"... that she's part of the crew here."
<Pose Tracker> Marida Cruz has posed.
"There...really isn't much to know about me aside from what you've probably heard from Master." Marida really never thought that much about herself. She ate, slept, filed papers, and killed. That's all there was to Marida Cruz.
She moves to the side to make room for Leina to sit down, blinking at the mention of Callisto. That was...2, correct? She was on the Ra Mari's crew? She had never met any of the others. The moment she was born, she was hurried into a Qubeley and made to fight. First 1, and now 2. What would she do when they met? Having a...sister was not something familiar to her. "Ah, I see. Yes, I'm surprised we haven't crossed paths. The Ra Mari is a bit of a bigger ship than the Garincieres, it feels."
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
It hurts a little to hear her call him Master, even if she likes Zinnerman, she knows Marida is still conditioned.
And as much as Callisto threw off her shackles, Full Frontal undid years of progress with a single phrase.
"I doubt that's true, though I understand why you think it might be so." Leina takes a small breath, "Because I'm... familiar with your first master, Glemy Toto. He made me his prisoner of war when I was a child and, treated me as his pet doll."
She struggles with the words, it hurts to call herself that, it hurts that its Full Frontal's phrasing, "To try and make me into a Lady of Neo-Zeon. So I have a lot of experience with his methods."
Leina fishes out a pen from her purse, and starts writing on a napkin, "As for Callisto, she hasn't been around the Ra Mari much... something Full Frontal did to her wounded her deeply."
Leina slides the napkin over to Marida, it reads, 'Full Frontal knew her Deep Conditioning trigger phrase to turn her on her allies. Be careful.'
She's underlined 'Be careful.' three times.
<Pose Tracker> Marida Cruz has posed.
Marida looks at the note and sighs. Of course. Why wouldn't that man take after the folly of Toto? It made sense that she and her sisters would have conditioning like that, but she had never been put under its effects herself.
Had she?
No, dangerous thoughts. Put those away. No more thinking. Empty head.
...Better.
"I'm not surprised. I haven't had too much time with the man, but he seems exceptionally cruel in that way." But who was she to speak against the Colonel? This was the cause that her master fought for, and so it would be the cause she fought for. There was no thought beyond that.
"Between this and what Banagher told me about the other day...I'll try to be on my guard."
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
Leina isn't precisely a fan of discussing Full Frontal, but, right now she feels she needs to be up front, so she tells her honestly, "He is, a bully, who's in denial of his true circumstances. I feel, in a sense having these grand ideals is a coping mechanism for the horrors he faced in the past. If he is an empty vessel, then he's empty of those horrors as well, and all memory of them."
There is more to it than that, but that'd be breaking several major intelligence secrets all at once.
There is some relief there though, "I'm glad. I don't think that man would hesitate to utilize that form of cruelty if he felt even for a second that an advantage could be gained by using it."
She smiles at Marida, "How long have you been with Captain Zinnerman? Do you get along well with the rest of his crew?"
She's not trying to undermine them here, she's just genuinely interested in her circumstances.
<Pose Tracker> Marida Cruz has posed.
Master...the time they had spent together was essentially the entirety of her memory. She tried not to think about before that.
"I would say it's been nearly ten years. He and the crew are kind to me. It's really all I can do to fight for them."
Her voice doesn't change as she admits her purpose, as a weapon. It was a miracle she had found a good man to fight for.
"Are the crew here kind to my sister?"
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
Leina actually sighs, smiling in relief, "I'm glad on that, it means he found you so soon after the final battle of the First War."
Folding her hands, the smile broadens, "And I'm rather certain that's not true, I think you do a lot for them just by being one of them. Not as a pilot, but as Marida Cruz."
After all, she knows she does so much for Captain Zinnerman by being there. She asks that question, "Very much so. Not all of them knew her past circumstances, but they treat her as a person, and one of them. She rooms with Arriety, and she's a member of their Kakapo Squadron. From what I understand she's been with them for years."
There's this affectionate fondness as she speaks about her, "I trust her with my life. In a way I kind of... consider her family."
Leina clears her throat on the subject, that one opens up ALL kinds of cans of worms, on how important finding Marida was to her.
<Pose Tracker> Marida Cruz has posed.
"I am...glad she managed to find happiness."
As Leina clears her throat, Marida looks down a bit. Was the crew...her family? How could they know her enough to love her? She didn't even know anything about herself. What was there to know? She wasn't even her own person...was she?
Her head throbs for a second, blurring her vision momentarily. This entire thing was becoming a true ordeal for her.
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
"Me too."
There's this lengthy pause in this moment, and Leina just seems to be looking Marida over for her reactions, her intentionality.
Marida would feel with relative ease that Leina is an exceptionally powerful Newtype. Not quite the white hot fire of her brother, but still powerful.
It takes her a moment, then there's a smile, "I suppose this is very hard for you. To hear these things. To know there's people out there rooting for you beyond the people on your crew."
There's this pause and her head dips, "The last time I saw Elpeo, she cried. She raged. She was so upset, it was unfair to her that she was raised to be a weapon, and I was raised to be a Lady - by the same person, by Glemy."
Leina takes a deep breath, looking at the table, "We decided, the three of us, me her and Judau, to become a family together. In the end, that's all it takes I think. That decision."
Her expression turns sorrowful, "It was the last time I ever saw her before she passed away."
<Pose Tracker> Marida Cruz has posed.
Marida places her hands in her lap and looks forward as Leina speaks about her progenitor. This was...the most she had ever heard about Elpeo.
She feels an unfamiliar pang in her chest...She could feel Leina's pain, her sadness. It was everywhere. A decision is all it takes...was...was she loved?
Without a word and without a change in expression, her eyes welled up with tears, drops streaming down her cheeks.
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
The sadness, the pain about her is unmistakable, right now it's worse than most times even, knowing that Vist is out there exploiting another of them. God knows in what form. There was never a Puru-1 before as far as she's aware.
However, when she sees the tears, her smile just breaks, and... slowly she stands up from her seat, moves around to the other side of the table, squatting down.
Then making slow movements, starts placing her arms around her in a hug, from that slightly sideways and behind angle.
"Sorry. That was a lot, wasn't it? I just, to this day I see her as a little sister in a way." She says softly, "And I see you and Callisto as her sisters."
It's a kinder word than clone in her eyes. That's not who they have to be. "Can't help it. You don't have to accept that, if you don't want to."
There's a warmth in her smile, "But I'll keep on rooting for, and supporting the sister of my little sister - as much as I can."
Does that make THEM sisters in her eyes? Why yes, but she doesn't want to force that on any of them.
<Pose Tracker> Marida Cruz has posed.
She blinks her eyes, attempting to make the tears go away, barely giving Leina a reaction from the hug. She was showing enough emotion as it was.
"I apologize. This is...a lot for me. I've never felt such a...strong connection than I do to those two. And I haven't even met them. I'm such a fool, aren't I?"
One hand comes up to gently wipe her cheeks clear, a shuddered breath leaving her mouth as she attempts to put herself back together.
"Sister. It's such a foreign word. But...it's also a warm word."
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
Leina doesn't seem to think anything of her lack of reaction. Ever since she left Neo-Zeon, her volunteer work with the Yumi Foundation, her connections to the Shuffle Alliance, it kept her in contact with people in similar situations.
She doesn't blame her for what was done to her.
"No." Leina says gently, but firmly, "You're not a fool at all. Sometimes we can't change the way we feel, but that doesn't mean its wrong."
Leina's grip loosens, though her arms remain there, "She hurt me so much in ways I'm still dealing with, but that doesn't change that I consider her my precious little sister."
A short pause and...
"And I hate what Glemy did to me, I hate it so much, but... he genuinely cared for me, in the ways he was capable of caring." Her eyes squeeze shut, "So I can't help but care about him too."
An inhalation through her nose, then, "It is. My... brother, is the most important person in the world to me. He was the only person who was truly there for me as a child, he always had my back, he fought a whole war to get me back from Neo-Zeon."
There a small smile, "Siblings... sisters are precious. There's so much warmth in those ties, when space is such a cold place."
<Pose Tracker> Marida Cruz has posed.
She thinks of Zinnerman. The most important person to her own world. In a way, she had still been floating in the coldness of space for most of her life, even after she had been recovered from her suit and bounced between colonies. She had nobody to turn to, nobody to talk to, and then he held out a hand and brought her into the light.
Maybe Callisto...
Maybe Elpeo Puru...
...could do the same.
"I should...probably head back to my quarters. Thank you, Leina. It was nice to meet you. I'll give the captain your regards." She gently releases the older girl's grasp and stands, giving her a curt and polite bow. She had a lot to think about, and she would rather not burden Leina with her emotions any more than she already had.
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
When she says that, Leina bobs her head, and loosens her arms to give her the opportunity to stand, bowing.
Leina stands herself, smiling, she doesn't try to force her to stay, she at least has some inkling of the things that Marida has to grapple in private, "I understand. It was good to finally meet you... and you're welcome. Please do."
But before she lets her go... "Do you happen to have VERTEX? Because I'd love to just, message you on occasion. Check up on you."
<Pose Tracker> Marida Cruz has posed.
"VERTEX...I think Master signed me up for that, yes. I haven't had much use for it, though. You're free to message if you wish." Marida gives her VERTEX name: MCruz666. Very plain, though who would expect any different?
<Pose Tracker> Leina Ashta has posed.
"Thank you so much, Marida."
Leina shares hers in short order, it's theater_girl_wp
She even explains, "I'm kind of a theater kid? And uh, WP is... an abbreviation for an anime that's real important to me. You know what don't worry about it! I'll explain later." A beat, "Take care of yourself!"
She'll probably wait a couple days at least to give her time to process before, she starts checking in.
<Pose Tracker> Marida Cruz has posed.
"Of course." Marida quickly turns on her heel and heads out of the mess hall, more tears coming as soon as she is out of view of Leina.