2022-06-30: Trees 'Grow' Into Cleared Space
- Log: Trees 'Grow' Into Cleared Space
- Cast: Ruri Hoshino, Eight York
- Where: The Nadesico
- Date: 2022-06-30
- Summary: With a little help from Omoikane, Ruri goes to check on Eight after the brutal battle against the Vajra. She does her best, and seeing that does help Eight, even given her losses.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Ruri Hoshino has been... not present, for a lot of their convalescence. Or, rather -- she's been tucked away on the bridge. Minato convinced her to go say hi to... at least one of her friends, afterwards... but all in all, Ruri has coped with the brutal assault of the Vajra the same way Ruri copes with everything:
Ruri is Busy and Cannot Take Your Concern Call At The Moment. Please call back later. Beeeeep... (Ruri, you can't just make a dial tone noise with your mouth to get out of an awkward conversation. Just what has Megumi been teaching you?)
... reports need to be filed. Injuries need to be reported. The Federation has an awful lot of work cataloguing their dead, even if the Nadesico, with their monkey's-paw luck, was spared the worst of it. Ruri can help by sending the Nadesico's sensor reports to those ships who request it; a top-of-the-line ship like this can help piece together a lot of puzzles for wounded people.
And of course, there were the sensor reports of that anomaly... too.
Omoikane, of course, has his own ideas about how to handle a brutal situation like that. Which is why a message box pops up over one of those reports, all a sudden --
< NOW LOCATING . . . >
< GUEST SIGNATURE: CPT YORK >
< LOCATION: OBSERVATION DECK >
"Ah... she's here again..?" Ruri asks, looking down to her console. "... that's good. I hope she can relax."
The frustrated feeling Omoikane has can't be translated to a bounded text box, but Ruri gets the idea, anyway.
"No, I... don't want to bother her," Ruri shakes her head. "I'm sure she's occupied."
Eight immediately receives a bounded text box of her own, in the Observation Deck, because Omoikane, a supercomputer, has already decided on the optimal outcome.
< CAPTAIN YORK >
< ARE YOU BUSY ? >
And a moment later, he just opens a communication window between them, which -- give her credit -- doesn't outwardly fluster the perpetually-stoic Ruri. She takes a moment to explain that Omoikane was worried about her, asks if she can intrude on her visit...
On-Break Gekiganger dutifully takes his place at Ruri's station, denoting that Ruri is On Break; luckily, Omoikane plays favourites, so any critical systems operations will still go through just fine now they're automated.
The Observation Deck feels a lot larger than it is, thanks to the wide screens which occupy the walls of the room, playing gentle scenes of nature. The grassy floor might not be real grass -- though even if it isn't, with Lucine on the crew it's probably just a matter of time -- but either way it feels real, because Nergal has nothing if not money and niche expertise. When Ruri steps in, it's in her usual diminutive Nergal uniform -- another little clue that she's been working, all this time.
Ruri, at least, is physically unharmed. The bridge of the Nadesico is very well defended -- and with their gravity controls, they don't even have to worry about whiplash. The fact of the matter is that Ruri is in very little danger, when she goes into battle; for her to be injured would take nothing less than a total breakdown of all the Nadesico's defensive systems.
Mentally...
... her face is a still pond, but they're deep waters.
<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.
This time, Eight came on her own, at her own insistence. Since the Ra Mari can't take visitors at the moment, she decided to be a visitor herself, and the Observation Deck is a lot more pleasant than the cramped quarters on the base. It really is nice on here; sure, Eight has affection for her own ship, but theres no way the Federation would put a room like this on it. And real synthetic gravity is nice, too. Either way, Eight can relax a little...
And she does! But when Omoikane gives her a text box, Eight smiles at it. "Nah," she says. A moment later there is a line of communication open. Of course Ruri doesn't actively fluster--but Eight is happy to get a visitor. In fact, it's better than 'sitting around doing nothing', which is what she mostly has to do at the moment.
Eight is also in uniform, but she's been working, too--and she feels llike she has to be a little formal. It makes her feel a bit better. However, while most of the bandages are gone thanks to modern medicine, there's still one over her left eyebrow that's big enough to be noticed, and her arm is still in a sling. She doesn't have ice on it this time.
On the bright side, the pain isn't quite as bad as it was at that initial get-together, which means it's still significant, but easier to hide. ...as badly as the Ra Mari was damaged, at least the bridge wasn't directly hit.
Eight smiles when Ruri arrives, though. "Hi," she says. "I wanted to thank you for your work, too. That defensive routine you sent us really helped."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"Hello, Captain York," Ruri greets Eight, with a little bow of her head. She's... bothered, seeing Eight hurt like this. Oh, she doesn't frown or weep about it -- her face remains impassive, and her voice remains steady -- but that doesn't mean her heart doesn't ache when she sees what Eight is still dealing with, even days later.
... advances in modern medicine, Ruri knows, have made minor injuries easy to heal quite quickly. If Eight is still bandaged up, the implications are clear to her. She guesses it must be some manner of deeper muscle injury... she was looking it up, after all.
So she doesn't smile -- but then, she never once has.
"I'm glad it helped," she tells her, quite proper. "But... it would have been better if it were more effective." Ruri pauses, for a moment, sad and uncertain, and settles on saying nothing at all.
Ruri... heard some things, about that battle. Actually, funerals bother her. It was Yurika's tireless dedication to sending everyone off after their struggle against the Big Barrier which made Ruri decide to trust her, did you know?
"Thank you for your hard work, too," Ruri says, instead, after a pause just long enough to be awkward.
<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.
Eight doesn't insist that Ruri use a less formal term of address. She'll accept it, as it is. Because she has to accept Ruri as she is, unsmiling and everything. ...So it's all right. Eight even doesn't make an effort to 'feel' more than she already would, trying to ignore that sense. It's not quite the same as closing her eyes. But she doesn't need to reach out to use her sight to see Ruri, to hear her voice.
Sad and uncertain... Eight doesn't need to do more than look at her to know that much. So she doesn't argue with her.
Eight, now that Ruri is up close, also still looks tired. Her eyes are a little bloodshot, something she can't entirely hide, and there's bags under them. But she's smiling anyway, because that's what Eight is like.
"I appreciate that," Eight says. "...I did the best that I could." She looks down, at that, and the emotions she's been sitting on threaten to come back in a rush. If that's her best..
She shakes her head, as if to dismiss them. "Want to join me? It's nice down here." Sitting down, that is.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Ruri... has managed to get onto a mostly first-name basis, with some people. Minato, and Megumi, and Ranka, and Kaworu... of course, she's borrowing honourifics to keep some distance, even then.
... she hasn't quite gotten the hang of calling Eight anything else, though; maybe it has to do with her position.
Eight is tired, but Ruri doesn't look very tired. Ruri's body is frail, but well-tuned; she doesn't suffer from illnesses like insomnia or colds, the way some people do. Her internal systems are very, very good at regulating themselves, and very good at keeping out invaders.
(Ruri isn't sure why she's never had a cold, but maybe it's just because she's young.)
But... Eight is smiling, even though all that... Ruri wonders if she'd rather host a wedding, too. It's sad; she's sad. Somehow, this place just feels a little dismal. Because she's sad..?
"Sure," Ruri says, without complaint, when Eight invites her to sit. She perches herself right down on the grass, with cris-crossed legs, in that style of perch which is so natural to the youth.
Ruri looks up, to the screens; they tower over her even more, now she's sitting down. Those peaceful scenes of trees...
"I visited this place before I saw anything like it for myself," Ruri says, instead of talking about the Vajra so directly. "It's not the largest room in the Nadesico, but it feels much larger thanks to the optical illusions. The air filtration and temperature here has been specifically calibrated to emulate nature. I think a lot of people on the Nadesico like to come here when something is troubling them... or just appear here out of nowhere."
She's being fanciful with that last part, surely.
<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.
It might be her position. Maybe.
Eight does not have such good fortune with her body. Even now her injuries pain her much more than they should, the lingering evidence of tampering with her mind and nerves to force her awareness open. She is usually on a number of painkillers to begin with. But she keeps herself in good shape, and does all the little things to regulate her body, and that helps a lot.
When Ruri sits, Eight smiles a little more. ...The truth is that she'd much rather be doing weddings.
"...They have trees and grass and stuff on the colony," Eight says, "Though they're mostly snowy where I come from. That's why weather didn't spook me too much when I got to Earth."
She kind of expcted to talk about the Vajra.
"...That makes sense. It does feel bigger, and that's part of why I was here. The air and temperature are... nice. A little warm, but nice."
Pause. "I can't say people appear out of nowhere that often on the Ra Mari. But if we had a place like this I think people would come here, too."
"Coming here when they're troubled.. I guess i am, if I'm being honest."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"Oh... I've never been out in snow myself," Ruri says, blinking. "When we went to rescue the polar bear ambassador, it was much too cold and dangerous to go outside." She delivers the line 'rescue the polar bear ambassador' with absolute stoic seriousness, because that is literally what they did.
(Eight would have heard about it; Rena, Arriety and Minae all helped out, after all.)
Eight might have expected to talk about the Vajra -- but really, Ruri's being as polite as the Nadesico's sensibilities. She assumes Eight wouldn't want to talk about such a frightening thing, either, so she gives her some fun facts about the Nadesico instead. Now, they might be operational secrets -- but they're not important operational secrets, so Ruri doesn't mind.
"The room is simulating a summer day in a clearing," Ruri explains, "which is why it's warm." It really does speak to her logic that knowing why makes things better.
"Well, they can come to this room," Ruri insists, with all the logic of her youth. "Since we were able to get you basic security clearances, it shouldn't be any trouble for anyone to visit, so long as our ships are together like this." The fact that the crew of the Ra Mari are so welcome on the Nadesico by virtue of their friendships with the littlest crewmember is, perhaps, the surest indication that the Nadesico is not a military vessel.
(Besides, revoking that invitation would involve telling Ms. Howmei that she won't be able to help Arriety on her culinary journey any more, and Ruri is quite sure that not even the Admiral is brave enough for that fight.)
It's a very... operational way of solving problems. Offer practical solutions, practical explanations...
But somehow, Ruri isn't entirely sure it's fitting. This is the Nadesico's style of comfort, but...
Ruri's fingers twiddle, against her shins. She pauses, for a moment.
"I heard it's pretty normal not to be okay with something like that breaking out with no warning," Ruri says, in perfect echo of Eight's own words, six months prior. "So if you're troubled, that's fine, I think."
<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.
"Maybe we can change that sometime. It's not always so cold and dangerous." Eight is familiar with it, which is why she doesn't double-take or laugh. ...She thinks it's nice, to rescue a polar bear.
It is a very Nadesico approach; Eight has seen over and over the ways in which the Nadesico is not at all a military operation. For the most part, she thinks that's for the best... but sometimes, she worries for a bunch of civilians put into these positions. Not just Ruri, either.
"Oh, yeah?" Eight asks when Ruri explains. "That makes sense. I don't mind warm sometimes, anyway. I'm just used to the cold."
The room... "Hmm. Maybe I'll let them do that, since you're offering. The base is pretty cramped. ...I know Rezza would appreciate the chance to get out in nature. Did you know that they're from Earth? They don't talk about it much, but they are." It's not quite nature... but it feels like it.
But when Ruri repeats her own words to her, Eight turns to Ruri, and for once she can see that she's caught the Captain by surprise, by the way her mouth is just slightly open, her eyes a little blank. "...Ruri..."
She looks down, and smiles. "Thank you. You're right, of course. I can't say it's not normal, to be troubled like that. ...And I am. I wish..."
She looks up, into the 'sky'. "I wish my 'best' were better. Maybe if I'd been able to give better orders, then..."
She stops herself, and shakes her head, looking down again. "But it doesn't help anyone to think that way. It's my job, to be OK for everyone. So I'll do it." She puts her smile back on. "But thank you for that."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"Oh," Ruri blinks. "I didn't know. Maybe they'd like it here, then?" She reflects on how she feels, about coming from Earth; she supposes she must, just the same, but she doesn't feel much connection to the blue planet. She was raised for the Nadesico, so...
... logically, isn't open space her home?
One more, amongst a field of stars...
Ruri's brow arcs upwards, just so, in a subtle show of worry; in that instance she wonders if she's done the wrong thing, referring back to Eight's words as she did. She wasn't trying to make fun of her, but maybe it sounded that way, anyway?
Before she can think of what to do to address this foolish situation, though, Eight's smiling again. Ruri's relief to hear her take it well is palpable; this sort of emotional reassurance is both above her paygrade and entirely out of her remit.
"Oh," Ruri says, once Eight finishes telling her what her job is. "The Captain doesn't know what being captain means for her, so you should tell her, since you've figured it out."
She pauses, looking over to Eight, with a light scowl. "... but I think Arriety-san will be able to tell if you're just okay because it's your job," Ruri points out, critically, beats later. "If a captain's role is interpersonal, then isn't it also your job to recognise when you have time to feel sad? You need to be able to perform adequately when the enemy arrives again. You won't have time to feel sad about it, then."
It's certainly an evolution from how she's approached the matter of feelings in the past; perhaps everyone sharing their own feelings with her has had more of an effect than it seems.
<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.
"I think so. But they wouldn't go on their own, so I might have to suggest it."
In this field of stars, there is at least life. Eight didn't think of Ruri as making fun of her, at least. But Eight is resilient, and she isn't going to collapse over this. ...Ruri though says something she doesn't expect. Oh, not the part about Yurika--
"I'm not sure she'd appreciate my meddling. She seems to do well, though, even if she's not sure."
But Ruri... scowls at her, and Eight actually laughs a little. She puts up a finger to forestall Ruri getting mad about it, and says, "You know, that's exactly right."
It's a huge evolution. Eight smiles more widely than before, and doesn't have to force it this time. "She can tell when it's like that. She knows me really well, you know. And she's one of the people who's closest to me."
"...I need to project an image of strength. That reassures the crew, and lets them do their jobs. But if I'm just faking it, they'll be able to tell. People aren't dumb, you know?" Eight nods, as if that's something she agrees with or is important. "So I need to process my own feelings, too. And I have had some time to be sad. ...I still am. We lost a lot of people. I've written letters, to their families..."
"You're not part of my crew, so can I tell you a couple secrets?" she asks, and then leans in. "...I cried on Lavhi for about an hour, that night. And the next day he wouldn't leave my side, in case I fell over."
"And my arm really, really hurts." She smiles anyway.
"...So you don't have to worry. I'll take time for myself, too. Thank you, for being willing to speak honestly to me about my feelings, and what I need to do. I really appreciate your willingness to say hard things."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Yurika does seem to do well, for all her foolishness. In fact, Yurika's insights have a lot to do with why Ruri is criticising Eight's idea of what a Captain does, now. Because if Yurika can care that much about Ruri's experiences -- how can Eight care so little about hers?
Ruri's head cants to the side, when Eight laughs and lifts a finger. "...?" It's hard to say she's said anything, but her confusion is audible anyway.
She's... exactly right? And Eight's smile doesn't seem so disingenuous, this time, though Ruri can't say entirely how she's sure.
So to Eight, it's about projecting strength... but it has to be genuine.
"Yes," Ruri confirms, without interrupting Eight overmuch, when she asks if she can tell her a secret. She's listening. She doesn't lean away, when Eight leans in, which is its own little miracle; Ruri is generally uncomfortable with other people entering her personal space.
Perhaps she trusts her not to do something like try to pet her head.
Ruri looks -- surprised, if anything, when Eight praises her capacity to say difficult things. The expression softens to something more gentle; she isn't the type to smile, but her eyes aren't always so harsh.
"... I'm happy to hear that," she says, after a moment -- and she is, for all the wan qualities of her expression. "That you'll take time for yourself, I mean. And... your evaluation of me," Ruri settles on, a little self-conscious. She shakes her head, and presses on: "I hope your arm feels better, soon... I don't know if the other things ever do, but I guess that's normal. Those hats looked pretty heavy, so..."
Ruri doesn't entirely get to explaining what hats have to do with it, but she remembers Yurika collapsing down without bothering to take them off. She had to remind her about them. She didn't have to wear them, though.
"There's a meditation room on board here... it also has VR capabilities. We have a recreational room, too. The Nadesico isn't a military ship, so I guess it's a lot more comfortable... if you wanted to use those things, too, I'm sure it would be fine." More operational solutions; she's doing her best.
Ruri pauses, and adds: "And if there's something you can't tell the Ra Mari, I can listen. I'm sure you can tell the Captain, too. She's a very foolish woman, but she knows a lot about people... she's more reliable than she looks." Ruri.... might actually be relying on her, even, because Ruri has some sense of how out of her depth she is with the emotional consequences of death.
"... I guess... if I'm saying all this... I'm hypocritical if I just keep working, too," Ruri adds, slowly. "Well, it's not like I'm going to make my feelings everyone's problem, but... I suppose we're not in a combat situation right now. Maybe I was trying to ignore it... I don't know." It's her turn, to look up to the simulated sky.
"But maybe I'll stay here a little bit, if that's okay."
<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.
Eight doesn't even consider patting Ruri's head!
Ruri's happy to hear what she says. Eight is glad of that. And of what Ruri says, too. She doesn't push it, though--she can tell Ruri's a little self-conscious. "They tell me it'll heal in a couple weeks," she says of her arm. The other things..." Pause. "Heavy hats?" She tilts her head quizzically.
Operational solutions; Eight smiles. She will think about using those. She knows what usually helps her relax, anyway, and it's not being on cramped bases. Even the colonies had more space than this place does.
But Ruri and... "Your Captain is very kind," Eight says. "Maybe I will talk to her sometime. I know she'd understand a lot about what I go through, being a Captain too." A smile, and this one isn't forced, either.
But... Hmm. Ruri seems to puzzle it out, and it would be clever if Eight had planned that in the first place... but she didn't. It's just how things turned out, being honest about her feelings with her friend. And that's one of the reasons she prefers to do it.
"We aren't," Eight agrees. "And you can stay. In fact, I'd like you to. ...It's better to be here with a friend than alone, I think."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"Mm," Ruri nods, to Eight's question. "The Captain had to wear a lot of them, for all the funerals after we left Earth the first time." Violently. "Since there are a lot of different cultures, and they all have their own funerary traditions to respect."
Respecting the immensity of the Earth Sphere is something of a trend, for the Nadesico; Ms. Howmei is notorious for being able to prepare dishes from a vast number of cultures, due to her incredibly detailed and care-driven spice rack.
She nods, again, when Eight supposes Yurika is a kind person. And when Eight says she'd like her to stay, Ruri nods, settling down more comfortably on the grass.
"With a friend..." She repeats, contemplatively, with a faint sense of marvel that such a thing applies to her at all. "... yeah."
And even though this isn't a happy time, she can find some happiness in that.