2022-04-06: A 'Mysterious' Malefactor?
- Log: A 'Mysterious' Malefactor?
- Cast: Ruri Hoshino, Kaworu Nagisa
- Where: The Nadesico (Tokyo-3)
- Date: 2022-04-06 (0096)
- Summary: Ruri talks about Alexis Kerib with her friend, Kaworu.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
The Nadesico's found itself parked in Tokyo-3, again; blame some administrative detail or another. At the Nadesico's systems, Ruri isn't thinking of paperwork -- though someone, at least, is keeping an Administrator in mind.
"Black laboratories operate in many nations," Ruri reads, aloud, from the data Sayla gave her. She ever turns to encyclopaedias for understanding, after all. "While some of these focus on alteration of the human condition after birth, others deal in genetic engineering... I suppose it's not difficult to apply to a bear," she asides, drily, to the fourth wall or Omoikane or both.
Omoikane pops up a message box, over the entry.
< CURRENT LOCATION >
< TOKYO-3 >
< CURRENT TASK >
< RUMINATION >
"I know," Ruri says, unshaken. "But I want to know."
Omoikane, who can feel very well how melancholy Ruri's been ever since they transferred that bear -- even if he doesn't know precisely why, since Ruri's been uncharacteristically quiet about it -- insistently opens a blank message to Kaworu, escalating the bluntness of his point.
"Oh," Ruri blinks, looking to the empty message box. "I guess I did say I'd talk with him sometime... if you're worried, I'll do it, Omoikane." Omoikane is the only person who could get Ruri to agree without complaint or criticism. Really, the notable thing is that she's put it off at all.
... Omoikane told Ruri what he told Kaworu, after all, about how Alexis came to visit them again. He doesn't like lying.
Ruri doesn't have to type, hands to her console; rather, she translates, via her IFS.
> Hello, Kaworu-san. The Nadesico is in Tokyo-3 right now... it isn't urgent, but if there's a time I can speak with you soon, I'd appreciate your time.
> Of course, if you're busy, it's all right. I understand you're managing your own complement of fools.
And once all that's arranged --
The room for meeting guests is opulent as ever; green walls, brown couches, an actual chandelier, a full fireplace. There's Nergal's emblem, on one wall -- the Federation's, opposite. Kaworu gets an escort in from one of Uribatake's boys in blue, who's seizing the opportunity to get a minute away from a problem. Ruri, naturally, is already here, in her Nergal bridge uniform, hands folded neatly in her lap.
"Thank you for coming, Kaworu-san," Ruri greets him, still with that tone of distance around her familiarity. "I hope Miss Langley wasn't too troublesome on our return... unfortunately, our rescue mission ended up retrieving a bear, and she wasn't terribly happy about that." Actually, she tried to punch an admiral. Ruri elects not to mention that detail, because she didn't manage to succeed, anyway.
Omoikane opens his own warm textboxes in greeting, of course:
< o/` >
< WELCOME BACK >
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
The Nadesico has been working fairly closely with NERV for a while now! There's surely some kind of important off-screen reason for it being in Tokyo-3 that is otherwise totally irrelevant to the events that are about to transpire. It's fine.
Kaworu has indeed been managing his own complement of fools, though things have been looking up on that front lately. Like Ruri, he doesn't need to type--doesn't even need to get out his phone when it chimes notification of having received a message (something he has on solely so others around him aren't weirded out when he knows he has an incoming message or call), simply tunes into the electronic message by focusing his attention a bit.
> Hello, Ruri-san. I'm happy to hear from you, and I'm just as happy to come speak with you soon. Would a little later tonight be all right?
And from there, the meeting details are arranged. Kaworu finishes up his work--something that's been particularly heavy lately--and heads over to the Nadesico. He'd sent Ruri a message after he'd heard about that meeting with Alexis, but... their respective schedules had prevented them from actually seeing one another until now, it seems. It's good that they can see each other now. He'd been worried about her. Not enough to stress about it--Omoikane is there with her, as is the rest of the Nadesico--but... still.
So he arrives at the Nadesico, following casually after one of Uribatake's boys with hands in his slacks. He'd come from work, so he's wearing his administrator uniform--basically a black suit with a purple scarf-like tie and a beige STORAGE-style jacket. He gives Ruri a broad smile once he's in the guest meeting room and seats himself opposite her, folding his legs elegantly as he settles.
"The Second is never happy about anything, so don't worry about that at all," Kaworu reassures her, seemingly unbothered by Ruri's distant demeanor. "I only hope that she didn't cause you all too much trouble." The Eighth Angel is coming soon... Then they'll see if she settles down after all.
When Omoikane opens up a textbox in greeting, Kaworu's smile widens as he breathes a laugh, eyes squinting momentarily shut. "Thank you! It's good to be back. There's a certain warmth among the crew of the Nadesico that's pleasant to be around." He turns his smile Ruri's way. "...Though if it weren't for you two, I don't think I'd feel nearly as... well, welcomed."
He probably should segue directly into the matter of Alexis, but... they're not in a rush. He'd rather simply enjoy Ruri and Omoikane's company as a get-together between friends, or something close to friends, for a few seconds longer.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Omoikane is just as cheery to see Kaworu! It's more of a feeling carried in the room, because there's no way to read tone into a text box, but nonetheless it displays:
< FRIENDS ARE WELCOME >
Ruri nods, which is about par for the course; of the two of them, Ruri may well be the one who expresses herself less. (She's still happy to see him, though.) "No more trouble than usual," she answers Kaworu's statement on Asuka, with her usual bluntness. "She's a fool, but she does provide competent assistance, when all's said and done." Which is as close as Ruri's getting to complimenting Asuka.
"Though," she supposes, lightly, looking up to the chandelier: "if we're so warm, I suppose it makes sense we're the ones the Federation would send to the Bering Strait. Well, who knows?" It's a strange touch of levity, but apparently Ruri's capable of that, too.
(She'd rather enjoy his company, too.)
But she does know that Kaworu wanted to talk to her, after Alexis's invasive visit; soon enough her gaze comes back to the other fey boy, still perfectly neutral. "I suppose... you're worried about Mr. Kerib," she ventures, finally, a hair reluctantly; there's a little tightening of her hands over each other, in her lap. "I admit that visit," not the last, "was intrusive, so I can see why Omoikane's worried, but..."
Ruri shakes her head; her twintails rustle, a little, back and forth. "Mr. Kerib saved my life, Kaworu-san. I was caught in a foolish situation when some Zentradi separatists attacked a gathering I'd attended... all I could do was call to him for help. Thanks to him, I wasn't hurt. So, you see... I think it's a little hasty to say he's a bad person, even if he's that much of a fool, sometimes."
Omoikane, evidently, isn't convinced, but he also doesn't interrupt, for now.
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
It really is nice to voice your feelings of friendship towards someone and have them confirm them in return wholeheartedly. It's a warm feeling too, as is Ruri's straight-faced joke. Kaworu laughs at it, low and soft and sincere. "Who knows," he agrees affably. As for Asuka: "If all that mattered about someone was their skill level, then no one would have any need to complain about the Second." Praise and a burn, all at once! Kaworu contains multitudes like that.
But the topic at hand does come up. Kaworu's smile ebbs, though it doesn't vanish entirely, and he nods. She admits that it was weird--but then talks about how later Alexis had saved her life, that all she had to do was call for him. Kaworu considers this for a moment.
"All you did was call to him, and he appeared?" he presses gently. "As in, you sent him a message or gave him a call, or was he there to begin with?"
No questions about the gathering itself. It might be worthy of questioning, but for the time being it seems more important to focus on what Alexis was doing there.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"Mr. Kerib always told me," which must mean it happened more than once, just like this: "that I need but cry for help, and it would be answered... I was suspicious about that, before this. But..." Ruri hesitates, for a moment, gaze flicking off to the side to look at the edge of that fireplace.
"I was caught out in a hall by a soldier... in any case, he meant to hurt me. There was no one to help me, and I couldn't get away, I certainly couldn't fight someone that big... he had a gun, Kaworu-san," Ruri explains, with a shred of no-duh obviousness to her neutrality. The roots of the matter are more afraid than sardonic, but -- Ruri does run deep, that way. It's not the sort of abyssal information she'd happily volunteer. "So, I cried out, just as he said... he swept me up and brought me to the Nadesico, just like that."
There's a faint little shrug of her shoulders, as she looks back to Kaworu. "I don't know where he was before then, but when I saw him later, he was apologetic about it being a last-minute appearance... I suppose he sees time differently to me. Moving through that space was all dark to me, but he could see perfectly well, after all."
Here, Omoikane does interject:
< SAW HIM ? >
Ruri blinks, surprise crossing her face. "Oh... I was going to tell you," she says, tone tilted to apologetic -- which means she didn't, yet -- with a little dip of her head. "When I was off the ship to oversee the polar bear transfer, Mr. Kerib wanted to visit me... but nothing bad happened, or anything like that."
Omoikane promptly flashes up a yellow-striped message more suited to the bridge:
< WARNING >
"... I didn't want to worry you," Ruri insists, a hair sullenly.
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
"He... always told you, hm," Kaworu says, tone neutral. It's easy to see how Ruri would be inclined to believe him now--he told her she could call for him and he would appear to help her, and when she put that to the test, he did so. To any reasonable observer, it would appear that he fulfilled his promise and is therefore trustworthy. Without greater context, Kaworu would be inclined to believe it too if he were in her position. Especially if she'd nearly been killed. Kaworu doesn't view life and death the way others do, so it's hard for him to process, but he at least understands on an intellectual level: death is the end, and the end is oblivion. It is the erasure of all that one is.
(Kaworu thinks that oblivion would be nice to experience one of these times, a quiet respite from endless repeats, but he knows he doesn't have that luxury, so he refrains from wishing for it too hard.)
Beyond that, it is true that Alexis is an alien being, one whose perspective is not the same as Ruri's. He's achingly long-lived, and Ruri is only twelve. Her observation isn't wrong. It's just that...
'Does she not have the tools to protect herself? ... She needs me less every day.'
'The world hurtles toward an inevitable end; are we not permitted to amuse ourselves in the interim? If their pain is constant and their hearts are sensitive, we really must do our best to find some joy in it.'
One day, should Alexis have his own way, he will wring every last bit of humanity from Akane's heart until she is a broken shell of a woman. When that happens, he will move on to Ruri and do the same to her as he did to Akane. Until then, he is presenting herself as a friendly, awkward, hapless alien who just wants to help her out, so she lowers her guard and lets him in to seep her poison into her soul. Indeed, he's already begun dripping poison into her; after all, wasn't Ruri upset with herself for being jealous of his 'charge'? His charge, that he claimed he had to spend so much time on, and yet he was able to come instantly to Ruri's side when she called?
Kaworu understands all this with such chilling clarity that it makes him sick.
"We're your friends. We want to worry about you, because we care about you," he tells her gently, leaning forward half an inch. "Isn't that why you're telling us about this in the first place?"
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
What's a little more liquid, to a deep pool? Drip... drip... drip.
Ruri understands none of this; she's far too young, even clever as she is. Omoikane is even younger, but he has the benefit of not being Alexis's target -- and all the collected public knowledge of humanity, besides.
She leans forward, in mirror of him, one fey child to another. Or perhaps she just doesn't want to talk too loudly about it; she feels the secrecy which is part of Alexis, even though he's never told her to stay quiet. It's a secret, because he's not the sort of being who can exist in a crowd.
"Omoikane was worried, so I thought I'd better," Ruri explains, as if Omoikane's feelings are enough explanation just on their own. "Omoikane was worried about me showing Mr. Kerib my personnel file, too, but... he offered to help me figure out why the girl I wanted to be friends with was upset by it. It still isn't really clear to me, but..." Ruri pauses, here, for a delicate moment, all hollow-boned; the sentence peters out to nothing.
"Oh," she says, a moment later, blinking. Her realisation is dull as anything across her voice.
"Mr. Kerib thought something foolish as forgetting was fine because he'd rather forget... I should have realised." A hand clasps near her heart, a light frown crossing her face. "I suppose that's why he raised the option of retreating, too... it's not just because someone like me can't outlive my problems like he does. Well, I supposed space and time were analogous enough, but that's another aspect to escape, it seems."
Ruri sighs, her shoulders sinking down a little. "... actually, Kaworu-san, I feel a little bad for him. I suppose adults get even more foolish the older they become."
But is Alexis really the one she should be pitying?
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
There's something about Alexis that does invite secrecy, isn't there? Though in Kaworu's case, perhaps that's just the part of him that always needs to remain a secret, until it suddenly no longer is. They're both of them monsters, after all, in their own unique ways. It's just that Alexis uses his monsterhood at others's expense.
"The girl you wanted to be friends with?" Kaworu prompts when Ruri trails off. However, it soon becomes apparent that her thought actually wasn't finished, that there's something else there. Contents of a conversation to which he isn't privy. At the same time, it's not wholly incomprehensible.
Kaworu raises his eyebrows all the same. He waits, listening, until Ruri actually is finished speaking. "Understandable. There is certainly a lot about Alexis that would make one feel bad," he says neutrally. "But it sounds as though the two of you had an extended conversation of some kind. Is that what you were referencing, that time when he visited you recently here? I assume it's the conversation you hadn't yet mentioned to Omoikane... What all exactly did you discuss, if I might ask?"
Something he'd rather forget. There is certainly a time period Kaworu imagines that Alexis Kerib (read: Over Justice) would rather forget. But is that true? He brought up those times on his own, back when he administrated a zone for aliens... Is it simply because Kaworu knew him from back then, and there's no need for pretense with him? Or...
'Outlive my problems, like he does.' Like he does. "...Was that really a solution he proposed to you?"
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"We talked about what happened at the concert," so it was a concert Ruri went to, which is a devastatingly normal activity for a girl like her. "Whether I could trust Mr. Hoary's assessment of the danger, and why it happened... the history with the Zentradi, I mean. I looked it up." Encyclopaedias! She's got 'em.
"Mr. Kerib was impressed about my dutifulness and, well, how much I was worried about everyone... Miss Lee, in particular. Um, our new intern," she explains, a little on the back-foot, as she swings back to a question she didn't quite answer back then. "She's not that much older than me, and we have some similiar interests, so I thought it would be nice to be friends with her... unfortunately, something like this happened, so the event didn't go so well." She almost manages to mask her disappointment, at that.
(Almost.)
Ruri breathes out, looking up. "It's not that Mr. Kerib proposed something like that, really... he just pointed out that Nergal-san's invested a lot in me, so unless I withdrew fully and completely, I owed them my best effort. Well, he said things would change a lot if I did something like that... but even if the company would come get me, I don't want to leave, anyway. Omoikane is here... well, I suppose everyone else is, too."
She shakes her head, returning her attention to Kaworu, again. "Anyway, at that point I thought he might have withdrawn, himself... so we got to talking about how he experiences the world. He said unaddressed feelings grow into jewels," that's not the only word he used, "and he can see them perfectly well... I thought I might be difficult to find, since I'm not so expressive, but it seems in fact there's an inverse relationship between passion and visibility. Well, if it's all lights, I suppose that's why he prefers to meet me alone... it's hard to see, or something like that."
Omoikane radiates a subtle but present feeling of not buying it.
"That's why it's called being alien," Ruri supposes, mildly, in response to that scepticism. "It's hard to imagine things being so different, but it's not like that makes him a bad person. Most people wouldn't understand how I interact with the world, either..."
... and it's that touch of alienation which is why she gets along so well, with monsters.
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
'The concert.' Although Kaworu didn't attend--he couldn't, having been too bogged down with work--he did want to attend Sheryl Nome's pre-tour concert... especially since Shinji had gone with his other friends. Kaworu nods as Ruri describes what she researched and why. Although he recognizes the name 'Miss Lee,' he doesn't interrupt, though the corner of his mouth turns up slightly. Ranka had been disappointed with herself with letting Ruri down, and here Ruri seems disappointed that they didn't have more of a chance to be friends. They're both such kind people.
That slight hint of a smile fades as she continues. Unaddressed feelings... hm. He thinks of the kaiju that have appeared in Tsutsujidai so far, and his role in creating them. He chuckles a little at Omoikane's subtly expressed sense of nonsense, but falls silent again. Ruri is such a kind girl. She wants to give people the benefit of the doubt, doesn't she? Because she, too, knows what it's like to feel separated from others, even when surrounded by people, because of what you are and what you can do.
Once Ruri's done, first things first: "I actually met Ranka-san recently. She's a very sweet girl. She seemed very concerned about keeping her promises--I had the sense she felt guilty about disappointing someone else recently. I suppose that must have been you." His expression gentles. "She seems like she'll be a very good friend, if you still want to be friends with her."
Yes... Ruri and Ranka both seem like they'd be very good for each other. If they have each other...
"Though, I can't say I agree with the idea that you owe your all to an organization just because they've invested a lot into you," he adds mildly, leaning back in his seat. "I'm in a similar position, and I have no interest in submitting myself, body and soul, to a group that views me as little more than an ambulant tool. I do what I do because I want to protect the people I love." He shuts his eyes as he smiles. "To that end, I wouldn't mind betraying them outright. I don't owe them anything just because they made me."
There's no bitterness, anger, spite, or anything as he says so. It's freely stated and freely felt. Love is simply more important to him than obligation.
"I suppose it's possible that Alexis behaves the way he does because he has no one to love. But if he isn't interested in loving anyone or being loved by anyone, that's not something you can do anything about. Nor should you be expected to," he continues, meeting Ruri's gaze with that ever-present smile. "Be kind to him if you wish, but you are not in any way obligated to relieve him of his boredom just because he's been kind to you."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"She thought so..?" Ruri sounds surprised, to hear Ranka felt similarly -- perhaps she hasn't talked to her, since then. "I'd be happy, but..." But Ruri is the sort of person who invites conflict, she thinks, and Ranka is the sort of person who can't handle fighting at all. "... ahh, I'm being foolish," she chides herself, shaking her head, cutting off her complaints before she can make them. "I ought to be braver about things like that, like you, Kaworu-san. Though, I don't suppose I would have been able to try if you and the others hadn't asked to be my friend, too... it's not as if something like that just made sense to me."
It's its own kind of vulnerability, really, to admit that there are parts of her life she has no knowledge about, parts where she follows the example of the people around her.
Her arm crosses her chest, to grasp at her opposite arm; the frown on her face is pensive, as she listens to what Kaworu has to say. Once he finishes, she muses: "A tool they made, is it..? Functionally, I suppose that's an appropriate description... it seems there's a thin line between education for a certain purpose and a deliberate design. There's plenty of projects which treat orphans as a blank canvas, since no one would miss them, after all. And it's hard to deny I'm at the heart of the Nadesico, with Omoikane." Ruri looks down; there's the floor, but there are floors beneath this one, too, and she has the intuitive sense of their movement just the same. The breathing Nadesico is made of so many moving parts -- even if she is the only one, strictly speaking, equipped with lungs. "I suppose Nergal-san is a little entitled about me, all in all. It just never mattered to me too much. It didn't matter, really... there was no point to getting animated, because it didn't really affect me. I was busy with Omoikane... all I cared about was making sure their monitors didn't cause trouble for him."
Her disaffection makes perfect sense to her; she doesn't realise, to open senses, how clearly it displays as a defence. She is so perfectly neutral, so perfectly unmoved,
so perfect.
"Anyway," she shrugs, a little tug of her lip to a corner of her mouth, "I suppose these days I'm involved with the flying Nadesico... well, they're all incredibly foolish, but it's more interesting these days. I don't care terribly much about Nergal-san, though I wish they'd stop sending us such hot-shots... but if I could keep the Nadesico safe, I'd be happy with that." Or, translated from a more frigid hedgehog's dilemma: if she could protect the people she loves.
"... but I don't suppose Alexis isn't interested in it, Kaworu-san," Ruri adds, after a light pause. She can appreciate Kaworu's smile, even if she can't share it. "I think he still remembers the people he used to love... and he's trying to reach out to people, even though he doesn't know how to do that at all. That's why he found a girl who needs taking care of, I think," she says, and says it in just that way, unlike Ruri, who is perfectly strong on her own two feet. "He said he used to work in administration, so I suppose looking out for people is familiar to him... unfortunately, he's this clumsy about it."
Ruri certainly has the base-level impression that the people in her life are basically trustworthy. Acidic as she is, she does see the best in people.
Omoikane, insistently, chimes in:
< CARE ISN'T ISOLATING >
Which isn't to say Omoikane is a pessimist; just to say he's seen more of Ruri's emotions than anyone else, here.
She sighs, as her hand drops back to her lap. "Right... I suppose it's strange how he always questions whether the people around me are trustworthy. I guess it's suspicious that he keeps asking those questions, then raises the idea of retreating away from everyone... I wonder what happened to make him think that's a good solution." For Omoikane's sake, she can put that much distance between herself and the alien, but... there's an awful lot of softening descriptors, in her agreement.
"You're right, in any case," she directs her attention to Kaworu, again. (Ruri does not smile, but that's not anything strange.) "My only obligation is to the Nadesico."
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
"But?" Kaworu prompts, and smiles faintly when she calls herself foolish. "Interpersonal relationships are difficult for many people--including me. You say I'm brave about things like this, but even I have my cowardly side." His smile turns rueful and introspective as he averts his eyes. "...The more powerfully you wish for something, the more agonizing the prospect of failing to grasp it becomes." He laughs a little and raises his chin, eyes shut. "All the same, all one can do is one's best and accept the outcome, whatever that ends up being. On the bright side, you know that Ranka-san feels the same way. It makes it a little easier to reach your hand out, doesn't it?"
And of course, Ruri knows Ranka feels the same way because Kaworu told her. But that's not something Kaworu points out, because it's not really important in his view. The means are important, but what truly matters is the result.
For now, Ruri weighs in on education vs. design. Kaworu regards her as he listens in turn. Once again, he chuckles faintly, this time when she mentions that it never mattered to her too much. "We really are similar," he observes. They're not the same. But they are similar. Perhaps his acceptance of everything is its own sort of defense mechanism, just as her unaffectedness is for her. After all, why stress about what you can't change?
It's good that she does acknowledge that the crew of the Nadesico matters to her. It puts her one step closer to a less lonely life. Kaworu smiles as he nods at that--but pauses when Ruri speculates about Alexis and the people that matter to him. Or mattered, past tense. His eyes widen as his smile startles away. That's why he found a girl who needs taking care of, I think... He lowers his gaze as he touches his chin in thought. Is that why? For all his talk of needing no reasons, could it be that he...?
"I see," he says slowly. "You may be right, Ruri-san. I wonder... if he even realizes it himself."
Fortunately for both of them, Omoikane chimes in, and Kaworu breathes a faint little laugh. "He's right, you know. Someone who truly cares about you will want you to have more and more vibrant links. They shouldn't want to keep you all to themself." His gaze flicks down. Right. How foolish of him. That was the answer all along, wasn't it? He already knew for a long time. He shakes his head a little and focuses back on Ruri. "I imagine your crewmates would agree... though of course it would be best to ask them directly rather than assume. I don't know them nearly as well as you or Omoikane do, after all." He nods to the text display.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"I see... but wishing for something isn't bad, Kaworu-san. Even if it doesn't happen, wanting something is proof you're alive, so it's still good it happened... or something like that." Ruri pauses, and surmises, lightly: "Well, that's how this crew acts, anyway."
Ask Ruri about the current romantic crisis on infinite Nadesicos playing out in these halls. She knows so much about wishing for things that would never happen. (Most of which Minato told her, but this is not about that.) And even discounting romance, there's Uribatake's projects, or Erina's corporate ambitions, or Izumi's quest to get someone to laugh at her puns...
Plenty of things Ruri thinks are unlikely to happen. Even so, they're all doing their best.
(Well, maybe things with Ranka will go a little better.)
There are many things Ruri doesn't know, about people. In many ways, she's only operating on the knowledge they give her -- except for those ways her analytic brain fills in the gaps. (And, of course, her basic optimism about how people mean well for her, that the world fundamentally loves and supports her, even if horrible things are happening outside.) When Kaworu's smile shocks off his face, Ruri's head tilts, just so, to the side. "Maybe not," she supposes, lightly. "He's always talking about my feelings or her feelings in that situation... not his. Well, I suppose it's impolite to speculate." She says something like that after speculating, of course, but -- well, she still has a twelve-year-old's sense of restraint, interpersonally. That's the danger of a middle-school girl!
She shakes her head, finally; perhaps it's in mirror of Kaworu's motion. "I guess that's why Minato-san keeps pushing me to socialise with people outside the ship, even though I have work to do..." She's upgraded her familiarity with her at some point; perhaps it was Kaworu insisting on a first-name basis that had something to do with that. "Megumi-san's done that too, now and then, I suppose. They're foolish people, but they know more about this sort of thing..."
Ruri trails off, for a moment, hands coming to rest in her lap; she looks down to them, a pensive shadow over the wall of her face. "... living like this is better than being in the lab, anyway. Once I had Omoikane, it wasn't so bad... but for a long time, it was just us. I think we're both happier now we're living with people who aren't studying us."
Omoikane chimes in with a green checkmark:
< v/ >
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
Kaworu's expression warms even as it gentles. Wanting something is proof you're alive, so it's still good it happened... He laughs a little. "You're right. Thank you, Ruri-san." Living is a good thing, after all, isn't it? Life is precious, and he is someone who at least one person thought was worth surrendering that precious thing to protect. That was a long time ago, many, many universes ago, but... Listening to Ruri, it makes him think again of how he promised not to think such foolish thoughts as being unworthy of living again. He isn't such a good person that he could stop those thoughts entirely, but... at least now he's not so quick to surrender his own life. Life and death may be of equal value to him, but they aren't equal at all to those who love you.
Those who love him. It really is a heartening thought, imagining that such people exist. Maybe he's been overreacting a bit... letting his loneliness get the better of him.
"We're all foolish in at least some situations, I think," he says aloud. "Whether it's you, or me, or Minato-san or Megumi-san, or Shinji, or Alexis, or even the Second... But while we all have our foolish sides, we all have our pearls of wisdom, too." He leans his head on one hand, smile widening. "Being foolish isn't such a bad thing either, perhaps. It gives us a reason to rely on others. I'm sure Minato-san and Megumi-san, foolish as they are, are both very happy that they can support you."
He nods as she continues, and Omoikane 'voices' assent. "I agree. Being with others is much better than being alone," he replies. "If you two and I had stayed in our respective laboratories, we never would have met each other, either. This mixed-up, chaotic world may be frustrating sometimes, but... I'm truly glad to be here."
No matter how painful it may sometimes be.
"On that note, could I ask you two to introduce me to the rest of your crew?" he adds. "I've met some of them in passing, but we haven't really spoken much. I'd love to get to know the people you both care about better, if that's all right."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Ruri isn't, entirely, sure what to make of being thanked so warmly, but... it's not like it's a bad feeling, either. Her expression, in turn, gentles by degrees.
(She still doesn't smile, but maybe that's just how she is. Or how deep it goes.)
Still... relying on others... it's certainly something Ruri has observed, living here. (She has made many, many comments to herself, about how the Nadesico lives. Maybe someone will use them to contextualise what happened to the ship, one day... no, that's unlikely.) Maybe they just need each other (she just needs everyone) because they're (she's) too foolish to take care of things alone, but...
When the Admiral said this was their ship -- he was speaking inclusively, Ruri's sure. All of them still alive.
There must have been a reason for that.
She'll find the reason... for that.
So she nods, caught between her reflections and his; those pools aren't so different, fey children all raised in laboratories. Gently, she observes those ripples, and says: "Somehow, I'm happy, too."
(Ruri doesn't expect to be happy, when her default feeling is detached boredom. Call it a flaw of a perfect system.)
She leans forward, a little, when Kaworu goes on to ask that question. "You want to meet everyone..? Well, don't expect too much, but I suppose that's fine." The scepticism in her voice doesn't quite match her receptive body language, the way she stands and gestures to Kaworu, hand flapping up and down a few times to indicate he ought follow. "Since we're at dock, we shouldn't be interrupting anyone..."
And so, Ruri takes Kaworu through the ship for an EXTENDED MEET-AND-GREET, and it turns out that many of the people here are very happy to see Ruri's made a friend all on her own. Of course, he gets a couple of questions about whether he's her older brother, particularly from some of the boys in blue who don't interact with Ruri as much day-to-day. (It must be the hair, or the general fae bearing.) But even with that mistake cleared up, it's quite clear that the people here are supportive of their youngest crewmember, even if not all of them can really understand her. If she's made a friend in NERV, she must be making progress..!