2022-02-16: Dreisstrager's Hollow 'Heart'
- Log: Dreisstrager's Hollow 'Heart'
- Cast: Mitsuba Greyvalley, Ruri Hoshino
- Where: The Dreisstrager (Orb Union)
- Date: 2022-02-16
- Summary: Ruri visits the Dreisstrager. What powers it is anathema to her. She tries to reach Mitsuba about her concerns -- and Mitsuba tries to be kind to Ruri, in turn.
<Pose Tracker> Mitsuba Greyvalley has posed.
The Dreisstrager handles a lot of coordination tasks for Nergal -- the Nadesico was gone for a good, healthy while, and the Dreisstrager has, since its impromptu maiden voyage, intermittently filled the gaps. Now, of course, Nergal would rather have a ship slightly less directly attached to G-Hound in that role -- which means that Mitsuba has a bunch of boring data about the Earth Sphere that she finally needs to offload to the Nadesico.
It's honestly not that interesting -- but some of it is sensitive, which means a physical, face-to-face handoff of a bunch of servers and documents is required. Which of course falls to a specific person's Computer-Related Duties.
Mitsuba is there at one of the hangars to greet Ruri, of course. She is extremely together, extremely punctual, and -- despite her best efforts -- a little frazzled. She's juggling a lot, now.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Ruri is many things -- an excellent singer, a poor socialite, twelve -- but amongst them, the duties of the sysop are vested in her. The person who stopped no less than four people from setting their passwords to 'Password', as if the uppercase letter was the big gamechanger and she wouldn't notice? That's Ruri. The person who gives the bridge crew presentations on not picking up abandoned data sticks and putting them into a free slot just to see what's on there? Ruri. The person who makes sure data gets screened before it's integrated into the onboard computers? Actually, that one's mostly Omoikane, but he'd probably go on strike if Ruri was out of the picture, so we'll call it close enough.
Anyway, that's why Ruri gets flown over to the Dreisstrager. Normally, she'd take their shuttle, the Hinagiku, with someone willing to drive her -- but with the Dreisstrager as it is, it's the Nadesico which parks in its hangars. Quite comfortably, really.
Ruri has no minder, when she disembarks; this is entirely in her wheelhouse, after all. She's short, but she's dressed in a Nergal uniform, regardless -- it must be tailored to her, because it's eminently unlikely there are many employees as small and slight as Ruri is. Her white-blue hair is all up in twintails, two separate types of bangs framing her face, pale skin and too-gold eyes.
She's a strange girl, and a strange choice, but her ID checks out. This is definitely the Nadesico's systems operator.
And it is no sooner that she sets foot on the Dreisstrager proper that the bad feeling Ruri has had since they docked comes right to the forefront of her mind.
She looks left, looks right. The hangar is huge, of course. Perhaps someone like her just feels... particularly dwarfed. There's something vaguely unsettled, to her habitually neutral expression, as she finishes the walk to where the Captain is meeting her.
Before her, she stands, and -- doesn't salute, but the Nadesico is a civilian craft, after all. "Captain Greyvalley," she confirms, voice even. "Ruri Hoshino, Nadesico Systems Operator. Is everything all right?" That's not what the social script calls for her to say; she's supposed to say something about how she's ready to receive their equipment.
Maybe she noticed how frazzled Mitsuba looks, too.
<Pose Tracker> Mitsuba Greyvalley has posed.
Mitsuba quickly puts herself the rest of the way together when she sees Ruri actually arrive in a fairly large conference room just off the hangar -- seemingly recently expanded; it was fairly clearly recently two conference rooms, and the ceiling is open to the area above it toward... another conference room??? -- and address her.
She has a lot of things piled up -- it's probably about what Ruri expects, in terms of piled up documentation. More importantly, though -- back to Mitsuba!
It's like she simply decides to be 10% more together than she was a second ago. "Ah -- Miss Hoshino, yes?" She gives a small, content smile, affirming, "I'm fine. I just have a tendency to wear myself out a little on the ship." She looks Ruri over once, and says, "Let me take a moment to make sure everything's here, one last time," before turning away.
When she turns away, she brings her hands, balled up into tiny fists, up to her mouth to stop herself from squealing. ... so cute...!!! The twintails, the perfectly tailored little uniform...! Fwaaaa...!!
It'd be rude to actually inflict that feeling on Ruri, though, so it's not until she's evened herself out a bit that she turns back around. "Welcome to the Dreisstrager. It's not as well-armed as the Nadesico -- all we have are the usual particle cannons, albeit quite large... but it's the best hope for peace and freedom in our world."
The ship itself seems to agree. The ship itself is a big fan of that phraseology.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Conference rooms are still pretty big, when you're Ruri's size. Ruri, conveniently, is always Ruri's size.
"Yes," she confirms her identity, simply. The server racks and printouts all check out, to her eyes; the Captain pulling herself together does, too. (Well, so long as she's aware she ought to be alert, Ruri supposes she can forgive it.) There's something she says, in her excuses, which bothers her, but she can't quite put her finger on it.
She has some time to think about it, at least, as Mitsuba turns away to check the equipment. Ruri tilts her head, a little, because it strikes her as passing strange this wouldn't have been checked before they got here. But... maybe she's just being thorough.
(Ruri has no clue, of course. This is 'the innocence of youth'.)
When she turns back around to introduce her ship, though -- there's something about the end of that sentence which strikes Ruri, less like an idea and more like flint to steel.
There's a moment of hesitation, there, between that strange feeling, and Ruri's response.
"I understand you have your own advantages, despite your lack of weaponry," Ruri says, and when she speaks, she's entirely professional. "Technical Chief Hawkins has discussed some of your advancements with the AOS with me over official channels." Obviously, she asked her to call her Mayvy, but that doesn't apply when talking directly to her boss, as far as Ruri is concerned. "It sounds to be a very impressive system."
<Pose Tracker> Mitsuba Greyvalley has posed.
"It is, yes," Mitsuba says; she's all business now, after the initial outburst of 'oh no... she's babie'. "Ms. Zoldark called the Dreisstrager a 'ship of ships,' and there's some truth to that. At 2021 meters and the capacity to dock ships within itself, the Dreisstrager has the capacity to serve as very nearly a fleet in its own right. Even with those bays empty, it outstrips the Dolos-class on hangar space without making the Dolos's offensive sacrifices."
Centering herself firmly, she continues, "The AOS performs a large array of essential support tasks. It effectively replaces a CIC entirely, and can handle distributing that information to essentially the entire task force -- it is a perfect information conduit between the battlefield, our forces, and myself." Mitsuba seems to find rattling this off pretty soothing. "On top of that, that same processing power, when we're not engaged, can be put toward optimizing maintenance and upgrade cycles in the hangar, printing modular gear, and even investment banking." A beat, before Mitsuba admits: "... We... aren't an earner for Nergal, Mayvy's archaeology hobby aside. I'm not even sure we're value-neutral; if it didn't, we... would probably be a money sink." It's that brief moment of the human, the complete, where Mitsuba seems most embarrassed by the whole situation.
After a moment of thought, Mitsuba takes a moment to address Ruri more personally. "Have you been holding up well...? Nergal seems to rely on the Nadesico a lot. I was surprised to hear about you running the Big Barrier months ago, actually. I wonder why they were so insistent on making that move so soon..."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"It's certainly the last word in Nergal's deployment strategy," is Ruri's dry summation of the Dreisstrager's sheer size. Still, she listens to her description, attentive. Connecting Mitsuba in that way... hmm.
She gives Mitsuba a bit of a sceptical look, when she lists of investment banking. Apparently, she doesn't even need to vocalise how idiotic that is for her to realise it's a little embarrassing. What a timesaver!
Ruri looks back, to the door leading out to the hangar, Nadesico still sitting there. She looks back, to Mitsuba, a moment later. "We've been operating sufficiently," is her report, dull as an unshined plate. "Nergal-san are always giving us new surprises, but we find ourselves more than enough trouble on our own time."
She pauses, for a light moment, before she goes on: "You have clearance, so I suppose it's fine to tell you the company wasn't just on a mercy mission. When we got to Mars, Mr. Prospector was quite insistent on checking on company projects they had to abandon... well, he had a good excuse, but I suppose he'd have an excuse regardless of the situation." Ruri shrugs, lightly; she doesn't look terribly bothered, but she doesn't look much of anything, really.
(Some things can't be addressed so easily.)
"Maybe it's possible we would have gone to Mars even if there were no refugees stranded there. Well," she disregards the topic, blandly, "I wouldn't know anything about that. I'm just a young lady, after all."
One may get the impression here that Ruri knows a great much more than she lets on, for being a child, but it's convenient enough to say she doesn't see what she's seeing.
"But I'll admit I'm curious about your computer system," Ruri says, after a moment. "Nergal's adoption of various AI models is of interest to me." It's not a lie, technically, which makes it the best kind of lie. "Would you mind if I saw the AOS, Captain Greyvalley? Of course, you'll find I also have clearance for virtual data systems." It's all very above-board. Ruri is a very honest girl, for all she knows how to lie better than her best friend, and wouldn't ask Mitsuba to do anything untoward.
<Pose Tracker> Mitsuba Greyvalley has posed.
"That's true that it would seem to be the last word, though conversely, it's..." Mitsuba furrows her brow slightly. "The Nadesico is a design that Nergal seems to be quite comfortable iterating on. Despite how much G-Hound has seen fit to invest in a ship that supposedly lacks Overtechnology and performs such extensive functions, Nergal hasn't bothered to iterate forward. At best, it's moved some of the design lessons learned from the Dreisstrager back into things like the Cosmos... though that project is actually classified to me, so I could be wrong on the timeline."
She glances toward the door. "If everything is to your satisfaction with what we've gathered up, I can have some of the crew wheel all this to the Nadesico while we go to the AOS room." Pausing, Mitsuba pulls out her PDA, checking it. "... Yes, okay -- Mayvy should be asleep," she says, with a small smile. "If she isn't, at any rate, I'm going to be upset, because she needs it. It should just be the two of us in the AOS room, if we go now."
She gives Ruri a few moments to check the assembled goods, just to be sure everything is above board, and then starts moving. She seems like she expects to be walked with.
After a moment's thought, she asks, "How are you liking the Haro? Mayvy mentioned she'd given you one -- she seems to have taken quite a shine to you, as Nergal personnel go. If we weren't already -- if anything -- overloaded with technical staff, I'd have had half a mind to ask if you could be transferred over here..."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"They're capitalising on their discoveries, I suppose," Ruri supposes, lightly, and doesn't quite get to clarifying what she means by that description. "The Nadesico-class can be considered gravitational specialists, with particular inroutes to applied physics... the artificial gravity alone is something they'd consider worth iterating on, leaving aside the destructive potential of the Gravity Blast Cannons." Ruri is quite sure she doesn't have to explain why artificial gravity is an attractive development prospect.
The costs saved on sensitive equipment not being jostled everywhere is worth it all on its own, from a corporate perspective. Ruri is aware of the corporate perspective, even if she finds it foolish. She isn't quite so aware of the hurt feelings she might be hearing, in the background of that frustration.
Speaking of sensitive equipment being jostled around: Ruri goes over to investigate the server racks, and make sure everything is packed appropriately. "This all seems ready to transport," she says, after a few moments poking through it to make sure the louts in Engineering won't break anything. "Thank you for seeing to it so thoroughly, Captain Greyvalley."
She files away the fact that Mayvy isn't very good at sleeping in her mind, and makes a mental note to ask her about it the next time she appears on the network at a strange hour.
(Never mind that Ruri is also signed on at strange hours. That's just shift work!)
Mitsuba can expect Ruri to walk with her, though she has to hurry a little faster than Mitsuba does, just because she has much shorter legs. She makes no comment on this. "Oh --" Her answer is diverted, with surprise, as Mitsuba drops that last line. "No, no, that's not possible, Captain Greyvalley." There's a shade of nervousness to her voice, as if Ruri had never actually anticipated that possibility. Let alone coming here -- "Um, Omoikane needs me, so... that is, the Nadesico needs me to operate it sufficiently." Nice save, Ruri!
"But-- but Archimedes is doing very well," she hurries on, as if that could distract Mitsuba from asking questions. "She's integrated the onboard encyclopedia, so she can be very helpful. Unfortunately, not everyone appreciates her quite so much, so she isn't allowed on the bridge any more... but, she likes to go to the kitchens and help Ms. Howmei's girls by pulling up recipes while I'm working."
Ruri grows more animated as she talks about her New Robot Buddy. It's a subtle shift -- a little more engagement in her eyes, a little more reactivity to her voice. She doesn't quite smile, but her face doesn't look quite so severe, either.
Maybe, she thinks, her bad feelings aren't anything bad. After all, Archimedes came from the Dreisstrager, too. She'll just ask the AOS what this ominous feeling is about. She's sure it will know what she means.
<Pose Tracker> Mitsuba Greyvalley has posed.
Two distinct feelings briefly conflict in Mitsuba's head -- but in the end, the one that respects Ruri's autonomy wins out. She spots the distress despite the fact that Ruri is doing the best to couch it in practicals, and takes a moment to adjust her speed. "Of course," she says, voice turning just a hair softer. It's almost motherly. "You play an essential role in the functioning of the Nadesico. ... I think Mayvy would get territorial, anyway."
Mitsuba does her best to keep a slow, measured pace; at first, she tries to lead Ruri to one of those hallways with the handles on the side for zipping around in zero gravity. Unfortunately: they are in gravity! Force of habit. Mitsuba diverts to the next hallway, which has one of those enormous conveyor-belt-slash-treadmill people movers you usually see in airports.
It's a big ship.
The talk about the Haro actually has Mitsuba animated. "I've never actually owned a Haro of my own, though there's a certain nostalgia to them... It's not that I -- well. I was born on Side 7," she says, with a vague gesture. "It's hard not to feel a little bit of third-order attachment to them, by way of Amuro Ray..." She startles. "Ah -- not that I knew him. I was three when we moved." ... she's not that old.
She gets back to actually talking about the Haro. "It sounds nice that she's so helpful," Mitsuba says, of Archimedes. "That type of thing, too, falls under the AOS's umbrella sometimes -- but it would be nice to have a more specialized support for cafeteria operations..."
They approach the AOS room -- though it might be another minute or two yet.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Something about Mitsuba, in that reversal, kind of reminds Ruri of Minato. She can't quite put her finger on it, though... well, there are worse people she could remind her of, she supposes.
Thankfully, Mitsuba doesn't walk too fast, so Ruri doesn't have to hurry that much. "Ah... what's that?" Ruri asks, of the handles. Since she's only ever deployed in one of those rare ships with full artificial gravity...
... Ruri has never seen a zipline!
She gets on the people conveyer belt, instead. Mitsuba, in Ruri's mind, is firmly placed as An Adult -- that mysterious meridian somewhere around sixteen-to-eighteenish whereby someone suddenly stops being a child and grows up. She doesn't really have much of a concept of gradients of Adulthood, because everything past being an Adult simply makes one an Adult. The twenties are as ancient to her as the fifties. This is the tragedy of youth!
Which is to say: Ruri finds it strange that Mitsuba wouldn't know Amuro, at first glance, because they're both Adults. It's only when she engages her history brain that she realises the discrepancy. "Oh," Ruri files it away, in the wake of that startle. "Okay." Is she a little disappointed..? Surely not.
She nods, though, with a gentle expression, as Mitsuba compliments her Haro. "Omoikane helps them out a lot," Ruri says, forgetting, again, not to mention her AI friend somewhere the company is keeping notes. "But Archimedes wants to teach people things, so we thought it would be a good place for her to help. She's very happy there." Maybe it's no wonder a child would anthropomorphise her Haro! She is of that age, after all.
All a sudden, Ruri shivers. There's a shine to her hair, briefly. Blink, and you'll miss it.
"It's... a little cold here, Captain Greyvalley," Ruri says, a hand reaching up to rub at her opposite arm.
That's not why she has goosebumps, all a sudden. But maybe it's the closest approximation.
<Pose Tracker> Mitsuba Greyvalley has posed.
"Oh -- that's for movement in zero gravity. You grip the handle and press your thumb into the top, and it'll drag you along. The Dreisstrager can have artifical gravity, but we don't run it at all times -- it's a bit of a power draw." Mitsuba is happy to explain the particulars, again. "As the AOS gets more efficient about power management, we'll be able to run it all the time, of course. The ship's reactor is actually rated for a much larger maximum draw, but it's not very efficient yet."
After seeing a lot of the wonders Mayvy can work, Mitsuba's inclined to treat Ruri's treatment of Archimedes as a person totally seriously. She's not really interested in delineating Categories Of Person, so instead, she muses, "Your cooks must be delighted to have all the help."
Still, though, more detailed mention of Omoikane gets her thinking. "The Nadesico and the Dreisstrager operate so similarly, but the differences... it feels like they're totally different takes on the same goal. Is Nergal that well-staffed, lately, that it can afford to test and develop in parallel...? I'd have guessed Morgenroete was involved too, but to all accounts they're tied up in the G-Project."
Thinking about Nergal's vast research resources makes her remember she's standing outside the AOS room like a dork. "... Really? I haven't noticed anything, but I suppose it's necessary to keep operating temperatures low," Mitsuba thinks aloud, before finally carding in.
The AOS room is a little on the dark side. Lots of empty monitoring chairs at several consoles. Dozens of holographic displays. "Here you are," she says, brightly. "Feel free to take your time. I don't know if I'll be able to answer your questions very well..."
The AOS does not really feel like a computer-person in the way Ruri expects. It certainly performs computing. You can look at it the way you look at a computer, whatever that way is. It may be one of the first things Ruri has encountered that really feels like a 'dumb' computer in the way everyone but Ruri seems to look at computers.
It might equally be compared to a painted eggshell.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"Oh, I see," Ruri says, looking quite interested in the zero-gravity innovation, really. "I've never seen one in person before." She's familiar with the theory! But then, Ruri is familiar with the theory of a lot of things. "The AOS must be learning very quickly," she remarks.
She nods, when Mitsuba makes that note about their kitchens. "I think Ms. Howmei's girls like her," she says. Well, Archimedes is very cute.
"The only functional limit to parallel development is cost and manpower," Ruri notes. "And the Nadesico was staffed through recruitment of talented civilians with liberal approaches to cost. So long as there are gifted people who can be bought, Nergal-san will have the capacity to expand their fleet." She says this entirely dryly, as if it hardly matters, to her.
Standing outside the AOS's room, Ruri excuses it with, "oh, of course." All lower-case, all distant. Someone like her must know about keeping supercomputers cool.
She steps inside -- she makes herself step inside -- and she has a terrible feeling, as she goes to the console, as she lays a hand on it, as she asks: What's wrong?
Her hand falls on the console; her hand raps on the shell.
Her eyes widen -- flash, in the darkness. Rings all indicating power fed to the unit, hair more white than blue, the light cutting through, brightening her hair-ties.
It last only moments. Moments she takes to tear through its existence, to search for any shred of itself, screaming into empty halls.
BLOCK ALLOCATION DIRECTORY LOST
READ ERROR
ACCESS PHYSICAL ADDRESS
READ ERROR
DATA LINK REQUEST
READ ERROR
WHAT ARE YOU
WHAT ARE YOU
WHAT ARE YOU
WHAT ARE YOU
WHAT ARE YOU
WHAT ARE YOU
WHAT ARE YOU
WHAT ARE YOU
WHAT ARE YOU
WHAT ARE YOU
WHAT ARE YOU
She lifts her hand. She steps, staggers back. Her hair falls back into place, too.
She didn't mean to be so forceful. She didn't, really. She didn't mean to use force, except --
Except everything she turned over returned the same dull response.
Except everything she queried had the same soulless response.
Except everything she followed had the same purposeless response.
She stares, numb, into the middle distance between the AOS and the wall.
... Ruri has met toasters with more life to them than this supercomputer, the breathing heart of the Dreisstrager. It's not right. It's not right. It's not
it's not.
She isn't, either, all bird-bone trembling, staring, still and wordless.
<Pose Tracker> Mitsuba Greyvalley has posed.
Mitsuba nods, at the assertion of the speed. "It's already started doing a lot on its own," she says. "I can't say I'm the happiest with the frequency with which things start to disappear from our manifests and get turned into upgrade parts based more on its whim than ours, but..."
All that banging on the heart of the Dreisstrager and Ruri gets absolutely nothing in response. There's something that shifts in Mitsuba's demeanor, in turn, as Ruri's eyes seem to flash -- as her whole mien, everything about her, seems to orient on assessing the Dreisstrager, Mitsuba in turn shifts uneasily.
Ruri's blank stare prompts two distinct feelings in Mitsuba -- feelings that go to war, very briefly, with themselves. In the end, though...
"... You look unwell," Mitsuba says, softly. "I think you might be a little overwhelmed..." She reaches tentatively for Ruri. She doesn't -- quite -- touch her, though she leaves her room to settle into having an arm around her if she decides she wants it. (After giving her several seconds, if Ruri doesn't take that, Mitsuba takes a half-step back. She doesn't want to create an expectation.)
She doesn't interface with computers in the same way. What's really happening here... that's totally beyond her.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Mitsuba said it makes decisions. Mitsuba said it's learning. And Mayvy has described it precisely like a curious machine in the past, too. So it doesn't make any sense!
What are you? What are you? What are you? What are you? The words drum through her head, the only one with ears to hear them. She can comprehend rejection, the way the Evangelion unit rejected her. She can comprehend having secrets, the way the Huckebeins did. She can comprehend complicated reactions, like what Asciel presented versus what she projected underneath.
All those things make sense to her. They are ways of living, even if they can't open themselves to her.
This is...
Her mouth moves, and doesn't form words, for a moment. "No," she manages, finally. "Not me." And it isn't overwhelmed. It's -- "Hollow."
She jump-startles, as she realises just how close Mitsuba is reaching for her. She takes a step back, her hands grasping her elbows, arms a barrier between herself and the Dreisstrager.
"I," Ruri starts, "can't be here." It has nothing to do with being rejected. There is nothing here to reject her.
But now she has listened -- now she is listening -- all she can hear is the echo, down an empty hall.
How does something which is nothing build and learn? How is it possible? How can it be --
"... I want to go home," Ruri says, sounding, for the first time today, like the miserable child she is.
<Pose Tracker> Mitsuba Greyvalley has posed.
... Well, Mitsuba thinks. It makes sense. Ruri's ultimately a child, and she's been tasked with important task after important task -- and horrible task after horrible task, at that. (Mitsuba reads. She doesn't have full clearance regarding Mars. But Mitsuba reads, and she knows enough to know that -- even without seeing the sausage being made -- just experiencing Mars as it was last year in any capacity is enough to churn something vile into someone's mental landscape.)
She takes a few moments to pull away. "... I'll escort you back to the Nadesico, if you like," she offers, tone more gentle. Whatever might have momentarily possessed her to be more firm about this -- something she was thinking, starting around the time she reached out -- seems to recede. Ruri is leaving. That's good. That's preferable to her staying here, if she's so miserably overwhelmed.
Still, there's... a stiffness to her, about it. It's not that it's ungentle or unthoughtful but the whole situation just feels kind of weird and janky all around. Mitsuba clearly wants to provide Ruri with warmth and safety, and that's even a normal way for her to approach someone, but, just...
Well. At any rate, she seems more-than-fine with escorting Ruri back to the Nadesico.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Ruri doesn't feel safe here. Is it fair? Is it fair for her to read danger into nothing at all, the same rote routines which anyone else would see if they examined a program?
It might not be entirely fair, but she had a good reason to jump away from those movements, even entirely outside of Ruri's aversion to touch. She remembers the order of operations, how they flowed to the Captain.
She follows Mitsuba back to the Nadesico, and Ruri is stiff, too, arm-crossed and glancing back and forth. Is it because the ship is so large that everything echoes off itself?
It's only once they return to the Nadesico's entrance, laid out in the hangar, that Ruri unfolds at all. Even then, it takes long moments for her to reach out, reach up, grasp a fistful of Mitsuba's cape in her small and trembling hand.
"Wait," Ruri says, halfway to whining, the word a plea all made from finest glass. Brush it, and it shatters. It isn't easy for her.
She looks aside, as if that could hide the unease, in her eyes. "Can you come inside? Just for a minute..."
<Pose Tracker> Mitsuba Greyvalley has posed.
As they get further from the AOS's core, Mitsuba settles into a much more comfortable rhythm. She quickly finds the distance Ruri is most comfortable having her, and stays within about 5 centimeters of that band at all times; she keeps her hands to herself without closing off her body language; she pointedly matches Ruri's overall speed.
It's when they get to the Nadesico -- firmly in Omoikane's sphere of influence, even docked with the Dreisstrager -- that Mitsuba seems most comfortable. She's almost ready to leave, letting Ruri get back where she feels safe, when --
'Wait.'
There's that hand in her cape. "... Okay," she says, softly. "I can do that." She lets Ruri take point on how far into the Nadesico she's led, on how exactly this goes. Something occurs to her, as they get there, too; she actually takes a proactive step to worry, here: "... Do you want this mentioned to the Nadesico's crew? I can keep a secret, if you'd rather," she says, gently. She can tell Ruri likes to maintain her presence as Very Adult, and can draw the conclusion that this would put a serious cramp in her style if anyone knew this was how a routine data exchange went.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
So, in the end, Ruri had a minder after all.
She's able to relax a little -- a little -- when she can feel Omoikane's influence, by the Nadesico. He's person-shaped, in just the way the AOS isn't.
She releases Mitsuba's cape, as soon as she's gotten her attention, pulls her hand back into her space. She waves a hand -- up and down, in the Japanese style -- as she leads Mitsuba through the cargo bay, up through the halls, further back --
"They wouldn't understand," she dismisses the idea of telling her crew. "It's," safer, "better if you don't tell them."
Ruri is very good at one particular type of lying. Honest as she is, she can't bald-facedly lie. But creatively disclosing facts -- well. She says it's better if Mitsuba doesn't tell the Nadesico what happened. She doesn't say anything about herself.
And where she was taking her --
The Main Control Room sits at the heart of the Nadesico's back half, but that's not the reason Ruri brought Mitsuba here. No -- the reason is the solid core a room away, one of Omoikane's several backup systems strewn throughout the ship. The place where his consciousness is strongest.
(Behind them, she feels the Phase Transition Engines, humming away.)
Ruri swallows, turning to Mitsuba. There is fear, in her eyes -- fear which overcomes even her stoic exterior, crashing against the walls of her, the same walls which made sure Mitsuba had to work to keep five centimetres within Ruri's comfort range. She is afraid -- of? for? -- Mitsuba, Captain of the Dreisstrager.
She says: "... Captain Greyvalley," slowly, shaken, "your computer system isn't. It's -- it isn't," Ruri repeats, hapless, frustrated. "It's wearing -- it's covered by -- it computes. It calculates. But it has no heart, Captain Greyvalley. I don't know what it is. But I can't reach it," Ruri insists, strained.
She is all a sudden all too aware of the fact it's just the three of them, here. She takes a step back, visibly -- visibly -- nervous.
"Please," she says, and isn't sure what she's bargaining for, in that moment. She settles on: "be very careful, Captain Greyvalley. The reason Nergal won't repeat the Dreisstrager -- it's important you realise it."
<Pose Tracker> Mitsuba Greyvalley has posed.
Mitsuba lets herself be drawn fully into the heart of the Nadesico. It's a curious thing -- being on a ship that isn't hers. It happens, periodically -- it just happened recently, with Orbit Base. It's a bit of a weight off her shoulders, sometimes, but at other times it mostly makes her want to go back.
She lets Ruri lead her to the safest-feeling place that she can; she wouldn't refuse Ruri in a situation like this. The most important thing to her, right now, is that Ruri feels comfortable with the situation. "I understand," Mitsuba agrees. (There's part of her that doesn't. But she can keep a secret, if it makes Ruri feel more comfortable, happier, safer.)
Ruri finally gets around to what she intends to say. The Dreisstrager... has no heart? The AOS... hm. She weighs that for several seconds. It's clearly enough to deeply upset Ruri; Mitsuba should take it seriously. When Ruri steps back, Mitsuba does too, perfectly content to give her her space.
"... Very well," she says, tone soft. She's out of her depth on this one -- the Dreisstrager, to her, is no less than the entire Earth's protection. To Ruri... whatever it is is something deeply scary. Nevertheless -- she can take that burden on too. "... I'll bring it up with Commodore Fikes. As the project sponsor, I'm sure he'll be forthright with me."
"... This is the Nadesico's heart, yes?" she asks, pivoting to a topic that Ruri probably feels safer with. "... I like it. I probably can't feel it the way you do, but..."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
There's something different, between the Mitsuba who steps back to give Ruri her space, and the Mitsuba who hovered as close as Ruri would allow her. Ruri can't entirely place the difference -- but she aware, on some level, it's there.
"Okay," she says, when Mitsuba agrees to bring it up. She pushes no further. (No: she is afraid of pushing further.)
She nods, a hand coming up to clasp, in loose grasp, near to her shoulder. She's not sure she can trust Mitsuba, but -- but she told Asciel it wasn't wrong to reach out, so maybe she has to model that, too. "We're by one of Omoikane's backups," she explains, glancing back to the wall. "Though, what you can physically feel is probably the Phase Transition engines... we're not so far away from them here." They're not terribly active, right now, parked as the Nadesico is, but that doesn't mean they've turned off. They're just idling.
"I... I'll explain," she says, glancing aside, as if embarrassed that she didn't before. "I'm a person who can reach electronics... I know how they feel. I can... communicate with them. I've always been gifted that way... so, that's why I'm here, with the Nadesico. Because I'm someone who can... bridge computers and humanity," she adopts the word Asciel used, back then. "So I'm able to operate the Nadesico's systems on a different level to anyone else."
She pauses. She evaluates. She goes on: "The Huckebeins had feelings... they were strange, and they didn't want to reveal everything, but they responded to me. Archimedes has feelings, too. So I never expected... I knew something wasn't right," Ruri shakes her head, a little. (The first thing she asked, after all --) "... but, when I was with the AOS, I saw it the way you see computers. I tried very hard to reach it, but I couldn't... it didn't even not want to talk to me. It was like... there wasn't anything to talk to..." Her teeth rest, lightly, against her bottom lip -- to stop it from trembling, or as some childish little way to hold her hand without doing anything so obvious. One or the other.
"That's not how it's supposed to be," Ruri says, entirely earnest, looking up to Mitsuba with those wide gold eyes. "When I'm in the Nadesico, I can feel everything. All our systems are operating normally. We're not in threat alert, or actively scanning. The engines are currently idling and producing general power to our living systems. We're currently sending out communication signals... I suppose Ms. Reinard is talking to the Dreisstrager, or something like that. It's... it's not like I know that much about every system," she adds, a moment's hesitation. "But I know Omoikane very well, so I know when the Nadesico is in trouble. There are many things happening... Omoikane feels many things about it." Ruri carefully elects not to divulge his feelings about this conversation.
"I know it might not make any sense, but... I hope you can understand, Captain Greyvalley."
<Pose Tracker> Mitsuba Greyvalley has posed.
Ruri explains herself to Mitsuba. It's... a remarkable show of vulnerability. Mitsuba shifts her posture down to meet her, a little bit, while also taking another half-step back -- doing her best to show that she wants to meet Ruri as an equal without crowding her. It's a careful, precise sort of move, but a warm one, too.
"Thank you," Mitsuba says, when Ruri says she'll explain. "I know I don't see the world the way you see it, so I'd be happy to listen."
She does. She listens. "Hmmm," Mitsuba murmurs, when Ruri says that despite her strong abilities as a technopath, she couldn't make any kind of connection with the Dreisstrager. And not even the flatness of rejection -- just... nothing?
Mitsuba thinks about that for a long time. It's the Captain's responsibility to deal with every element of the ship, after all. "No, I think I understand, if only by inference," she answers, eventually. "I can't promise it isn't the normal workings of the ship, but... I hear what you have to say. I'll do my best to find out about it, and I'll tell you what I know. I hope what I find out... I don't know if it'll put you at ease, but it might at least make it make sense."
She lets her eyes close for a moment. "... Thank you for telling me. I think it's good to tell people when you're worried, or scared, or you don't understand something." Opening them again, she murmurs, "It's not doing what you can, the best you can if you bottle those things up. You can't address an unspoken problem."
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
Ruri thinks, in a way, it would serve her right if Mitsuba didn't understand. But Mitsuba doesn't react nearly as badly as she did -- and so, Ruri is surprised, to see her shifting down, to hear her thanking her. Her eyes widen, just so; her hand lifts, from where it was pressed in against her shoulder.
Not quite reaching out to her, but less not doing that, too.
There's something deeply horrifying, to Ruri, about the idea that the AOS's vacuous construction is normal working conditions. Her fingers curl in; she frowns, lightly. But Mitsuba promises to investigate, and something about her approach makes Ruri believe she can rely on that. "Okay," she says, again.
And now it's Ruri's turn to consider what Mitsuba is saying, because, in a way, this isn't the first time Ruri has heard it. Many times, from many people -- Omoikane included -- she has heard the idea that she should reach out, she should talk to people, she shouldn't try and do it all herself.
(There's one person who said just the opposite, but if no one agrees with Asuka, her advice is ultimately a little suspect as far as Ruri is concerned.)
"... I see," Ruri says, finally. Slowly, cautiously, she takes a step back towards Mitsuba. "I do want to do my best. I don't really understand how to solve human problems, but... I think that if you can save someone, you should." The same words she offered Kaworu, back then. She stands by them.
... it's the kind of logic which might hit more severely than it sounds, with the background of the Nadesico's mission to Mars.
(And in repeating them, Ruri says more than she means to say about the danger she sees surrounding Mitsuba.)
<Pose Tracker> Mitsuba Greyvalley has posed.
Straightening up, a bit, once Ruri starts to move closer -- but not all the way up just yet -- Mitsuba does what she can, the best she can. "I agree with that," she says, a twinkle in her eye a bit. "We're in a very complex era, but... I think as long as we don't lose sight of a kinder, more unified world, we'll be able to save a lot of people."
Now she straightens all the way out. "I'm going to return to the ship and make sure our records transfer is complete, and then call my superior officer to ask about the AOS," she explains. "I haven't put in a direct call since we launched... I think he'll be willing to explain to me. If I learn anything that would explain this, I'll contact you as soon as possible. I'll make Mayvy aware as well."
She doesn't step back yet. Rather, she says, "If there's anything else you'd like to ask right now, you can. Otherwise, you can call me. I can't promise I'll answer immediately -- I have a lot of duties as Captain. But I'll do my best to be responsive."
It's the best she can offer, she thinks. Maybe a bit of an over-offer, even, depending how her conversation with Fikes goes. But... it'd be wrong to offer any less.
<Pose Tracker> Ruri Hoshino has posed.
"A more unified world..." Ruri wonders, considers it, files it into her heart alongside all the other good advice she's gotten.
She nods, looking up to Mitsuba, again. (It's fine. Ruri looks up to just about everyone. Except for her Haro! She's taller than Archimedes.) She'll take care of all of that...
"Thank you," Ruri says, finally, after her offer. "I know you must be very busy, Captain Greyvalley, so I won't be demanding. But... I'm happy you're doing all this." She doesn't smile, or anything like that, but she does look a little relieved.
She pauses, for a moment. "... is it all right," she ventures, a touch more hesitantly, "if I talk about this with Mayvy-san?" It's telling, perhaps, that she asks the woman in charge for permission; that is, after all, the way the adult world works in Ruri's mind. Telling, too, is both the first name -- and the way Ruri claims distance even while using it.
<Pose Tracker> Mitsuba Greyvalley has posed.
From 'Technical Chief Hawkins' to 'Mayvy-san.' Mitsuba decides she's glad she had this talk with Ruri; it's better than the alternative. "Of course you can," she says, with a nod. "Anything I share with you can also be shared with Mayvy. I've known her for a fairly long time -- I trust her implicitly."
She takes a half-step back toward the door. "... try not to let this weigh on you," she offers, gently. "I know that must be hard, but the ship is my responsibility. I'm sure Nergal and Commodore Fikes have a good reason for the way things are the way they are."
Unless Ruri interrupts her, she finally goes. ... and when she does, she really does follow through with just what she said, too. It'd be cruel not to.