2024-06-06: ...honesty isn't for these people, but, for leina's demandS
- Cutscene: ...honesty isn't for these people, but, for leina's demandS
- Cast: Yuliana Kafim
- Where: The Photon Power Labs
- Date: 2024-06-06
- Summary: Leina delivers Yuliana to Dr. Kimura to talk about what she told her. It's more difficult for her to spit it out, with him, but he's prepared -- with a screening tool to give him an overview of how bad it really is. In the end, while Yuliana insists she's going home at some point, she's at least willing to try and work on her boundaries. (Content warning: domestic abuse)
Dr. Kimura wasn't expecting to see Yuliana again, today -- but if Leina's brought her in, that tells him something. Once the door is closed, and Yuliana's sat down on the couch, he leans over -- and offers her a box of tissues.
Because she is, in fact, a mess. Her CEREAL KILLER t-shirt is damp with tears, just like the rest of her face, eyes reddened and nose sniffly. She takes the whole damn box, and grabs some tissues to bury her face in.
"Take your time," he encourages her.
"S--sure," Yuliana mutters. Her breath hitches, as her tentacles coil around herself, a hug she can provide herself without needing a single other soul. What follows is four minutes of silence -- punctuated by strangled noises, hiccoughs, and nose-blowing.
She starts, "Leh--", and chokes on it.
"L-Leina," a second time, "Leina said..." Such awful things! She pulls her feet up onto the couch, with no regard for putting her boots on the cushion, wrapping her arms around her shins and burying her face in against her knees. "Leina said," she tries again, "she said m-my wife was -- I gave her the impression -- I don't know how she got so dramatic about it, but -- she said, she said Elisa was..." And with a miserable little noise, she just curls up in that little ball she's made of herself, layers of compression. "T-the words she said was, 'domestic abuse'. That's what she said. I said I'd tell you what she said. I said it, so -- s-so can I go?"
"You can go if you want to," Dr. Kimura affirms, gently. "I'm glad that you were willing to tell me, Yuliana. But if it's okay, I would like to know why Leina wanted you to tell me what she said."
"I..." The Yuliana ball shifts, as she swallows. "She asked why -- whether the me she fell in love with was -- the me connected to the Void. I didn't... I couldn't answer that. So I thought -- I thought I should ask Elisa, but -- but I-I was so stupid, I, I asked Leina not to tell her, like, like I'd keep it from her? L-like I could lie t-to -- my wife. But Leina -- Leina said -- she said she wanted me to talk to, to you, first."
"It sounds like Leina is worried about you," Dr. Kimura says. "I'm worried too, Yuliana. It sounds like you're worried you'll have to discuss that conversation with Elisa... and you're worried she'll react poorly. Is that right?"
"Mm," Yuliana nods. "I-- I tell her everything, Doctor. Everything. But -- but she won't like this. She won't like that I listened to it. I should know better..."
"There are some questions I'd like to ask you," Dr. Kimura says, pulling out a clipboard, "and they're questions we ask everyone in concerning situations like these, so none of this is a personal comment on you. If you can answer, it will just help me get a better picture of what's going on with you. All right?"
"Mmn," Yuliana nods, still quite buried in the ball she's made of herself.
"Has she ever hit, slapped, strangled, placed her hands around your neck, or otherwise hurt you?" He starts.
"No!" Yuliana barks, clutching herself tighter. "She would never do that. Never -- not ever. I can't even imagine it."
Dr. Kimura nods. "Has she ever hurt, or threatened to hurt, your children, your parents, or your pets?"
"No -- no, she's always been very good with the children," Yuliana insists, shaking her head. "You remember? She even got Maksim a pet snake, just recently, just as he wanted. And -- and my mother, you know -- I think she's one of the only people who can give my Elisa advice, other than me. My wife wouldn't hurt them. And she loves Sokrova! She'd never hurt our special boy!"
He moves to the next item. "Has she ever threatened to hurt or kill you, damaged your possessions, or otherwise made you feel physically unsafe?"
"She wouldn't even threaten something like that!" Yuliana says, voice hot. "It's other people she kills, not me! I -- she can make a mess of things if she's angry, but -- but it's normal to wreck things when you're upset! She wasn't doing it to scare me, it -- it was because she was scared for me!"
"I see," Dr. Kimura frowns, making a mental note to circle back to that one, before he ticks off a few items and moves down the list. "Has she ever coerced or forced you to do sexual things you didn't want to do?"
"Don't be ridiculous," Yuliana's scowl is audible. "I-- if you must know, I'm usually the instigator in the bedroom. And she's never done anything I wasn't very happy about. But if you don't mind, that's our business."
"They're generic screening questions," Dr. Kimura assures her. "Not everything will be relevant to you. I'm glad to hear that part of your life is going well. Does she control or monitor your finances?"
"N-- well--" Yuliana had been just about to deny it out of hand, before the question actually caught up to her. "I... you must understand, I haven't had a job since the Republic betrayed me, so... so of course it's all been on her card. She -- I guess she can see what I buy, but -- she's never criticised me for spending too much, or anything. All it does is -- make it hard to surprise her with gifts, that's all."
Another mark. "Has she ever stalked you, tracked you, or demanded you report your movements?"
The Yuliana-ball shifts, as she pulls one of her hands in, closer to her body. Behind her knees, her eyes look to her purple bracelet. "I... think I might be wearing a tracking chip," she says, "though -- though that might have been another universe. I don't know... I never asked her. She, um... she used to want me to message her regularly so she knew I was okay, but... but when I told her it bothered me, she changed. She cares a lot, you know? About, meeting her obligations as a wife. Doing well by me. I-- I still talk to her a lot, about what I'm doing, but -- but she doesn't insist. It's just, it's what I want to do."
Dr. Kimura frowns. "Does she express displeasure in such a way that you often feel you should alter your behaviour afterwards? Does she make you feel confused, lost, or crazy? Do you often find conversations going her way, even if you have concerns? Is she controlling?"
"Mm..." Yuliana chokes down a reply, but does at least manage to nod, against her knees.
"Does she prefer to keep you isolated from others?" He goes on.
"She knows how important my independence is to me," Yuliana says, though she sounds dismal. "But... but I think it would be less trouble, for her... if I just stayed home."
He marks it down. "Have these behaviours been escalating recently?"
"No-- I mean, she -- she is a little dissatisfied I've been gone so long," Yuliana admits. "But it's not... she hasn't done anything. It's nothing much more. She just misses me. She's just worried."
Another mark. "Are there any plans for separation?"
"NO!" Yuliana belts out, finally emerging from her self-made ball to plant one fist on the couch, gesturing fiercely to him with the other, glaring daggers. "Don't even say that! I won't! I won't, I won't, I won't!"
He remains calm in the face of her panic, shaking his head. "I'm not telling you to do anything," he says. "We just know that in cases of separation or plans to separate, violence can sometimes get worse."
"Then why would anyone ever leave?!" Yuliana asks, snappishly.
"Because violence can escalate inside a relationship, too," Dr. Kimura points out, gently. "Yuliana... are you frightened of your wife? Do you think you're at risk?"
"Only by being here," Yuliana grumbles, all too honest, legs tucking together as they fold on the couch, her arms wrapping about her midsection. "I... I'm not scared of her. I'm just... scared of hurting her. I hate seeing her upset... I thought that was just a decent thing to do," she adds, petulant.
"I see," he frowns. "Do you feel safe to go home, when you leave here?"
"There's nowhere safer for me than the Silent Castle," Yuliana says. "Ch-- and what do you expect to do, even if I said no? There's no refuge in existence which could take me. Even -- even with you people -- if my Elisa decides this is a bad idea, there's no way..." She sighs, looking away. "Except if I told her so, I guess. In -- in Goragon -- that's what happened. I accused her of -- of messing with my head, since -- in that reality, she was doing it. In the other reality." She hasn't convinced anyone in the room. "And that other Elisa, she... she just accepted how they'd turned me around. She didn't deny my wishes. She -- she just left, and said she'd be there when I figured out what I wanted. That wasn't her, and it wasn't me, but... but maybe it would be like that. She's not an unreasonable woman. She -- she wants me to have what I want. Even if it hurt her, she'd probably let me."
"All right," Dr. Kimura nods, as he puts his clipboard to one side. "I understand that you're safe at home, Yuliana, but from your answers -- I have serious concerns about your safety. I'd also like to ask you about something you said earlier, if that's all right."
"Whatever," Yuliana grumbles.
"You said that it's other people she kills," he says, "and I don't think you mean her... usual business. Has she killed people close to you, Yuliana?" This isn't a generic screening question; being fair, there's no screening tool in existence for evaluating a horror witch.
"... yeah," Yuliana says, hands clutching at her elbows. "When -- when I got deployed on that suicide mission to Torrington -- she killed the Lieutenant Colonel who put down the order. I yelled at her... even though she was just trying to keep me safe. And... when she came to save me from Doctor Devi... she killed everyone then, too. Everyone except Alma, I mean. I think she also killed some of the doctors in the Institute before then, too... I mean, after she infiltrated them, I never saw Doctor Kumar again. Or Doctor Sharma, either. Then there was Doctor Petrov..."
"What happened to Doctor Petrov?" Dr. Kimura prompts her, after a moment's silence.
"She didn't die," Yuliana says. "My Elisa just -- hollowed her out for me. Made her my caretaker, in there. She made sure I was... cared for." She frowns, darkly. "I used to get along okay with her, but... but by the end... I really hated her."
"It must be a lot of pressure on you," Dr. Kimura says, sympathetically, in her own language. "Since if someone hurts you, you can't be sure if you're free to get even on your own terms. If your wife decides she has to step in -- they might be killed, or worse. Is that how it feels?"
"I... I guess," Yuliana sighs. "She just cares about me... and it's not as if I didn't want all Doctor Devi's lackeys dead. Or as if I cared about the other Doctors before that. And -- and I shouldn't have even cared about the Lieutenant Colonel -- I just had misplaced loyalty."
"They did all wrong you," Dr. Kimura agrees. "But I wonder if you consider, in the back of your mind, what might happen to your friends if something goes wrong."
"..." Yuliana heaves a great sigh, as she supposes, "... I can't discount it." Her wife... only cares about her, after all, and perhaps their family too.
"You've previously said that your nephews' mother died of a heart condition," Dr. Kimura says. "Are you certain that Elisa didn't have her killed, so that you would be able to adopt the children?"
"What?! No! I mean, I -- I am certain of that," Yuliana shakes her head, scowling. "I asked her directly, and she told me she didn't do anything to Lyubov. I know how it looks, but that -- that was natural causes, Doctor."
"I'm glad to hear that," Dr. Kimura says. "Even so... it must be frightening to have a wife who'll go so far. If you want space, know that we will shelter you."
"I don't!" Yuliana snaps. "I don't, I -- I just want to talk to my wife. I just -- said I'd talk to you first."
"Then... let's work on your boundaries," Dr. Kimura proposes. "With stronger boundaries, you'll be able to navigate your relationship more healthily. Is that all right?"
"I... I guess that's... not so different to what we were doing before," Yuliana sighs. "I guess -- that's fine. That's fine."
She'll quickly learn that her capacity to say no is hardly universal.