2024-03-02: Unfamiliar Tune
- Log: 2024-03-02- Unfamiliar Tune
- Cast: Akane Shinjo, Kaworu Nagisa
- Where: Nouvelle Tokyo - Nouvelle Tokyo Institute of Technology Campus
- OOC - IC Date: 0098-09-03
- Summary: Kaworu and Akane talk for the first time in a while that wasn't predicated on work. They reflect a little on how much things have changed.
<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.
Autumn's arrival has seen a return to school for Akane Shinjo; the back half of the school year has begun, and things have gotten a touch more busy. Recovery is nearly complete -- there's just a few preflight checks she needs at this point to get back to full activity...
... which means she's getting out of the house a lot more! She's made time to go hang out with a friend today.
Showing them around campus seemed like a pretty easy choice -- and there's a lot of nice views to take in, too. Plopping down on a bench in the campus's central courtyard, Akane looks out toward it, waiting for her friend.
As always when she comes to hang out on campus, she's got her sketchpad; while she's still very confident in her artistic skills, campus gives her a lot of opportunities to work on things she's not as confident in. Backgrounds, nature shots -- she's not nearly as confident in these as she is in figures, so the practice is nice.
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
Autumn's arrival hasn't meant the same for Kaworu Nagisa, for he graduated high school early last spring and opted not to move on to higher education. School was always a social diversion for him, and with Shinji having dropped out, there's no more reason to play at it. (He still wears the Tokyo-3 Municipal uniform, such as it is. Kaworu has not grown significantly since he started attending middle school with Shinji, the high school uniform is exactly the same, and this is a uniform that just looks like a regular outfit.)
However, that doesn't mean he disdains the atmosphere of school, and so when Akane invited him to check out *hers*, he was happy to accept. When he strolls over through the campus courtyard towards where Akane awais with her sketchpad, he's humming, as is usual; what's unusual is that it isn't a classical piece. Rather, it's a piece that he's been working on and off on, ever since Sheryl Nome's songwriters competition was announced. He's since submitted it under his pen name that he uses for composing for Ranka... though he hasn't yet gotten a response, beyond a confirmation that it was received.
But that's fine. Kaworu is patient. Either way, it's that song he hums, which Akane will hear louder and louder until at last he stops before her.
He is, in fact, wearing his old school uniform: white button-up shirt, lavender undershirt, belted black pants, popped cream sneakers. It's just so quintissentially Kaworu.
"Hey, Akane," he greets her with his usual easygoing smile. "It's been some time." Not since they helped run support for Shozo's rescue--but that's a separate matter. "I'm glad to see you've been well."
<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.
There's something comforting about Kaworu's familiar choice of look; it's always nice to see him no matter how he looks, but there's definitely a little comfort in the familiar as things change. The humming is nice, too -- but did Kaworu always have such a catchy choice in tunes...?
... maybe he's changing too, and that's a good thing.
(She hears him before she sees him, though.)
"Kaworu! Yeah, it's really been a while, huh..." She smiles at him, pushing her dark hair back a bit. "Wanna sit down?" She scoots over a little on the bench for good measure. "Sorry we didn't meet up sooner... I was pretty wiped for a while there." Laughing a little and rubbing at the back of her head, she explains, "That whole thing was a little harder than I thought it was going to be... kinda different overall, too."
Looking a little embarrassed, she admits, "I didn't expect to be nearly that hungry and tired all the time..." She looks pretty healthy, though she's clearly gained a little weight over her convalescence.
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
Akane scoots over, and Kaworu accepts her invitation by sitting next to her. The melody he hums--or was humming before he spoke up, anyway--is gentle, even wistful, which is not unlike many other songs he's composed or has been composing... so if he is changing, he's at least changing around a central core of who he is.
That's not a bad thing, either.
"No need to apologize," he reassures her. "We've both had a lot to do." Not attending school anymore means that Kaworu is basically an administrator full-time now. While there haven't been any kaiju attacks in a while, Angels can come at any time, which means there's always a certain level of alert at NERV Headquarters.
But that's not really what Akane means; she's had to physically recover from a certain procedure. Kaworu gazes out at the grounds, then over at her. "You look well, at least. Are you saying you haven't been?" he wonders with a bit of concern.
<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.
Akane smiles, getting re-situated in her new position a little more. "Ehe, thanks for being chill about it," she answers, stretching out a little. "The split between the OCU and NUNE made a bunch of work... 3G took on a lot of the smaller civil defense groups in Japan so I haven't had to do a ton of it myself, but I bet it's pretty crazy over there too."
The personal side of things is easier to talk about without exposing both of them to the risk of disclosing something that they now can't disclose to each other, though, so she decides to go with that. "I had kind of a rocky July," she admits, with a little shake of her head. "The in-the-hospital stuff was worse than anything else, though?" She pauses, thinking about things for a few seconds; eventually, she says, "It's more that it wasn't what I expected, ahahah... but I guess that's kinda the point."
Leaning back on the bench, she pivots topics a bit again. "Everyone was really supportive, though. You wouldn't believe the amount of food people brought over, ahaha..."
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
If Kaworu is anything less than chill, things are very wrong! But Kaworu doesn't say that; he only smiles back, eyes shutting with a faint laugh in his throat. He's aware of the OCU-NUNE split too, of course, and when Akane muses on how much more work it's making for NERV on top of GGG, he simply nods, a touch ruefully. The matter of Shozo has meant that there's still some crosstalk between NERV and GGG, since they were still one organization when he was rescued, but it won't be much longer where each of them won't be able to visit the other's headquarters so easily. Information, as Akane has silently acknowledged, is already a sensitive matter.
"I see. I imagine it would be difficult to know what to expect," he replies. Certainly he has trouble wrapping his head around it, but then, gender means next to nothing to Kaworu. "It's good that you've had so much support, though. Not that I expect anything less for you. You are well loved, Akane."
He says that very matter-of-fact, like it's simply a universal truth.
"How has Tsutsujidai been? Do you know? I haven't had the opportunity to be by in a while," he adds. He expects that the Neon Genesis Junior High Students are continuing to keep it safe as they promised, but it's not the same as seeing it for oneself.
<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.
"Ahaha, yeah... I did a normal amount of research, but..." She wobbles a hand. "It's... I think I want to see how far I can go as just another person now, I guess?" It sounds stupid when she says it, but it's important to her to say it.
Tsutsujidai... that gets Akane to smile a little distantly. "I haven't been in a while either, actually... I've heard things are pretty good. I know they're starting to develop, like, the rest of the PLANT? So I get the feeling next time we head up there things are going to be pretty different."
She looks thoughtful for several seconds, thinking about how much things are changing. "... I know it's not really mine anymore, but I do still kinda worry about it. I hope things go well for everyone up there." Her gaze turns skyward, and she adds, "I think it's going to be okay, though." Who knows, maybe that kind of development will be good; certainly it'd be easier for her to justify moving to be closer to Rikka's mom, and feel less weird, living in a newly-developed part of the city that she didn't create...
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
It doesn't sound stupid to Kaworu, at least. But then, his sensibilities aren't the same as a 'normal' person's. He simply nods and accepts her answer for what it is.
"I see. I heard a little about that too, though I didn't know the details." He leans back and gazes up at a certain spot in the heavens, mirroring Akane. "I agree," he says of it being fine. "The Repli-Compoids have strong hearts." Rikka and Utsumi alone would be proof of that. "Should Gridman return one day... I know his heart will be warmed to see it."
For now, though, Kaworu won't be going by to visit. There isn't a reason to, really. Aside from the Neon Genesis Junior High Students, those of Tsutsujidai with whom he'd created the closest bonds have all left, and even if there were... they'll be all right without him.
Barring the arrival of another Hyper Devil, but what are the odds of that, really?
"What destination to you have your sights set on for now?" he wonders, looking back at Akane.
<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.
Strong hearts, huh... it's nice to hear someone else say it. She really does care for them -- even if they're not 'hers' anymore. "I kinda miss Gridman. I feel like... I wanted to do more for him before he left," Akane murmurs. "I know he's got other people to save, though."
A destination... in some senses, Akane hadn't thought about that. "I guess finishing college? I came in with an okay number of test credits, and I might end up with a few more from work stuff, but that's still gonna be a while. 3G Intelligence training is important, too, but some of the stuff I want to do is too niche for me to get trained in on internally." It's been a long time since she walked this one out out loud to someone... it's kind of grounding, in a way.
"I guess I want to help other lonely people," she answers, ultimately. "It's kind of a vague destination, but that's kinda better, right?" A pause. "What about you?"
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
"Yes..." Kaworu's expression turns wistful. "We agreed to end our romance shortly before he left. If fate is to reassert itself--" in their case, Gridman's fate to save those who need saving, "--the fun we shared needed to come to an end. But it was fun, while it lasted."
And it was different from the times he's shared with Shinji. Not in a good way or a bad way--it was simply different. Whether Gridman remembers the next time around or not, and he very well may, Kaworu will treasure the memories they shared.
But for now, it's time to talk of the future. He nods as Akane explains her goals, which are ultimately in the service of helping other lonely people. Kaworu nods. "It's broad, because the world and the hearts of humankind are broad. It's noble to broaden yourself like that too, Akane. But do take care to mind your limits, even as you expand them."
What about him, though? That ruefulness returns to Kaworu's smile, reflected mostly in the droop of his eyelashes. "I'll continue to do my duty. The Angels have not yet been eradicated, and so they continue to threaten the world of Lilim. After that..." He meets Akane's eyes. "It will be for Lilim to decide."
<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.
Nodding to Kaworu, Akane says, "That's... yeah, I can get that." She feels a little bad for a moment -- for Kaworu? For Gridman? ... Maybe she feels guilty for still having something when Kaworu doesn't? It's hard to say -- but she doesn't make it about her. "I'm glad you two had fun."
Mention of minding her limits gets Akane to nod a bit. "... Yeah. I worry about that kinda stuff... I know what it's like to reach a little too big and get obsessed over it, so like -- ehehe... well, I don't really wanna do that again." That reminds her of something else she's been a little worried about -- but she doesn't want to bring it up to Kaworu yet.
Absently tapping her pencil against her sketchpad instead, Akane loops back to Kaworu's side of things. "... well, I know the kinda choices I'd want to make there," Akane murmurs, at that. It's an uncomfortable, heavy topic -- navigating it proves difficult. After a moment or two, she adds, "... Either way, I'm glad I got the chance to get to know you."
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
"Thank you," Kaworu replies graciously. "It was an enlightening experience, and I'm glad I gave him the chance to share it with me."
Whether he'd repeat it or not is another matter, but it's a non-issue. He doesn't think they'll be able to go back to what they had again anyway. Shinji has always been first in his heart, and right now, he needs him.
"Yes," he agrees as Akane acknowledges the ways she's overstepped her limitations in the past. He has faith that she'll do fine now, but it doesn't hurt to give her a reminder every so often--not just to take care of herself, but that she has friends who care for her.
He glances down at her sketchpad when she taps her pencil on it, though whether he can see what she's drawn depends on if she's willing to let him see. His own future is indeed a heavy topic, something he knows well, so he doesn't mind her discomfort. When she settles on her answer, he smiles at her softly.
"I'm glad I got to know you, too," he replies. "I've had so many chances to know so many people I might never have known before..." That's the nature of an intersected world, after all, something Kaworu knows well. Even knowing Akane has an idea of the shape of the world, though, he doesn't say that explicitly. Instead, he concludes, "No matter what becomes of me, I consider it a blessing."
<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.
Akane doesn't hide her art from Kaworu, at least; it's architectural art -- she's trying to capture the performing arts building. She's taken a few different cracks at it; all of them are reasonable likenesses, but they're all a little different, too.
When she notices him looking, Akane scoots the sketchpad a few inches closer to him. "I don't mind if you take a look," she says. "I've been trying to draw better buildings... that kinda perspective stuff is a little tricky for me? You'd think it'd be easier with the 3D art background but it's actually kinda harder, like -- with a sculpture or a diorama I can manipulate that stuff in my hands and know why it's looking wrong, but..."
She trails off. "Anyway... it's nice, yeah. Not everyone gets to take a lot of cracks at it, either... it's good you can look at it that way."
Her expression turns serious. "But don't be afraid to be a little selfish, too, okay?" ... She can't quite bring herself to say the words, but she wouldn't want Kaworu to be so selfless, so insistent on seeing anything at all as a blessing, that she lost him.
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
Akane tilts her sketchpad towards him, and Kaworu thus gets a better look at her sketches. They are indeed all a little different--none of them a perfect replication. In that imperfection, there is beauty, but it's not the beauty that Akane's striving for, it sounds like. It sounds like she's trying to cross a gap from three-dimensional to two-dimensional art.
"It does look like you're having trouble with it," he remarks. "But you've made fine progress as well." He leans back to smile up at her. "Lilim culture is all wonderful to me, but I'm far more familiar with the aural rather than the visual arts."
She comments on his many chances on her own. Yet... He chuckles a bit, but there is a sadness in the dip of his eyelashes, in the bow of his head. "Shinji-kun's said something like that to me too. Actually, he begged me to be more selfish, once."
...It sounds like Shinji and Akane were thinking the same thing.
<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.
"I really need to get back to piano... maybe I should take my keyboard back out of storage?" Akane muses, as Kaworu mentions aural rather than visual art. "A bunch of my stuff is in a storage locker right now. I wasn't sure what the space situation would actually be like in the apartment, so I wanted to take it slow, but I think we have somewhere I could store it..."
She probably wouldn't have thought of that -- at least not this week -- if Kaworu hadn't mentioned it.
When Kaworu mentions that Shinji said the same thing, Akane smiles. "Sounds like you've already got a pretty smart friend in your corner, huh. Good... you deserve that." She eventually returns her sketchpad back to its neutral position, and for a few seconds, just sits there and thinks.
... Maybe what Kaworu needs is some more inducement to be selfish. She adds, "I know you're not much for food, but I kinda want to make sure you have a good time out here... hrrmmm..." A smile crosses her face. "Wanna check out the performing arts center in a bit? There's basically always music going on in there."
<Pose Tracker> Kaworu Nagisa has posed.
"If you do, I'd be pleased to give you piano lessons like we discussed before," Kaworu offers. "It's been some time." Even if it still takes some time for Akane to get her keyboard out of storage, and even if it ends up being a while before they can meet up again after that, Kaworu remains infinitely patient.
His smile broadens and warms when Akane praises Shinji. Whether he's someone Kaworu deserves or not, words can't express how happy Kaworu always is to be close to him. That's harder these days after he left NERV and Tokyo-3, but still, he can go to the Ra Mari II anytime he likes to visit him. Which is often. For Kaworu, that's plenty selfish.
But that's also selfishness on a different level of being human. When Akane offers to show him the performing arts center, he returns her smile. "That sounds lovely. I'd be delighted to."
...Even if 'delight' isn't quite the word for his typically mellow tone and expression, but it's the thought that counts.
<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.
It'll give Akane some time to brush up on the basics again, though. If she's going to get lessons from a much better player, she wants to have her feet under her. "Yeah -- for me too. I really want to play again, but I don't think I'm at the level of the clubs here or anything..."
Akane stands up, with a little more effort than she used to; it's clear that she's a little shaky on her feet -- possibly from having spent so much time off them the last few months. "I'm fine," she says, almost on reflex; indeed, once she takes a second to stabilize herself, she does seem like she's okay and the distress she'd experienced was pretty transient.
"C'mon," she says, gesturing with her sketchpad for Kaworu to follow her. "I don't go into that building super often so I don't know if there's gonna be much other than some scattered practice groups, but we may as well take a peek, right?" She gives him a smile, starting to move forward.