2024-02-22: Sheryl Nome Song Contest - 'Auto-Mata'
- Log: 2024-02-22: Sheryl Nome Song Contest - 'Auto-Mata'
- Cast: Asciel Colette
- Where: Undisclosed Location
- Date: U.C. 0098 02 22
- Summary: Asciel Colette's submission to Sheryl Nome's song concert - a song about bitter futures, tangled love, and the desire of errors. (Owing to controlled acceleration, this takes place August 0098.)
--<sender: @atry+1_(priv)>
--<recipient: @Sheryl_Nome>
--<subject: Song Contest Submission - "Auto-Mata">
The video message attached shifts unfocused at first, before a flash of cyan crossing the camera foretells a figure running towards a makeshift little stage.
The locale? It could be countless cities, their communication spires peeking over the edge of the railing of this rooftop. Gentle blue illumination has been converted into four spotlights aimed at the star at its center.
"Haaaah. I'm excited.~"
An arm extended to her side, the one and only Asciel Colette sharpens into frame. For much of 0098, she's been completely missing - given the seclusiveness of this message, it seems she's still quite evasive of the authorities.
"Hiii there, Sheryl Nome! And I know this one's going to ~reach you, because my star as a songwriter has burned all the hotter over the past few months. I'm Asciel Colette, the Virtual Sage, Earth's idol of eschatology and supreme muse! While your voice weaves webs of ~harmony across the cosmos, I sing for the sake of Earth's eternal twilight. Or rather, I did, before a few incidents got in my path. The rumors may be plentiful that I've fallen, or retired, or vanished outright, but I [promised] to never, ever give up. I'm planning to make my return to the stage soon enough - and I aspire for it to be one even you would envy!"
All the scenery-chewing energizes Asciel's words and animates her movements - she's clad in a tight black jumpsuit with angular lines of LED-lined color, leaving her shoulders and the sides of her legs bare. The stage lights maneuver and change orientation subtly as she progresses. Even after losing so much, the skills to run her own AV equipment seem to have stayed intact.
"But before I do, I heard of this ongoing contest of yours. And I just knew I had to make my stand, to ~rise triumphantly over the many who aspire to hear their words in your voice!"
"This is the first song I wrote since I was ~remade. This is the first song I wrote, when I began to realize my heart really was entwined with others."
The lights cut off.
A plucky electronic tune welcomes the listener.
( May'n - Auto-Mata : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2sWaGt51O0 )
Sync, plug, incise
Sekai wa "ashi" wo erabu - 2045
(The world will choose evil in 2045)
Stop, play, analyze
Gosa no nai jibun iyaki ga sasu hodo
(I'm so without error it makes me sick)
A gently industrial beat brings the song to the familiar undertones of cyberpunk aesthetics - and there's a familiarity to Asciel's motions on 'stage'. Practiced, organized, meticulous, and.../familiar/. Steps and swings evocative of 3D-rendered dance programs, the kind many likely have seen mirrored over and over in pairing a model of a character to the song associated with them.
Seimei no goudatsu kensou no coda
(The pillaging of life, a tumultuous coda)
Ai no uta ga matowaritsuite hanarenai
(A love song wraps around me and won't let go)
Kore ga kotae nara isso boku wa
(If this is the answer, then I should've)
Ningyou no mama de yokatta
(Just stayed a doll)
But right then and there, the tones back down to a level synth piano, and something profoundly human seems to enter Asciel's motions. Arms coiling around herself with the hint of clinging at being 'wrapped around' - and of course, her limbs mime falling a touch limp at 'staying a doll', only for a fist to clench in defiance at the last note before the chorus swells...
Anata no namida wo kakikaete shimaeta nara
(If only I could have overwritten your tears)
Konna ni kurushimu sekai nante nakatta!
(We would never have had a world where you suffer so much!)
Sabi darake no saibou shiranakereba yokatta no ka?
(Should you have not learned about the cells rife with rust?)
Ayamachi wa yousetsu-suru "kikai" no te no naka dee
(I'll weld my mistakes onto the palms of a miracle)
There's a peculiar little passion storming Asciel's voice, a fire in her eyes at these words as she reaches towards the camera itself. Towards Sheryl? - Of course that's not who she's thinking of. It's her distraught feelings towards a cherished world that spurns her. It's her ache at realizing the immaculate one she loves is lonely without her.
Fingers laid over her own palm - the one that seized countless miracles and countless mistakes alike. They may have been wrong, but they are hers.
And they carry Asciel into the second verse and chorus, a mirror of the first - but which no longer can even pretend to hide the blaze in her voice.
Ai, yue no, impasse
Sekai wa sekai wo ubau 2045
(The world will steal the world in 2045)
steel, kurau, paralyze
Gosa darake no machi mata, hitotsu kieta no?
(Has yet another city rife with error vanished?)
Gensou to bougyaku, meikyuu to code
(Fantasy and tyranny, mazes and code)
Yume demo ii kara, samete kureru na!
(I don't care if I'm dreaming; don't wake me up!)
Kuruisou na kodou shoudou bokura wa
(The irregular heartbeat, impulse, made sure we)
Hitotsu ni wa narenakatta
(Could never be as one)
Breaking from patterns - and lost in desires, the second bridge sees Asciel plant her feet ever stronger. The framing of the little video-concert for one places the full moon in frame, and in Asciel's palm whenever it raises, as though she's serenading the lunar surface.
Anata no kokoro ni furetai to sakende kara
(After I screamed that I want to touch your heart)
Konna ni kotoba mo ishi mo yakete shimatta
(I ended up roasting my words and will pitch black)
Kizu darake no ainou negawanakereba yokatta no ka?
(Should I have not wished for a love-brain rife with wounds?)
Kanashimi ga gyakuryuu-suru kikai no te no naka dee
(I'll counter my sorrow onto the palms of a miracle)
An extended instrumental break clearly is just what Asciel needed- because as much as the idol's there to signal a heart to the stage, there's such a thing as too much, and she crosses that line several times over. Putting every ounce of what eats at her into her performance, eyes shimmering on the verge the tears of passion she can't quite cry.
But there's just as much a satisfied smile on her lips as well, eyes closed and easing up the tension in her dance throughout the break. She's not spinning with enough force to risk falling over or sending a stage-light toppling down.
The lights flicker on and off, capturing Asciel in staccato frames, and each individual one makes a photo album blossoming from over-wrought intensity to self-fulfillment.
Right now, the truth that she was born to perform like this rings truest, and it's a light she's longed to recapture for the better part of a year. Even in this concert just for one, Asciel Colette lives brighter than she has in so achingly long, and right before the final chorus, a strange serenity floods her voice.
She's back home.
Anata no namida wo kakikaete shimaeta nara
(If only I could have overwritten your tears)
Konna ni kurushimu sekai nante nakatta!
(We would never have had a world where you suffer so much!)
Sabi darake no saibou shiranakereba yokatta no ka?
(Should you have not learned about the cells rife with rust?)
Ai no uta ga, shikai wo fusagu
(A love song will block my view)
Anata no namida mo nisemono da to wakatte itemo
(Even if I know your tears are also fake)
Moyasu koto nado dekinai kono saga
(I could never burn away my nature)
"Uso darake no hontou" shirarete hoshiku wa nai ga
(I never wanted to learn about a "truth rife with lies," so)
Gosa darake no uta wo nozonda no wa, naze
(Why did I desire a love song rife with errors?)
As the song dials down to its conclusion, the stage lights dissolve one by one, until only a single lamp beneath Asciel's feet illuminates her alone in the dim late-evening rooftop. She holds her poise until the very last note-
And only once it's utterly over does she allow herself to breathe in recovery she still does not need. It was the first trapping of human-like speech she mastered, and it's one that never has left her. The night air swirls around the idol's frame, and the moment of silence lingers longer than she intended.
The longing look in her eyes persists.
"...To put it all together like that...I'm sure by now it's second nature to you, Sheryl Nome."
"Has it gotten any less ~magical?"
"Have you ever wound up at the end of a performance of something new, and felt ~ennui instead of ~satisfaction?"
"...One day, I'm sure I will get there. I'm sure everyone does. But right now...it's almost unimaginable. Bathing in the spotlight and pouring one's heart to the ~heavens..."
"It's a majesty only idols understand. ...yes. Everything I sung there...there's a world of difference between me and humanity, but the brilliant star of ~becoming an idol may not be so different between us. Either way, it takes a passion few can muster. Few can even understand. To hold onto this ~star is the very reason Asciel Colette ~bloomed into being, and now, it feels like every other purpose is far away."
Is meandering about her own overly dreamy feelings, in what ought to be a formal and professional submission, undue and unwelcome? ...Or is this the only way Asciel could have ever concluded it, this distant way of trying to reach Sheryl Nome's heart?
The back of Asciel's hand flutters past the midsection of her ponytail.
"I'm sure I'll know exactly what your answer is, when this song clutches everyone's hearts in your next album.~"
And with that sensationally over-confident flourish, the video message cuts off.