2023-09-05: Too Late to Say Goodbye

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<Pose Tracker> Shozo has posed.

Shozo pants as he runs his little legs off towards the departure spot. He could probably get there faster, but he got a bit too close to... parts of himself he didn't like in the battle against Alexis. And he's still being a kid because... well, that's what Gridman knows! He could save the unfailing of his older look to his family when Gridman returns. Or maybe he'll show him before he goes! There are so many options, after all. He grins as he pushes himself, clearing streets with single bounds, now. Tsutsujidai isn't THAT big -- he'll make it.

Except, when he touches down, people are walking away. A few are still looking up at a fading light in the sky, and Borr and the others are helping...

Not Gridman.

Shozo had seen this person in Gridman before -- he knew who he was, of course -- but Yuta Hibiki hadn't helped raise him. He wasn't family. A pit in his stomach started to form as he slowly approaches Borr.

"He didn't... He didn't leave yet, did he?" 

<Pose Tracker> Neon Genesis Junior High Students has posed.

The farewell party is beginning to disperse, many of the guests on their way out, with a few choosing to have a last quiet moment together. The otherworldly pink light that heralded Gridman's exit fades before Shozo's eyes.

He's /seconds/ too late.

Max stands near the back of the room, an unconscious Yuta Hibiki in his arms. Despite the identical appearance to Gridman, there's something... different, about the red-headed boy's body, now. It can be felt. Something has left. Calibur stands off to the side with Rikka and Utsumi, while Vit says goodbye to a few guests by the door. Borr, too, is occupied, starting to gather used plates and cups, but they put down the dishes immediately as Shozo makes an appearance.

"Shozo..." Borr looks stricken. It's certainly the most distress Shozo has ever seen the Hyper Agent express. "I'm sorry. You just missed him. That light appeared, and he was just... gone."

Stepping closer, he opens his arms, offering Shozo a hug.

"It's okay. He knows you love him. He won't be gone forever, okay?" Borr's voice wobbles. "Gridman's coming back, as soon as he can." 

<Pose Tracker> Shozo has posed.

Shozo doesn't cry -- some days it's not clear if he really knows how to. He just stares up at the last embers of pink light, eyes wide, stars fading from his eyes into dull disks of red.

"But... I didn't get to... to say goodbye..." he murmurs, legs going wobbly. As Borr comes up to him, the strength just leaves his body, letting him fall into Borr's arms. He's cold to the touch, eyes never leaving that point in the sky.

"I-I was late, but... I thought he cared enough to wait for me," he says numbly, starting to tremble.

Slowly, he lets his eyes drift over to the unconscious Yuta -- and he feels that bloom of *terrible* rage in his chest, arm clenching and trembling as something in him--

And then he pushes himself back, out of Borr's grip, and like flowing water, *grows*. Moments later, he is older again, panting, long hair flowing around him as he kneels on the ground. He lets his hands press into the ground, trying to catch his breath.

"...Sorry," he mumbles, not looking up. "I... I don't think I can grieve properly as a child right now. This is grief, right? I can't imagine what else it would be." 

<Pose Tracker> Neon Genesis Junior High Students has posed.

"Gridman stayed as long as he could." Borr answers, helplessly. "That damn light just took him. I don't think he had a choice."

What is there to say? Reality looms before them, harsh and unchangeable. Borr squeezes Shozo tightly, tears gathering in her eyes. Her mind races, trying to find the right words.

If the right words exist, Borr doesn't find them in time. Shozo pulls away, and... Changes. With fear in their voice, Borr yells out, "Shozo!"

With a blur of movement, they're joined by the rest of the Neon Genesis Junior High Students. Calibur has drawn his sword.

"Borr. What has happened?" Max asks -- Yuta left on a couch at the edge of the room.

"Hey, let's take it easy!" Vit raises his hands in a placating gesture. "This could be anything."

Shoving past their companions, Borr walks up to Shozo, tentatively reaching out to put a hand on the now-teenager's shoulder. "Hey, kid... What's going on? Why did you, uh..." Borr glances across Shozo's altered form. "What's up with the aging?"

Shozo speaks, and Borr looks back at Max, giving the large man a nod. It's still Shozo. Borr would know if it wasn't. Slowly, Calibur sheathes his blade. Vit sighs, running a hand through his hair. Max, slowly, relaxes his stance.

As Shozo stays kneeling, Borr sits next to him. Calibur, Max, and Vit approach, sitting as well, looking at Shozo with concern. Everything is quiet for a moment.

"So. This is new." Vit breaks the silence. "I like the hair, kid. Could you always do this?"

"Mmh." Calibur grunts. "Y--Yes. This is grief. I--it won't be easier in any form. I--I think."

Not like Calibur has any forms to compare with.

"I cannot say I know your thoughts perfectly, Shozo. But we are united in this feeling. You need not face this loss alone." Max rumbles. There's an unsteadiness to his voice, beneath his mask.

Borr smiles at their companions, bringing a hand up to wipe their eyes. "Yeah. These guys are better at this shit than I am. But don't give up on Gridman, Shozo, okay? No way he's gonna stay in that dump any longer than he's gotta." 

<Pose Tracker> Shozo has posed.

Shozo gives Vit a sad, numb smile.

"Yeah, I could always do this. Changes my body, changes my mentality. I've done it a few times now. A kid... doesn't really have the ability to cope with a lot of the stuff I'm dealing with, right? It's not easy to *be* a kid during times like this. So when it's too much, or I have things I need to do... Well, this is me."

Shozo fishes a hair-tie -- one of Borr's -- and pulls his hair into a long ponytail.

"And... to be perfectly honest, it's too much. I... I shouldn't *hate* Yuta Hibiki. None of this is his fault. But he's here, and Gridman isn't, and the two are related. Little me just... couldn't square that circle. I can do it like this, and that's what matters." Shozo stands up -- he's about Vit's height, his clothes having shifted to a more understated outfit, and he just sorta... scoops up Borr into a hug.

"I'm still your kid, and you're still my family. Gridman is still my family too." He lets out a shaky breath, closing his eyes as he squeezes Borr.

"I hope he knows that. I hope he's not upset that I missed him." A redness builds up around his eyes, but still no tears. 

<Pose Tracker> Neon Genesis Junior High Students has posed.

"Cool." Vit says, evenly. Out of everyone, he seems the least upset by Shozo's 'new' ability. "I like it. I'm guessing the change is more than skin deep, huh? Changes your ability to cope..."

"I am concerned," Max begins, "That this solution will resolve in a larger issue later. If your child self is injured, healing must be offered to him. But, perhaps that is an issue for another day."

As Shozo begins to fuss with his hair, Borr steps in. "Here, I've got you."

Taking the hair-tie from Shozo's hands, Borr combs through his hair briefly with their fingers. With practiced fingers, they french braid Shozo's hair from just beneath his crown down to the nape of his neck. Letting the rest of Shozo's hair flow out, Borr fastens the elastic.

"There we go. I'll show ya how it's done if you want, later. We've got time." Borr smiles. "Gotta have my kid looking good."

And then, as Shozo stands, Borr's eyes widen. Vit lets out a low whistle, impressed.

"Damn it, I'm the shortest again?!" Borr laughs shakily. They're trying hard to keep the conversation light. "Woah--!"

Shozo lifts them into a hug, and Borr allows it, wrapping their arms around him in turn. After a second, Vit steps forward -- then Max, then Calibur. Each member of the Neon Genesis Junior High Students embraces Shozo. His appearance doesn't matter -- they're a family. Nothing can take that away.

"It is alright." Max steps back. "My feelings toward Yuta Hibiki are complicated, and... likely will remain so, for quite a while. In some ways, Gridman was." Max clears his throat and tries again. "Was."

The enormous Hyper Agent turns, hiding his face from the others. One hand raises to his eyes.

"It's alright, big guy. We get you." Vit murmurs. "You know, Shozo? I bet Yuta's going to be real conflicted about the rest of us. There's no rush in getting to know him."

Calibur looks toward the couch, at the sleeping redhead. "I--I would like to know him. W--when he's ready."

"Me too." Borr answers. They reach up, cupping Shozo's cheek in their hand. "It's okay, Shozo. We've all shed tears. If you want to cry, it's okay. It's just us here now."

A pause, and they speak up again. "...do you know how? It took some practice to figure this shit out for me, too. For me, crying is like... You feel things too big for your heart. You've gotta get those feelings out, or they'll make you sick. Just let go, and your body does the rest."

"Might help to close your eyes." Vit shrugs. "At first, anyway. It'll sting a bit, but it won't be too bad."

Max's shoulders tremble. "He understands." The large man's voice is wrecked. "Gridman would never hold it against you. All the more reason for you to be here when he returns, Shozo. The last thing he asked was for us to protect this city, and this world, and to care for each other."

Slowly, Max turns back to the group. Tears fill his eyes and fall down the metal grooves of his mask. "I believe in your capability in both regards."

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