2023-05-10: Welcome to Adulthood

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  • Cutscene: Welcome to Adulthood
  • Cast: Arriety Hearn
  • Where: Ra Mari II Hangar
  • Date: 10th May 2023
  • Summary: Arriety has a face to face with the kaiju in her heart.

The Zeta Gundam, 3A Type, stands inert in the hangar of the Ra Mari II. A weathered mix of Gundarium alloy, luna titanium, composite steels and other such materials, just cresting below twenty meters in height. It's seen things, been places, discombobulated and turned half-alive in the throes of a kaiju and back again. There's history behind that metal, the dim eyes half-hidden underneath the gold V-fin.

Inside its open cockpit, cabin lights lit up in the relative dark, Arriety Hearn tiredly detaches, cleans and reattaches cables; the panels in front of her flicker, first in static, then in a pane of test colours, and then input. Lavhi expressed interest in upgrading some of the software to something made this decade; Arriety has no idea what it means to run an operating system 11 years old.

The screen flickers again. The cable's shot. "Crap," Arriety grumbles. "Is that what having old software does?"

Flicker. Then, a bean-shaped figure appears in place of diagnostics, with a long horn and golden cats-eyes.

"What... Myrme?" Arriety blinks a few times.

"Iiiiit's me," chimes the reflection in the mirror. "Don't you remember? I told you I'd be with you. Do you think that'd be the feel-good movie kind, where they never interrupt with their intrusive thoughts, just the warm fuzzy feelings?"

Arriety sags back on her chair, reaching for a half-drunk sippy bottle. "What do you want."

"Nothing! What do *you* want, Ah-ri? Just *look* at you."

"I want to get this maintenance done and--"

"And do what, go back and play videogames and drink mixers? Booze, videogames, violence, booze, videogames, violence. I know weird old politicians used to tell kids videogames made them violent, in the twilight years, but--"

"What's wrong with videogames."

"That's a deflection and you know it, Ah-ri. What's up with *you*, is the question. What're you doing to yourself. What's waiting for you in the close, dark future?"

Arriety rubs at her tired eyes. "I don't *care*. This is enough. All of *this*... is enough. My friends. My loved ones. The Ra Mari II--"

Myrme leans forward, even though she's still a two-dimensional reflection on a mirror. "She effortlessly lies through her teeth, a smile that's become so practiced even amongst close company. But there's nothing in there. She surrounds herself with so much love, so much warmth, but does any of it reach?"

Silence in the cockpit. "Look, Minae and I are working through it in therapy--"

"And where's that gotten you? It's been a few months since you moved in here. You bought your own clothes, you decorated your room like they urged you to. Did that change anything?"

"I cook tasty food that they enjoy. That's not something a depressed person does--"

"You overcompensate by making five dishes and banchan for a potluck just so you can feel Big and Important next to everyone else."

"What's your point?"

Myrme shifts again, cackling to herself. "I'm not making points, Ah-ri. I can't make points. I'm dead, remember? Brought in back to the fold. The only reason I ever surfaced in the first place is because you resented the incoming march of adulthood so much that dark powers that be heard you and responded in kind."

The dark-haired Korean girl rubs at her eyebrows. "The drama club..."

"The drama club's just an excuse. Did those girls really grate you off that much, or are they just convenient corpses for you to point a finger at? Wanna do it with Captain Balliwick too?"

"I don't like this," she darkly murmurs.

"I'm revelling in this, Ah-ri," Myrme shifts. "You hated the dark and violent world of adulthood so much that you made manifest the monster in your heart. But now that I'm done and dusted, death by beam rifle, you know where you've ended up? You haven't grown up. Your heart hasn't expanded. Your psyche is in shit shambles, if I can be blunt for a second."

Arriety adjusts herself in her seat.

"Do you know what *this* is, Ah-ri? All of this, all of you?"

Her red eyes lift up, but doesn't respond.

"This is you waking up to the beat of that shitty alarm ringtone from that stealth game you liked. This is a quick shower, a half-forgotten protein bar, a Normal suit, and six hours of combat patrol. Six hours of telling the XO that you're really glad you haven't seen any enemy signals, while inside you burn up and wish that someone would go the wrong way so you could turn them into space dust."

Arriety's eyes narrow. "Minae and I have talked about the combat thing--"

"The only thing you think of when you're off-duty is how if you could get horny, you'd be a real person, while pretending you've made peace with that socially. Then you go off into combat, the only place you can really get horny, because you love the little way the six warning alarms go off in succession when the Waverider hydraulic pump's ruptured, the way the shock absorbers fail a *little* and all the blood rushes to your head..."

She's silent. Go on.

"Then you go back and it's grape soju cut with Island Cola, and four hours of pressing O to roll through weird armor guys with axes and messed up dragons until you pass out, and then repeat, and repeat, and repeat. It's everything you ever expected. It's exactly as dreary and boring as you feared, now that you don't have a bean-shaped kaiju to run around pretending like you're a kid with a mascot. You know what this all is, Ah-ri?"

Arriety is expectant. Myrme's grin is toothy as she says:

"Welcome to your adulthood, Ah-ri. Congratulations."