2023-01-01: "If We Share Those Burdens"
- Log: "If We Share Those Burdens"
- Cast: Gridman, Ennil El
- Where: Inoue Hospital, Tsutsujidai
- OOC - IC Date: 01-01-0097
- Summary: Gridman continues his path to recovery. Ennil El is there to support him, but has to be supported in turn. Burdens shared are burdens halved.
<Pose Tracker> Gridman has posed.
Outside Inoue Hospital, a handsome man blurs into vision, carrying a beautiful young lady in his arms. He lets her down gently, helping smooth down her hair from the rush of wind. "Tell the boss I said hello, babe!"
With a kiss, Vit rushes off again. Today, he's filling in for Calibur with the Shuffle Alliance so the lanky samurai can get some rest.
As usual, the hospital is a crowded, frantic place, but the further Ennil goes toward her destination, the less chaotic things become. The physical therapy wing is fairly empty. All hands were needed to tend to the injured from the battle, still, so most patients in need of physical therapy were sent home.
Max had managed to get a comprehensive plan for Gridman's physical therapy. While he won't have a doctor's supervision, he at least has approval to begin working! And so, Ennil arrives in a room smelling strongly of chlorine. It's a fairly small pool, not meant for play, but it's clean and bright.
Sitting along the side of one of the walls is Gridman himself, wearing a light t-shirt over his swim trunks. He's stretching his arms, carefully, preparing for the therapy to come. Yellow eyes glance toward Ennil as she approaches, and though he doesn't smile, there's a sense of warmth in his oddly metallic voice.
"Ennil. Thank you so much for coming. I wouldn't be able to get my session in today without you." Gridman wheels toward her -- again, a slow, cautious movement, but one that shows genuine progress. "Before we begin, please, tell me how you have been. It's a terrible time to have come to Tsutsujidai."
<Pose Tracker> Ennil El has posed.
Ennil, herself, doesn't perfectly resemble what Gridman would be used to. Her loose, choppy hair is tucked into a ponytail - she's filling out an NGJHS suit quite nicely - and of course, she's much more in the habit of smiling, these days. Though they've seen each other in passing plenty, getting Max to step away from the boy's care...
Honestly, it hadn't really been worth trying. It means a lot that he's arranged for her to be here today. "Of course. I'm here to support you." It's odd to see him like this, but not totally unpleasant. She's seen this same boy smile through vulnerability before... now, it's more like he's trying to be strong. He asks her to talk about her, though, and though her blue eyes go a bit owlish, she nods and smiles.
"I can't say it hasn't been tough. Tsutsujidai is in bad shape. And I was pretty anxious when I first got the news." She gently scuffs a toe against the tile. "But the city is healing. And not the way the kaiju used to do it. People are doing it themselves. I think that means something..."
She looks up, then back down at Gridman. "Not exactly what you asked though, huh? I'm... doing well. I can't tell how things are going to go - I'm worried about Akane - but. Being welcomed into the NGJHS... and, well, I had a lovely New Year's with Vit! So I'm doing pretty well!"
<Pose Tracker> Gridman has posed.
A quick, barely-there smile crosses Gridman's face for a moment. "Thank you. To know you supported my comrades all this time... It's more than I could have ever asked for. I would trust no one else to have taken this place."
"And it seems the look agrees with you." He says, regarding the suit, with a nod. "To see the civilians waking up at last has been rewarding. I never expected it, even before I was like this. Your instincts are right, it's a true sign of hope."
"You and Vit seem to have become close." Gridman says, a hint of amusement in his voice. He tilts his head slightly to the side, letting his red hair shift and fall. "Again, this is something I never expected. Especially from Vit." It's an opening -- if Ennil wishes to discuss it more, she can. But it's clear Gridman won't press.
Yellow eyes turn back to the pool. There's a ramp leading into the water. "I should begin. Would you assist me in transferring? I would like to attempt to walk in under my own power, but I need help to be able to stand up." Gridman slides the brakes into their activated position.
A hand is reached out to Ennil.
<Pose Tracker> Ennil El has posed.
Ennil catches that little bit of amusement, and almost blushes, but - well. She's with a friend. "You know, it surprised me too. He asked me out the day we finished with Junk -- the day you woke up, actually." She pauses a moment in thought, watching Gridman move. "It'll make a nice anniversary."
It's a chance to give her friend something to smile about. So while she interrupts the story for a moment to reach out for that hand and help Gridman to his feet, she has every intention of sharing. She has to kneel slightly at first - both because of the wheelchair, and because she's so much taller than him - but once he's standing, she just keeps her forearm steady. If he needs to lean into her any more on the way into the pool, he's welcome to, of course.
"He's new to this. Obviously. It sounds like he mostly learned to talk to people online. He can be a little silly, sometimes." Her other hand goes up to her hair, lightly teasing a few strands back into that ponytail. It's still not very well behaved. "But he's really sincere once you get past all that. And he pays attention to what makes me happy. It's easier to get through difficult things with someone you trust."
<Pose Tracker> Gridman has posed.
"My 'birthday'." Gridman murmurs, looking thoughtful. "Or so Renais put it. Is it proper for one to claim two birthdays? I suppose I hardly know when my birthday as myself is." A quick shake of his head. "But in any case, we will have something to celebrate. I'm thankful for that, especially in times like these."
With a bracing breath, Gridman stands, holding tightly to Ennil's hand. Despite his period of inactivity, his grip is still strong. "Thank you -- just one moment, let me adjust, please." Stars swim in front of his vision, and he wobbles slightly. It's painful, but it eases slowly, until he stands confidently. "Thank you, Ennil."
Thankfully, Ennil and Gridman are right by the entrance to the pool, and he wades in slowly, one hand on a purposefully-placed guide rail. As he enters the water, his shirt floats up, revealing a truly terrible scar on the left side of his stomach. It's healing well, surely thanks to Eisen's care, but... It's going to stay with him for life.
"I will be listening, but beginning my exercises at the same time. Please do not worry, you have my attention." Once he's in the water to halfway up his chest, he turns back to Ennil. He seems to be able to move much more easily while submerged. At first, he simply continues his stretches. One leg bent and pulled back, then the other.
Giving himself a moment to breathe, Gridman nods. "Vit has had the least success connecting with others. Even when I was trapped within Junk, I had more strong bonds than he did. He tried to tell me his online connections were every bit as good as those in Tsutsujidai, but now that the web is unavailable." Yellow eyes close, and Gridman's brow furrows with worry. "I worried he would spiral into great distress."
"But he did not." Gridman opens his eyes, and another ephemeral smile crosses his face. "And I credit you with that, Ennil. I... admit, since I never met you as myself... I was extremely surprised to know that my comrades trusted you so. Certainly I felt the same, as who I thought was Yuta. But I'd never met you as 'Gridman'." An arm is raised now, held above his head, bent, and stretched.
"I know you're a pilot, I know you're brave and trustworthy. Kind and skilled." Gridman says, switching arms. "But there's more to you than simply that. And I believe Vit has seen that, more than any of us."
<Pose Tracker> Ennil El has posed.
She's very careful with Gridman as he stands. That waver gets a momentary brace of his other arm, and eventually he's up and moving. "No problem. And yeah. We'll have to find a way to celebrate next year, no matter where we all end up."
"I'm someone who gets lonely easily," Ennil admits, moving alongside the pool as Gridman works his way down the ramp. "So I think I understand. He mostly thinks about himself as someone with... a task, or mission? Even our first date was kind of like that, at first - he wanted to make sure everything went perfectly. He doesn't really know what to expect from people, I think - so learning about them that way is easier." She crouches for a moment, and... doesn't quite wince when she sees that scar, but there's a wobble in her eyes.
She might be used to it, but reminders of pain are never easy. Gridman's still wounded. And something else lingers on her tongue, though she can't quite bring herself to spit it out.
Akane stabbed Yuta to get at Gridman. If Yuta returns to a normal life... it's going to be with one more scar, one he might not understand.
Those pale golden eyes make a little more sense to her.
"But... the more time we spend together, the more I can tell he's enjoying it. Like he's really there with me, and not just working through a task, y'know?"
<Pose Tracker> Gridman has posed.
"Ennil," Gridman begins, seriously. "I do not know if I will still be here next year. Once I defeat Alexis Kerib, I should return home. I must have a home, somewhere. My comrades can choose to join me or stay as they wish. But Yuta Hibiki deserves to have his body back, and I have no place in this world."
It's a serious admission, one he hasn't voiced to anyone else. Just as before, "Yuta" had spoken of his worries about his parents to Ennil alone, Gridman chooses to trust her with this new fear.
Gridman moves to what appears to be dance warm up exercises, now. The water supports him as he moves into a set of plies. Though his movements are made a little stilted by pain, there's still grace, built up from Gridman's practice in the dance club.
"Of all my comrades, Vit has been the most dedicated to our mission. I understand there was some conflict over healing Yuta's body versus repairing Junk. In the end, both were necessary, and I'm thankful for both Vit and Max's refusal to back down on their beliefs." A quiet laugh, as Ennil goes on about their date. "Did he bring out his plane models? No, I suppose that wouldn't be very suave..."
Pausing after he finishes the plies, Gridman wipes some sweat from his brow. "I'm truly glad to hear he's treating you properly and not relying on his 'persona'. I wasn't overly worried, but, you deserve this, Ennil. Kindness and enjoyment. Fun with someone who cares about you."
<Pose Tracker> Ennil El has posed.
Ennil straightens out and paces back to the start of the ramp. Gridman's tone is serious and honest. It calls to mind that other night.
"Hey. So what?" Her tone starts out a little teasing, but it settles into serious as she goes on, "I didn't say I wanted to celebrate with Yuta, did I? I mean. He's invited, obviously, but... It's your birthday, Gridman. If you go missing, I'm just gonna track you down! Or find a way to call you!"
Her toes touch the edge of the ramp, just far enough that Gridman's movements won't splash any water back on her suit. Chlorine would ruin it. Still, part of her wants to plunge in and hug him. For a superhero, he's kinda soft.
"Even if you gotta go... It's not like we're gonna forget you were ever here. You might say we never met, but we made a promise. Are you gonna take it back? I know... I know you still remember..."
It's a little mean to circle behind him like this, knowing how hard it'll be for him to turn around, but. This way she can wait until her eyes stop blurring up to look at his face again.
<Pose Tracker> Gridman has posed.
Gridman blinks. Once, twice. Yellow eyes are wide and... bright, at Ennil's words. "You... do? But, to you, Yuta was the one you bonded with. I have never even fought by your side as my true self. How is it that you can care for me? I'm..."
Not a person, Gridman thinks, but he's been assured to the contrary. Ennil comes close, risking her prized suit. Stopping his exercises entirely, Gridman stares up at her. As she suspects, it takes him slow movements to turn and follow her, buying Ennil the time she needs to compose herself.
"I remember. I... believe so much in that future." He keeps it in the present tense. He has to. "No. I will not take it back. I simply --"
Rejection flashes before his eyes. Akane. Eisen. Asuka. Shinji, almost.
"Blue for the summer sky, and gold for victory." Gridman says, quietly. His eyes shimmer, reflected light from the pool below him shining up. Or are those yellow depths filling on their own? "That was still me. Even if I didn't know it. It's still what I want."
A breath, and then another. Gridman half-wobbles in the water, his heart accelerating. Panic -- he knows this feeling. It's difficult to breathe, as though a kaiju has its hands around his neck once again.
"I want that so much. But -- I can't exist here without hurting people, and stealing the life of a young man. What choice do I have? What can be done?"
<Pose Tracker> Ennil El has posed.
"That's wrong," Ennil says, softly. Her fingers go to her wrists, pushing up her jacket sleeves, loosening cuffs. "You were by my side, once." She shoves each up to the elbow, leaning forward. She doesn't want to plunge into the water and ruin her suit. It's a precious gift.
But she can at least extend a hand.
"Twice, actually. Maybe you feel different now... maybe you don't understand how you felt back then. But however you feel tomorrow, we're friends today, right?"
It hurts her to see him so unsure. In that way, he's still a lot like he was when the two of them shared coffee. She smiles at him, the corner of her eyes still damp despite her best efforts.
"You have to do what you can right now, right? To protect this place... and defeat Alexis. But when the time comes... Why don't you ask Yuta what he thinks? He's been sleeping all this time but... I don't think he's a bad kid."
<Pose Tracker> Gridman has posed.
"I was?" Gridman frowns gently, the express there-and-gone in a heartbeat. "My apologies, battles are so chaotic. Communicating with Yuta and the Neon Genesis Junior High Students takes up much of my mental capabilities."
Ennil reaches out. Gridman, slowly, walks toward her. Her words are familiar, and they touch his heart.
"Yes." Reaching out, he takes Ennil's hand. "We're friends today. More than that, now. You're a part of who we are. A comrade."
Yellow eyes shimmer. As close as Gridman is to Ennil now, she can tell there's tears in his eyes. "Defeating Alexis Kerib is my purpose. Saving Akane and protecting Tsutsujidai are what I want, more than anything. I love this place, my city."
"Asking Yuta..." Gridman closes his eyes. The pain he feels at having to use an innocent young man to accomplish his mission is clear in the slump of his shoulders. "I feel like I don't even have the right to speak with him. But I have recently been told it would be cowardice to simply retreat and leave the situation for everyone here to deal with."
A shuddering breath. Yellow eyes open again, and for a moment, Gridman looks every bit the young teenage boy, dragged into something far bigger than he is. "Ennil. I trust you. What would you do, if you were in my place?"
<Pose Tracker> Ennil El has posed.
Ennil's lip twists up a little in a slow smile. "You're right, we've never fought kaiju together. But we've been friends ever since that night at Aya. You made the decision to be kind even though I could have been dangerous. Was dangerous, even. I was ready to fight a battle I wouldn't have survived and you changed that." She squeezes the hand that takes hers tightly. "So, I want to help you fight your battles, too."
Seeing those tears, and his anxiety... A little bit of Ennil wants to run away, even now. What if she says the wrong thing? Gridman is so vulnerable right now. Still healing from one terrible injury. He feels unworthy of Yuta's trust. It's still hard for her to feel worthy of his, sometimes. There's still something miserable inside her.
But he also called her a comrade. Supporting Gridman is her mission - and more than protecting Tsutsujidai, she wants others to see it as a city full of care. That's worth holding out for. "I think you should. He has a right to tell you how he feels, don't you think?" She struggles a little longer to answer his question. She's... not always made the best decisions, and she doesn't know anything about being a hero.
"Gridman... I don't know how to fight for things like 'justice'. I've never been big enough or strong enough to protect the world. So I just focus on the things in front of me. I just want to protect the happiness of the people I care about. For a normal person like me, it's hard to do anything more." Those soft blue eyes track down, shimmering with reflected light from the pool. "Sometimes that's led me in the wrong direction, but... As long as I'm alive, I get to keep trying tomorrow. And along the way, I've met so many people that make me stronger. I think that's the most important thing I can tell you."
<Pose Tracker> Gridman has posed.
"We'd just woken up from Akane's dream, Rikka and I." Gridman murmurs, his eyes faraway. "In a way, I feel as though I've woken up from another dream, now. But, Ennil, you were kind just as we were. All of us were exhausted after that battle, and perfectly vulnerable. You could've destroyed us, easily." Squeezing her hand in return, he looks up at her, something resolute in his gaze. "We'll fight for each other. And with each other. It's what comrades do."
Gridman sniffles, then chuckles lightly, embarrassed. "I'm so used to having a face made of metal. I have all of the memories of being in this body, too, but they feel more distant. Crying feels unnatural."
"You're right. He deserves to know, and be able to express himself about everything I've done." A few tears make it down Gridman's face, very much not made of metal. "I'm far more scared to face him than I am to face Alexis Kerib."
Yellow eyes, despite their tears, focus intently on Ennil. "Justice... I think justice is doing the right thing, for the people around you. One step at a time. Even Giants of Light can't do more than that. In a way, you're already accomplishing this, aren't you? Supporting me, caring about Akane... Isn't that justice?"
Gridman wishes he could heft himself up onto the edge of the pool and hug Ennil, but that's beyond him for now. And it'd ruin her suit. Instead, he simply brings his other hand up, putting it around Ennil's as well. It's a hug of sorts.
"I don't think you're anything close to normal. You're extraordinary. The bonds we've made, they're real. And we have a responsibility to them. Neither of us can afford to give up, can we?"
In a very teenage-boy like gesture, Gridman hunches one of his shoulders, using his sleeve to wipe his eyes. Another little sniffle. "At some point, fighting for others means fighting against your own worst impulses. We owe it to the people we love, not to abandon them, or hurt them because of our own weakness. It's a heavy burden."
<Pose Tracker> Ennil El has posed.
"I..." And now she's crying too, after trying so hard to not burden Gridman with her tears. She wraps another hand around his. "I'm still not sure. It feels so bad to tell you that. I'm scared too."
She shakes her head, that little ponytail hanging loosely, her voice tight. "But you're right, I can't give up. I was scared you were going to. You seemed so hurt, and tired, I thought... I thought you might only care about beating Alexis, and forget about wanting a future for yourself. The one you said I could be in too. The other way is... too terrible to think about."
It feels selfish. This is a day about helping Gridman get better, and he's supporting her. But... They can both work to help each other, right?
"I'm doing the best I can. For myself and everyone. But... because I trust you... I want to also trust you to stop me if I go too far. So that I can come back and be with the people I care about." She sighs, a little bit of guilt in her eyes. "Telling you this means... Vit will probably know, the next time you fight together, that I asked you for this. But I don't know how to ask him. He'd think he wasn't doing enough to make me happy. Nothing could be further from the truth."
Slowly, that smile spreads across her face, even if her eyes can't easily match them. "But I want him to know it's so that I can come back. I'm sorry to ask you to carry something so heavy. You're going to have to get strong again, Gridman. I'll help you."
<Pose Tracker> Gridman has posed.
"I..." Gridman tries to clear his throat, trying in turn to keep his composure, but fails. He sniffles, shaking his head. "I've been thinking about it. My purpose is to destroy Alexis. And even now, if he appeared, I'd go to fight him. Even if it destroyed me. It's something only I can do."
"But I owe you more than that. The rest of my comrades, too, and the Gridman Alliance. My friends, my allies... They deserve more than that. You helped me realize this. I can't use them and then disappear. And..." More tears, now, as Gridman's shoulders tremble. It's shameful. It's against his mission. "I want more. I want to stay with my friends."
Gridman gasps out a little breath as Ennil continues. His red eyebrows are drawn together in distress. He lowers his head to press against their twined hands, quietly sobbing for a moment.
"Ennil. I will. But I swear to you, before it gets to that point, I'll do whatever it takes to save you. We all will. And I'll ask the same thing of you." Drawing his courage together, Gridman raises his gaze to Ennil's face. "If I fail in destroying Alexis Kerib, please. Take up the fight for me. And take care of Akane."
"You're right that Vit will take this hard." Gridman says, his voice ringing with an robotic echo. "But I understand the necessity of it." A steadying breath, and he manages another barely-there smile. "We'll carry it together. All of us."
With one more squeeze to Ennil's hands, Gridman nods. "Right!" He says, loud and clear. "I can't let something as small as this hold me back!" Stepping back a few paces, he again starts on his exercises, working the muscles in his core to return them back to their proper state. A few tears still glimmer in his eyes, but now they appear as a sign of resolve.
<Pose Tracker> Ennil El has posed.
"That's right. And your friends want you here, too. Moving forward's a lot easier with a destination in mind." For just a moment, she reaches out a hand, setting it on that unruly red hair. "Keep looking ahead, Gridman. I love that optimism of yours."
She gives his hand another friendly squeeze, holding steady as he works through his concern for her. "I guess that's fair. If we share those burdens, they'll be less heavy, don't you think?" She matches those gold eyes with her own, giving a small, resolute nod. "I can't give up on that, either. Akane deserves to be saved... That's the promise we made, and I'm not going to take it back. Thank you for standing with me on this. It's been eating at me, the past few days."
Gridman steps back, and she stretches back up, stepping carefully back from the ramp and straightening out her sleeves again. She watches Gridman start his exercises again, smiling broadly at the Hyper Agent. In a lot of ways, he doesn't seem out of place at all as a young man, for a 70m tall guy with a metal face...