2022-12-18: Sometimes I Wonder How You Can Still Think That
- Cast: Anita Rosetta, Rena Lancaster
- Where: Ra Mari
- Date: U.C. 0096 12 18
- Summary: After things are resolved on Denver Colony, Rena goes to check on Anita. They talk, but they also reach an important conclusion.
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
Denver Colony is secure, and the Ra Mari is on its way back. The Mobile Suits and Variable Fighters were all collected -- Anita rescued from the damaged Messiah Rosetta -- and Rena finally has a chance to breathe. Also, she had a shower, which is a wonder after several days inside of a colony without access. But, there is someone she has to check on.
She shows up at the door to Anita's room. It's no surprise, really; Rena has had her ups and downs, but she has always had a habit of checking up on friends after something bad happened.
And to say she has been worried would be an understatement.
She knocks on the door, standing outside, and then says: "Hey, Annie? It's me, Rena. Are you in there? I can come back later, if you'd rather..."
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
Anita has been pretty quiet ever since everyone got back from Denver Colony. She hasn't let much show outwardly, so some might take it for her usual calm nature... But her friends, those who have been with her for so long, can tell that she's more withdrawn than usual. It's understandable, after a fight like that.
She stuck around to oversee the transport of her Valkyrie and any official business before slipping away, grabbing a shower herself before heading to her room. That's where she is now - laying sprawled out on her bed, staring up at the ceiling. And then, she hears a knock on the door. Rena...
There's a moment of quiet and then, finally, a response.
"Oh, hey, Rena. Nah, it's fine. C'mon in." Anita says. She gets up, makes her way over to the door to unlock it before returning to her bed, sitting on the edge of it.
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
Rena could figure it out, of course. She can't know exactly what is bothering Anita -- she might be an empath, she might have a way of picking up on emotions, but that doesn't magically tell her what someone is thinking. But between her Newtype abilities and just knowing Anita, she can tell when something is wrong.
She feels tense in the moment of quiet. A little part of her worries Anita won't answer.
But she still smiles, when Anita opens the door. Rena nods, and walks into the room -- eyes briefly on the Haro -- before she looks back at Anita. She waves a hand, fingers curling a little. "...Hey," she says. She hesitates.
"Ah... you okay?"
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
The wings of Anita's Haro flap in greeting as Rena's eyes linger on it but it doesn't speak, perhaps in recognition of Anita's mood. Rena smiles and Anita smiles back, though it's weak and might not be very convincing. Rena greets her, and asks if she's okay, and Anita nods.
"...Yeah. Just a little shaken, is all." She replies. That could maybe be convincing, if it wasn't for the way she then tries to divert away from the topic of how she's doing. "That sure was something, wasn't it...? All of that. Who woulda thought following that signal would've lead us to a place like that..."
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
"It's definitely not what I expected to spend the last few days doing, that's for certain," Rena says, with a little smile. She walks closer to Anita. She hesitates for a second -- and then she sits down on the bed next to Anita, before she glances sideways at her. She hesitates for a second.
She wonders if she should press. It might be better to not, to respect her privacy. Except..
Except she should be there for Anita, and not just brush this off. "...please?" she says, meeting her eyes. "I can tell you're upset. I-I don't want to just ignore it, Annie. You've listened to me when I'm having a tough time. I want to be there for you, too."
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
"Hahah... Right?" Anita replies, managing a small laugh. She watches Rena move closer, and spots that hesitation... and moves over a bit, making some room for her to the right on the bed. They sit there in silence for a moment... until, Rena meets her eyes.
Anita... doesn't respond right away. She stares down at the floor, hands clasped together, right thumb tracing the metal lines of her left hand. It's something she always does when she's worried or nervous. ...But, Rena has asked her so earnestly, and so, she eventually speaks. She shuts her eyes tight, grasping her forehead with her left hand.
"...It's just... God. I was so scared. I thought I was gonna die... I thought you and Eight might get hurt because I messed up." She murmurs. "And then there was everything before that, not knowing when or if we'd get out... I just..."
She trails off, then, drawn in and looking a little small.
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
Rena watches Anita, carefully. It's the damnable thing about a Coordinator's brain -- they're wired to pay attention to details, to take in every little thing, and catch little details. Now that they know, it's hard to miss how perceptive Rena can be. Life isn't fair.
So she notices. She notices the way Anita's eyes shut tight; the way her right thumb traces along metal lines; how she looks small.
Rena is quiet for a second. With her eyes closed, Anita probably feels it before she sees it: Rena's hand resting atop her right hand, while her left is at her forehead.
"Annie," she says, softly. It's not just because she is a Coordinator that she noticed, though. Rena noticed because it's Anita. "...I was terrified too. But I didn't think -- not once -- that you messed up. You're still -- you're always -- the coolest person I know."
She squeezes her hand. Rena hesitates, before she keeps speaking. "I thought... if you died, because of someone wanting to hurt me, I could never forgive myself. Because if someone took you away, they're taking away one of the brightest parts of my world."
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
Anita can feel it - Rena's hand resting atop hers. It's... why she likes to position her friends on her right side, when she can help it. As many neat features as her cybernetics have, one thing they lack is a true sense of touch. Anita's eyes open and she looks over to Rena as she speaks, her left arm falling once again to her leg.
"...Sometimes I wonder how you can still think that. You know a lot of cool people now, you gotta know someone cooler than me." Anita murmurs with a shake of her head. Rena squeezes her hand and continues and Anita - Anita finds herself without words for a second. "I..."
...She hesitates for a second.
"...Ah, geez... I dunno what to say to that..." She murmurs, a bit sheepishly. It's hard to stand in the face of her sincerity... "I... I wouldn't want to make you go through that."
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
"If I've met a lot more people, and they're really cool, then it just speaks to how cool you are," Rena says with a lopsided smile. She stays on Anita's right side, even with her hand atop Annie's. She smiles at her.
"S-Sorry," she says. "I got a little carried away, huh? But..."
She hesitates.
"...What I'm saying is, you being scared doesn't make you less cool to me. It doesn't make you less anything to me," she says. "You're still... everything I just said. It's okay to be scared, Annie. I'm scared, too. And... even if you did mess up," she says. "We'll be there to pick each back up, okay? Like both of you've done for me."
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
Rena's assurance... gets a small laugh out of Anita, and a smile - a genuine one this time.
"Guess so, in that case..." She replies, then shakes her head. "...Nah, it's fine. Kinda like seeing you get carried away, bein' honest."
But... she says that being scared doesn't make her less cool, less anything. Anita falls quiet for a moment. They'll be there to pick each other back up... After a moment more, Anita's hand shifts, taking Rena's hand and giving it a gentle squeeze in return.
"...Yeah." She murmurs with a nod. "...Sorry. I guess... wasn't really thinking about how you musta felt after all that. ...How about you, are you okay?"
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
"Maybe I should more often," Rena says, and she doesn't quite make eye contact when she says that. She looks back after a moment, though, and she smiles.
She squeezes Anita's hand back, then.
"No, it's okay. I... I don't mind, really, you didn't put me out. It's nice, being the one who gets to be there for you." She hesitates for a second, then.
"I'm... I'm doing okay," she says. "I'm not just saying that. I still feel overwhelmed. So much happened--and with the Phenex, too. But... I got to help save the colony, with her power. And the Gaia Gear. And I saved you, too. I... don't have an answer for Zoltan. And I worry that maybe Yuliana's right, that I'm obsolete and won't amount to anything."
Rena looks down for a second, at their hands, still together. She hesitates. "...But I feel like maybe I'm worth more than that. Like maybe I'll figure it out, eventually. Maybe I'm not okay, but I'm getting better."
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
Anita laughs at that, her mood finally easing into a better one thanks to Rena. She smiles, too, as Rena says that it was nice being able to be there for her.
"...You were pretty cool, yourself, there." Anita says. Rena tells her how she's doing then. Overwhelmed, after everything. ...But she got to help. Anita nods quietly for a moment as Rena considers her worth... and then, she smiles.
"...Well. You're worth the world to me. And Eight, too. That's a good start, right?" She replies. "I know you'll get there, Rena."
SCENESYS: Leina Ashta has posted scene #234, 'An Evening in Dublin', at 07:30 ET on 01/04.
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
"Y-Yeah? I wasn't trying to be, but..." Rena smiles. "I should just take the compliment, huh? Thanks, Annie."
Rena glances sideways at her -- and her cheeks turn a little red after a moment. "I'm glad. Um. Th-that I am, I mean." She nods, before she looks back up at the ceiling. "Thanks. I hope so."
She sits there, quietly, for a moment. Her hand slips away, as Rena's eyebrows furrow. She works through something in her head.
"Hey, Annie..."
SCENESYS: Leina Ashta has posted scene #235, 'An Evening in Dublin', at 19:30 ET on 01/04.
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
"No problem." Anita replies as Rena accepts her compliment. She can't help but smirk as she spots Rena's blush, and nods. "Yeah. Just keep at it."
Rena goes quiet and her hand slips away so Anita's hands return her lap, though her attention remains on Rena. She seems to be thinking something through, so she waits until she's ready.
"Yeah? What's up?" She asks.
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
"So... um. You know how me and Eight are. With her Lahvi, and things." Rena doesn't quite make eye contact at first. She looks nervous -- which isn't new, exactly, as Rena often looks nervous. But this is a different sort of nervousness. For one, her hands clasp together, a little too tightly.
But, she eventually gets the nerve to look Anita in the eye. "...And I'm not sure how you feel, about someone being close to more than one person, like that."
She takes a deep breath. Then, mentally, gives herself a shove.
"So... it's okay, if the answer's no. It doesn't change anything between us." She wrinkles her nose. She is rambling. "But... do you wanna go on a date sometime?"
EFFORT TO NOT HIDE UNDER THE BED: successful!
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
"Yeah?" Anita replies with a nod as Rena starts. Is she... trying to ask for advice? But, no... as Rena continues, Anita can kind of tell where she's going. She doesn't interrupt her - she doesn't want to do anything to derail her train of thought, when it's clearly taking her so much effort. Though... she'd be lying if she said she wasn't starting to feel a little nervous...
And then, Rena says it! She asks if she wants to go on a date sometime. ...She'd braced herself for it, but... it's still unexpected and a surprise when she actually asks. Anita is quiet for about a solid minute. She looks down, staring at her left arm for a moment. She seems... conflicted, before looking back up to Rena. She might not have been the only one who needed to give herself a mental shove.
"With... me? Y...Yeah! That... That'd be fun, actually." She says with a sheepish laugh, massaging the back of her neck. "As... as long as you're... sure."
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
Rena watches Anita while she works through it, silently. Being a Newtype means she can feel some of the conflicted emotions -- the conflict but not the thoughts behind them. It makes her more nervous in turn, but she makes herself sit still -- and watch -- and wait. She promised it was okay, however she answered, and that's more than a statement. It's an action.
But that doesn't mean that she doesn't grin when Anita gives her answer. "Y-Yeah, I'm sure, Annie. I... um... I'd been thinking about it. So..."
She holds her hand back out, for Anita to take, if she wants it. "...Maybe next week? We can pick a place! On Londenion or Earth or maybe even Island Frontier or--" She laughs. "I-I'm getting a little flustered, huh."
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
Rena says she's sure. That she'd been thinking about it. If it were anyone else... Anita would wonder if they'd really thought through everything. But, Rena - she trusts her. And so, Anita nods. Rena isn't the only one feeling a little flustered... but, this has been a moment for emotional sincerity, so it's okay for her to let down the walls. She doesn't always have to be the cool-and-collected Anita.
Rena offers her her hand again and Anita takes it. She smiles, and laughs a little.
"...Yeah, next week... next week sounds good." She says. "We can play it by ear."
Rena says she's getting flustered, and Anita smiles.
"Hey, it's okay. ...I kinda am, too." She replies, and then admits, "This is, uh - I'm not really used to this sort of thing..."
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
Rena turns red again, when Anita takes her hand. She squeezes it, and if Anita isn't cool and collected right now... well, Rena certainly doesn't think she lacks in coolness. "Y-Yeah," she says, as she smiles. "We'll figure out a place to go."
She scoots over, a little closer. "It's okay. We can figure it out as we go." She leans over, then, and puts her head on Anita's shoulder. She sighs, happily.
"...by the way, I got you two Christmas gifts because I was on revision eighteen of my shopping list," Rena says. "So there's the just-friends gift and the dating-for-less-than-a-week gift."
A beat.
"Also the aromantic apology petunia, but I think I'm going to not give you that, it doesn't seem necessary."
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
"Yeah." Anita replies with a nod and a smile. They'll figure it out. They've got a lot of things to figure out, but like Rena says, they can figure it out as they go. Rena scoots closer, and then leans over, resting her head on her shoulder. Anita goes still for a moment, and then breathes out. She reminds herself that this is okay, and relaxes.
...And then, Rena brings up the Christmas gifts. Anita chuckles, at that.
"Wow, you'd been plannin' this for a while, huh...? That's so you." Anita replies... and then pauses, and laughs as Rena continues.
"...Yeah, I think we're good there. But... I appreciate that you thought about it." She says, echoing Rena's gesture and leaning into her in return.