2022-11-05: Spitbreak's Fallout
- Cast: Rena Lancaster, Anita Rosetta
- Where: Ra Mari
- Date: U.C. 0096 11 05
- Summary: Rena and Anita talk after Operation Spitbreak. There are so many questions and so few answers, but there is a connection.
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
The afterglow of the weapon at JOSH-A has faded...
But only recently. Rena is making her way to the ready room -- she is a little behind Anita. The feeling of all those deaths, weighing on her, was hard for her to shake completely. She took a moment, before she comes to the lounge that pilots have. It's a few chairs around tables, with some drinks -- waters, juices, and teas -- for them to recover.
They're the only ones here. Rena opens the door a little, peeking her head through, and peering in at Anita.
"Hey, Annie..." She trails off, unsure what to say. Today has been hard. She looks at her friend, her brown eyes locked on her... and her expression worn down.
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
Anita never looked back, but she could still see that golden light out of the corner of her eyes and in the reflections of her cockpit. Sometimes, it feels like that light is still there, lurking at the edge of her vision. It's... a lot. Destruction and loss of life, on that scale...
...Well, that's probably why she booked it right to the ready room. She hasn't been in for long - just long enough to take a seat and pour herself a glass. Normally, she goes for juices with a special preference for anything incredibly sweet. Today, though, she goes for the tea - they have some teas here that supposedly help calm the nerves, and she could use that. She looks up at the door, though, as Rena peeks in and offers her a smile. It's a little strained. That's probably not much of a surprise from anyone who went through what they just did.
"Hey, Rena." Anita greets in return. She notes the way she trails off and her worn down expression, and elects to take initiative.
"C'mon in, take a seat. Want me to pour you something?" She asks. She reaches over, grabbing one of the chairs and dragging it a bit closer to her own.
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
Rena smiles back at Anita. It's strained, too. It's nice, she thinks, being here with Anita. Right now, a Newtype might pick up everything she felt -- the many things from that battle that bother her. With Anita, she can work through it a little slowly.
Though, she thinks back to what Yuliana said... and the doubt is there, for a moment.
She wishes she could say it vanishes easily.
"Thanks," she says. She walks over -- sitting in the chair closest to Anita. Then, she scoots the chair closer, with that tell-tale scrape of metal legs across a laminated floor. "I'll take the tea. How... um... how are you doing?"
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
With a nod, Anita pours Rena a glass of tea, setting it in front of her. She smiles a little more genuinely when Rena scoots her chair closer to her own. ...It's nice. Now's definitely the sort of time when she needs to company of friends. As for how she's doing...
"...That's... a little hard to tell right now." She admits with a shrug. "Now that the adrenaline's worn off, uh... shaken, kind of overwhelmed? It's, uh... it's all kind of a jumble."
Horrified too, maybe. She shakes her head, briefly, before looking back to Rena.
"...How about you? How're you holding up?" She asks.
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
Rena takes the tea, lifting it up. Her hand doesn't shake, as she takes a sip. Her eyes look at Annie, and she seems to consider for a moment, before she nods. "Shaken, overwhelmed..."
She repeats the word, then she sighs. "That's me, too. A lot happened. All those people dying, I--um--I felt it, when they were just... gone." She stares off into the distance for a moment.
Then she swallows.
"...And what the commander said," she says, her voice quieter. "About Coordinators."
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
Anita's eyes meet Rena's, broken only as she takes a sip from her own glass. She listens, then, as Rena repeats the words and offers her own story. Anita grimaces sympathetically.
"...You felt it? ...I'm... I'm sorry, that must be awful." She replies, shaking her head in disbelief. That's something she can't imagine - feeling so many presences, and then they just... vanish. She can only guess at the enormity of things - it's a far different beast to be able to feel it.
And then, the commander... There are a lot of things she could say about him. But he's gone now, even if his impact isn't.
"...Yeah." Anita mutters. "I'm sorry you had to hear that. That was... way out of line."
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
Rena hesitates a second, though she doesn't look away from Anita as she does. "It's... it was rough," she admits, a little quietly. "Feeling it. I'm not sure how to describe. I'm glad you didn't, but--I know, um, it's... it's not like it wasn't hard for you, too."
She sounds a little awkward. How does she describe something that she just feels? Some of Yuliana's words come back to her, again.
She swallows, then she nods. "Yeah. It was. But, it made me think... that's what a lot of people think," she says. "If they learn, they're... they're not even going to see me as human. And..."
Rena sighs. "I'm trying to be supportive of you and I'm complaining, huh."
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
"Don't force it, if you don't wanna dwell on it." Anita replies, shaking her head. She can't imagine it's a pleasant feeling to revisit - she doesn't Rena to be there just for her sake any longer than she needs to. "...But, yeah."
What she says next, though... Anita frowns. It's something there's no easy response to. She could try to say that it won't be that bad, or that she shouldn't pay them any mind... but, it'd feel a little hypocritical. After all, she still covers up her cybernetics when she's out in public. She massages the back of her neck.
"...There's always gonna be people like that, I guess." She murmurs. "If anyone gives you trouble about it... we'll just have to set 'em straight."
Rena says that she's complaning, and Anita shakes her head.
"...Hey, it goes both ways. I'm here to support you and you're here to support me. It's fine." She says... and then, she manages, a smirk. "...Honestly, it'd probably do you some good if you complained a little more."
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
"No, it's okay," Rena says, with a shake of her head. "I don't... you know, I wanna talk about that kind of thing with you. I know you can't feel that, like I can, but... I don't want to leave you out of that kind of thing, either, Annie." Rena says that a little quietly, and she breaks eye contact for a moment.
She feels a little flustered, saying that, though she can't quite say why.
Then, she makes eye contact again, and considers. Then, she nods. "Yeah," she says. "I know you have my back. And Eight and Dr. Bidan. I'm trying to not feel guilty about that."
She hesitates, though, and then Rena smiles back at the smirk. She rests her chin in her hand. "I-I could learn to complain more!" she tells Anita, earnestly. "I'd have to think about what, but I'm sure I can do it!"
This... may not be what Anita meant.
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
Rena assures her that she does want to talk about that sort of thing with her, that she doesn't want to leave her out of it. Anita smiles, a little.
"...Thanks. I appreciate that, Rena." Anita admits. "It's good to know you feel comfortable sharing it with me, so I can do what I can to help out."
Rena breaks eye contact, for just a moment, and returns Rena's nod with one of her own when she assures her that she knows she and the others have her back.
"Good. 'Cause we won't let you forget it." Anita replies, offering her a smile.
And then... she's honestly taken aback by her earnest response, and the follow.
"Th-that's, uh, not quite what I..." She starts... and then, lets out a resigned sigh. "Y'know what? That's a good enough start."
She has to start somewhere, she supposes...
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
"I'm glad," Rena says, with a smile. She idly tugs on some of her bangs -- the ones dyed red, forming that comet-like streak in her hair -- when she smiles back at Anita. "And I know you will. Um... help out. Or let me forget you have my back."
She keeps smiling, though she tilts her head to the side. Anita looks a little taken aback -- and while Rena might be an empath, she can't quite figure out why. Her eyes blink once, before she keeps smiling.
"I'll do my best, then!" she says.
Yet, she doesn't complain.
But, she does look thoughtful for a moment -- that scrunched up look, like she is about to say or ask something. Then, Rena does ask it, instead of changing the subject. "Hey, um. Does... it bug you, sometimes? I mean, that--the difference between us. The whole... mental connection I've got with Eight, because of... I guess because of being Newtypes."
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
"Always." Anita confirms. And Rena confirms that she'll do her best. Well... Anita will just have to keep an eye on her, to make sure that she does, in fact, find something to complain about.
...But, there's a thoughtful look on her face, so Anita's attention is on Rena. She asks... a difficult question. Anita frowns, considering her answer. In this situation, and considering everything that's happened... it'd be best to be honest. If she spare's Rena's feelings now, it might build into something much worse later.
"...Well, I wouldn't say it bugs me, but... I guess I do feel a little jealous sometimes." Anita admits, scratching the back of her head. "You just... connect on a level I can't, feel things I can't. It's a world I'll never know."
She shakes her head, staring into her tea for a moment.
"...I don't have a problem with it. I just..." She frowns, thinking on it for a moment. "...Wonder what it's like, sometimes."
She's quiet for a moment, before looking back at Rena.
"...But despite whatever that horrible woman says, I'm not gonna go and turn on you over it or anything, either." She assures. "I can handle it."
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
It may take a few nudges. But, that's Rena Lancaster for you.
She stays quiet and listens when Anita answers. There is a little flicker of surprise to hear Anita admit some jealousy -- though she can see why. It is something she took for granted, in a way; Rena had always been able to form those sorts of connections, and she had grown up with a few.
There is, of course, some guilt too. She manages to keep a lid on that; she knows it's not something that she should feel guilty.
"I wish I could show you," Rena admits. "And... I wish I could understand what it's like, to not feel things like that. But, um, if it helps..."
Her hand rests on the table. Her fingers curl against the edge of the table.
"...Even if we don't connect like that, I've always felt like I connect with you," Rena says, her voice quiet. "Maybe it's not like that. But I still connect with you, in our own way, and better than most people I know. And because I want to."
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
"I know. I know that if you could, you would." Anita replies with a nod. She never doubted that - they've done a good job at making sure she felt included, despite the difference in awareness. She goes quiet, though, when Rena continues. And it's clear that it's struck a chord with her by the way she freezes up a bit.
"That's..." Anita starts. She smiles, a bit sheepishly. It's rare, to see her so affected. "...That really does help, thanks. It means a lot to me... It's nice to hear that, sometimes."
<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.
"Mm." Rena nods to Anita. If she could change it, she would. Unfortunately, there's no way to do such a thing that she ever heard of.
She tilts her head, though -- and it's easy to catch that Anita was affected. She hasn't seen that too often before. She smiles, looking a little flustered at that. Her eyes glance to the side and her face reddens. "I-I'm glad. I'll... um... I'll try to say it more, then."
<Pose Tracker> Anita Rosetta has posed.
Anita smiles back, looking a little red herself. She takes another sip of her tea, mostly just to cover her face for a moment as she regains her composure.
"Then I look forward to that." She replies, setting the tea down.