2022-10-20: The Fated Hour
- Cast: Banagher Links, Roux Louka, Judau Ashta
- Where: Side 4: Sweetwater
- Date: U.C. 0096 10 20
- Summary: Roux and Judau treat Banagher to lunch. Surely, nothing more could occur!
<Pose Tracker> Roux Louka has posed.
To her left, the man she loves.
To her right, the boy the man she loves' adored little sister is sweet on.
Roux Louka swirls her straw in her milkshake.
MCDANIELS.
This glorified hamburger shack is one of the GOOD ones. It's got TWO stories. There's a second floor deck where you can have meals in relative privacy and with an excellent view of this side of the colony's sleepy river stream, which is seeing a lot of idyllic-looking boat traffic and a couple of poky little boats.
Roux brought the two others here. She has made a supreme offering. SHE WILL PAY FOR LUNCH. Because they might be here for a while. She has INSISTED things be ordered. SHE WANTS TO SPEND THE FEDERATION'S BLOOD MONEY ON DELICIOUS MEATY TREATS.
Thus far they only got their drinks, because this place is so classy they call you to pick up your food. But not so classy that someone brings it to you. That's the Domon Kasshu economy for you.
"Well, this is nice, isn't it? It's a breezy kind of day," Roux says cheerfully(tm). "I know it's kind of tense out here, but I hope you can both, you know, open up about how you feel. I know these things can be hard to say in words." She shifts back, tilting her chair back a little as she rests one purple-legging'd knee against the edge of the table.
She watches. She feels. And she listens, too.
You don't want to eat a cold burger.
<Pose Tracker> Banagher Links has posed.
Banagher so rarely gets to indulge, but at Roux's insistence, he goes right ahead. Nuggets and fries, along with a cookies-and-cream milkshake... As they're waiting for the order to be ready, Banagher devours the milkshake. He knows he's only here as long as Judau's goodwill lasts, and he wants to eat as much as he can before the older Newtype has enough of him.
"Thank you, Roux." Banagher manages to say, between bites. He's been a little too intimidated to say much to Judau besides an initial greeting. Every so often, he peeks through his bangs at the man. "Yeah, the weather on Sweetwater's been pretty decent. Audrey and I have been taking a lot of walks."
Should he metion Audrey? Too late now. Turning back to his milkshake, Banagher gets a couple more bites in before the sword of Damocles above his head falls. It surely will, soon.
<Pose Tracker> Judau Ashta has posed.
Well, this is nice, isn't it? It's a breezy kind of day.
"Humph. I hate breezes."
MCDANIELS.
THE FATED HOUR.
LUNCH TIME.
So that's about how well this was going so far.
Let it be known: Judau Ashta's opinion on breezes are a mixed thing but he doesn't -really- hate them; he's just being belligerent and lashing out.
Sorry, breezes.
Better the artificial weather be in his crosshairs than other things, at least; the former junker of Shangri-La has taken up the seat opposite Banagher, beside Roux, slumped far back into his seat with arms crossed over his chest and his stare one of those 'Judau Ashta really knows how to hold a grudge' looks that verges between cranky and hungry; let's call it... crangry.
He has, to whit: 1) ordered two whole McHyper Buster Burgers and a party size of fries, 2) complained about the slow service (he has little concept or appreciation for fanciness), 3) caught every single one of Banagher's glances his way. Every. Single. One. 4) slurped up some unholy swirl of milkshake flavors without abandoning his cross-armed position; it's tough, but, that's the power of a Newtype (is it, though).
He's remained relatively quiet throughout the small talk, but, well. It's not why they're here really, is it? They're here -- to GET FREE LUNCH hash things out. And, well.
He's at least had enough time to pass to let Roux try to mediate things and play conversationalist until she chooses to broach things.
Banagher mentions an 'Audrey.' Judau looks sidelong at him in a 'what's an Audrey' kind of way, but he doesn't quite comment on that right now. Instead, he leans forward, eyes set on Banagher.
I know these things can be hard to say in words--
"You screwed up."
Well at least he knows how to put these things into words easily enough.
that's a good start, right
<Pose Tracker> Roux Louka has posed.
Roux had paid for it. ALL of it. The nuggies are going to be actual pieces of sliced chicken, almost fresh enough to be crowing. Banagher has no idea.
It's the good MacDaniel's.
"You're welcome," she tells Banagher with a sunny smile. Her own shake (blueberry, appropriately, which may explain the hair) is swirled a little and then given a slurp as her attention turns momentarily back towards Judau.
Somehow he drank all that stuff without even looking.
So it's going to be like that, Roux thinks. It's a sad sort of feeling. Not a deep sadness. Because Roux's real weapon here is--
Magazines.
"So," Roux says, "I want to say before we get started, do you remember this from that second time you got on the flight line?" this to Judau. "I want to say here, that all of us care a lot about Leina and we all feel like oven baked poop about what happened, and we're all incredibly glad that she's on the mend. Right?"
"So when we talk about this, I want you to use "I Sentences.""
yes
THOSE KINDS of magazines
"This helps everyone keep in the front of their mind that we're talking about our *perspectives* and our *views*. For instance," Roux says, "instead of saying 'The breeze is too cold,' we'd say 'I feel really cold, sitting here in the breeze'. Got it? Anyway," she says, raising her cup to her mouth, "go."
<Pose Tracker> Banagher Links has posed.
Judau finally speaks to him. Banagher jumps, nearly dropping his milkshake. He puts it down on the tray and takes a deep, deep breath. Squaring his shoulders, looking Judau straight in the eye, Banagher manages two words.
"I know."
After that... it's difficult to know what comes next. Leina already forgave him -- but Judau was hurt, too, and not just physically. After what Banagher saw in Leina's memories, he essentially forced the older Ashta to relive the worst day of his entire life, making him every bit as helpless as the last time.
Roux breaks in, with some kind of technique to help the conversation go well. Banagher's willing to try it -- he'd try just about anything these two asked of them. She seems like a really smart lady, anyway.
"Okay, Roux, um -- I'm willing to do -- anything to make up for it. I'm willing to do anything she wants or needs. U--um. I'm willing to do anything you want or need too, Judau."
It feels a little pathetic. Banagher knows these words won't be nearly enough, but he has so little to offer. He's already given Leina all the apologies he could, and he's working to understand the Unicorn better every day, with Nanai.
"I'm sorry, Judau." Banagher keeps eye contact, even though he aches to look anywhere else. "I know there's no way I can make up for this. But -- er -- I will spend my life trying." Banagher has said this once before, in Leina's hospital room. He isn't sure what else he can even offer. But with the way Judau's staring, it feels like he should fill the silence, so--
"U--uh, I am... working to understand the Unicorn so this will... never happen again."
<Pose Tracker> Judau Ashta has posed.
Leina's forgiven Banagher. She was very clear about that. But, well -- Judau is Judau.
For a lot of reasons, right now, this is one of those things he and Leina are going to have to agree to disagree about*.
- shouting match emphatically about
Still; Roux brings up the past, and the simple fact that they're all happy Leina is on the road to recovery. This much is true. However -- Banagher looks him in the eye; he agrees with what Judau says. Somehow, this just makes Judau frown deeper. He's about to expand on why, when--
"--'Eye Sentences'? What the hell--?"
No, wrong thing, Judau.
Thankfully, Roux explains. And with every further second into that explanation, Judau Ashta's gaze turns, s l o w l y, Roux's way, until he is staring. And squinting. And frowning.
And drinking that milkshake.
- slrrrrrr* "Whaaaaaaat." *rrrrp*
Magazines. Judau needs to take care of those magazines. They're becoming dangerous...!
There's a long time after she finishes, just staring, clearly not getting it. "But he screwed up so why would I say I did--" Give him a second. His brows furrow. He feels a dawning headache. This is just -- /terrible/.
"Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh fiiiiiine. Whatever. Whatever! I'll I! I know how pronouns work!" Are you happy now, Roux?! Now he has to actually think about what he's saying before he says it!
And, his power thusly robbed, he just turns his stare Banagher-wards as the young man makes his willingness known to him. Judau slumps back into his chair again.
"All you need t'do is--" wait, no, crap "--I... FEEL... all you need t'do is be honest."
Banagher continues on. Judau considers him, and his words, in silence. His right index finger tapping an agitated pattern against his bicep, he stares, brows furrowing, as the pilot of the Unicorn makes his declaration that he is working on understanding the Unicorn.
"That's not gonna-- ugh, dammit, what's even the point of--" Judau takes a frustrated sip of his drink. DEEP SIP. It's like -- it's just completely emptied out now. It's a -meditative sip-. "I /believe/ that's not gonna help. Like. Fine. You -- I think -- you wanna learn more about it, great. There's obviously some bullshit goin' on there. ... I think there's obviously some bullshit goin' on there." At some point, he's relinquished his arm-folded position to grab his milkshake cup and tip it in a vain attempt to get some of the dregs of his drink; he gestures with the cup, waving it in Banagher's direction.
"I wanna know what you're doin' about you."
<Pose Tracker> Roux Louka has posed.
Roux stares back at Judau as he stares at her. She frowns, just a little. The dawning of darkness.
But then he moves on and starts speaking about things. From what he's saying - Roux looks back towards Banagher and his apologies. Her expression doesn't seem approving either! It's more 'sober and serious' than angry or passionate, but it's not approval either. What do these people want from him!?
Roux takes a deep breath and lets it out. "Banagher," Roux begins, before
- pinpon*
'Louka, order number 10-10... Louka, order for six... Customer named Louka, please come get your order'
"That's us," Roux says, swishing around in a sweep of hair and hastening inside and then down the stairs to fetch the meal!
Which is on a very full tray, especially since Roux is going to be gone like a full two minutes before she can get all the condiments, bonus straws, dipping sauces and so forth in order.
For the moment, the two are left alone with each other.
Roux's milkshake makes a very very soft 'fuooooh' sound, if you listen super close, where the breeze is blowing over the straw.
<Pose Tracker> Banagher Links has posed.
Banagher watches Judau's confusion with a perplexed expression of his own. His gaze jumps between Judau and Roux. In a way, they're every bit as connected as he and Leina are -- maybe, probably even more. Somehow these drastically different individuals feel perfectly harmonious. It brings a little smile to Banagher's face, one which he quickly hides in a bite of his milkshake. Don't want Judau to think Banagher's making fun of him or something.
It takes the older Ashta sibling a while to get his words out. Banagher steadily watches. His stare might be a little unnerving -- he's trying /so/ hard to understand Judau.
"Be -- um. I need to be honest?" Banagher says, puzzled. "I think I have been..."
Banagher stares up at the speaker as it calls Roux's name. She's off before he can say anything, and Banagher's courage fails him, just a bit. Without Roux keeping the peace... What's going to happen? Slowly, Banagher turns back to Judau. Anxiety is clear on his face.
"I wanna know what you're doin' about you."
"I'm... what I'm..." Banagher starts, trying to think it over. Didn't he already say he was working with the Unicorn? What else is there? "..."
Another glance off in the direction Roux left. What does Judau want?
<Pose Tracker> Judau Ashta has posed.
What does Judau want?
Roux is on the verge of sharing her own thoughts when she is summoned away by the promise of food; sea green eyes watch as she leaves, and the former junker's frowning frustration is forgotten for a moment as he flags the fleeing Roux.
"Hey! Don't forget the sauce I like! You know -- the reddish one! With the pow!" he calls out to her. What sauce is it?
He doesn't know, he forgot the name.
He's sure she'll remember.
"... shit, was I supposed to do I Sentences for that too?"
These are the worried (sort of) musings of Judau Ashta as Roux disappears down to the base floor. They're not to last, though; soon, he's turning that question on Banagher. And soon...
I'm... what I'm...
He receives trailing uncertainty in response.
Banagher's anxiety is clear as day in these moments, even if Judau wasn't a Newtype. The confusion, too. And as Banagher's attention strays in Roux's direction --
Judau frowns. He grabs his milkshake cup.
And he just -shoves- it until the thing slides across the table on an angry collision course with Banagher's.
"I feel -- that's what's pissin' me off!" he declares, because, he cares about Roux -that much- that he'll put in a good faith effort towards I Sentencing for like at least ten seconds when she's not present. That's love.
"I remember the first time we met, you talked about what you an' the Unicorn had to do. I remember you talkin' about how you wanted there to be no more war," and that is a dream he really wants too, but-- "but y'know what? Whatever's in that stupid box isn't gonna solve that, I don't care if it's, like, the treasure map to fifty trillion pounds of space gold or the Newtype God's ultimate pancake recipe" judau's needs are simple and thus translate to his worldview as such "An' you're sure as hell not, the way you are right now! What's the point of understanding the Unicorn if you can't even figure out your own damn self?! This awful shit, it's gonna keep happenin', and it's gonna get -worse- the more -desperate- everyone gets, an' the next time you lose control, what, how sorry are you gonna feel when you do something you REALLY can't take back--"
Judau, teeth grit, finds his words hanging. In frustration, he throws his hands up and slumps back.
"I feel!" he appends a second later. He -tried-. He really did.
<Pose Tracker> Roux Louka has posed.
He needs to be honest - to express what he's doing about him.
("Thank you!")
Collecting straws takes moments longer. Roux briefly weighs between Spicy BBQ, Britannian Sauce, and Sichuan Sauce, opting instead to go for a mix of all three in one dippin cup with a light swirl from one of the coffee sticks.
Roux glances upwards for a moment. Nah they're fine.
Roux collects everything and starts walking up the stairs.
'what's the point of understanding the unicorn' is about the point when she crests over the stairs, though she stops, long enough for someone behind her to say "Rude" and try to go around, because she can see passion - slumping -
Roux smiles with a sort of sad pride, entirely to herself.
Nobody got hit.
Up she comes, pushing the door open with her hip.
"Alright~! I'm glad to see you guys were cool - here you go, try one dry before you start dipping, Banagher - your burgers, Mr. Cardiac -" (Roux, as it turns out, got a Spicy Chicken Special. It has not been 'Psychofries'd.' She was going to steal Judau's. This keeps her from getting too chunky.)
As she sits down, Roux picks up her sandwich. "I think I got the gist of what Judau said... do you want to say anything to that, Banagher?"
<Pose Tracker> Banagher Links has posed.
Banagher's milkshake is utterly wiped out by Judau's attack, spilling across the table. The young man frowns, but keeps his temper. It was almost gone, anyway. Hands come up to rest on the edge of the table, flexing nervously.
"Leina said the same thing." Banagher murmurs, unsure how to work an 'I' into that sentence. After a few more moments of trying to figure it out, he just goes on. "A Miracle won't change the world. It didn't after Amuro gave up his life -- whatever that situation is now -- and it wouldn't even if I did the same thing."
Ultimate Pancake Recipe? Banagher blinks a few times, but refocuses. This is just Judau's way.
Golden eyes are wide, as Judau lays out his views. Worse the more desperate everyone gets -- Judau would know about that. Banagher frantically tries not to think about Leina's memories, not wanting to broadcast Judau's own experiences back at him. Deep breaths.
Roux is here, now. It gives Banagher a few moments to collect his thoughts -- mind racing as he tries to put words in the proper order. He quietly takes his food, eyes faraway, but does remember a soft "thank you". The food feels like a distant concept for the moment.
"A symbol." Banagher says, calmly. "I think -- Leina too -- it has to be a symbol, in the Box. Something to inspire people to stand up and make a change for themselves. I used to think I could be like Amuro and do it all myself. I could be someone so strong and so radiant, I could light up the Earthsphere the way he did, and change everything." His voice starts to get emotional, rising in volume just a bit. "But Leina's right. Not everyone saw a miracle that day, and for most people, nothing changed."
"I want -- I'm going to be!" A breath, "A symbol of hope! Me and the Unicorn both, Box or not. I know I'll make mistakes. I don't -- ever want to hurt anyone, but -- that's going to happen, if change is coming. A Box can't end war, or change the world. But -- er -- I believe people can. If they want to."
Banagher closes his eyes. "I'm going to put all I am into possibility. Creating possibility for everyone. A way forward to a better future, no matter where someone happened to be born."
"I won't lose control. Not ever again. Unicorn and I understand each other now. She was trying to protect me, but -- I'm ready to fight by her side. Even if we do something we regret, we'll do it together. Not just her, and not just me."
...the smell of food comes to him. Banagher opens his eyes, blinking a bit. "Um, thank you again, for the food..." He says, blushing. It's embarrassing to have said all that... All the better to just stuff some fries in his mouth.
<Pose Tracker> Judau Ashta has posed.
It's fine. Judau doesn't need his experience reflected back at him.
They're at the forefront of his thoughts, right now. And so many more.
Really, at the end of the day, part of him is as worried for Banagher as he is mad right now. What's he going to do when he runs across the sides of Neo-Zeon and the movements of space that take the spacenoids' sympathetic plight and twist it into something monstrous?
What's he going to do when he sees the face of the people who call the day to day shots of the Federation, even?
Judau knows how deep that rabbit hole goes; it's why he ended up in Jupiter. And even there...
Food arrives after Judau lays out his feelings, after Banagher speaks of how many people Amuro's miracle plainly missed. Another event Judau wasn't there for -- but he felt it, all the way out in Jupiter.
It was ultimately one of the reasons that drew him back here, even with all his misgivings.
"..."
Food is, at least, a good and momentary distraction. Judau's mood whips from angry to thrilled (muted trilled!) in record time and a declaration of "hell yeah!" He takes hold of his two mammoth-sized deeply unhealthy-looking burgers, dismissing Roux's on-point sass with an irritable, "Shut up, my cardiac is -huge-" that does not inspire confidence that he understands what cardiac means or more likely does not understand that a big heart is not necessarily a good thing.
Whatever. Bigger is better!
that said he - despite previous grumping - very subtly slides his bigass bin of Psychofries between himself and Roux
He is in the middle of taking the biggest, unhealthiest bite of that absolute mess of his first burger by the time that Banagher continues. Sea green eyes tilt up to peer at Banagher, frowning around that burger as he mentions Amuro, and doing it all on his own. That missed miracle. No -- someone didn't even just dismiss it.
Some people saw something worse in it; they saw opportunity.
Judau didn't have to be here to know that.
But Banagher surges into his declaration. He wants to be something more. Something inspirational. Judau swallows his burger.
The angry part of him just wants to point towards the tidal wave of history and how inevitably people go back to killing each other over a blue marble they barely need anymore. Instead, Judau closes his eyes. He sets his burger down. He lifts himself up, leans across the table, reaches out--
And whatever imminent threat that movement might herald ends in little more than a finger flicking against Banagher's forehead.
"It's gonna be more than you an' your Gundam, now. You got Leina roped up in all this, an' she's not the type to just give up in the middle of the race. An' Sayla, an' this Audrey person," whoever -that- is, "... an' whoever the hell else. If you wanna be a symbol, fine." Like he told Banagher when they first met -- it's what Banagher wants, not what people expect from him.
"Just remember all of 'em, and how happy they'd be just havin' you with them healthy and whole, symbol or not."
He's still not SUPER happy. But all the same. Judau slumps back into his seat, waving a hand through the air irritably.
"The rest... I'll believe it when I see it. I'm gonna keep an eye on both of you, an' if that makes me an asshole for not just trustin' this is the last of it, whatever, I'll be the asshole if it means makin' sure you don't end up in over your head doin' something you regret." And here, he takes a bite of his burger again, chewing with a frown. "Alright?"
<Pose Tracker> Roux Louka has posed.
Roux reaches down to collect a psychofry.
She takes a bite out of it as Banagher speaks his intention...!
Roux holds her peace as it's spoken. Then Judau as well. Judau takes moments long enough for Roux to unwrap her sandwich and bite into it and chew and swallow and even take another sip of her, undaunted, milkshake. (She eyeballs the spill on the table but decides that it may just be the problem of the staff. If they didn't want this to happen, they should have set themselves up better. They should have brought the food themselves!!)
Judau leans forwards --
newtype flick!
-- and Roux snorts. It's not really a laugh but it's also a case of 'not not a laugh,' and so the messages here may be getting decidedly mixed.
"I wanted to say something too," Roux says, "for myself."
"I think... whatever it is that you decide," and here Roux picks up another psychofry, "to do, with your Gundam, and with your ideals... you should listen to what people say. If your heart tells you they're lying, that's one thing. But if you don't accept someone's forgiveness, or at least acknowledge it, you're saying, 'I know better than you how you feel!' And maybe once in a while that's true... but you know... *not the general rule*, right?"
"In my opinion," Roux concludes.
"My counts as I," Roux tells Judau with a sudden turn of her head.
<Pose Tracker> Banagher Links has posed.
Banagher freezes in place as Judau reaches to him, a fry halfway up to his mouth. He's bracing himself. After telling Leina he'd fight back, Banagher can't just sit here and do nothing, but -- oh. It's just a flick.
"Ow." Banagher says, mostly out of surprise.
Judau is treated to another wide-eyed stare as he goes on, but at the mention of Leina and Audrey, he smiles. It's an automatic reaction to hearing the names, really. "Yeah. Leina's helped me figure so much out. I think -- things would've been so much worse at Torrington, without her. I'm not sure Sayla thinks very much of me, but Audrey... She's here to stay, too. I have people depending on me."
"I have a reason to come back alive." Banagher's eyes are soft. "I understand that now. I used to have no one, but now -- I'm connected to so many people. I'm really thankful. And I'm going to be my best self for them!"
He's been doing so well, this conversation, but as his thoughts drift to the girls... A memory echoes.
"Look at this one!" Banagher says, laughing, holding up a pair of extreme cat-eyed sunglasses in a horrible lime green. "Audrey, it's just your color!"
Two young women laugh with him. Leina in her wheelchair, and another young woman. With warm blonde hair and piercing green eyes, she cuts a pretty unmistakable figure, even in Banagher's memory. Leina and Banagher are already wearing ridiculous-looking sunglasses, and as the third girl -- Audrey? -- puts hers on, they all squish in close together. Banagher raises his phone and snaps some pictures, the three teens making goofy faces.
Roux's voice brings Banagher back to reality, and he shakes his head, refocusing on her. "I think you're right. I learned so much from my time with the Sleeves... I need to keep doing that, to learn more about other people and the way they live."
Eyes light up as Judau waves a hand through the air. It feels like acceptance. "Alright! Um -- yeah! Please keep watching over us!" Banagher practically glows with relief. "Thank you, Judau. I won't let you down."
Not again.
<Pose Tracker> Judau Ashta has posed.
If it had been the day of, there's no doubt Judau would have come in swinging. Even Roux is not mediator enough.
But time heals -- not all wounds, but at least provides distance to numb them.
This isn't to say that punching isn't still a possibility in the future. But for now -- Banagher Links is safe from being known colony-wide for getting in a fist fight in the sanctity of McDaniels.
Roux has her own piece to say, and Judau's attention turns her way. There's a look of fond appreciation there -- as usual, Roux is much better at putting words to feelings without an excess of swearing and/or yelling. It echoes his own sentiments, if slightly less angry.
Not that he's... good at listening to what people say...
Case in point: Judau Ashta opens his mouth to critique Roux Louka for not following her own rules despite the fact that he's long since abandoned it during his rant.
'My counts as I,' she preempts.
Judau, mouth open, pauses. Blinks. Raises a finger. Pauses again. Blinks. Frowns.
"Yeah, I know."
...
"Shut up."
He's mathing this out in his head when memories hit him. Newtype powers are powers of awareness; empathy. What he sees are impressions... but impressions paint a picture all their own. Leina and Banagher, together. And a third girl, who...
... who...
...
... why is the impression of her so familiar to him...?
It's almost like... if he reached out...
You raise my hopes, only to betray them! You're no different from the others!
"--Huh?"
Banagher is talking to him. His eyes are alight. He's saying -- thanks?
Judau Ashta blinks.
"--Yeah, don't thank me," he says, after a moment. "I still might hafta kick your ass. I don't care if Leina'll kick mine after."
She will. He knows it. But he's -committed-.
Judau lifts his burger up to his mouth again. And just before he takes his next, unholy-large bite, he pauses.
"... Just... keep your head above the water." No matter what happens.