2022-07-23: The 'Self' We've Found

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<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.

Rena, Eight, and Arriety are spending time together... which is not really /different/ than the times they did it before.

Except, of course, that it's been awhile since it was just the three of them.

And something changed since then.

Now, they are in the apartment assigned to Rena Lancaster when she is at Londenion; it's technically home but she isn't here all that much. There is a table -- there is a nice dinner, of takeout brought in from a nearby Neo-Chinese place -- and there are seats and drinks.

Rena is in a chair. She sits there, faintly flushed; she might be the one feeling a little awkward.

"...so..."

She isn't sputtering. Except mentally, which they can both sense.

<Pose Tracker> Arriety Hearn has posed.

Arriety's tucked up next to Rena and Eight in their apartment, which... at this point is probably just all in the same block, isn't it? It's still nice to crash out at someone else's place.

She hasn't really picked at the takeout, but she's having a drink. She glances over towards Rena for a moment, tilting her head. "Hmm..?"

<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.

Eight theoretically has one of these apartments. Theoretically. She's not entirely sure where it is. It's fine. But there is a table, there are seats, there are drinks, and while Rena is faintly flushed...

"Mm! This is pretty good!" Eight declares, and picks up a soda to wash some food down. She is not sputtering or stammering or ahving any trouble in the least!

In fact she's outright cheerful at the moment, especially when she looks over at Arriety, smiles, looks over at Rena and then... winks.

"You're cute when you're awkward, you know."

<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.

Rena sputters when Eight winks. Oh, she was already close to it when Arriety asked, with that sidelong glance at her. Both of them -- in their own ways -- seem so at peace with things, while Rena sits there getting more and more flustered.

"O-Octo!" she whines.

Then, she puts her face in her hands.

"W-We're all dating each other, now!" she says. "Th-this could be scandalous! Or... or it's--shouldn't we talk about it, or--"

She whines. "Oh, God, I'm the only who's awkward about it. I'm a disaster."

<Pose Tracker> Arriety Hearn has posed.

Arriety blinks a few times, before smiling as Eight digs in particularly swift to the core -- and smiles in turn and says, "... hmm ... is it?" She bobs her head and taps her chin. "I didn't know... you're worried," as she scoots a bit closer to Eight and rests her head on her shoulder.

"Hmm... I have to agree, though, Rena is cute when she's awkward."

<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.

Eight laughs cheerfully at Rena's whining, tilting her head a little to 'answer' Arriety's resting on her shoulder, setting down her drink to put an arm around her instead. "Scandalous! That's a fun word," she says. "What do you think, Ah-ri? Is it scandalous?"

She relents after a little moment though. "We should totally talk," she agrees then, "I just wanted to tease you a little first."

"You're our disaster, right? Our very cute disaster."

"It's OK to be a little awkward. What's on your mind?"

<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.

"Y-You can't team up!"

Rena whines it. Of course, they absolutely can team up -- they /have/ teamed up in the past. This is not a fair complaint at all. She hangs her head, the red streak in her hair bobbing not unlike a comet. Her eyes blink once.

"I... guess..." She hesitates. "...we're all seeing each other. A-Aren't either of you worried about... about getting jealous, about if we kind of favor one over the other? How we'll balance it? A-All of those things?"


<Pose Tracker> Arriety Hearn has posed.

Arriety pauses and has to point out: "Well, Eight has Lavhi too, as far as balancing thing goes," because there are moments where she's an absolute devil when it comes to these things. She looks to Eight, though, and considers it for a moment.

"Hmm. Not scandalous," she decides in the end. "I guess I never really cared what other people thought, especially not now. And being jealous, hmm..."

She rubs her chin. "... I guess I just trust you two enough, given how long we've been together."

<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.

"We can!" Eight answers brightly. "We are!"

But... hmmm. Eight nods to Arriety because she has a valid point! "I do! But that doesn't mean I can't spend time with just you two, obviously." But balancing, favoring...

"Not scandalous," she agrees. "I guess some people might think it's weird," she admits, "But I don't really care about that either. I'm not exactly looking at the steady career get married and make Admiral by 30, you know? We're already a little weird for being where we are, what we are, and who we are."

She smiles Arriety's way without moving away from her. "I trust you, too. But, if you are worried about it..."

"I think we need and want different things from one another, and that's OK? And if anybody feels neglected she can just say so." A pause. "I'm not really worried that much about getting jealous... Not with you two, anyway. We've all been together so long that it's easy to just be 'us'." Jealousy on her part for Lavhi might be another matter, but that's a different matter!

"Besides," she says. "...I'll be busy with work a lot, so I don't mind if you two get to spend more time together while I am."

<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.

"Th-that's true..."

And Rena has wondered and worried about Lahvi, but it's different! There is a different bond there! She taps a finger against her cheek, then her shoulders slump after a moment. "...well, yeah, none of us are exactly... the career soldier type," Rena says. "I'm..."

She frowns for a moment. "...I trust both of you, of course," she admits. "But I... um. Do you... are we dating each other, or is it we're all three of us together, or..."

Rena trails off. "...I guess I'm not sure what I'm asking."

<Pose Tracker> Arriety Hearn has posed.

Arriety hmmms and immediately points out: "We're all married."

Where's all this cheek coming from?!?! Arriety laughs again, sipping her drink... oh, that's where it's coming from, huh. She smiles just a bit wider as she says, "Life was never typical for me, and trying hard to fit myself into what people who are typical says it should be only makes me suffer."

She quietly nods and says, "Like... we've talked about how I don't really feel much on the physical bit about being close... and that's okay, because you have Eight, Rena, and vice versa. And I get different needs and wants, like Eight says."

She does grin to Eight to say, "I'm going to start conspiring with the XO to get you more time off, you know."

<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.

"Oh! That settles it then," Eight laughs with Arriety. But then she says, "...Hmmm." A pause. "I think that's pretty insightful, about 'fitting in', Ah-ri. And like you say, it's fine--the physical side, I've got Rena and Lavhi, and honestly I feel really... covered, there." Then a laugh back, "Oh no! Conspiring to get me time off! I guess I could live with that. Rezza'd probably go with it too..."

But she says, "But, I guess the way I see it is; we're all together, we're all dating, and then separately I'm seeing Lavhi. If you ever wanted to add somebody like that I'd be OK with it, though I'd want to talk about it."

"And in the meantime, we can... Just sort of be our own thing. I don't think I have a good model for what we look like. ...I guess... one day, I want to have a nice, big house, and have both of you and Lavhi in it, and..."

She flushes a little, actually embarrassed at sharing that for a moment. "Well, the ship is kind of like that for now. Anyway I just..." She is drinking soda, rather than Drinks, naturally. "...I love you both, and I don't think even if I were just with one person my life would look all that normal. So I'm OK seeing how it all goes."

<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.

"M-Married!?"

Rena whines, her hands covering her face. She shakes her head quickly, and then she looks down. Her brow furrows for a moment. "I-I think you're right," she says. "We do cover some of the things we need from other angles..."

She trails off for a moment. "I-I'm glad you think so," she says. "I love you both. And, um, I'm not sure I can think about a house yet. But..."

She nods. "Th-that's true of me, too. I don't mind if there's others." A beat. "Well, okay, I might get jealous, but... I kind of like being jealous..."

<Pose Tracker> Arriety Hearn has posed.

"I've had a lot of time to think about it..." Arriety answers Eight, on the topic of not feeling like she has to fit in. She's had since childhood, after all. She does grin, though. "Right? Your crew're thinking of the best for you too. I'd know, since I've been spending more time with them."

She sips her drink, then leans in contently. "Hmm... a big house... that might be nice. I still haven't really thought about what I wanna do... like..."

A pause. "I think I'm more interested in travelling right now than settling down... and... I still have to figure out what I want to study. I guess that doesn't exactly conflict with a house, though."

She looks to Rena with a smile. "Hmm... you like being jealous...?"

<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.

"Between the three of you I don't think I have the /energy/ for another partner," Eight says with a laugh, rubbing at the back of her neck with her hand. "You know me, I used to just kind of see whoever I felt like, but... I'm not so much feeling that way anymore." She looks to Arriety, and smiles. "Yeah. I have to remember that. Sometimes I forget, I feel like I have to do it all myself, but... that's the whole point of having a crew, so we can all counton each other!"

"Don't worry, I'm not planning to settle down and stuff anytime /soon/. I mean, I kind of... I kind of--I really want a big family. Like I didn't get to have when I was really young. But not yet. I've gt way too much to do to settle down now."

"I think traveling sounds good. I want to do a lot of traveling, too. The trick with a house is we'd have to decide where to live, and I'm not really ready for /that/ yet."

Then Eight grins at Rena. "If you want to be jealous, I can arrange that." A beat, "I might get jealous too," she admits after that though. "But I'm willing to work it out for you."

<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.

"I... don't know. I want to make the Federation better. I want to make a difference. I wish I knew what that looked like," Rena says. She looks down for a moment, her brow furrowing. "...I know it's a lot to deal with. Having... um. A girlfriend that wants to make the world better. You're sharing me with a lot."

She looks to the side for a second; Rena seems to think about this for a moment, before she looks at Arriety.

She flushes. "A-A little. Like how it's kind of... fun to be embarrassed," she admits. She couldn't normally say this -- but they can both feel the way she feels.

She looks back at Eight, then Arriety, and she nods. "Traveling sounds nice. And... maybe a family, some day," she says. She hesitates for a moment, then she flushes. "O-Octo!"

Her shoulders slump. Then, she looks up. "...I'll, um, talk to you if there's ever someone else I'd want to be with, too," she adds.

<Pose Tracker> Arriety Hearn has posed.

Arriety laughs a little at Eight's comment on how they're all the energy she can muster as partners. "... mmm. Yeah, that's right. It's like how we used to do it as kids, counting on each other... it's not like it's changed because we've grown up now."

Eight wants a really big family... she quietly nods. Then Rena shares her dream about making the Federation better.

"Isn't the first step... mm, like... getting to know Earth?" Arriety ventures. "That's what I've always thought. As Spacenoids, we're so used to thinking of Earth being represented by this Federation that... that can't possibly represent them all."

She tilts her head. "I want to get to know Earth better too. I still want to make that trip to Korea."

She laughs as Eight teases Rena about jealousy, though. "Like... being a bit possessive if someone's flirting with me? I think I don't mind that either." A hum.

"... I kinda... have a bit of an idea about where I wanna go myself."

<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.

"The way you want to make things better is one of the things I love about you," Eight tells Rena. "And I want to, too! ...That's smart, to think of it that way. We're sharing you with your ideals, too..."

"...That's true, though!" Like when they were younger. ...Though some things are different, sure. But the idea...?

"Yeah... I guess if we want Earth to understand Spacenoids, we need to understand Earth, too. So it can go both ways." She nods to Arriety. "I want to hear all about it, and go with you if I can." The trip.

"That's definitely fun," Eight says of possessiveness. "Does that mean I should keep flirting with other people just to make Rena jealous? Hmmm..."

She smiles at Rena, first. "Cool. Just let me know. Him, her... I want to know the people in your life, because they're part of my life, too."

She looks at Arriety after that. "Do you? Tell us!"

<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.

"Yeah... kinda like when we were younger. Different, too," Rena says, nodding at Eight. Agreeing with that thought she had. She looks back at Arriety, then she nods, and she looks down for a moment. "We should know more about Earth. And..."

She sighs. "...I don't know. It's hard to say how to make things better. But...I'm glad you believe in me," she says.

Then she sputters. "N-No! I mean... that's not what I meant. Just... it's not bad if I sometimes get jealous." She shakes her head, then, before her eyes briefly settle on Arriety.

"You do?" she asks.


<Pose Tracker> Arriety Hearn has posed.

"I think... there's no harm in wanting to make things better," Arriety quietly says. "Even if the odds are completely stacked against us... if we don't dare to hope and dream for a better world, then that's every shot we never took. I don't want... the world to keep being run by the kind of adults I hate."

A pause. She chuckles at Eight and hums in turn. "It's always fun to tease Rena a bit..." But not too much.

On her idea, though...

"Well, I've met a number of Super AI now... I went to Orbit Base and met their new Super-AIs, and I went to the Brave Police HQ too and met Regina Argine and Duke Fire. And I kinda..."

A pause. "I kinda feel like I can help Minae help them. And give something back when Minae's helped me through my childhood. I'm... thinking about maybe studying counseling for AI, if such a thing exists... and if it doesn't, I kinda wanna ensure it exists."

<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.

"If it were easy," Eight says, "Someone would've already done it. I do." Believe, that is. But she looks to Arriety, and nods. "Yeah. I feel that way, too."

Eight laughs a little. "Don't worry, I don't really plan to do anything like that. We'll just see if there's some fun chances here and there, without looking too hard."

But Arriety... "Oh, wow. That's a great idea! I think you could do really well at it, too. ...Minae's given us all a lot. And AI are so misunderstood..."

"I think that's really nice."

<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.

"Yeah," Rena says, with a nod of her head. She looks down at the table for a moment, before she takes a sip of her drink. "I guess we'll see what we can do. I'm still not sure if I can really make a difference."

She shakes her head, and then she looks up -- and smiles. "I'll hold you to that, Octo," she says.

She looks at Arriety and blinks -- then she tilts her head to the side. It's not quite the answer she expected. But it makes sense, she thinks.

"That's a good idea," she says. "Someone should be there for them."

<Pose Tracker> Arriety Hearn has posed.

"Just... remember that there's many, many, many levels of making a difference between 'doing nothing' and 'changing all of the Federation'," Arriety advises Rena. "It's easy to get trapped in thinking if you haven't revolutionised the world overnight, you aren't making a difference..."

A pause. She nods towards Eight and Rena. "... I don't even know how to begin with mine. Maybe I'll get in contact with the people at GGG and the Brave Police... maybe that's the way."

<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.

"You can definitely make a difference," Eight says, and there's a sense in the moment of how sure she is of what Arriety says. "...I think a big difference... but we'll have to go a step at a time. And those steps matter, too."

It isn't something Eight woul'dve expected either, but...

"You can't counsel AIs without AIs. It makes sense to me!"

"And they'd be the experts on themselves, right?"

<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.

"That's true... small steps," Rena says, with a sigh. She looks down for a moment. "But I want to find a way to make a big difference, too." There's a glance at Eight, then; they talked about this before, though as much as Londo Bell officers as romantic partners. "But... one thing at a time."

She sighs, once.

Then, she tilts her head to the side. "I know Guy Shishioh... not that well, but--ah. He and the Lieutenant were friends. So... I could make an introduction, if it would help, Ah-ri."

<Pose Tracker> Arriety Hearn has posed.

A big difference... "Just... this once, promise me you won't overdo it," Arriety murmurs to Rena. "Even just being on this ship, I've seen people... who felt desperate to make a big difference, and they've paid for it. And many others too... they've lost their life. I'm not saying don't do it, just..."

A pause. "Don't... let it end up controlling you either."

She smiles to Eight and says, "I think... AIs end up learning a lot from humans. That much, I'm certain about. So I think a human that's used to being around AI and can guide them through their earliest days..."

She scraatches her cheek. "I almost sound like I'm going to be their mom or something..."

Rena mentions Guy, and she perks up. "I actually met him once, when Minae took me to Orbit Base... he seems really nice. I'd mentioned you too."

<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.

"I know," Eight says. They did talk about it before; the blonde remembers it, and... "Mm. I know you're going to do a lot, and put your all into it. But let us support you, OK? You can make a big difference, but you don't have to do it alone." She looks to Arriety for a moment, quiet, at the matter of those who have paid the price on this ship alone. She knows...

Eight remembers all the letters she's had to write for crewmembers who didn't make it.

But she breathes in, and doesn't focus on that. Instead, "Yeah... I think leaning on that connection might be good!" A smile at Arriety. "I think it's nice. You really care. That shows through!"

"I got to meet him once, too; I visited their base, looking for more information on a problem we were looking at."

<Pose Tracker> Rena Lancaster has posed.

"I... I'll be careful, Ah-ri," Rena says, after a moment. She looks down at the table for a moment, her brow furrowing for a second, and then she looks up at Eight. She nods at her. No doing it on her own. Those are both tall orders, she thinks. But she owes it to them to try.

"I will," she says.

She blinks -- then she nods her head. "That's good," she says. "He's very nice. I think he'd help. They seem to care about... I'd say AI's, but I think they care about everything. But AI's, for sure."

She smiles, after a moment's thought. "I guess we've all got something we're trying to do, huh?"

<Pose Tracker> Arriety Hearn has posed.

Arriety quietly nods at Rena, gently. She doesn't know if she's ending up discouraging Rena, and it's having a different effect than she'd like, but... but... she'll have to trust in Eight's words too.

"... I can't say who, but I've met a runaway AI who was really afraid of being reformatted. That's... that's part of what I want to help avoid. I haven't forgotten that moment at all. Being erased just because you don't fit what someone else wanted you to be..."

She huffs for a moment. "... yeah. It's nice, sharing our dreams like this... I'll try my hardest to help both of you too."

<Pose Tracker> Eight York has posed.

"They do, yeah," Eight agrees about GGG. And then she nods to Arriety. "...I feel like I can understand that," Eight says. "I used to worry... that somehow they'd catch up to me, and everything I'd worked to make for myself would just disappear, and I'd be back there again. I guess I still do, on bad nights, sometimes. So... I want to tell that AI that the 'self' they've found is important and valuable, too."

She smiles after that. "Yeah. I'm happy we can share that. ...And also..."

Pause. Look left, look right. "Hey, you gonna eat that?" Eight is hungry!

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