2022-05-13: Care
- Log: Care
- Cast: Anti, Rikka Takarada
- Where: Kamesan Park/Junk Shop Aya (Tsutsujidai)
- Date: 2022-05-13 (0096)
- Summary: Rikka feeds Anti, and cleans him up. Anti learns that it's okay to enter a house when he's invited, and that no one is useless. But... do those lessons really make sense, in his life? (Content warning: strong references to familial abuse.)
<Pose Tracker> Anti has posed.
Sparse traffic rolls under a bright blue summer sky, clouds all broken up by spines and tails. A dozen-dozen cables sling across the wide street, lights to direct the cars below.
Atop a sign turned away stands a boy, slight and small. He has tucked his scarf away; he looms in his faux-uniform, navy blue all trimmed with magenta like flames from some forgotten fire.
'He's Gridman. I don't know how exactly he does it, but he turns into Gridman.'
The failure has baked against his head like old yogurt, flaking in his hair. His nostrils flare against a smell even he notices; a reminder.
"Yuta Hibiki... where could he be?"
He glares down at the rolling streets with roiling intensity, high enough that if he cared, he could look to the side and see the apartments rising high...
... and then...
... his stomach growls.
...---...
*rustle* *rummage* *rustle*
With subtitles just like that, there's a white-haired boy in Kamesan Park, half-buried in the trash can. The waterfront is gorgeous, all lined with manicured trees and a generous walkway -- and yet it's marred by a middle-schooler, arm all the way into the trash, staring intently through the slot as he tries to dig out something good. His other hand grasps the edge of the bin, as if to stop him from falling all the way inside.
A sign on the fence, all red and black kanji with a simple crossed-out graphic, reads:
Kamesan Park management.'
<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.
After abandoning Hass to the grim fate of dealing with her unfinished schoolwork alone, Rikka had intended it to be a lazy day around the house... but, she found she was still feeling a little restless from recent events, the events of the concert still lodged in her mind. So, she decided to do a little walking around to burn off some of that nervous energy.
After a bout of shopping, listening to some music samples, and picking up something for a friend that caught her eye at Nova, Rikka finds herself cutting through the park... when she finds herself witness to a familiar sight.
A boy, rummaging through the trash. Rikka pauses in her tracks, watching him for a moment. ...It's the same boy, isn't it? It doesn't look like his situation has improved any. After a moment of consideration she diverts from her path to approach him.
"Hey... remember me?" She greets - announces herself, more like, so as not to startle him while he's distracted. "We met before, when it was raining."
It gives her a moment to look him over and see how he's doing.
<Pose Tracker> Anti has posed.
Fish bones... no. They're technically food, but the only things left are scales and spikiness.
Banana peel... no. Those things are like eating rubber.
Apple core... no. Akane told him not to eat those.
Empty juice box... no. Cardboard isn't food.
Rustle, rustle, rummage, reaaach...
That's when he hears someone announce herself. He blinks, and turns his head, looking sidelong up at her with those sunset-coloured eyes. He's suspicious, but not at all ashamed.
He stops moving, as he looks up at her. That girl... yes, he remembers her. The umbrella girl. He still doesn't understand -- why she did something like that. For no reason, without even knowing him...
He's quiet, a moment more. The dried yogurt in his hair is a pertinent reminder that it's none of her business. He should ignore her, Anti supposes.
Except...
That was kindness, wasn't it?
What she did was 'being kind'.
He lifts his head, and turns to her, with a light frown. "Do you need something?" He asks, direct, gruff; not quite a demand, but not entirely a friendly question, either.
It's... an uncomfortable assertion, this acknowledgement that other people need things -- that they have needs. He told Sayla that she and Nidaime should leave them alone... but he doesn't feel entirely good about that.
It doesn't look like he's putting himself out there, though.
It just looks like he's a boy digging through trash.
Digging through trash, because --
Once again, Anti's stomach growls.
<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.
The dried yogurt in his hair... Rikka frowns a little as she notices that, but it's not a frown directed at him. She makes a mental note to ask about that... but it feels rude to lead with it, so she doesn't yet.
He looks to her, and asks a direct question. ...It puts her a bit off balance, she wasn't really expecting that kind of response.
"U-uh, no, but..." She starts. As she tries to figure out how to address the situation, a sound fills the air that simplifies things somewhat. A growling stomach, coming from a boy rumbling through the trash...
"...Do you want some food?" She offers. She steps aside over to a nearby bench, where she sets down her shopping, unslings her backpack, begins to rummage through it before setting out two items - a special dog, fresh and still in its wrapper(which is quickly unsealed for him) and a drink box. She steps away from the bench, then - and indication that they're intended for him.
<Pose Tracker> Anti has posed.
The sign is right there. The camera focuses on it for a long, deliberate moment. Don't feed stray cats inside the park...
Anti grasps the edge of the bin, and uses it to help straighten himself up, unfolding from where he's crouched beside it. He sits down beside the special dog, and picks it up in a tight grip, bringing it up to his face at speed.
CHOMP. There is something violent about the way Anti devours his special dog, held close to his face, all intensity and fire and drive. He eats messily; maybe it's possible to imagine him getting so much food in his hair, with habits like that.
Except... those dried flakes are on the top of his head, not...
He doesn't say anything about that.
He doesn't thank her, either.
<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.
The sign is right there. But it can't stop Rikka, because she can't read. (...it, from all the way over here. It's, like, several feet away. That's asking way too much.)
She watches as Anti tears into the special dog. Does he usually eat that violently? Or is he just afraid she'll rescind the offer if he isn't quick enough...? It's easy to imagine how he could make a mess, eating like that, but...
"...Are you a middle-schooler?" Rikka asks, after a moment. She gives him a moment to process that question before continuing. "My name's Rikka. What's yours?"
<Pose Tracker> Anti has posed.
Anti doesn't understand Rikka's first question, and so he doesn't even acknowledge it. He knows of school, certainly; he is aware, in vaguest terms, that it is a place where the youth of Tsutsujidai congregate. But being in the middle of school is a nonsense statement, because they're not in school, they're in the park.
He's too busy eating to belabour questions which don't make sense. NOMPH nomph nomph, he shoves his face into the packaging, as he gets at the last of it. A piece of hot dog rolls into the plastic, away from his grasping teeth; Anti knows better than to eat plastic, these days.
(He's since also learned not to drink hand sanitiser. Apparently, that's not food.)
Anti has a solution to this problem, though: he reaches in with his fingers, to pluck up the last bit of hot dog, and pop it into his mouth. Chew, chew, chew.
So, he thinks, as he eats. She's 'Rikka'...
His head tilts up, as he swallows. He looks out over the water, across to the trees and bushes where he hides away. He... knows Rikka is a youth of Tsutsujidai, too. He knows, because he saw her, when that group of them went to the mountains together. She's... not an outsider.
... it's still none of her business. But... Akane isn't here, now. Would it cause so much damage if he gave this girl that, after she was -- 'kind'?
"Anti." The word comes a beat too late, as if it almost wasn't coming at all.
<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.
He doesn't answer Rikka's first question. Is it because he doesn't want to answer, or just because he isn't? Maybe he's home-schooled... but then again, he's wearing that uniform...
But, he does give a name, at least, even if it almost seemed like he wasn't going to.
"Anti, huh..." Rikka replies consideringly. She mulls that over, mulls him over as she reachs into her bag again drawing out... another special dog!
She doesn't usually eat them, but she was hungry. She's found a better use for them now, at least. She undoes the wrapper and holds the special dog out to him.
"Chow down!" She says, offering him an encouraging smile.
<Pose Tracker> Anti has posed.
Anti turns, by fractions, towards Rikka as she moves. He looks down to what her hands are doing. His gaze locks on the special dog for a moment, before it darts back up to Rikka. Up, down. Up, down. Unwrapped...
She offers it to him, and he snatches it up, devouring it with that self-same ferocity he showed the first bun. GNOMPH, nomph, nomph. If this is chowing, he is, in fact, down.
Anti hunches over his special dog, all but forcing it into his mouth. He's not thinking about saving food for later, right now; he hasn't eaten for far too long. He's been busy.
He's been searching.
He's...
Well, it's a wonder his mark didn't smell him coming a mile away. The closest thing to a bath Anti has ever had is being caught out in the rain -- and it's been horribly hot out, instead. The smell of strawberry and coconut yogurt after a day in the sun is something more akin to a garbage heap. This is leaving aside, in fact, all the actual heaps of garbage Anti regularly scrounges through.
He DEFINITELY didn't wash his hands before grabbing that special dog.
<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.
Those prompting looks... it's a good thing Rikka was planning on giving it to him anyway. Otherwise, the guilt would have been overpowering.
...There's something else that's overpowering too. Rikka leans in for a moment, and makes a Face.
...Yeah. Yeah, he stinks.
She doesn't know of any kinder way to put it, so she just asks flat out,
"...When did you last take a bath?" She asks.
<Pose Tracker> Anti has posed.
Anti gets caught in the middle of a mouthful, when Rikka asks him that question. Taking a... that's a possessive question, so...
He lifts his head, crumbs scattering from his maw to his lap. "A bath?" He asks, except his mouth is still full, so it sounds more like: 'Ah bahff?'
Chew, chew. Swallow. He blinks, once.
"What's that?" His forthright tone at least isn't so muffled, now his mouth is more-or-less clear. (There's some lettuce, stuck in his teeth. He must not FLOSS, either. God help him, except, you know, how she clearly hasn't.)
<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.
...He doesn't know?
"You know... bathing?" She replies. But from his response... No, he clearly doesn't.
"Seriously...?" She mutters, mostly to herself. ...The last thing she expected to have to do today was explain what 'bathing' is. If he doesn't even know what bathing is... that's pretty bad, right? What kind of home life does he have?
...Does he even have a home life? Or a home, for that matter? With that thought she softens a little, taking a moment to massage her forehead.
"Okay, uh... it's what it's called when you use a lot of water, and usually soap, to clean yourself off..." Rikka explains. "It's healthy! And makes you smell nice."
She pauses, thinking for a moment. If he doesn't know what bathing is, he probably doesn't have access to one, so...
"You can use the bath at my place, if you want." She offers.
<Pose Tracker> Anti has posed.
Anti frowns, deeply, as he takes this information in. The gears turn, slowly, in his mind. Finally, he asks...
"Soap?"
Oh no.
He looks -- a little bothered, though, when he thinks about Rikka's place. He looks away, back towards the river, but he can't escape that nagging feeling. An offer like that... for some reason, his heart clenches.
He looks back to Rikka; he looks away, again.
"I'm not allowed inside." He explains that much, finally -- why he's so hesitant and conflicted, in the face of her offer.
Does he think that edict applies to all houses..?
<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.
Soap... Yeah, that's on her, she should've known he wouldn't have known what that is, either.
"It helps with the cleaning." Rikka explains. She frowns, though, as he looks bothered by the offer. Does he just not want to do it, or... no, there's a reason.
He's not allowed outside. That's... a little concerning.
"Who told you that...?" She asks, then shakes her head. ...Nevermind. Maybe she shouldn't bark up that tree, yet. "...It's okay if you don't want to tell me."
"But... I'm inviting you in, so it should be alright, right?" She offers. "Mom might wonder what's going on, but she'd be okay with it once I explained..."
...Actually, come to think about it, it'd probably be better if she didn't find out. If her mom knew what was going on with him, she'd probably want Answers and that might be a little overwhelming... She decides that she should probably avoid letting her find out for now.
<Pose Tracker> Anti has posed.
Rikka asks who told him that, and Anti frowns, glancing down at himself.
(At his pocket. At his phone. But never mind that.)
"..." He says, deliberately, lips pressed tightly together. He almost looks a little ill, at the idea of speaking, brow drawn and nostrils pinched.
When people find out about Anti and Akane... it feels bad. His chest gets tight, and his throat closes up, and his muscles get very, very stiff; and he supposes that must be a bad feeling.
It's one which only lasts long enough for Rikka to shake her head, at least; Anti relaxes, a little, when she says it's okay if he doesn't want to tell her. "Mm," he hums vague assent.
He's still confused, though, when he looks up to her again. "If I'm invited... it's all right," he repeats, slowly, as if to check and double-check. He can go inside if he's invited. It's okay if he's invited.
Anti nods, and stands, which might be the closest thing to agreement she'll get.
<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.
The way he frowns, the way he almost looks ill... That's definitely a bad sign. It's something Rikka will want to deal with eventually, but she doesn't want to put too much pressure on him at once. He gives a 'mm', and Rikka nods.
And then, he repeats her invitation. She doesn't interrupt him - she waits to see how he react to it... and eventually, he nods and stands. Rikka offers him a smile.
"Great. I'll lead the way - it isn't too far from here." She says. "The shop's probably still open, so we'll need to go in through the back..."
With that said, she'll lead him back home, if he'll follow - back to Junk Shop Aya.
<Pose Tracker> Anti has posed.
Anti nods, stern, and follows along behind Rikka. It's a pace which slows, a little, as he realises he's moving back towards Akane's house -- doubt, in his footsteps. But Rikka said he was invited, so it must be... a coincidence, he decides, with difficulty.
He catches up. By the time they get to the junk shop, he's following closely behind Rikka, following her encouragement to get back behind the storefront.
It's not so unfamiliar, he thinks. Going behind shops is the best way to find the bins where they throw things out. But he never paid any attention to this store, because it never seemed to throw out anything he'd want.
(Anti doesn't quite realise it's a junk store, so it's where things which are thrown out end up.)
<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.
It may be fortunate that Rikka doesn't put two-and-two together as to where exactly Anti's pace begins to slow - and why. Instead she pauses at the corner of the alleyway leaning to the back of the Junk Shop, gesturing him over.
"This way, stay close." She urges him with a whisper.
Meanwhile, a lanky fellow with a set of swords and bags under his eyes observes them, partially concealed behind a nearby telephone pole. How long had Samurai Calibur been following them? ...Probably for a while. It's rare that any of the Gridman Alliance stray far without someone watching over them for safety. He doesn't follow them behind the store itself, however.
Around back, in front of the door leading into the section of the store the Takarada family uses for their house, Rikka pauses, turning to Anti.
"...Hey, so, I know what I said before, but if my mom sees you she's probably going to ask a lot of questions..." Rikka explains. "It'll be a disaster, so keep quiet, okay?"
She goes to open the door... except it opens on its own suddenly causing Rikka to stumble back, trying to conceal Anti behind herself in a brief panic.
...Orie Takarada, who was behind the door with a set of bags nearby, just gives her a confused look.
"...Something wrong?" She asks. Rikka forces a smile.
...She had expected her mom to be home. She hadn't expected her to be immediately on the way out the door. Quick, she needs an excuse...
"It's just, uh... I'm home!" She says. ...Rikka, internally, kicks herself. Orie continues to look confused.
"And early, too." She points out. Rikka manages an awkward chuckle.
"Outside is... way too hot." Rikka says, then pauses. "...Are you going somewhere?"
With an 'mm-hm', Orie leans down, picking up the bags and hefting them over a shoulder.
"Your brother's cram school. He said that he forgot something." Orie explains. That... makes sense. And it's convenient, too. But...
"So... what about the shop, then?" Rikka asks. It'd be a problem if her mom needed her to cover for her in a situation like this... but, thankfully, that's not the case.
"Oh, don't worry. The handsome boy's watching things." Orie explains nonchalantly.
In another medium, this is where we would cut briefly to Vit. For now, however, we'll just have to assume he's probably doing a good job of handling things. ...Probably.
"...We're so fortunate that he's here." Rikka replies. ...She'll have to really thank him later, for getting her out of this jam.
"Well, I better get going..." Orie says, and starts to leave.
"See you later!" Rikka calls after her... and then, once the coast is clear, breathes a sigh of relief.
"That was a close one..." She says, and looks back to Anti. "Looks like the coast is clear now. Let's go!"
If he's still agreeable to it, she'll lead him to the house, to the laundry room and the bathroom beyond it.
"Here it is. Do you, uh... know how to use it?" She asks, and then pauses. "...Probably not, huh. Would you like some help?"
<Pose Tracker> Anti has posed.
Anti... completely fails to notice the very intense man staring very intently, because he's focused on Rikka, right now.
His brow knits in concern, as Rikka explains that her mother would have questions, and it would be a disaster. Questions, Anti thinks, do often lead to disaster. "Mm," he agrees, stoic, and stays close behind her.
It's a testament to his balance as a kaiju, perhaps, that he doesn't immediately slam into her back when she stumbles back. He stays behind her, silently, as he listens to the exchange between Rikka and her carefree mother.
It's... educational. Her mother is clearly aware of her unusual movements, Anti thinks -- wonders how she didn't see him, leaning down like that -- but she's so still so casual about them. That sort of untroubled manner isn't unfamiliar to him, but there's something about the way Orie just... accepts Rikka's explanations, accepts the help of whoever is supposed to be that handsome, accepts responsibility for helping her brother...
She isn't... asking for anything.
She isn't asking for... anything.
... it troubles him, but he says nothing about it, as he follows Rikka inside.
"Mm," he grunts, nodding agreement again as he looks from the bathroom back to Rikka. Discussions while cleaning up will reveal some disturbing things:
- Anti doesn't recognise why school is relevant to him in the slightest.
- Anti is suspiciously silent about how complicated his situation really is.
- Anti is characteristically reluctant to discuss what it is he does,
- and when he finally admits that he's searching for a person and has no idea where they are, his characteristically low tones betray him, because the name he was about to give is drowned out by rinsing water.
Thanks to the magic of washers and dryers, his uniform is even clean, by the time he's learned how bathtime works -- which takes a while, because, has this kid ever had a bath? (No. He hasn't.) Being technical, he probably could have just re-instanced himself, but... well, he doesn't much think about things like that. Why would he? He's a kaiju; he acts.
And now he's a clean kaiju. With a clean uniform! It's a miracle!
He stands straight, and his gaze finds the mirror. It's not the first reflective surface he's seen, certainly; storefront windows reflect quite well in the rain, and so do aluminium cans. But, this is the first time... he's looked into a proper mirror.
He frowns, and finds his reflection frowns, too.
Look at literally anything for once...
"... useless brat," he mutters, looking straight at himself.
<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.
He doesn't know about school, he's quiet about his situation, and he's reluctant to discuss what he does, but he's looking for a person. This is all pretty troubling. Rikka didn't think anything like this could happen in Tsutsujidai, and she certainly didn't think she'd be the one to stumble across it.
Well, at least he's all clean and dry, now. She can take some pride in that, at least.
"Alright, looks like we're all done. How do you feel?" She asks, stepping up behind him... when she catches himself staring in the mirror like that. 'Useless brat'... A frown crosses Rikka's face.
"...Hey. I don't know who told you that, but you're not useless, okay?" Rikka replies. Her tone is stern, but gentle. She's not angry - or if she is, it isn't directed at him. "No one is."
<Pose Tracker> Anti has posed.
No one looks. No one sees. No one listens. No one hears. It doesn't happen, in Tsutsujidai. Even so, Anti is here, heard and seen.
He is the truth God could not swallow down.
A choking hazard.
That's... how he feels.
How he was told to feel.
Anti blinks and turns, looking up to Rikka. His shoulders rise, slightly; his chin ducks, just so. He smolders, all banked embers and smoke, as his brain struggles with the concept of what she's telling him.
"I..."
I am;
I must be.
She asked for me to exist,
and now she asks me why I'm here.
But you
gave me shelter
from the rain.
He doesn't have the words -- CANNOT have the words. Constantly tossed between love and rejection, how can he express how upsetting it is, to hear no one -- no one is useless! It shakes him precisely because he cannot deny it, even as he must deny it, the information he has at open war with the discord of his home. Rikka's actions are consistent with a world where everyone has some use; so are Nidaime's; so are Sousuke's; so are Renais's; so are Jude's; so are Sayla's.
Even so, Akane doesn't act that way. Alexis doesn't act that way. Asuka doesn't act that way.
It doesn't make sense.
It doesn't fit.
And it is a thing communicated entirely in his trembling eyes, the tension of his jaw, the tightening of his fingers.
"I have to... figure it out," the autointelligence kaiju says, softly, as he turns away from the mirror. One hand reaches up, to grasp his opposite elbow.
"How our world works..."
... what a strange reply, to the idea that no one is useless.
<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.
There's a lot going on inside him, Rikka can tell that much. From the look in his eyes, the way he moves and holds himself...
His situation really must be complicated. She's not going to pretend to understand she knows everything that's going on deep inside.
And his response... it certainly is a strange one.
"...I wish I could tell you something helpful." She admits. "I think we're all still trying to... figure out how the world works, too."
Thinking about it... when they parted last time, he had a phone with him. With that said, she reaches for her own phone.
"Do you still have your phone? I can give you my number. If you need anything... feel free to call me, okay?" Rikka offers. "Even if it's just for another shower."
<Pose Tracker> Anti has posed.
Anti learned that, too. It's a useful phrase, to be able to say his situation is complicated. More honest than 'fine'; safer than the truth.
But... she doesn't know what to say. She wishes...
There's something to that, too -- something else he can't express. The way Rikka tells him, when she doesn't know how to respond. Akane... Akane just leaves. Leaves him in silence, leaves him entirely. But -- but, he wonders -- are there any similarities between those two reactions?
If Akane knew what to say, she'd say it. She doesn't hesitate to tell him things which hurt.
He wonders what life would be like, if Akane could say -- she wished she could tell him something helpful. If she could admit she didn't have the words.
And then he wonders what life would be like
if he could admit that, too.
"...", he says, with more consideration. His gaze drops, with her hand. Watches her reach for --
Reflexively, Anti stiffens.
But she's asking him. Asking if he has his phone -- offering her number. He reaches into his pocket; thankfully, his phone is still intact. (Was it not put through the wash? Or, perhaps, it just doesn't care. The marvels of modern technology... surely.) "..." He says, again, lips parting, as he looks down at the screen.
His phone is... something Akane uses, when she wants him to fight. Something she uses to order him around. It's... Akane's territory.
"..."
Firmly, Anti hits the button to transfer the contact data to Rikka's phone.
But -- when she looks up from her screen, she'll find that Anti has disappeared from the room entirely.
<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.
Rikka notes the way he stiffens when her hand drops. She flinches internally. She... probably should've warned him about what she was going to do, first, with everything she's gathered.
Though, why is that gesture so concerning...?
There's some hesitation, some silence with the weight of words, and then, finally... he hits the button, and she receives his contact info.
"Okay, we should be all... set..." Rikka looks up from her phone. But when she does, there's no Anti in sight. She pokes her head out of the laundry room and glances around, but... he's gone without a trace or even a sound, leaving suddenly as if with catlike tread.
"...I hope he'll be okay." She murmurs to herself.