2025-01-19: A Lifeline
- Log: 2025-01-19: A Lifeline
- Cast: Flay Allster, Murrue Ramius
- Where: Magallanica, Side 3
- OOC - IC Date: 2025-01-19 (OOC: January 12, 0100)
- Summary: Following the terrorist attack on one of Magallanica's shelter colonies, Flay puts in a request to meet with Captain Ramius of the Archangel. Seeing the ways she's matured in three years, Murrue asks her if she believes the Gaia Sabers are just... and offers her an out. (OOC Note: Takes place after the attack on Magallanica, but before Third Gate Open.)
<Pose Tracker> Flay Allster has posed.
Just a few hours ago, a group of mysterious assailants attacked one of the refugee colonies attached to Magallanica in a brazen act of terror. They were driven off, but due to the nature of their machines' abilities, there's a lot of work to be done yet. Once the battle ended, the already-evacuated Shelter-2 was closed off - for the Defense Forces to begin repairs and for Terminal to investigate the attack.
Since she assisted in fighting off the terrorists, Flay was given an offer to stay at Magallanica to rest, and repairs enough for the Strike E, heavily damaged in the battle, to leave under its own power. It would be better after all, not to invite more Gaia Sabers into the colony to arrange a pickup. Even still, there's an awkward feeling to it. It's not like NUNE is at war with Side 3 anymore, and she isn't a prisoner of war here either, but there's definitely some hostility towards it among its people - and for good reason.
Because of that, rather than wandering the streets, Flay just decided to stay at the hotel she'd been provided while she waits for the repairs, in one of Magallanica's inner colonies. A civilian-use hotel - but unbeknownst to her, Terminal has its ears even here.
It took a bit, before she worked up the resolve to put in a request to speak to the Captain of the Archangel before she left Side 3. Once that's arranged, she waits in the lobby. She's not wearing the full Gaia Sabers uniform, forgoing the over-the-top jacket for a simple red and white t-shirt to go with her skirt and leggings.
Truthfully, she feels a little nervous about this meeting. Sure, she was able to help out the Archangel during the battle. But before this, she'd only ever caused trouble for the crew of the Legged Ship back during the war. Would any of them really want to meet her like this? Not everyone can be forgiving as Lacus was. Still... she does feel like an explanation is owed.
<Pose Tracker> Murrue Ramius has posed.
It was a few hours after the Archangel pulled back into the Magallanica dry docks, when Murrue was overseeing the repairs to both ship and crew that had to be made. The Archangel's Hull and systems were covered in odd micro-cracks, ones that would take a week for her to return to full status, not to mention her already damaged engine. Luckily there weren't any fatalities, and the injuries to the crew were minor, except one engine room member who had a fracture line across an artery in their neck, that had rapid first aid done and saved their life.
As she sat at her desk, Murrue received the request from Flay. Or, First Lieutenant Allster.
(A flash of memories go through Murrue's head. Flay on the bridge watching her father's ship detonate. Flay holding Lacus hostage. Watching Murdoch and Flay clean out the cockpit of the Strike Gundam. Watching Flay leave the Archangel with Natarle and Mu in Alaska. Miriallia shouting Flay's name in surprise right before the strange reality shifting weapon hit the Archangel just hours earlier.)
Murrue mulled over the request. She didn't have all that much personal interaction with the young woman...but she was certainly at the center of a lot of drama aboard her ship. But...she would have some answers. And even though she's now a Gaia Saber, which Murrue still couldn't come to terms with...surely she wouldn't do something so brazen like try and take her life on neutral ground...
Minutes later, Murrue stepped out of the car which brought her to now in something more casual herself, an orange collared long sleeve shirt and light olive slacks. With her was one of the marines from the Archangel, casually dressed as well who she instructed to wait outside, and only come in if there was obvious trouble. Entering the lobby, Murrue scans the crowd, before she spots Flay's distinctive red hair. With a last sigh, Murrue makes her way over to her former crewmember.
"So it's First Lieutenant Allster, now?"
Violet Miyazaki has paged Flay Allster and Murrue Ramius with, 'can i watch the thing'
<Pose Tracker> Flay Allster has posed.
Flay would be glad to hear that there were no casualties aboard the Archangel after the terrorists unleashed that awful psychic attack. Aside from all the damage the Strike E and its Striker Pack took from the outside and inside, the worst of it she really got was a case of whiplash from the cockpit being thrown around so much, which she hadn't really started to feel until the adrenaline of the battle faded.
It's true that Flay didn't really interact with Murrue much personally since she was so busy running the ship. If she wanted someone she knew better, she could have asked for Miriallia. But it's still because of Murrue's actions as Captain that she and the other Heliopolis civilians on the ship survived the war at all - even if she's flashing through many of the same unpleasant memories.
Despite that messy history, Murrue agreed to see her after all - and Flay shifts her legs to give Murrue some room to sit at the table across from her. As Murrue expected, no immediate trouble occurs. Before this, she'd mostly just been fidgeting around with her smartphone, trying to get some kind of decent service amidst the Minovsky-filled aftermath of a battle. Clicking it off, she lifts her head and gives Murrue a thoughtful look, before she breaks the silence.
"...You don't have to call me that. You're not part of the military anymore after all." She answers, when Murrue uses her title... and in the same breath decides to explain why she has it at all. "The only reason I even joined in the first place is because... I guess I couldn't really forgive myself for what I did during the war. I wanted to be able to do something... anything! So I went to Asticassia, and eventually.. I got scouted by the Gaia Sabers."
There's a sigh of her own. "But ever since the Junius Seven incident," and the nuclear counterattack, she leaves unsaid, "I've been worried. I don't want to fight another war. We've already lost enough people, haven't we? The only reason I came to Magallanica in the first place is because Captain Lancaster saved my life during that battle..." There's a bittersweet smile, until the talk about loss reminds her about something and suddenly, she's unable to look Murrue in the eye.
"I heard you lost the Commander at Jachin Due. It's hard to believe he's really gone, so, um... my condolences." While it was never able to cheer her up, he was a constant source of levity on the Archangel, and he always made the impossible possible. She's certain it wouldn't be the same without him.
<Pose Tracker> Murrue Ramius has posed.
Murrue listens intently to Flay, with a sad smile at the mention of Mu.
"He...died doing what he thought was right. It's...it's what helps me get through it." She sniffles a little, doing her best to keep her composure, Flay of course totally unaware how deep Murrue's relationship with Mu eventually grew...and ended so violently. But there's a lot to Flay's concerns that Murrue can pick up on. She's starting to realize why Flay asked for her specifically. She leans back in the chair, her hands folded on her lap and looks at Flay.
"I...know how you feel. I was very, very young when my father was killed at Loum. I of course didn't...well see it happen...but one day he left for space and never came back... it was what motivated me to join the EFSF when I was around your age, when you came aboard the Archangel after Heliopolis." Murrue pauses for a moment, her gaze going off into the distance. "I don't...like to talk about it a lot but I was scouted by the Titans before the Gryps Conflict. To this day I don't know what they saw in me, I was just pushing pencils as an office clerk back then. I considered it... remembering how my father was killed by Spacenoids...but I eventually turned them down. War isn't something I particularly enjoy either. My trade in the EFSF was a material systems engineer, after all, even if my first assignment was to Londo Bell. And war becomes much more difficult when you know the person on the other side is just that...a person. With hopes and dreams and people they love, just like you..."
Murrue pauses for a bit, and then speaks again, hesitant, like she's worried about the answer Flay could give her. "Do...do you know where Lt Commander Badgiruel is, by chance?"
<Pose Tracker> Flay Allster has posed.
Flay nods slowly as Murrue takes comfort in knowing Mu died doing what he thought was right. Maybe it's cold comfort, and Flay never learned the extent of their relationship... but she thinks she understands that sometimes it's all you can do. "He died protecting the ship, right? I'm sure... he had no regrets." She says, and then pauses, seeing Murrue's composure waver just a little.
And Flay is surprised to hear Murrue tell her she can understand how she felt, her eyes widening a little. "I had no idea. I know I'm not the only one, but it feels like... such a thing is way too common in the Universal Century." Has there ever been a period of history with a greater saturation of war, a higher death toll, than theirs? She's equally surprised to hear about Murrue being scouted by the Titans. "I think it's a good thing you didn't." She agrees, knowing how deep down the path of revenge can take a person.
When Murrue points out that the other side of a war is just as human, Flay finds herself thinking about Nicol, who did something so terrible - only because he had no more loved ones left, his own hopes and dreams extinguished by nuclear fire. "I used to hate them," She admits, about the 'other side', about Coordinators. "For starting a war and taking away my father... and because of what I was taught." Her eyes turn downward. "It took me way too long to realize that they were fighting for the same reason. That we all want the same thing."
She lets the silence linger for a few long moments, before Murrue asks her own question. "Commander Badgiruel captained the Dominion at the end of the war, and took me in when I had nowhere else to go. She protected everyone on the ship the best she could... even when Murata Azrael staged his coup." And then she frowns. "But I haven't seen her since the war ended. I wonder if that means she got promoted above field command... though it's a little hard to imagine her working a desk job." NUNE's always been a beurocratic mess since it replaced the Federation and the Gaia Sabers are a very large army, but... "Wish I had a better answer for you."
Flay has her own question in the same vein, one she never got around to asking Lacus during their encounter. "How has Kira been?" And then she hesitates for a moment. "That... was him in the Freedom Gundam during the wedding, right?"
<Pose Tracker> Murrue Ramius has posed.
Murrue nods at Flay's answer. Deep down she knows Natarle would do the right thing, no matter what. Hopefully she was keeping herself separate from all the madness. She smiles at Flay's question.
"It most certainly was." Murrue chuckled. "We certainly made a mess of it, didn't we? And before you ask, I didn't know about Nergal's appearance, or that other Gundam...but Kira's safe. He's been trying to live a quieter life so far, and it was working for him and Miss Clyne... but you can only stay idle for so long before you're pulled back in to cause an international incident. I don't know if I want to speak for him but...I think he would like to talk to you again, even just one more time."
Flay's softening starts to prod at Murrue's mind. It's a far cry from the girl causing scenes on the bridge and whom she heard reports of screaming in the halls for all Coordinators to die. But that's good. She's starting to realize what Murrue did a while ago. Was she at the attempted nuclear strike on the PLANTs? Was she starting to see her hands getting closer and closer to the blood, the kind that would never wash away? Maybe Flay is at the same point she was...and she wants advice on what to do next.
"Flay, do you think what the Gaia Sabers are doing is right?"
<Pose Tracker> Flay Allster has posed.
Deep down, Flay feels similarly about Natarle's position. She'd been through enough with Azrael trying to commandeer her ship, who could blame her for being done with it all. She wishes she could look to her for guidance once again... but maybe that's why she sought out Murrue instead.
"It absolutely was a mess. But honestly, if I was Cagalli... I think I'd probably just be relieved I didn't have to marry someone so pathetic." Flay manages a smirk. Even amidst the chaos of the battle, Flay saw the way Yuna Seiran put saving his own skin over protecting his bride-to-be, and that's just absolutely not husband material in her books.
Flay's smile turns softer, when Murrue talks about Kira. "I'm glad to hear he's safe. And... even I didn't know it was possible, but I was able to make up with Lacus Clyne recently. If they're happy together, I think I can accept that." Despite her acceptance, there's still some melancholy in her expression, and distance in her voice, as if knowing she can't share their happiness. But when Murrue says she thinks he'd like to speak to her again... "You think so?" She wonders, her expression lightening a bit. "...I'd like that, too. I hope one day... we get the chance to speak honestly with each other."
A lot of people have told Flay how much she's changed. But she hadn't really had the opportunity to reflect on that, until now. She's always been a thoroughly reactionary person - she never would have joined the Gaia Sabers otherwise. But it also means she's starting to see how dangerous that tendency can be... the way so many of her allies in the Gaia Sabers have had their souls drained to their limit by war, consumed by that whirlpool of hatred Creuset spoke of.
Does she really want to end up like that? When Murrue asks her whether she thinks the Gaia Sabers are right, Flay is at a loss for words at first. "...The Gaia Sabers' mission is to keep peace, no matter the cost. And I really did believe in that mission. With the Gaia Sabers, with the Strike... I didn't have to be powerless, or to rely on someone else." She says that, but she thinks of Junius Seven falling, she sees the nuclear missiles flying - Rena, Anita, and Shinn all screaming to shoot them down. She thinks of Lilium Valerie, the Boosted Songstress, waiting in her pod to be activated. It could have been her, she reflects.
"But... I don't know anymore." She closes her eyes. "If they really are in the wrong, what am I supposed to do?" She looks to Murrue, and there's a touch of fear in her eyes. Even in all the ways she's grown, she's not the strong-willed person Captain Ramius is. "How did you decide, when it was between the Federation and the Three Ships Alliance?"
<Pose Tracker> Murrue Ramius has posed.
Murrue leans back once more, thinking back, all the way to Alaska, maybe even beyond.
"Flay, do you know how much the Archangel cost?" The question seemed odd at first, but Murrue continued. "It cost the Earth Federation a hair over 10 Trillion dollars to design it, and a further Five Trillion to build a successor to the White Base, half of that was dedicated to producing the positron cannons and a good chunk was the beam laminate armour, and don't even get me started on the actual costs of the five Phase Shift Gundams and their associated weapons systems. The Archangel and the Phase Shift Gundams were the culmination of two decades of technological development, and the Earth Federation probably could have built three space colonies in exchange if they were so inclined. But because I let Kira, and your friends on the Archangel, and trusted Kira with the Strike Gundam, I had tainted it in their eyes."
Murrue continued, resting her arms on the chair. "Now, it may be a little egotistical, but did you ever wonder why they took you, Commander Badgiruel, and Lt Commander La Flaga off the ship, and left everyone else to help hold the line at JOSH-A? Because you three were the only ones they transfered off, and only Lt Commander La Flaga came back, once he found out the truth about what was underneath JOSH-A. It's because they knew who you were Flay. And they thought they could take you off the Archangel, send you to a pilot academy...and put you in a nice new uniform, to do what they want you to do. They put the Archangel in the defence line closest to JOSH-A. They could have simply just pulled me off and given Natarle the ship, made me wait at the base and I would have been none the wiser until I disappeared into a cloud of Photon Power."
Murrue leaned closer to Flay, her face growing more and more serious. "The Earth Federation brass had decided that the Archangel, me, Miriallia...and Sai were going to be the example for Londo Bell. The last threat to stay in line. That our little band of misfits and oddities were ultimately expendable as they saw fit. They didn't care how much money they were going to burn up, or how many lives, as long as a lot of Coordinators went with them."
Murrue leans back again, her face saddened. "The EFSF was my life Flay, and I would have gladly given my life for it. But not like that. Not killed by my own side because I became a liability to them. Flay...you need to make the choice yourself, between being an asset to the Gaia Sabers, or a liability...and I don't think you want to be either."
Murrue got to her feet, took a small card with an encoded comm line on it from her pocket and placed it on the table between them. "I have to get going Flay...Miriallia says she's available if you need her, and there aren't that many hard feelings." She put her hand on Flay's shoulder, and smiled softly. "I know you can make good decisions Flay. You have friends."
<Pose Tracker> Flay Allster has posed.
Flay sits, and just listens, very quietly as Murrue explains the whole story. She knew the Archangel was valuable, why else would ZAFT have been uprooted and destroyed the entire Heliopolis colony in pursuit of it and the five Gundams? Only now is it put into perspective just how politically inconvenient Kira was, that they were willing to sacrifice it all just because he was a Coordinator.
More than that, Murrue's perspective on what really happened in JOSH-A gets a reaction of wide-eyed surprise from Flay. Now that she thinks about it, it was strange - she didn't even want to leave the ship, but high command insisted, no matter how much she complained and whined about it.
Knowing that it was all because they planned to use the Archangel as a sacrificial lamb and example, Flay gives Murrue a horrified look - imagining a reality where Sai, Miriallia everyone was killed while she knew no better. "They always said the Coordinators... ZAFT planned it all." And she had wholeheartedly believed that, up to this day. "But no, it just doesn't add up. Why...?" She can't help but sympathize, knowing Murrue placed all her faith in the Federation and they still tried to sacrifice her.
But the reason why Murrue is telling her this isn't lost on Flay. She knows she's useful to the Gaia Sabers right now. But that's only right now, and the whims of high command are beyond her immediate understanding. "I won't let them use me," Flay nods. "And I won't let myself become a human sacrifice, either." She thinks of Aurora, and then the Colonel. Is it too late to...?
Flay stares at the card for a moment, and slips it in her hand. "A lifeline," She nods, and hesitates, before slipping it in her purse. She smiles, and feels as if she's about to cry. "...Thank you. Thank you so much. I will." Maybe she still feels she doesn't deserve it. But now... she has a big decision ahead of her.