2023-05-30: Head Up

• Log: 2023-05-30- Head Up
• Cast: Akane Shinjo, Rikka Takarada
• Where: Mu Gundam - Cockpit - UNAS
• OOC - IC Date: 0097-05-28
• Summary: Akane Shinjo and Rikka Takarada steal a small moment on their way to Banadiya.

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<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.

The route from the Garuda's present location to Banadiya is a long, winding one. ... it takes Treasure Chest and Aumerei through some of the very worst-hit parts of the Dakar region. There's a stillness to it -- many people remain evacuated a day later, and the sight of the Vist Foundation's new weapon in the region is enough to get most people to put their heads right back down.

Legally, it's flying Federation IFF, though, so no one raises a finger.

A shuttle -- carrying eight members of Vist security forces -- flies roughly 1km behind it, locked with laser comms. Compared to the operation the other night, this... is the discreet option.

Minovsky density remains high. You don't dissipate that overnight, especially not through the loss of this many Jegans and Ankshas. Several critical reactor hits have led to what is described by comms specialists as, generously: 'a mess.'

... that suits Aumerei's purposes perfectly.

Huddled up to Treasure Chest in the cockpit as the Mu Gundam walks along on autopilot, she's been silent until this point. Once she hears a transmission from the shuttle drop due to Minovsky interference, though...

Her eyes meet Treasure Chest's. Can she still...? ... the reason she left so many of these was to make sure even if the Vist Foundation went looking specifically for this sort of suggestion -- they wouldn't find all of them.

"... Access Code," Akane whispers, barely audible. "Rikka Takarada."

<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.

There's not much for Treasure Chest to do at the moment. With the Mu Gundam on auto-pilot, she has nothing but time until they reach their objective. Spending that time with Aumerei, though...

...She's okay with that. It's this time that makes the end-goal and everything they've done to reach it worth it. Anything is worth it if it means an opportunity to spend more time with her.

Soon, Aumerei's eyes meet hers.

"Is something wrong?" Treasure Chest asks. She seems to be considering something - and then she says those words. Treasure Chest's body relaxes against her. For a moment it might seem as if she had simply drifted off, and then...

"...Akane...?" Rikka Takarada murmurs drowsily. "Where...?"

She pauses.

"We're... in the Gundam..." ...There's a hint of trepidation, of recognition, in her voice.

<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.

Akane remains silent for a few moments. It's important to let Rikka get her bearings again -- she can tell that getting herself reoriented takes effort. That drowsy expression, that low murmur -- they're not unexpected.

Low continuity between 'Rikka Takarada' and 'Treasure Chest'... that's good, Akane thinks to herself. It's not necessarily convenient, but it's not a bad thing, either. In the long term, it... might be helpful.

Her hand wraps around Rikka's. "... yeah. We're on autopilot right now. We have to go to Banadiya." Looking down, she says, "They're sending us to pick up Marusan. I... tried to signal to her that something was wrong. We'll see if she shows."

Swallowing hard, she settles in for the difficult question. "How much of last night do you remember?" A hand comes up to comb out Rikka's hair with her fingers. ... after a moment, she also adjusts Rikka's tie.

"We've got... my guess is about an hour before we're out of this. I really wanna just -- talk to you." She has to treat every minute she has with Rikka as if it might be the last, now.

<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.

Akane's hand wraps around hers, and Rikka grips it tightly - for strength, as a lifeline, because right now her presence is what she needs the most.

"Banadiya? Are we..." Rikka starts. ...They aren't fighting anyone else. No - they're going to pick up Marusan. That might almost be worse. She draws in a breath. "...I hope she doesn't."

The difficult question. How much does she remember? For a moment, she just sits there quietly, letting Akane tend to her hair and tie(she only just now registers that she's wearing a tie) as she tries to recall.

"An hour..." Rikka murmurs. It doesn't feel like enough. It'll never be enough. "...I want... to talk to you, too."

'For as long as I can', goes unsaid.

Back to the question, though.

"I... I remember being deployed. I... Knight was there. I fought him. And Seolla, and Judau..." The situation becomes a bit clearer as she works herself through it, though it takes a little effort. "And... Alto, and Sheryl..."

Rikka pauses, horrified realisation crossing her face.

"...Oh. Oh god, Sheryl. She... she didn't understand what was going on, or why we were fighting, and I tried to hurt her, and I could've killed her..." Rikka starts, distress rapidly ramping up and curling in on herself. "And... and then Banagher, and Audrey, and Alouette, and everything with Leina..."

<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.

Akane's own grip tightens right back. She huddles up with Rikka in this cramped cockpit, leaning into the side of the seat. "Me too," she says, softly.

So she does remember, even if things are a little hazy -- even if recall is uneven. "I did my best to keep most of your attention on people who could take it, but... yeah -- that was a few really close calls."

The horror on Rikka's face stings. "I know it hurts right now to think about that, but..." ... it'd be easy to tell her this is something she'll totally get past -- that the pain is transient and she'll be back to herself entirely the instant they're out.

Akane's a terrible liar, though, so she elects not to.

"... that kind of feeling is a sign they don't have their hooks all the way in you," she says, instead. "You're a gentle person, Rikka. Please hang onto that. It's going to suck the whole time until we get out of here. But it's..." Her hand comes up to rub at her face a little.

"It's an important kind of sucking."

During Rikka's tests, Akane was too sedated, too weak to posit the existence of "up." Now she has to try, though. For there to be a future, she has to imagine it -- to create it.

"It's going to be a bit before the Garuda resupplies. You can't pull that many specialized units out of thin air. We've got time to make a plan -- and we've got more allies on the ship. And they have a lot less than they did." She can't quite summon mirth about it, but... "The difference between good and bad direction from an operator is about five seconds."

Looking forward, she says, "We're going to make it out of here, and so are Alouette and Leina." She has to believe it. She has to believe it.

"... You still deserve it," she whispers. "It's probably hard to feel like it, especially after what almost happened."

Distantly, she murmurs, "I should have cut the psycommu aperture sooner." But... when could she have, without it being suspicious?

<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.

Akane huddles up with her, and Rikka follows suit. There's only so much she can do that while still remaining comfortable for both of them in this cramped space, but for now she'll take what she can get.

"...Thank you." Rikka murmurs, as Akane tells her what she did for her. ...It does hurt, though. But like Akane says... it's a sign they don't have her all the way yet. It's just a little hard to believe that she's the gentle person Akane says she is, feeling the way she does now... but if Akane can believe that, she'll do her best to defend that part of herself. She nods quietly, trying to gradually get herself back under control. She breathes in and out, trying to regulate her breathing again. "...Alright. I'll try."

...But they have time, and they have more allies, and the Garuda has fewer. She focuses briefly on Akane when she mentions the difference between good and bad direction from an operator, but it's what she has next that she really fixates on.

...They're going to make it out. Alouette and Leina, too. She really wants to believe that, too - even if, like Akane says, it's hard to feel that way.

"...A bit." She admits, then considers when she says that she should've cut the psycommu aperture sooner. "...Would that have helped?"

<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.

Akane reflects on how easy it'd be to direct Rikka to destroy their escort shuttle and leave. It would get both of them out of there. It would be a decision few would fault.

It would consign Banagher, Mineva, Leina, and Alouette to indefinite misery.

Rikka would never be the same.

It really would make Akane the selfish, cruel person Dr. Murasame is banking on her being, at heart.

So instead... she thinks about that question. "... I don't think you would have been able to get in on Judau without it on," she muses, walking herself through it. "I could have cut it right when he got away from you... but you weren't firing at that point..."

... Akane's gaze turns down and out. "I think I'm just looking for things I did wrong."

What can they talk about...? Where can Akane take this conversation? What would have made her feel better when the future seemed so scary and so closed, back when she was a miserable kid in a guidance office?

"... what's something you want for us," Akane eventually floats. "In the future. Once we're out of here." She knows Rikka isn't in the right frame of mind, and what she says now might not be what she wants once they get away... but it doesn't need to be permanent and real right now, it just needs to be something to look forward to. She needs something that makes it clear the future is still her choice.

She needs a promise.

<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.

Akane walks her way through the question, and ultimately, comes to the conclusion that she was looking for things that she did wrong. Rikka shakes her head.

"...It's alright. We're both still here. I didn't-" Rikka starts. She stops herself, not wanting to voice the possibility that drove her to distress earlier. "...Things could have gone worse. But they didn't."

And then, Akane asks her a question. Right now... It's a difficult question. What's something she wants for them, in the future, once they're free...?

...Even now, as Rikka Takarada, it's difficult for her to form wants and desires for herself. She squeezes Akane's hand again, shutting her eyes tight and taking a deep breath.

"I-I want..." Rikka starts, a bit shakily. "I want... I want to eat your cooking again. I want... to fall asleep watching something together. ...I want to go on another double-date. I want to go to another concert with you..."

<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.

"We're both still here. And you're still..." She takes a breath, trying to find the words for this big feeling. "... you're still the girl who made me real."

She gives Rikka time. She knows she's asking for something really, really difficult -- and indeed, that's why she's asking it. It isn't strictly a dramatic gesture; part of it boils down to helping Rikka maintain that sense of self.

It's heartening -- and yet hurts -- to hear those things she wants. Those things that are so, so small. Rikka's promises are -- the things any girl in love would want. The things everyone ought to have a chance at. The things they wanted to do on their trip. That they're in jeopardy feels so unfathomable, so cruel.

"... I can do that," she says. "I want that stuff, too." She smiles, whispering, "It's a promise. All of those." With a giggle, she notes, "I binged all the Taraba movies that came out while I was living in Tsutsujidai. There's three and, like... well, one's good? Seriously mid output lately. I guess they're trying to get into the REA market and there's all these rules..." She waves it off, a hand yet again coming up to tease at Rikka's still-gorgeous hair.

Playfully, she affirms, "Anyway, when we get out of this I wanna watch all three of them with you. We can huck popcorn at the screen and get mad about it together. You can point out some cool stuff I'm too much of a kaiju liker to notice. If one of them really sucks on a second watch, we can just pass out in bed."

Another firm squeeze of that hand. "And then we can get up and you can rate my toast combo against your mom's." ... that gets her to smile. "I don't think mine's that good yet, hahaha..."

<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.

Rikka nods. And - Akane says she's still the girl who made her real. She can still feel that, the strength of those words. She draws in a breath and squeezes her hand, leaning into Akane a bit more. If she made Akane real... then she has to be real, too.

Akane wants what she wants, too... She manages a small smile when she does, and nods.

"A promise." She affirms. ...A promise for the future. Akane giggles, and it feels like it's been forever since she's heard that sound. Right now, it's the best sound in the world, and her smile widens just a bit.

"That sounds great, but... uuugh, I know what kinda rules you mean..." Rikka replies. Akane teases at her hair. ...It feels really good. She shuts her eyes for a moment, taking the chance to just enjoy the sensation. "...That sounds great. I can't wait."

The thought of being able to just spend a moment enjoying a movie - either for its own merits or at its expense... It's something that's so simple but seems so far away right now, and she wants it desperately.

Akane squeezes her hand again. Rikka smiles.

"If you're making it for me, that's all that matters." She replies. And then hesitates. She's starting to feel... okay now, actually, so she continues with just a hint of a playful tone, "...Mama's is the best, though, so you might have a long way to go before you reach her level. But I'm not going to complain about getting to try them until you figure it out..."

<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.

"Maybe it's better if I never get there," Akane muses, about Rikka's mom's cooking. "The fun part is chasing it, right?"

That playfulness -- that smile. It's not gone. It's such a relief. They can still have this kind of conversation -- even after all this. Even here, in this horrible thing.

... that reminds her, though, that there is a serious conversation they need to have. "Is there anything I can do to make it easier on you?" Akane asks. "If we're still on this ship by the time it's doing deployments again we're kinda screwed, but... you're still gonna have to play along at spots for a while."

It's not a conversation topic she relishes, but... she knows Rikka's still there, even after that sortie. She has to juggle the other half of the situation to keep that true, now -- she has to ensure that it's less of a strain on 'Rikka' to pretend to be 'Treasure Chest.'

<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.

"Maybe." Rikka agrees with a small laugh. "It's nice to have a goal... and in the end, wherever you end up, they'll be uniquely yours."

...It's time for the conversation to turn serious again, though. Is there anything she can do to make things easier on her? Rikka frowns, just a little.

"It's... a little difficult to think of things like that right now." She admits. The only things she can think of are things that would probably be a little too risky. But... she thinks. "Just... stay with me, when you can? And... be ready to pull me back, if I start going too far."

It's very easy to slip into what they've made her, to give into the feelings of aggression. Even outside of the influence of HADES, the violent instinct they've instilled in her is difficult to resist.

<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.

"Okay," Akane says. Her gaze tracks back away from Rikka for just a moment, looking to the viewscreen -- and to the mess the Vist Foundation's made of Dakar. It's...

... well... this is her world. She wishes Rikka were seeing some other part of it. ... but this, apparently, is the world they've chosen to live in, and -- she still has to hope it's better with them in it.

Her eyes track a little further out, past Dakar -- toward the northern coast, toward the sea. She looks thoughtful for a few moments.

"Even if it's turning into desert, it's still... really pretty out there," Akane murmurs. "I want to come back some time. No mobile suit. It'd be nice to see that stuff together with you."

She looks to Rikka, shifting forward in the cockpit slightly to get a better look at her. Her brow furrows a little -- and then, all at once, she turns a little crimson. "... it's still really pretty in here, too. When I said you looked good in that, it, uh, it wasn't just an act, though it's pretty forgivable if you never wanna see pants again in your life."

<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.

Rikka studies Akane's face, and then follows her gaze out the viewscreen. To Dakar - and then, to the northern coast. To the sea.

"...It really is pretty. I've never really seen anything like this in person." She murmurs. Coming back sometime, without a mobile suit... Is that a possibility for them? She has to think it is. "...Yeah. That'd be nice. I want..." It takes a second. "I want to do that too."

Akane shifts to look toward her next - and that crimson is hard to ignore. Rikka goes just a little red, too.

"D-do you think so...?" Rikka asks quietly. She hesitates for a moment. ...It's hard to tell just how much of her tastes are her own at the moment, and how much of it is just programmed cooperation. It feels nice right now, but… She thinks on it for a moment. It’s a little bit familiar, so she pulls on that thread a little more. "...I didn't think it was my thing, but... I remember it felt pretty nice when I dressed up for the… I think it was the pageant before, too. Do you... think I should try it more often...?"

...Drawing on her past experiences... maybe she can trust her tastes right now.

<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.

"It's a totally different vibe from Japan's coast, or the stuff in the Tsutsujidai PLANT," Akane agrees. "The world's big, and there's a lot of stuff that just sucks in it, but..." At least there's this, she thinks.

At least there's you.

"Oh, all of those looks were killer," Akane agrees, with a brief laugh. The smile on her face... seems genuine. "Something about those kinds of angles really works on you, though. I think, hmm..." It's easier to think about this kinda stuff, somehow -- even if part of her worries about whether it's fair, whether these responses are real.

"Fashion's kinda about shapes, right? And since you have a heart shaped face and those very squishable cheeks, it works for you to get a lot more straight, crisp lines somewhere else." She does understand the theory, at least. "Again, only if you wanna. We can go shopping once we get out of here either way." Akane understands the value of being able to make choices, after something like this.

After all, when she felt like she didn't have any choices left, Rikka found one she could make.

... yeah, she's starting to find her footing again. "And speaking of those squishable cheeks," she continues...

... yeah, she's going to plant a kiss right on one of them. It's just a quick peck; it'd be... embarrassing, if they got out of the Minovsky-dense zone and greeted their security team with the sounds of sucking face.

"God. I've wanted to do that the whole time," she says, as she pulls back away.

<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.

"Yeah." Rikka agrees with a nod. "It's... good to know there's still things like this."

Akane comments on her looks and Rikka laughs, just a little. The angles, though... She considers that for a moment as Akane elaborates.

"...My cheeks aren't that squishable, are they...?" Rikka grumbles in protest... but, it's clear that she isn't that upset. She nods, though. "...Yeah. I... I want to do that. I want to go clothes shopping with you. I can't believe we haven't done that yet..."

Akane brings up her cheeks again, though - and plants a kiss right on one of them. Rikka goes just a bit red... but she smiles. ...She struggles with herself for a moment, wondering it's right.

"...You too?" She asks, with a small giggle. "...I want something, too." She pauses - and reiterates, "I want something."

This is what she wants - and it's the same thing she wanted once before. Those memories are still vivid in her head. She doesn't know how many chances she'll have left. For all she knows, this might be the last chance she has. So, while she still has the opportunity... she leans forward, kissing Akane on the lips. She's on the same wavelength as Akane, though - it's just the briefest moment of contact before she pulls back away from her. She doesn't want to get caught - doesn't want to find out what the consequences will be.

...But right now, it's enough to keep her going.

<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.

"They're cute! Seriously one of your best features," Akane replies. God, she thinks a little distantly as she shifts to pull herself back up from kissing posture, my knees are going to hurt from standing like this for this long...

Conceiving of a future leads to yet more future to conceive of. It's... a good feeling, and one Akane's glad is still available to Rikka. And then --

-- Rikka says she wants something. Rikka says she wants something. Akane feels her shift forward and up, and --

Those lips touch hers. She wants nothing more than to press against her forever --

-- but there's no 'forever' here. Still... there's a bright spot in the 'now.'

Her expression turns a little mournful, as she pulls away, looking at the instruments again. "... I think we're approaching the end of our little hiding spot," she says, as they reach the other end of Thies. "You ready?"

<Pose Tracker> Rikka Takarada has posed.

Akane thinks they're cute... One of her best features, even. Said squishable cheeks go a little pink.

"Well... if that's the case, then... I think I can get used to it." Rikka decides.

Pulling away, Rikka smiles. It's brief, but it's there... Just as this moment has felt all too brief, but neither can deny its power.

She knows what comes next. Truthfully, she isn't ready. How can she be? ...But she knows she can't stay like this. She knows it has to end. Rikka reaches up, taking one of Akane's hands and giving it a squeeze.

"...Yeah. I'm ready." She murmurs - and waits.

<Pose Tracker> Akane Shinjo has posed.

Akane gives Rikka's hand a squeeze back. It hurts to have to do this. For the person she's come to be, it's... challenging. Her eyes track out toward the sea again; she can't quite look Rikka in the eyes for this.

... but it's all in service of getting her back home and safe.

"Access Code: Treasure Chest," Aumerei says, distantly.

She rubs at her face a little bit with the hand that isn't holding -- Treasure Chest's, now. "Sorry," she says. "Basic maintenance. Your -- performance," in what sense of the word, "should be fine now."

<Pose Tracker> Treasure Chest has posed.

Akane says those words, and like before, Rikka's body slumps against hers for a moment. A moment later, she begins to stir, drowsy as if she had been asleep this whole time.

"Basic... maintenance?" Treasure Chest murmurs. The sleepy fog begins to clear, and she releases her hand. "Yes, of course. I understand. I feel much better, now."

She doesn't question it. She probably should, but she doesn't.

"I'll endeavor to perform satisfactorily." She says with a resolute nod.

<Pose Tracker> Aumerei has posed.

"Of course," Aumerei agrees. "I don't think you'll have any difficulty with that."

"... You're the strongest person I know," she affirms. "And no matter where you go --"

"-- I'll be with you, with the part of me that's a little like you."