View source for 2022-10-18: Look At This Photograph

{{Log
|cast=Banagher Links, Kamille Bidan
|location=Side 4: Sweetwater
|summary=During a meeting with his new mentor, Banagher offers him an unexpected gift.
}}
{{PhaseAndTurn
|phase=1
|turn=2
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 <Pose Tracker> Banagher Links has posed.
<poem>
For all the rush and action that heralded Banagher's arrival to Sweetwater, the days that followed have been... almost boring. Getting to spend almost all his time with Audrey is a gift, one he's thankful for. Texting Leina, working with Nanai to understand the Unicorn's arcane systems... As he promised to the younger Ashta sibling, Banagher is doing his best.

Full Frontal is out there. After seeing him in person, Banagher's heart burns with the desire to take the Cyber-Newtype down, to make him pay for his callousness at the battle of Torrington. The battle is often on his mind. Without something dramatic occupying his mind, the young man can't help but relive it over, and over again. Amuro Ray. Loni Garvey.

Just as in the hospital, dark circles have grown beneath Banagher's eyes. He's only sleeping the bare minimum to keep himself going, the rest of his time occupied with racing thoughts or trying to get work done. Today, as he waits for his new mentor in one of Sweetwater's restaurants. It's a place of relative quiet in the crowded, dirty colony, and Banagher's chosen a table toward the back, hopefully to provide Dr. Bidan with enough privacy to speak openly with him.

Banagher has questions. Dozens, maybe hundreds of them.
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Kamille Bidan has posed.
<poem>
Kamille's No Good Very Bad Visit to Londenian has ended, and he has a stopover in Sweetwater before meeting up with the Ra Mari again. It's one he planned carefully, because there's someone he's here to meet up with.

He can already sense torment and exhaustion coming from Banagher's room before he even approaches the table, which just reminds him of Liam's urgent warning. Nope, can't let them have Banagher, can't let them have /anyone./

"So," he says as he sits down, "first things first. This makes me a hypocrite, but you've got to do your best to get enough sleep. And if you don't order a real meal here I'm going to bother you about it, because minds need nutrition too." His expression softens just a little bit. "But...I understand why you might be in a bit of a state. How are you holding up?"
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Banagher Links has posed.
<poem>
Straightening up as he senses Kamille's presence, Banagher fusses with his hair. He's got to make a good impression. Dr. Bidan has known some of the greatest heroes of this century, and while he knows he won't measure up, Banagher is going to give it his best effort all the same.

"Dr. Bidan." Banagher greets, managing an exhausted smile, "I'm so glad to see -- huh?" Immediately, his mentor begins caring for him. It's a bit of an unfamiliar feeling, but Banagher doesn't mind it so much. Ducking his head, he nods. "Okay. I'll order something decent."

"Um." Looking down to the menu, Banagher thinks about how to phrase his state of mind. "Not -- great. While I was in the hospital with Leina, it was easy to focus on her and not think about things too much. Audrey's here now, and she's helping me so much, but --" Managing to look back up, Banagher frowns a little. "I don't know... how to come to terms with what happened. I don't know how to make sure it won't happen again."
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Kamille Bidan has posed.
<poem>
"Good. There's..." Kamille lowers his voice, briefly. "There's reasons to be taking care of yourself. Fatigue leaves you vulnerable." He's not sure what else he should say about that in particular in public. "Also, I'm a doctor and I get to be bossy about that." Taking his own advice, he orders a shrimp salad and sparkling water, then listens to Banagher.

"You mean with the Unicorn? How much do you know about it? I've never heard of a Gundam acting autonomously to protect its pilot like that. Sometimes they do /things/ we can't explain, but not quite like that. Does it have a strong AI? Do you think it might be a Psychoframe issue?" From doctor mode to mobile suit technical nerd mode.
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Banagher Links has posed.
<poem>
"Vulnerable to what?" Banagher asks, lowering his voice as well. "Is something going on?" While not close enough to Kamille to be able to truly read his emotional state yet, it's obvious something is distressing the young doctor. "Can I help?"

Seeking to earn points with his mentor, Banagher orders the same meal. If Dr. Bidan is ordering it, it must be the right choice, nutritionally.

"Almost nothing." Banagher admits. "I only became her pilot by chance, and she was kept a secret before then, so any research has to be done first-hand. There's nothing we can reference. She definitely tried to save us from Amuro, I wasn't even in the pilot seat and she managed to put her arms up to try and protect the cockpit."

This is one area the two men can connect in easily. Mobile suit engineering has always been Banagher's passion. "Instead of an AI, she has what's called, um. Newtype-Destroyer mode?" It's always embarrassing to say it out loud. "It activates when it senses a Newtype pilot -- Cyber or normal -- that has a psychoframe unit. When it does, it kinda... takes me over, and does whatever it thinks it has to, to protect me."

"When the NT-D is activated, it really amplifies whatever state I'm in. If I'm angry, or scared -- it runs wild trying to get rid of whatever things are upsetting me. That's what happened at Torrington. Amuro's Gundam set it off, and then I panicked, and got trapped 'inside' the program." Banagher looks down. "I almost hurt people I care about. People Leina cares about. And I wasn't able to help the person I came there to help."
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Kamille Bidan has posed.
<poem>
Kamille can't help but notice how eager Banagher is to just...listen. It's endearing and also a little alarming because holy crap, this kid /really does want a mentor/ and the models Kamille has for that are:

A) Quattro, compelling, complicated and deeply flawed in ways Kamille could write essays about even if you ignore the Axis Shock;

B)Guy Shishioh, who Kamille still fanboys and therefore could never emulate;

C) Tetsuya Tsurugi, who is so Dad he is an actual dad. Kamille is pretty sure he has a Dad Score of -3.

He sets all that aside, though there's a modest neck-scratch. "She, then." If Banagher calls Unicorn a she, so will he. "That's fascinating, though. Like I said, that's the kind of behavior we'd expect of a Super-AI. Newtype Destroyer Mode is a bit /ominous,/" he admits, "but it sounds like it registers psychoframe activity as a threat. I wonder why that specifically?"

He folds his hands on the table. "What you're describing there with your emotional state is a lot closer to psychoframe activity, though. The Zeta psychommu reacts-reacted to me like that sometimes, and drew on energies I'm still not sure I understand. I don't think you can blame yourself for panicking in that situation, though. Did you know I was falling apart out there on the battlefield too? Lashing out at my ZAFT opponent like it was her fault because I needed some kind of target?"
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Banagher Links has posed.
<poem>
Kamille gets a bright smile for accepting Banagher's terminology for the Unicorn. "Yeah. It's unprecedented for any Gundam I've ever read about. And that's not even getting into the Laplace Program..."

"Unicorn is made almost entirely of psychoframes." Banagher goes on, "She transforms when NT-D mode activates. That's when it turns red -- maybe you saw it at Torrington?" Listening to Kamille talk about the Zeta is fascinating, and Banagher's fingers tap the underside of the table. Part of him wants to take notes. "Your Zeta must be a predecessor to the Unicorn..."

Shaking his head, Banagher gives Kamille a gentle smile. "I admit, I don't know much about your battles, Dr. Bidan. I -- how did you ever make up for it? For falling apart? Did the people you care about--" Banagher closes his mouth. After a false start, he goes on. "Were they able to forgive you?"

"Oh, before I forget." Reaching into his hoodie pocket, Banagher hands Kamille a photograph. A blond man wearing sunglasses stands next to what must be a younger Dr. Bidan. They look happy. "Audrey and I, sort of broke into Char's old mansion here in Sweetwater. We found this." Banagher flushes a little, looking away, embarrassed. "Then Full Frontal found us and nearly tore the whole place down... But we're okay."
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Kamille Bidan has posed.
<poem>
Kamille is about to go on geeking out about psychoframes and Gundams, but Banagher is, innocently, very good at asking penetrating questions. He's quiet for a second, searching for the words. Then he smiles, but it's an old, tired one, a little fractured. "I hope they did forgive me, wherever they are now. But I have no control over that. All I can do is keep improving until I can one day forgive myself. Sorry," he adds, "probably not the optimistic answer you were looking for. I'm not surprised the Federation doesn't teach much about the Gryps conflict." He shrugs. "It was...brutal and ugly. I hope you don't have to go through anything like that. I hope nobody does."

Then he sees that photograph and blinks in recognition. He picks it up and stares. "...God, his goofy pose and everything. He was so /weird/ sometimes," he mumbles as he taps the picture of Quattro with an index finger. There's something almost like forlorn affection underneath all the irritation in his voice.

"Wait, that asshole really kept this picture? Hah...I thought he just decided Quattro was dead."
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Banagher Links has posed.
<poem>
Worry creases Banagher's brow as Kamille responds. "I'm sorry. I -- didn't mean to ask such a painful question." Kamille's words feel prophetic. Maybe Banagher will wind up taking the same path. It'll be ages until the crack of Leina's spine hitting the cockpit will fade from his waking memory.

"I hope I don't have to see anything like that, either." Banagher murmurs. "And I wish you didn't have to. How did you make it through? I -- never meant to end up like this. It's not what I was expecting, and sometimes I worry I'm going to wind up... Leaving Audrey alone. Everyone in the Earthsphere wants the Box, and I'm hardly an ace pilot." Leina at least has Sayla and Judau, but Audrey is like him. No family. No friends. Zinnerman would watch out for her, but that's not enough.

With barely-concealed curiosity, Banagher watches Kamille tap the photograph. "Woah, so it's really true? Your mentor was Char?" Banagher's voice is half-awed, half-confused. "It was with a picture of Char and Audrey -- um." Banagher leans in, whispering, "Princess Mineva." Leaning back out, he raises his voice again. "So I think... you still mattered to him. At least as much as she did."

Trying to be respectful, Banagher waits a few moments before he can't contain his curiosity anymore. "What was he like? What did he teach you?"
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Kamille Bidan has posed.
<poem>
"Princess-" Kamille's eyes widen, but he stops quickly and nods. Right. 'Audrey.' "You really do find trouble, don't you...?" But he's smiling, a little.

"None of us ever mean to end up like this. Us veterans who've been through it before, we'd keep it from happening to you if we could, but the world's a lot stronger than we are. Best we can do is offer help. As for how I made it through, I don't always know. Fa, she kept me from drowning. And Bright helped stabilize me, Koji would give me a friend my age who had the same kind of anger issues, Guy was just.../Guy/. I knew enough people who proved that people were worth fighting for, and they cared about me. You seem like you have a lot of people who care about you, so just treasure them, alright?"

He looks back at that photograph.

"Quattro was...even I couldn't read him sometimes. He was arrogant, a real know-it-all, but he could back it up. He would keep you at an arm's length sometimes, like he was afraid of what would happen if he got too attached. But he cared. He wouldn't have bothered with me if he didn't care. He helped me figure out combat, work through some of my capabilities, he told me about the history of the Earth Sphere...he plucked me out of Gryps when I couldn't get away from that fascist hellhole fast enough."

He laughs, bitterly. "And then he took back the name of Char and attempted to destroy the surface of the Earth when I was still in physical therapy. I guess I should be glad he didn't ask me to help him so I didn't have to slug him in the face again."

(Again.)
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Banagher Links has posed.
<poem>
Banagher laughs, looking down. "Yeah. Before all this, I was just a college student. I was planning on going to Jupiter after school, and then --" A soft smile. "She fell out of the sky. And everything changed."

Kamille's advice is absorbed with wide eyes and a few eager nods. "You've already done so much. I wouldn't ask you to fight this battle for me." All the same, the feeling of wanting to be protected... it's nice. A gentle memory broadcasts from Banagher -- nothing more than the sound of a piano.

"I've met Koji, he seems like a really great guy. He and Leina are close." So many names -- so many heroes! But as for treasuring the people who care about him, Banagher smiles. "I can do that. That's what I'm fighting for, so the Box can become a symbol to inspire change, and hope! Sayla told me I need to be careful, because people in power will try to use my loved ones against me. Threaten them to get me to cooperate."

In this moment, their food arrives. Banagher politely thanks the server, then digs in. He eats, well, like a teenage boy. The sparkling water seems to throw him a bit, but it was Dr. Bidan's choice. It must be good.

"He really cared about people? Even after everything he did?" This is less surprising than it really could be -- Audrey is proof of the Red Comet's ability to love. "I -- wow. I didn't expect any of this. I thought you were going to tell me he was some kind of cold nobleman, perfect and... I don't know. More like Full Frontal."

Banagher nearly chokes. "/Again?!/ You punched him in the face?" His face is a comical picture of shock, and then he laughs. At first, he tries to cover his mouth, but it's too much -- he's almost hysterical at the thought of it. Char Aznable, hero of Zeon, the man who did so much harm -- punched by a blue-haired teenage boy.

It's been a while since Banagher has been able to laugh. It seems to do him good -- by the time he gets himself under control, his shoulders are more relaxed, and he gives Kamille a sincere smile. "You're so cool, Dr. Bidan."
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Kamille Bidan has posed.
<poem>
Kamille laughs with Banagher, and then reddens slightly. "Me? Cool? I /wish./ You'll meet much cooler veterans, I promise." But there's a little smug glow to his smile that suggests yes, he /does/ think he's pretty cool, actually.

"I used to be a lot more, uh, reactive. You're a good kid and I'm not used to that because I was a delinquent, you know? Past me would be annoyed with how boring I've turned out. And no, Quattro didn't have that air of nobility you might expect from a Zeon prince. He was cocky in a soldier way. I mean, there were times you could kind of tell he had a weird upbringing. He didn't know what a MacDaniels was. Full Frontal is that 'heir of Char' guy, right? Sounds like a fraud to me, but you had a closer encounter with him than I did."

He stirs his salad. "He cared, which kind of makes it worse that things turned out the way they did. If you didn't know the kind of potential he had as a leader, if he could get out of his own head, it wouldn't have broken your heart to see where he went. Man, this is the first time I've talked about it with anyone but Fa in...a while. You're easy to talk to, but let me know if I'm overloading you with an old man's problems."
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Banagher Links has posed.
<poem>
Banagher beams, pleased to see Kamille laughing. "No way. I don't think anyone but you can claim to have punched the Red Comet in the face. Or have been his personal student."

"Well," Banagher fusses with his food. "I used to get in fights a lot as a kid, but it made trouble for my mom, so I tried to cut it out. But the day I met Audrey, I fought off half the Garencieres' crew. And a Cyber-Newtype!" He looks rather proud of himself. "They were chasing her. I pretended my Haro was a bomb, and they all fell for it."

He doesn't want to look like a total nerd to his mentor, after all. Maybe he's never punched out one of the Earthsphere's most notorious villains, but throwing Marida Cruz off a stairwell is no small feat either.

"That's so weird. Did he just not watch TV? Not knowing what a MacDaniels is..." Banagher says, covering his mouth so he can talk as he chews. "Full Frontal's always going on about being Char's vessel this, Char's successor that. 'Oh the will of the people'." Banagher waves a fork in the air. "He didn't even care his people died at Torrington for him. He wasn't even there! He's got to be a fraud. He might look like the guy, but he clearly doesn't act like him one bit. Full Frontal's always got his hair all curled, and he wears these stupid robes, and a big tall collar." Banagher scowls. "He's every bit the asshole he looks like."

It feels good to be trusted enough for Kamille to confide in him. "No, I'm doing just fine. It's fair, right? I'm telling you about my problems, and you're telling me about yours." Another try at the sparkling water. Still weird. "It must've been really hard for you to see where Char ended up, from when you knew him."
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Kamille Bidan has posed.
<poem>
"Amuro must have done it once or twice, right? Those two were weird about each other." Kamille shrugs. "As far as I know I was his only protege, but who knows what went on in Axis? Be kinda funny in an awful way if he tried to replace me." There's a sour edge to his smile, but it's still there.

"You fought them all off by yourself? That's awesome! Especially if you weren't even a trained soldier." Still, in his mind he makes note of how...unusual that is. Newtypes don't have boosted physical abilities. Hmm. He mulls over that through a mouthful of salad, but keeps it to himself. Banagher has enough to deal with for the moment. Let him feel proud.

"It would make Char so mad to know there's a royalist type pretending to be him. Serves him right, wherever he is. Char..."

He lets the silence linger for a moment. "For a long time I thought, at least I don't have to face him again. But then Amuro Ray came back. Which makes me wonder...like I said, those two had ties I don't fully understand. Mmm, but it's fully possible that wherever Amuro went, Char didn't survive the trip..." Another long pause. "If he ever does come back, I am going to beat the shit out of him."

Which should answer the question of what it was like to see where Char went.
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Banagher Links has posed.
<poem>
"Oh, good point." Banagher acknowledges. "Still, that's still a pretty small category. Just you and Amuro Ray, I bet. But there's no way he could've replaced you! If he cares like you say, and he kept your picture around.. I just know you mattered to him."

Banagher practically preens under Kamille's praise. "Yeah, I was pretty proud of it. I think Audrey was impressed, too. She let me hold her hand and everything."

"...do you really think he'll come back, too? And be corrupted, like Amuro?" Worry is clear in Banagher's voice. "After everything he did as a normal person. What would a corrupted version be capable of? Do you think he'd try something like Axis again? Would he and Amuro just try to kill each other again?" Endless questions.

Audrey and Leina both... They didn't deserve to have to deal with Char coming back from the dead. Banagher would be willing to do a lot to keep them safe from that kind of future.

"If he comes back, and we've got to fight him." Banagher says, fussing with his food, "I'll come with you. If you want me to. As long as I can keep the Unicorn under control, I think she might be able to keep up with him."
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Kamille Bidan has posed.
<poem>
Kamille doesn't prod further on how much or little he meant to Char. "I have no idea," he admits. "This is all speculation on my part. Anyone under Triple Zero's influence is dangerous, no matter who they were or what they were capable of before. If there's one thing about Char, it's that he's hard to predict. Be prepared, but I suppose there's no need for us to invent trouble when a corrupted Amuro and GGG brings enough of it. That said..."

He reaches across the table to fist-bump Banagher. "I have a feeling there's going to be a line to get at him, but we'll nudge our way to the front of it, how's that?"
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Banagher Links has posed.
<poem>
"Alright." Banagher says, seriously. It's time to review his old copies the footage of Char's duels with Amuro. Well, once he gets his Haro back. If he gets his Haro back...

Fighting by the side of his mentor sounds thrilling, even if it's against as formidable an opponent as Char Aznable. "That sounds great!" Banagher fist-bumps Dr. Bidan back, pleased at the acceptance inherent in such a gesture. He must be doing a good job at being a student, so far. "Thank you, Dr. Bidan. I feel a lot better about everything."
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Kamille Bidan has posed.
<poem>
"Honestly? So do I." Kamille grins. Banagher's cheer really is infectious. He must be doing a good job of being a mentor so far, right? He is getting a good grade in mentor.

"Hey, weird question." He glances down at the photograph again. "Can I hold onto this for a while? Just...for personal reasons."
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Banagher Links has posed.
<poem>
"Of course." Banagher says, of the photograph. "It's yours, more than anyone's really. You can keep it." He smiles. "I hope it brings back good memories more than bad ones."

Before the meeting winds down, Banagher has one last question. "Dr. Bidan, could you teach me some piloting tricks sometime? I think I'm doing alright, but I know I have a lot left to learn. As a fellow Gundam pilot, I know I could learn a lot from you."
</poem>

 <Pose Tracker> Kamille Bidan has posed.
<poem>
"Eh, sure, why not? A veteran is allowed to do a little training on the side, as long as it's nothing official. The Mk II may not be able to keep up with the Unicorn, but it still has some life in it."

Kamille takes the photograph with a nod of silent thanks, and pockets it.

He has no idea what he'll do with it, but he can't stand the idea of letting it rot away for Full Frontal to ignore.
</poem>